Promise Me Forever (Top Shelf Romance)

by Kate Stewart

  Lexi pulled a chilled bottle of vodka from the fridge and lined up three shots.

  “To Dead Sergeants,” she proposed, and we all threw them back. I looked pointedly at Ben. “Just don’t forget about the little people.”

  “Never,” he said before he poured another set of shots, his eyes resting on Lexi and hers on the bottle he was holding. “To my girls,” Ben toasted, as Lexi quickly wiped a tear from her eye just in time for him to miss it.

  The space between she and I disintegrated in that moment, as she watched any future with the man she loved move past her in a one hundred mile per hour blur. And I hated that she knew what it felt like. But it was time to return the favor.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Xanadu: Olivia Newton-John/Electric Light Orchestra

  I locked the door behind Sierra when she left the following Tuesday. I felt ridiculous and time was of the essence. I had only texted Nate once to apologize, and he insisted I was fine, but I couldn’t help but feel like I had somehow sabotaged my chances with him. So, I let myself open up to finally having what I deserved with a man who deserved me. I thanked my lucky stars it was Halloween as I set up the boom box I left at the front desk, along with the tabletop disco ball.

  “Fuck me,” I said under my breath, my nerves getting the best of me.

  “Sierra?” Nate called from his office.

  Shit. Shit. Shit.

  Moving quickly, I hit the light switch and activated my pint-sized disco ball, setting the room off in reflective light as Olivia rang out through the office. The atmosphere quickly morphed into my chosen scene as I started my apology ballet.

  Nate’s laughter was instant as he moved from behind his desk, his emerging face completely expectant as I raced around the office in my roller skates, white knee socks, and my off the shoulder dress with a slit up both thighs. Nate stopped at his doorframe, his arms crossed while his laughter echoed.

  Don’t trip. The point is to look sexy here, Stella.

  “What in the hell are you doing?” Nate said as he shook his head.

  “I’m apologizing,” I said as I tried to gracefully disappear around a corner and appear again, the way Olivia did in the movie. “Magic” started to play as I finally rolled up in front of him.

  “For what?” he asked, looking down at me with softened eyes full of amusement.

  “I drink too much sometimes,” I said, rolling back and forth in front of him, pushing off his chest only to skate back to him.

  “Stella,” he said as his eyes glittered. “Most people drink too much sometimes.”

  “I just . . .” I shrugged as he leaned down and took my chin in his fingers.

  “You just what?” he whispered.

  “I just. I’ve been thinking and . . . I think I want to start our story now,” I whispered back, before I leaned on my bright orange stoppers and wrapped my hands around his neck. The look on his face was a priceless mix of emotion and need. Indigo eyes searched mine as he cupped my face. I will never forget the way he looked at me, like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen before he slowly fused our lips. His kiss was gentle until my first moan spilled, and then it became a whirlwind. He had us reversed in seconds, me against the doorframe, his tongue opening me wide as we tangled in a kiss that obliterated any doubt.

  “Nate,” I moaned, my nipples drawn tight, pulse racing.

  “Jesus Christ, baby, did you lock the door?” he rasped out before he bit my bare shoulder and trailed the pads of his fingers up my thigh.

  “Yes,” I said as he ripped himself away, his breaths coming out fast.

  His wheels were turning. He didn’t want to reduce us to an office fling, but we both knew better. I could see his decision before he said a word. “Fuck it.” We collided, hot mouths, tasting tongues, my moans and his groans. I was twisted to face his door, my skirt lifted as he gripped my throat and turned my lips to his. He slid his hand between us as his tongue stroked mine in the most thorough of kisses. His fingers dipped below my panties and he found me slippery. I shuddered as he gently massaged my clit with a single finger. I was shaking limbs in seconds.

  “I’m . . . come,” I said, breaking from his mouth. His blue eyes watched me as I burst in his hands, my breaths coming out hard, the wave hitting so fast he had to keep me from buckling.

  “More. You told me to ask. More. Right now.” His eyes pooled as he grinned down at me, finger dipping low while I recovered my breath.

  “You’re so damn beautiful falling apart on my fingers. I need you on my cock, now.” He flicked his wrist and it was instant. He swallowed my orgasm as he pinned me to the door. I melted into him, my heart thundering, my cries muffled by his need to feast.

  “Nate,” I said breathlessly, as he ripped me from the door and pulled my dress—in one sweeping movement—over my head. I stood bare in roller skates, socks, and white, string-bikini style panties I had worn just in case. I untied the sides and they fell between my skates.

  “I’m officially fucked,” he said as he moved toward me, a skilled predator, hungry. His mouth found mine, possessive, scalding as he lowered me to the desk and spread me wide. He practically ripped his tie away before he unbuttoned his shirt, his eyes blazing a trail from the top to the tip of me. His etched chest rose and fell as I trailed my eyes down to the V just above his slacks. Nate was solid muscle, chiseled and pebbled, and after his shoes came off, his pants and boxers hit the floor. I gasped at the sight of him pumping his cock as he watched me squirm on the hard surface of the desk. “Wider, Stella,” he ordered as he fisted himself. His eyes fluttered briefly before he pulled a condom from his wallet and sheathed himself. Leaning over, he didn’t hesitate as our eyes locked before he buried himself in one solid thrust.

  “Oh my God.” I reached for anything I could as he sucked my nipple hard before he withdrew and thrust back in. My back bowed off the desk, and I fought to lift my legs with the weight of the skates. Nate pulled my body up easily, his fingertips biting into my flesh as he fucked me like we were at war. Lust dripped from his eyes as sweat trickled down his chest. He swiveled his hips, opening me further as I felt the build start to catch. With one more thrust, I was screaming his name.

  “God, goddamn,” he swore as he tore through me, his hips picking up. He was so deep, all I could do was scratch and tear at his arms as he wasted us both.

  “Stella,” he said reverently, as he buried his forehead between my breasts and rolled through his orgasm, his body shaking minutes after we both came. We lay in a sweaty heap while I ran my fingers through his hair.

  “That escalated quickly,” I said with a soft laugh.

  He looked up at me with a sleepy grin. “I can’t feel my legs.”

  “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

  “Think you can roll us home?”

  “Doubtful, mine are going numb, too,” I said. “Please take them off.”

  Pulling up his boxers, he picked up one skate and placed it on his thigh, unlacing it before he removed the other.

  “This was without a doubt the strangest music to have sex to. You’re such a weirdo.”

  I laughed as the Electric Light Orchestra sang “I’m Alive”.

  “You will love it, eventually.”

  “I guess I better get used to it,” he whispered as he massaged my foot before he gripped my hand, helping me into a sitting position. We had destroyed his desk and papers were strewn everywhere.

  He slid my dress over my arm, leaving hot, tongue-filled kisses on my breasts and neck before he covered them up. He pulled the dress so it covered my lap.

  “This was not a sex soundtrack. It turned into one because of you, you horny old man.”

  He gently gripped my chin. “I’m going to go clean up.”

  “K.”

  “Don’t sit here and think woman thoughts, okay? You’re taking the right side tonight.”

  I bit my lip and nodded with a smile. He went to the bathroom, and I straightened myself out and refast
ened my panties. I sorted through the paperwork and was close to putting it in some sort of order when I felt his arms slide around me. “That was some first kiss.”

  “It was,” I said, turning to face him. It never failed. I always hitched my breath a little at the sight of him. I hoped that never stopped. “I meant it, you know. It’s been a crazy year, and I’ve been all over the place, but I’ve done nothing but think about what you said to me for days.”

  “Stella, if you think there’s a fucking chance in hell I’m letting you get away after that, you’re crazier than the lady who just roller skated into my office.”

  “Same lady,” I said with a lip twitch. “It was a fantasy of mine. I figured if you went for it, you’d be worth a shot.”

  “Best Halloween ever,” he said with a grin.

  “I brought you some candy.”

  He swept his lips across mine. “Just keeps getting better.”

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Trouble: COLDPLAY

  New Year’s Eve

  “I wish I was there to kiss you,” Nate said, his voice full of regret.

  “Yeah, well, you suck,” I teased. “It’s fine, Nate. Paper comes first. It has to.”

  I dug myself deeper into the couch as I watched the ball drop.

  “Ten, nine, eight, seven, six . . .” we said together as we rang in the new year. He was in Chicago meeting with some ad execs and wanted to get a head start on introductions before his meetings. He was courting them while I was left to pine for him on my couch. I hadn’t given him a single ounce of crap for it. He was taking care of both of his women in some capacity.

  “Did you feel that kiss?”

  “I’m eating a donut, so no,” I said with a chuckle.

  “I’m sorry, baby,” he said. “I wish I could have taken you, but you’d be trapped in a hotel.”

  “Next time. I have to work all day tomorrow. It’s a miracle I got the night off.”

  “I have to get back to the party.”

  “Go get ’em.”

  “I wish I was inside you.”

  “I’ll be sleeping on the right.”

  There was that lingering silence, the one where we both wanted to say more words but waited. I loved that silence. It said so much more than words ever could.

  “Hurry home.”

  “Bye, beautiful.”

  More silence. Neither of us wanted off the phone.

  “One day we’ll travel together. Oh shit!”

  “What?”

  “I forgot to put a suitcase outside my door!”

  “What?”

  “It’s not midnight everywhere yet, right?” I said breathlessly, throwing the mountain of blankets off of my lap. Texas was a sea of ice and had been for weeks.

  “Stella, I’m so confused,” he said with a chuckle.

  “Just a superstition.”

  “Ah,” he said with perfect understanding, because he knew me, sometimes better than I did myself. He was one of those men who studied my reactions, worked hard for my smiles, and fucked me like it was his job. I’d never had one of those men before. I fell in love with the promise in his eyes, his voice, and the comfort of being myself without being judged. His love was unconditional, though he had yet to utter the words. It was a given. Being with Nate was the most natural relationship I’d ever been in. He’d stolen my breath and was doing his best to steal the rest, and it was working.

  “What does this one mean?”

  “Leave a suitcase outside your door on New Year’s Eve? It means I’ll be a world traveler one day.”

  “Better get it outside,” he said with an amused voice.

  “’Night,” I said as I hustled down the hall to my bedroom.

  “Night, weirdo,” he said affectionately, the rumble of his laugh cutting off as I hung up. I was a weirdo, and I loved that he knew that about me and embraced it. I was even more of a weirdo that night, bundled up like an old maid with the red muumuu nightgown my mother had gotten me for Christmas and the green and red stripped socks with a jingle bell attached to Santa’s hat. Paige and I managed a few civil sentences to make it through the holiday, though the grudge was still there on both parts. I spent my first Thanksgiving with Lexi and Ben. I burnt the turkey, Lexi glued the mashed potatoes with the beaters, and Ben choked it down without a negative word. Because he loved Lexi the same way Nate loved me.

  Nate spent the holidays with his parents and all but begged me to join him, but I told him it was Lexi and my first year as independents, though we’d done a shit job of it.

  The band wasn’t leaving for California until the first of the year, due to scheduling issues. At least that’s what Ben had told Lexi, so she’d practically moved in with him. When Lexi wasn’t at Ben’s, it meant they were arguing, and I stepped up to do whatever I needed to keep her calm. She was fighting to keep her insecurities on the back burner, and though I’d caught a protest or two from Nate, when she needed me, I was there. Ben was exhausted and it showed when he stood on my doorstep in the late hours of the morning, his eyes connecting with hers in a plea until she flew into his arms with a ready apology on her lips.

  They were terrified, but Ben remained determined to prove to her that they weren’t changing, no matter what happened with the band.

  Time would tell.

  Neither of us believed him, but I kept my opinion out of it. Lexi had enough riding against her. Sony wasn’t just any label. Things were about to change drastically for everyone.

  Between juggling the shows, writing for the paper, my boyfriend, and my best friend, I felt like I was living two lives. We never spoke a word about Reid, and I never asked. It was as if he didn’t exist. And I had to admit, it was a relief because I’d allowed myself to be happy in my new relationship. And I was happy. As happy as a girl could be alone on New Year’s Eve with the promise of a fresh year filled with Nate Butler. He was everything: kind, considerate, attentive, beautiful, and thrived in the boyfriend department. He’d spent the last two months exhausting himself at the paper and then showering me with whatever affection he could muster, and it was always more than enough.

  I rolled my suitcase down the hall, opened the door, and was met with a gust of freezing air. I set it outside and was just about to close the door when I smelled smoke.

  And where there is smoke . . .

  It was like an electric jolt.

  I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply before I lifted them to meet the watchful eyes of Reid Crowne. He’d been standing there for hours judging by the amount of cigarette butts that lay scattered around my porch.

  He crushed his cigarette under his boot as I let my eyes drift up. Shock resonated as I saw he looked . . . healthier. He’d gained a few pounds. His hair stuck out underneath a gray beanie that matched his long johns shirt, and it looked sexy as hell on him. His jaw had filled out, too, and was covered in thick stubble but trimmed neatly on all sides. I was wordless as the air spiked with familiar tension. My mouth failed me. Words failed me. In his eyes, I saw curiosity and relief. And then his lips upturned.

  No.

  After a silent minute, his eyes flicked to the suitcase I set outside the door.

  “Going somewhere?”

  I took a step out in the freezing cold. My socks drenched in the chill the minute they hit the pavement.

  “What are you doing here?”

  He smirked and I died inside.

  No. Please. No. Don’t smirk. Don’t smile. Don’t look at me!

  “That’s a mighty sexy nightie you have on there, Grenade. Will the rest of the retirement home be joining you tonight?”

  “Reid, cut the shit. What are you doing here?”

  “Can I come in? It’s fucking freezing out here.” He blew hot air into his fists.

  “No,” I said and shut the door behind me, blocking my apartment.

  “Okay,” he said and shoved his hands into his jeans.

  I just stared at him in my crazy muumuu, my hair piled on top of my head in
a messy bun.

  “I just wanted to talk a minute.”

  “I thought we said it all.” My voice had bite. I was bitter. I had Nate. I had no reason to be bitter.

  “Stop looking at me like that,” he said, his voice low.

  “Like what?”

  “Like I’m a caged animal. Like you’re afraid of me,” he said, taking a step forward. I winced.

  “Damn it,” he snapped. “It’s me, Stella. I’m not here to hurt you.”

  The tension built in my chest as I tried to tamp down my emotion. It was bitterness, resentment, and a lot of anger. Anger I hadn’t realized I was still holding on to.

  “Stella,” he said softly. “I’ve wanted to call you so many times.

  “But you didn’t,” I said with a sharp nod. “You look great. I’m glad you’re doing okay. Congratulations. Happy New Year, Reid.” I slammed the door behind me, and a second later, it hit my ass with a thud and pushed me forward.

  “Stop,” he snapped, shutting it behind him.

  I whirled on him. “You don’t get to tell me to stop! You don’t get to tell me shit!”

  My neighbors’ party was audible between our walls and a collective ring of laughter sounded through them. I was supposed to go to bed after I spoke to Nate. I had plans. Reid was screwing up my plans, and I was tempted to join my neighbors just to get away from him. He stared at me like he could see through my robe. In a defensive move, I slid my arms around my stomach and gripped my sides.

  All I thought about was fleeing, even though it felt like I waited an eternity to see him again. I used to pray for the day he would show up to my door.

  “Why are you alone?”

  “I’m not alone,” I whispered. “I mean, he’s in Chicago.”

  “Okay.” Reid’s jaw pulsed. “You’re with that guy?”

  “Yes. Nate. We’re together. Now. I didn’t lie to you about that. I’m not like that.”