He Remains Faithful
Page 19
Chapter 20
“Hey Mom, we’re home!” Mikey and Sam called at about 4:00 on Sunday afternoon. They ran into the house and jumped on the couch, hugging Kelly and simultaneously telling them about the weekend with Mike’s parents, excited over riding on grandpa’s tractor. Mike trailed behind them carrying the luggage. He gave Kelly a quick hug. “My parents said hi, and that they missed you.”
“So,” Kelly said. “The boys certainly had a good time.”
“They were ecstatic over that tractor ride. And of course, mom spoiled them with all their favorite foods. I had trouble dragging them away this morning. Did you get a lot done this weekend with all this time to yourself?”
“Yes I did. It was a nice quiet weekend. I think I’m ready to face the grind again on Monday. My work is, the house is clean, and I got in some great exercising.”
“Did you get to go out with any friends? You haven’t done that in a while.”
“Most of my friends were out of town this weekend. Must be something in the water.” Kelly was about to walk out of the room, but she turned back. “I’m glad you all are home,” she said and kissed Mike lightly on the lips.
When the boys had settled in for the night, Kelly walked into the den and sat next to Mike. He was watching television and playing a game on his laptop. She sat close, and he put his arm around her. As Kelly sat there, she began to crave affection. She got up, put on a nightgown, and brushed her teeth. When she walked into the den, she decided to take a risk. She kissed gave Mike a long kiss and turned off the television. “Did I mention I’m glad you’re back?”
Mike smiled at her, but he continued playing his game, not saying anything. Kelly kissed him again and touched his face. “I’ll be in the bedroom if you need me.”
Several minutes passed, and Kelly was afraid that Mike wasn’t coming again. When he did get into bed, he asked her a question. “What’s going on tonight?”
“What do you mean?” Kelly asked, puzzled.
“I mean, you haven’t seemed to want me near you for weeks. We haven’t been close. Now all of a sudden you want me?”
Kelly’s heart sank, and she didn’t know what to say. “I just missed you. You’re my husband. Isn’t that enough reason?” She scooted closer to him.
Mike sighed and went into the bathroom. Kelly turned away so that he couldn’t see her tears. He didn’t want to be with her, he was irritated at the idea. Then Mike climbed back into the bed and put his hand on the small of her back. A wave of sadness passed over her. “It’s okay Mike. We don’t have to.”
Mike sighed again, annoyed. “Well, I’ve already taken the pill now.”
He rubbed her back, and then kissed her. Her heart was so heavy. He was with her out of duty, not love. She tried to smile and make things pleasurable for him, but inside her heart was breaking. She fought to hold back tears as Mike made love to her. Actually, she thought, it wasn’t making love. It was a chore for him.
As soon as it was over, Mike pulled on his pajamas and left the room. Kelly had never felt so empty in her life. She curled up and hugged her pillow tightly, but sleep wouldn’t come. Emotionally drained, she cried long and hard. If that was the way Mike felt about being with her, she would never ask him again
On Monday, Kelly walked around as if she was in a daze. She had not slept well, and she was still heavy hearted. She ached with the realization that her needs had become an inconvenience to Mike. With tremendous effort, she was able to keep her mind focused on work. When she received the email stating that there would be an impromptu staff meeting at 3:00, she groaned. Her head was splitting, and her body ached. A meeting was the last place she wanted to be.
Just before 3:00, the employees began to fill the conference room. Kelly spoke to several of her friends and found a seat beside Megan. Andrew came into the conference room, but he took a seat at the other end of the table.
“Hey, did you have a good weekend?” Megan asked.
“Yeah, a great weekend,” Kelly answered.
“Really?”
“Yeah, I got a lot done, and it was nice to have some peace and quiet. How was the wedding?”
“Oh, you know, it was a wedding. All the bridesmaid duties kept me pretty busy. But it was nice, and I got to see a lot of old friends.”
“Ladies and Gentlemen,” Bob called them to order. “The sooner we start the sooner we can all go home, which I know you all would like to do.” A few agents chuckled. Bob went on to give them the quarterly report and discuss some new opportunities. Kelly tried to listen, but she couldn’t concentrate very well. She did her best not to look at Andrew. She didn’t want him to think she was completely heartbroken, even thought that was exactly what she was.
After the meeting broke up, Mark walked over to Megan and Kelly. “How about a quick drink before we all go home?”
“Sounds good to me,” Megan said. “Kelly?”
Kelly shook her head. “I better not. I’ve had a headache all day. Didn’t get much sleep last night. But I’ll take a rain check.”
Before she left her office, Andrew came in and closed the door. “Kelly, are you okay?”
Kelly didn’t look up. “Sure, I just didn’t get much sleep last night.”
Andrew could tell she was lying, and he moved closer to her. “Kelly, look at me.”
She turned around, but she looked past him, not wanting to meet his eyes. “It really is okay, Andrew. I just have a bad headache.”
“I’m so sorry. I know I hurt you, but I didn’t want to hurt you even worse down the road.” He wanted to hold her, but he knew it would be impossible to do so at work. “I care about you.”
Kelly turned around to finish packing her briefcase. “Andrew, please don’t worry about me. I’m okay; I appreciate you caring about my feelings. I just need to get home and sleep off this headache. I’ll see you tomorrow,” she smiled and left the office.
The television was blaring when Kelly arrived home. She felt a ringing in her ears, and her head throbbed. Mike was sitting on the couch, and he looked up at her, concern in his expression. “You okay?”
“I have such a headache. I don’t know why. I think I am going to lie down if that’s okay.”
“Sure, I’ll tell the boys to stay in the front of the house. Do you need anything?”
“Just some quiet and a dark room, thanks.”
Kelly took off her skirt, shoes, and blouse. She crawled into the bed in her underwear and pulled the covers over her head. She could feel the throbbing in her neck, her teeth, and even her hair. She closed her eyes, and within minutes she was asleep.
“Kelly,” a voice whispered to her across the drowsiness. “Kelly, are you okay?” It was Mike, and he looked worried. He felt her head and said, “You’ve been asleep for four hours. Do you want anything to eat?”
The thought of food made Kelly sick to her stomach. “No. I just want to sleep. Can you put the boys to bed?”
“Already done. Let me know if you need anything.” He kissed her forehead and left the room, closing the door behind him.
In the wee hours of the morning, Kelly awoke. She was sweating, and tears were rolling down her cheeks. What was the dream she had? Why was she crying? She lay there afraid, unable to fall asleep again. Her heart pounded, and she turned on the light like she had when she was a little girl. It did nothing to assuage the unexplainable fear she felt. “God, please help me to go back to sleep. Please take this fear away.”
The voice that had been silent for months stirred. All a man’s ways are right in his own eyes, but the Lord tests the heart. Kelly rolled over and closed her eyes more tightly. That wasn’t what she needed. She needed sleep. If My people who are called by My name shall humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways…Kelly willed herself to think of something else. Their hearts are far from me…
“Stop!” Kelly shout
ed into her pillow. “Stop. I need sleep. I need…Andrew.” The voice was silent again.