Dreams of a Wild Heart

by Danube Adele

  The young woman was making herself comfortable, checking out her appearance in the standing mirror near the bathing room door before sitting in a chair near the window which was now nailed shut. Tabron had barged in earlier with a determined look on his face. Setting my smartpad down on the bed, I’d scrambled off and assured him I would not be going out the window again. He’d just pulled out a handful of nails and a hammer and set to work while I stood by him watching. Strangely though, before he left, he caught sight of the picture I had up on my smartpad and stared at it. It was my grandmother’s seventy-third birthday party, and my mom, her sisters and all the grandkids, had squeezed into a shot with a birthday cake that we’d all joked was going to set the place on fire it had so many candles. My grandmother’s quick comeback was that having hunky firemen show up would be a wonderful birthday present. Tabron slowly picked it up from the bed and given it a good long stare.

  “You have your mother’s smile.”

  “I do.” I gave a short nod. “Whose smile do you have?”

  “I don’t know.” For a moment, I thought I saw a flash of vulnerability cross his face, but then he was setting the smartpad back on the bed and striding out without response.

  “Who are you?” I asked the girl curiously.

  “Tarra. The king’s niece.” She looked me over with sharp blue eyes. “My uncle tells me you need some clothes. We look to be about the same size.”

  “Oh, that’s okay.” My protest was immediate. I wasn’t going to be here long enough to wear them. At least, that’s what I was telling myself. I couldn’t let go of the thought that I was going to get myself back home. To actually wear the clothes from here felt like I was admitting defeat, settling in.

  “Did you bring clothing with you?”

  Feeling stuck, I admitted, “No.”

  She stared at me in silence for a moment. “You’re thinking to get out of here.”

  My smile was humorless. “I’m not sure it’s possible.”

  “They took you, didn’t they?” She sat near me on the bed.

  “Yes.”

  For a moment I thought she was going to empathize, or at the very least, sympathize with me, but then she shrugged as though I’d just said I wanted fries with that. “You aren’t the first and won’t be the last. I just thought I’d help you feel more comfortable while you’re here.”

  The lack of any kind of appropriate response to me saying I was kidnapped was staggering. Here was someone else who thought it was just fine to take. It had to be a cultural characteristic. Maybe there was a reason they were getting blasted by the Sunan so often. “You said I’m not the first? Others have been brought here from Earth?”

  “Earth.” She heaved a dramatic sigh. Either she hadn’t heard my question or didn’t want to answer it. “I’ve seen some pictures of what it looks like there. I’m sure I would love it. Beautiful clothing. Handsome men. Have you gone to the beach? Do you have any of those bathing suits that are like underwear?”

  “A bikini?”

  “Yes!”

  Instead of pummeling her with questions, maybe I could befriend her. “Just over the summer, we had a big beach bash for my cousin’s birthday. I have pictures. You want to see?” My bag was sitting on the floor, and at Tarra’s eager nod, I grabbed it up and rummaged until I found my smartphone. Pulling up the app for my albums, I quickly scrolled to the pictures I was looking for.

  “Is that the ocean? Who are those people you’re with?”

  “My cousins. That one is Bailey, and next to her is Cassie.” They were smiling at me through the camera lens, their glossy black hair up in scrunchies. I could almost smell the coconut oil and the warm salty air as it blew incessantly off the ocean. Moments later, Henry had convinced us to throw on our fins and go bodysurfing, after which we’d had the best tri-tip steaks and potato salad ever made.

  Would I ever be there again? Being millions of light-years away, it seemed unlikely. Out of nowhere, my throat clogged. Homesickness. I tried to breathe through it, but it took a few quietly focused breaths. It had been such a perfect, sunny day. I’d have given anything to be able to diagnose a wart on Stephanie’s ass for her if it meant I could be home.

  Tarra looked at me like she was trying to figure out what was going on in my head. I gave her a small smile and shook my head to let her know I was okay. I swiped the picture so she could see how to do that, but then looked away so she could swipe to her heart’s content. I didn’t want to lose it in front of her. Until I had a better sense of who she was in this production, I didn’t want to give myself away.

  “How were you able to see images from Earth?” I leaned back on the surprisingly soft pillows.

  “Frank brought me a stack of magazines that had so many beautiful pictures for my birthday.” She kept swiping as she spoke, pausing here and there to look more carefully. “There were ads for movies and fashion and places to go. I’ve only ever been stuck here.” A hard edge crept into her tone.

  “Which ones? Vogue? Vanity Fair?” I looked over to see that she was still engrossed in looking at my pictures. She was probably seeing the pictures of my climbing trip the previous year at Joshua Tree National Park. There was a great climbing spot there. Maybe she was seeing the pictures of my baby cousin’s birth. Of course, I wasn’t the doctor in the operating room, since I’m not an Ob-Gyn, but Ariana had wanted me there for support. It was her first baby, and she’d been afraid. I explained what was happening step-by-step, and it helped her to stay calm. Out popped her baby boy, Nigel, named after his British father.

  Tarra shrugged her carefree smile and kept looking at the pictures. “I don’t know. I barely learned my letters before the schools shut down. A few of the people who are older than me got to learn to read. Not me, though. Partly, I didn’t care.”

  “Why not?”

  “I was more focused on the fact that my family had died, and no one could tell me why.” Caustic tone poking out, but just barely, from the pleasant voice. Everyone seemed to have stories of death and destruction.

  “How did they die?” The vision of a young girl finding her family slaughtered was coming to mind.

  “I don’t know. Just disappeared. I was little, out exploring in the woods, and when I got back, they were gone. Everyone just kept saying it was the Sunan, but I didn’t buy it, and what could I do anyway? Ral’e stepped in to father me. Used to walk me around on his hip through the village on market day. People loved it. Thought he was a great man for being my da when I didn’t have one. Besides, I thought I saw others...”

  “Who...”

  “I don’t know...” Silence grew as she pretended to look at a picture when really, I could see she was thinking, her eyes focused on the bed sheet.

  “What others?”

  Sharp and mildly unpleasant was the expression I finally got from her. “I don’t know. I was just a dumb kid. Anyway, my mother was the king’s half sister, so he took me in and started caring for me. I’ve been here ever since.” She handed me back the smartphone, and from the look on her face, I could see that I’d touched a nerve. It was bothering her to look at my family pictures just as much as it bothered me.

  “Why did the schools shut down?”

  She frowned trying to remember. “I’m not sure. It was nearly twenty years ago, I guess. Everyone was sad about the king’s death. Everyone really loved him. So we focused on building the military. Men and women were allowed to train and prepare.”

  “Were there any attacks?”

  “There were some border attacks, but there wasn’t a big one until two years ago.”

  It was likely the one Tabron had told me about. “I’m glad you were able to survive that.”

  She shrugged seeming more apathetic than anything.

  I tried to go back to my original question. “You said others were brought here?
What happened to them? Are they still here?”

  Tarra sighed. “A few women were brought here. I’m not entirely sure where they went. They weren’t invited to stay in the palace, so I forgot about them. Why are you here? They invited you to stay in the palace. Why? What is it you were needed for?”

  “I’m a doctor.”

  She nodded, looking slightly more impressed. “Here to help my uncle?”

  “That’s what I’ve been told.”

  “I hope you can help him. We had another doctor here, and I don’t know what happened to him. My uncle was not happy with his work.”

  He probably ended up a piñata out in the tree. And his family would never know.

  “Anyway, I heard you need to pick a mate. Many of the men would do well for you, but stay away from my cousin, Morten, the king’s son. He’s a danger to women.”

  “Is he abusive?”

  “He’s...wrong.” Her expression was one of somber warning as she talked about him. “I don’t think he treats women well.”

  “This place feels dangerous,” I confessed. “I feel like I’m surrounded by violence and death. When I first arrived, there was a body hanging in the tree.”

  “I believe he was accused of stirring up discontent with the villagers. They said he was going to steal food from the royal stores and was trying to encourage others to join him.” She gave her dismissive shrug and smiled. “It’s only dangerous if you go against the king.”

  “Any other advice?”

  She gave me a good long look as if debating what to say. “Everyone has troubles here. The more you can help others solve their problems, the more others will help you solve yours.” That sounded not only cryptic but long-term. I fought the prickles of panic and took a deep breath, smiling my thanks. There wasn’t going to be an easy solution here.

  A knock on the door broke up the conversation. When Tarra singsonged to “come in” Tayla was there, ready to help me get ready for the noon meal and my engagement feast. Tarra took the opportunity to sail from the room with a casual smile on her face, promising to see me at the luncheon, not the least bit disturbed about what was happening.

  “Do you know which of the dresses you’re going to wear?” Tayla asked.

  Feeling despondent, I said, “None of them.”

  To my surprise, Tayla came around the side of the bed and sat near me. She smiled, then confessed, “I did what you told me to do this morning. I took several minutes to eat my breakfast with the sun on my face. It felt good. And then I took the broom outside as though I was going to do some sweeping, but took a walk around the garden instead.”

  “I’m so glad.” I sat up, feeling a jolt of pleasure at her words. “And I also want you to put your feet up at night. It looks like you’re on them all day, am I right?”

  “You’re right.”

  “Keep them elevated while you’re relaxing at the end of the day. I’m sure it will help them keep from swelling too much.”

  “I’ll do that.” She looked down at her hands briefly. “It’s not my place to say this, but I really think it would go better for you if you play the game.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Pretend to go along. You can’t make every point a battle or you’ll anger the king. When he’s angry, he makes rash decisions.” A hint of sorrow touched her eyes. “Pick the fights that need to be fought or you won’t be able to survive here.”

  She was being so kind. At least someone was. It made me think more of my own mother, and a glance down at my phone showed the picture Tarra had left off on. Seeing the picture of my mother and me together had put her off somehow. “Would you like to see pictures of my family?”

  Hesitantly, she nodded.

  The picture was of my mother and me, our faces smashed together in a close-up. It was from the last Sunday meal I’d shown up to, surprising everyone with my presence. My mother had insisted on a selfie of the two of us for proof.

  “She’s your mother,” Tayla murmured with some wonder. She was transfixed, looking at our two faces. “You look so much alike. She has a beautiful smile. She looks happy.”

  “She is. She and my father just celebrated thirty years of marriage.” This time, I couldn’t outrun the choking feeling or the well of warm tears that splashed down my cheeks. I flipped to another picture and it was of all my female cousins and myself all crowded together. Henry had taken that picture. “All the women in my family have a similar look.”

  “You do. It’s remarkable.”

  I swiped at my cheeks one-handed. “It’s killing me that they don’t know where I am. I know they’re going to be worried sick.”

  “I believe it.” She nodded with a knowing look that spoke of her own deep pain. “That’s why you need to keep yourself well. Stop fighting this. Allow the king to relax with you. It will give you room to think and to plan.”

  Smart words. It made me wonder why she was still here. “Have you ever tried to leave?”

  She looked down at my pictures again and shook her head. “I no longer have anyone to leave for.”

  All of her people were gone. What a sorrowful reality. But she was absolutely right. I was going to need to be patient, bide my time. If they thought I’d submitted, it would give me breathing room, space to investigate and figure out how to get back home. My mother and father were going to see me again. It was a promise I was making to myself. If I could be brought here, I could also get home.

  “What do you think is appropriate, Tayla?”

  “There’s a beautiful dress here with a wide neckline.” She rummaged through the pile and came out with a long ivory dress in a cottony fabric that had delicate red and orange blossoms printed on it.

  It felt like I was making a fateful decision, and one, I hoped, that would lead me back through the wormhole. “Let’s do this.”

  After a quick rinse, I sat at the vanity while Tayla worked my hair up into an elegant updo. I used some of my cosmetics to enhance my eyes and lips, and then came the dress. It fit me like it was made for me. The wide neck showed off the top swell of my breasts and outlined the rest of my form which had some nice curves. I wanted to make this count. I needed it to look like I was going all in if they were going to believe me.

  “Listen, child,” Tayla brushed off the skirt and straightened again, facing me in the mirror. “Open your heart and mind to the spirits. They will protect you. They will steer you rightly.”

  I nodded, appreciating that she was feeling motherly toward me. “Thanks for all your help.”

  “I don’t want your mother to have to feel what it’s like to lose a child.” Tayla’s eyes remained dry, but acceptance of bone-deep sorrow reflected back at me. When I turned to hug her, she waved me off with a smile. “Don’t mind me. I need to see that the meal is ready.” She gave me a quick pat on my hand and was out the door.

  I wasn’t sure what to do now that I was dressed. My nerves were giving me fits of anxiety, heart palpitations and difficulty maintaining my regular breathing pattern. What was this next meal going to bring? Who was going to be forced on me? Looking out the window and fixating on the spot of greenery in the distance let me calm down. It was likely the edge of the gorge, where I first beat death. Then I heard the knock on the door and my heart knocked out a tap dance on my chest.

  Breathe in, breathe out. Calm brought clear thought, and I so needed to be thinking on my toes for this next stage of the game.

  Strangely, just as I was going to call out, I realized I could feel it was Tabron knocking, and couldn’t prevent the small blip of anticipation that sent my heart knocking against the wall of my chest just a little bit faster. There was that vibration to the air I’d felt a few times now, a kind of signature stamp, something I couldn’t explain but I knew by feel it was him. Or maybe I was really going crazy, hearing voices and thinking
I could feel someone’s vibrations. Wouldn’t Kevin get a laugh out of that?

  I took a deep, steadying breath. “Come in.” Immediately, the door opened.

  Tabron was there, his shoulders practically filling the doorway in his dark tunic that was belted at the waist. He was big and masculine, a sight to behold, but his beautiful eyes were hard with untold secrets. He always seemed to be alone, even with his men around. Did he not trust them either? Not wanting to feel any soft feelings toward him, I let my anger flow, thought of how he was responsible for all that was happening to me.

  “You appear to be ready,” he offered briefly. I didn’t miss the small flare of interest that had his eyes trailing my body in a quick sweep. But he kept his distance, remained in the doorway as though there were an invisible line keeping him out.

  “Sure. This will be a grand time. This is exactly how I imagined I would fall in love and get married.” I blinked a pretty smile at him.

  “Life isn’t always pretty.”

  “So I should thank you for helping me to open my eyes, Viking?”

  “Let’s go. We don’t have time for this.” The vein in his temple flared. “We don’t want to keep the king waiting.” Be done. Move on. Find distance.

  Did he want to get away from me so badly?

  “Oh no. Let’s. Maybe you could give me some advice on who to pick? Tarra told me to avoid someone named Morten. She said he’s a psycho. Maybe you could recommend someone for me? Trust me. I’m all ears.” Sarcasm felt good.

  “They’re all good men.”

  “Are they really? Does any of them abuse women?”

  “The Brausa are honorable men. They don’t beat women.”

  “That’s right. They just kidnap them, which I’m sure is much better than sporting a black eye. That’s for sure. So tell me, is someone a good lover? A nice guy? Pretend I’m your...sister.”

  “You’re not my sister.” The warning growl in his tone was building. I can remember the feel of her sweet body under my hands, the sway of her hips. I can still see her dancing in my mind.