Remy by the Sea

by Candice Blake

  It was all up in the air. I tried not to think about how crazy this was, how uncertain everything in my life was to be with Remy.

  But I guess that's what happens after I almost died. Watching the ship get destroyed in the ocean and feeling the freezing water brushes up against my skin reminded me how fragile this life is. I realized that if something is worth fighting for, I'm coming after it.

  I told my parents what happened during the few months on the island and I watched both of them cry in disbelief. I knew how much they loved me now that we talked. I knew how much they cared.

  It was sad to leave again. Sad to see the anguish on my mom's face not knowing when she'll see me again. Sad to see the numbness in my dad's eyes thinking about how little time I was back in his life.

  But that's life, isn't it? Part of me wished there were clones of me so that I could be in more places than one. But that's part of it I guess, every moment is fleeting.

  I knew my parents would always be there in Venezuela with a home cooked meal when I returned. I would never take that for granted.

  Remy told me about Drake's funeral a week ago and I was still confused about how I felt about him. I didn't know him for very long. Thinking about what he did to us on the island, leaving us there to die, still made my body heat up in anger. I tried to put myself in his shoes but I didn't know him well enough.

  I thought about seeing Remy again after being apart for what felt like an eternity. I couldn't forget the feeling of running my hands through his rough beard and his soft tender kisses. I imagined the way he would massage my shoulders to relax me. His bright smile and the wrinkles on the side of his eyes when he was happy to see me.

  He was such a gentleman and I looked up to him. I knew the accident made him lose a bit of his confidence as a captain, and his zest for life. And I consciously decided to make it an effort to help him search for it back.

  We were minutes from landing and the shakiness of the plane gave me a bit of anxiety. I looked down at the water below that looked calm from the distance but I knew how deceiving it was. The man sitting beside me must have noticed the look on my face. He let out a gentle and relaxed smile to let me know that everything was okay.

  For the weeks since being rescued, I had nightmares of drowning. I would wake up gasping for air, sometimes screaming as I did. My bedsheets would cling onto my sweaty back.

  I cried a couple times in bed not only because of how real the dream felt but scared that if I fell back asleep, it would happen again and again. So I would wake up, change my sheets, and step outside, waiting for the sun to rise so that I'd know I wouldn't drift back into the darkness.

  I didn't want to tell Remy or my parents this. I didn't want them to worry about me any more than they did. But I wondered if Remy had these dreams too and if he did, I wondered if they were worse than mine. They've only gotten more intense as the time went on and I hoped they would go away soon.

  The plane approached the eastern islands of Canada and I could see the city for the first time. Buildings and boardwalks lined the coast. Thick green trees grew abundantly outside the city. It was just before the sun was about to set so I saw the lamps above the highways light up in sections. I always loved the feeling right before exploring a new city. I knew this one was going to be even more special with Remy by my side.

  I could see the airport now and the plane soared lower in the sky. The wheels hit the runway and I could take a breath.

  Like sheep, every passenger followed the person ahead through the jet bridge into the airport. My breathing was unsteady, interrupted by thoughts of seeing Remy again.

  The wait to claim my luggage seemed like an eternity. There was a hoard of people waiting for their bag. When I saw my large blue backpack come out of the rotating turnstile, I grabbed for it immediately.

  In my bag were some clothes and a few disposable cameras that I had purchased in Venezuela. I took these photos of my parents, my home, and my neighborhood right before I left. I was excited to develop them once I arrived to have them as a memory.

  Most of my belongings were lost on the ship months ago in the ocean. Coming here to Canada would be a fresh start to the chaotic events prior.

  I walked towards a row of doors that led to the main atrium of the airport. As people passed through, I could see pockets of warm light from the atrium penetrate the luggage claim area. I knew Remy would be waiting patiently behind those doors.

  I took some deep breaths, trying to remain calm. He's just Remy, I tried to tell myself. Then I laughed. It was okay to be nervous because he wasn't just Remy. He was the captain of my life. He was the man who endured the most difficult obstacles with me. I trusted him.

  I opened the door and a sea of people were looking at me hoping I was the person they were waiting for. But when they realized I wasn't, they looked on as the next door opened and another person came through. But in the sea of faces, standing near the back, I saw Remy, taller than most in the crowd. He had a very slight grin on his face. Our eyes locked and he stepped forward, people politely parted as he made his way towards me.

  We stepped towards each other. Remy grabbed my face with both hands caressing my cheeks, bringing me in for a gentle kiss on the lips.

  He pulled away and he gazed into my eyes, then brought me in for one more kiss. I had never been kissed in front of so many people, but I didn't care, he was the only person I could see in that moment.

  "Let's get some food?" Remy said quietly.

  "You know the way to my heart," I said.

  We walked around the crowd smiling and staring at us. Remy took my backpack off and slung it over his right shoulder then held my hand as we walked towards his car.

  In the backseat was Pablo.

  "You brought him!" I said. The way I said it sounded like a mix between a question and a statement.

  "It wouldn't be a proper reunion if I didn't."

  I opened the door and Pablo immediately poked his head to the front seat to give me wet and warm kisses.

  Remy put my bag in the trunk and climbed into the car.

  "I hope he's not trying to steal you away from me," he said, playfully pushing Pablo's face back.

  "Two guys fighting over me, I feel lucky."

  "You should," Remy said.

  He leaned in for a kiss. This time more passionate with his tongue flickering onto mine.

  He started the car and we drove with the windows down. I took in the fresh air in my lungs. It was my first time in this city and my first time in Canada. I was amazed by the prettiness of the streetlights than made everything glow yellow. A beautiful bridge spanned majestically across a canal.

  We sped down the highway that had few cars on it. Remy reached next to me and held my hand. I put my other hand out the window feeling the waves of air through my fingers.

  "Welcome to Halifax," Remy said.

  I smiled and squeezed his hand tight.

  I could see that Remy was more relaxed and confident like he was when I first met him in the coastal French town. He got his swagger back and I was glad he did. He was back to the person who I had dropped everything for to climb aboard his ship.

  We arrived at a diner that looked like it had been there for decades. Through the windows, I saw an old man sipping coffee and reading a book.

  We walked inside, and a lady behind the counter smiled and gestured for us to take a seat anywhere.

  We sat down in a booth in front of the car so we could keep an eye on Pablo.

  Both of us couldn't stop smiling at each other and seeing Remy smile made me smile even harder.

  "I can't believe, I'm here," I finally said. "What am I doing here?"

  "Well, knowing you, you came for an adventure," Remy said.

  "I'd love to explore this place, but I think this place might be a little different."

  "How so?" Remy asked.

  "Well, it feels like I might be here for a while, this place just seems a bit different than the rest."

  Remy
smirked without making a comment.

  The waiter came by and took our orders then brought over our drinks.

  "I have a surprise for you after this, I hope you're ready," Remy said.

  "Oh god, I'm going to throw up," I said.

  He laughed knowing I was joking.

  "Trust me, this one is a good surprise."

  21

  Remy

  I tried to keep my composure but deep down I was nervous as hell to show him the surprise. I ordered a burger and fries, and Mateo ordered chicken and waffles. I took a bite from my burger and had a few fries but I couldn't eat any more of it. I was too nervous.

  I paid and we headed back into the car. It was a cool night in late August. Summer was coming to an end, and being on the island made it long and short at the same time. In the car, I looked over at Mateo many times, each time I couldn't help but smile.

  It was surreal to be honest that he was here at all. Surreal that he came back to me. Surreal that he made a decision to come all the way to be with me.

  "Where are we going?" He asked in his voice that always made me weak in my knees.

  "You'll see," I said.

  We drove from the north end of the city through the suburban streets and mature trees. It was a Sunday, so it was quiet besides from some kids in the park. We drove towards the south of the city, the buildings were a bit taller and filled with more people.

  We passed by some bars where people were drinking and laughing, enjoying the last bit of summer. But this wasn't our stop. We went further down until we arrived at a parking lot near the dock.

  We got out, and I let Pablo out too. It was eerily quiet at this time of the night. The moon reflected white light onto the still waters. I held Mateo's hand and we walked onto the wooden boardwalk.

  I could see Mateo's eyes light up, taking in the beautiful view. He was confused why we stopped.

  "We're here," I said.

  Mateo raised his brows and tilted his head to the side.

  "Here... Where?" He asked.

  I turned my body to the side to face the ship docked next to us.

  He looked at it then back at me.

  "Still confused?" I asked.

  He nodded.

  I pulled his hand to walk on the steel ramp onto it, then onto the ship.

  Pablo followed with his tail wagging, though he was already familiar with it. We've been on it over the past couple weeks to get it ready.

  "This is your new ship?" Mateo asked.

  I nodded.

  "This ship, Janelle, belonged to my dad's friend who is retiring soon. When he heard what happened to us, he decided to give his ship to me. I was hesitant at first, not knowing if I wanted to sail ever again. I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life and I was scared to even be back in the water. But every day for the past couple weeks, I came here with Pablo to hang out. I miss the feeling of the waves rocking me back and forth. It was relaxing. I miss how powerful I felt being up at the helm looking out onto the world from that perspective. I miss how fun it was to operate the crane. I missed everything about it."

  "So do you think you're going to go out again to catch?" Mateo asked.

  "I've decided that it's the best thing to do," I said.

  "That's incredible!" Mateo said. "I'm so happy for you, and it's an amazing opportunity to go back out there and do what you love. I'm glad that you didn't let fear take over you. And I'm glad that you've rediscovered your passion."

  "I'm happy too," I said. "I haven't felt this good in a while. I know it feels right. Sometimes, I worry that things are going too well. It's too good to be true. Like being back on a boat, a boat that belongs to me. I'm back home and alive with my friends and family. You're here with me. I'm scared that it's going to get taken away from me again."

  "I worry about that too," Mateo said. "But I guess that's the thrill of living. The idea of not knowing what will happen next. I try not to think about it, just take it one step at a time. It's all you can do."

  "You're right. God, sometimes you sound wiser than me. Come on, let me show you the helm."

  I had one more surprise up my sleeve.

  We walked up the spiral stairs to the helm. I let Mateo sit in the captain's chair. In the helm, we could see a panoramic view of the city and the ocean.

  When Mateo swiveled his chair around, I was already on one knee with a small black box containing the ring. His jaw dropped and his reaction made me smile.

  "Mateo, I don't know a lot of things. I don't know what will happen tomorrow. I don't know how long you'll be here in Halifax. I don't know what you will say to this. But there's one thing I do know. It's knowing how good you make me feel. And I never want to lose that feeling ever. Mateo, will you marry me?"

  I saw a tear roll down his eyes and I was worried that he would say no. That it was all too sudden.

  But he dropped to his knees too and flung his arms around my shoulders wrapping them around my neck. I felt him nod with his face buried in my neck. I felt his warm tears.

  "Yes, of course I will. We've been through this much and I can't imagine spending my life with someone else."

  I took a deep breath, relieved. I held onto his hand and slipped the rose gold band onto his finger. Then pulled his teary-eyed face in for a gentle kiss.

  We retreated back down into the sleeping chamber. I had redecorated the main bedroom with white linens. The navy blue walls were painted white. The window was left ajar letting in the sea breeze. I closed the door behind us after Mateo walked in. He sunk deep into the new bed with his arms spanned across the width of it.

  I smiled and jumped on top of him, burying my face in his neck giving him warm wet kisses. His neck tasted of salt water and his sweet dewy scent that always lingered on the tip of my tongue making me want more.

  I peeled the white t-shirt off his back and kissed his nipples. They were like chocolates. He squirmed under my grip, letting out quiet moans, a bit ticklish like always.

  I pressed my hard-on against his thigh, and I could feel his on my thigh. My hands ran up the side of his ribs. Then onto his shoulders. Then down his arms.

  My hand interlocked with his. I could feel the rose gold ring I had placed on his finger earlier.

  Fuck.

  I was an engaged man, that idea made my body tingle with excitement. I let out a groan while unbuttoning his pants knowing that I'll get to do this forever until the end of time. I unbuttoned mine too and took them off.

  His lips pursed open almost begging for me to kiss him, so I did. I reached down under his briefs to stroke his hard cock, it was thicker and harder than I remembered. And suddenly the idea of having him inside me for the first time made my cock pulse faster than it had ever before.

  Mateo must have noticed because I felt him reach for it. Then his eyes widened and he tried to bend down to suck me but I stopped him.

  "What's wrong?" He asked.

  I shook my head.

  "Nothing, babe. It's just that you always suck my dick and I always fuck you. I want to reverse the roles this time."

  Mateo looked at me with his head tilted to the side.

  "You want me to fuck you?" He asked.

  I nodded and hearing him say that turned me on more than anything.

  "I didn't know you liked that," Mateo said.

  "I've never been fucked before to be honest, but I want you to be the first," I said.

  "Are you sure?"

  "Of course, I'm sure."

  I bent my head down, sucking his cock, tasting the sweetness of his precum on my tongue. I sucked him deep feeling his balls on my lips as I swirled my tongue on his shaft.

  I looked up at him and saw his hands rested behind his head enjoying every moment of it.

  I gave Mateo a kiss, then laid down on my back, and he knelt over me. His slim toned body turned me on so much, it was such a contrast from my thick muscular and hairy one. I grabbed onto the back of my thighs and exposed my ass. This position felt so weird, and I was so
vulnerable to him.

  Mateo sucked on his finger, then inserted it inside me. I felt a bit of pressure.

  "You're so fucking hairy," he moaned.

  "You like it?" I asked him.

  "I love it so much."

  I could see how much he was enjoying it by how hard he was.

  I reached in the bedside table drawer and grabbed a bottle of lube. I squirted it on my hand and used it to stroke his cock.

  I grabbed onto his shaft and guided it inside me. Inch by inch, I felt him enter inside. I bit my lip in pain. God, I don't know how anyone could do this, it hurt so much. But then I focused on Mateo's face and I put my hand on his chest feeling his racing heartbeat.