“Not at all,” he replied. “It was beautiful.”
“You sure?” she gently bit her lip.
“Yeah,” he smiled. “Kaori…” the wind lifted millions of white petals into the air. In a single moment, they were like snowflakes falling from the sky. Before he could he say another word, her knees gave out and her balance, lost. Fortunately he was there to catch her.
“Oh, sorry,” she said as he helped her stand steady on her feet. “Umm…” she uttered, unsure how to tell him that she’d already heard his thoughts.
“Kaori…” Ren said, wanting to vocalise them.
“Ren…” Kaori said, following his words.
“I’ll…”
“I’ll…”
“Fi—”
Before they could finish, the girl who had been standing in front of him, reciting the words they both thought, disappeared, leaving nothing behind.
“Kaori?” he whispered, realising that she was gone. The dancing petals all fell to the ground and the wind froze in place, leaving only behind an eerie silence. So quiet, it was as though every sound had been suspended.
“Hey, Kaori?” he said, looking around.
“I’ll find you,” he held his chin high. “I won’t forget, I promise,” his words gently dripped from his lips, however, something inside him didn’t agree.
“I won’t forget… I won’t forget, I won’t forget,” his head sunk as he tried to hammer it into his will, but something else resisted.
“I won’t forget!” he held his chest and fell to his knees, disturbing the bed of glistening petals.
“Please, don’t forget.” His withheld tears broke through their barricades and flooded his eyes, rushing down his face.
“Don’t forget, dammit!” He bent forward and his tears fell. Something inside told him it was inevitable.
Deep down, he knew it was impossible. He knew that the red string that bound him to her was… broken.
ChapteR 20
“Kaori,” the sound of her name subtly echoed in her ears as she awoke from her disturbed sleep.
“Kaori,” the faraway voice rang as she sat up on her bed and looked around at the familiar scenery, though it didn’t seem very recognisable when she first laid eyes on it.
“Huh?” Tears slowly trickling down her face. I’m crying? she thought, wiping them from her eyes. She stopped to look at the glimmering bead of sadness. What did I dream? she wondered, trying to recall the far-off memory. However, it seemed impossible, all that was left behind was an aching in her chest, telling her that she lost something. Something important to her, but no matter how much she tried, that something was never remembered, even though the feeling lingered.
“Kaori,” Aiko’s voice became significantly more clear and less distant. “Kaori!” she said once more and after a second of silence, the door to the room was slid open. “Good, you’re awake,” she said looking at Kaori, who wore a blank expression that could only communicate her deep confusion and sorrow. “Did something happen?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.
“I don’t know,” Kaori replied, looking down at the finger that steadily held her tear of liquid grief.
“Mmm… you have your concert today, right?” Aiko cocked her head to the right.
“Uh-huh, it’s today,” Kaori nodded, still not fully aware of the predicament she was in.
“Don’t you need to get ready?”
“Get ready—” Kaori repeated, finally putting two and two together. Her eyes grew wide and her thoughts, overridden with panic. “I need to get ready!” she jumped out of bed and ran passed her mother and disappeared into the bathroom.
“That’s the reaction I was looking for,” Aiko murmured. “Breakfast is on the table!” she announced.
“Thank you!” Kaori replied.
She halved her morning routine time and appeared in the kitchen wearing her uniform, but as a result to her rushing, her hair was more of a train wreck than usual.
“Good morning,” she sat down in front of her mother, who had already started eating.
Aiko smiled. “Excited for today?” she asked, watching her daughter eat the breakfast she had laid out for her.
“As much as I’ll ever be,” Kaori replied.
“I’ll be there, okay,” Aiko said. “It’s at one, right?”
“Yeah,” Kaori said, mowing down her food.
“Will your boyfriend be there?” Aiko asked, looking mischievously at her.
Her throat quickly grew thick and she began coughing.
“Don’t die,” Aiko said with wide eyes.
“I don’t have a boyfriend!” Kaori retaliated, after clearing her throat.
“Okay, will the boy, you’re having rather implicating dreams about, be there?” Aiko teased.
“I don’t have time for this!” Kaori exclaimed, quickly getting up from the table.
Before she could begin to clear her dishes, her mother said, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll fix this.”
“Thank you,” Kaori said, smiling at her. “Thank you for breakfast too!” she added and walked into her room to brush the disaster of a hair day into near perfection. After assembling all her things needed, her sheet music, shoes, a red ribbon used to tie her hair up, and a few general items for school, she walked up to the door, ready to leave. “I forgot something…” she bit her lip. There was something, she couldn’t tell what it was.
“Probably this,” Aiko said, appearing in the hallway, holding a black garment bag.
“Right, the dress…” Kaori uttered, realising that that was the one thing that she’d failed to pick up. “Thank you,” she said, accepting the bag from her mother.
“Have fun, I’ll see you at one,” Aiko said, waving goodbye to her daughter.
“Bye!” Kaori exclaimed, closing the apartment door behind her.
She jogged the route to school. When she reached the crossing, it was empty—not single student stood there. It clicked in her head. She was later than initially expected. Her pace quickly increased and the feeling of loss remained, underneath blankets of stress and worry.
Fortunately, she arrived in one piece at the school auditorium where she saw her classmate, backstage. She quickly approached her after catching her breath.
“Kaori!” Nora said, noticing the girl walking towards her.
“I made it,” Kaori uttered.
“Were you running?” Nora asked.
“Yeah, all the way,” Kaori replied, finally getting a grip on her breathing. “So, where’s Mei?”
“She’s rounding up the concert band and orchestra members, before we have one final rehearsal run,” Nora explained. “On a side note, it seems like the rest of us are here.”
The backstage halls were filled with student performers and student organisers. Nora seemed to be quite well informed. When she spoke, the other students all heeded her words as though she had absolute authority.
“Excuse me,” a familiar voice uttered. “Coming through!” It became obvious that it was Mei’s voice as she marched with a battalion of musicians behind her, all armed with their instruments. “Nora! Where do you want us?” Mei held her head high, with a wide grin.
“Concert band on stage, orchestra on standby,” Nora replied and Mei did as she was told with flawless finesse.
It only took a second for the band to be seated and ready to play, with Mrs Taki as the concert band conductor. She stood assertive in front of the band, wearing a black tailcoat with a white shirt underneath, along with matching pants and black shoes. Her shoulders remained relaxed as she awaited Nora’s signal. When she gave it, the teacher’s arms rose, with the conductor’s baton in hand and the readiness of her ensemble, to command the tuning of b-flat.
The wind symphony did as she demanded, with a section leader playing the note and every other member of the band following. Without saying a word, Mrs Taki commanded a close and the students heeded without fail.
“Now we’re ready,” she said, smiling at her pupils. As her words dissolved
into the air, she lifted her arms once more and awaited everybody to be ready to begin. It only took a second. After the short delay, her arms moved and zeal filled her body as she commanded her symphony to follow her every call and to produce music fit for the score it entailed.
The band, in perfect harmony, created a flourishing, dynamic tune that filled the empty auditorium with its beauty. They performed only two songs and then allowed the string orchestra to take their place on stage with the same teacher as the conductor.
The different acts rehearsed one after another, some comedic, but most musical. The performances were scheduled as the audience appeared in the concert hall. They took their seats in front of the empty stage. The huge auditorium was soon completely packed with friends and family.
Underneath the powerful ceiling lights and the parted curtains, the host walked out, Nora. She stood in front of every face seated in the hall. She performed a feat praiseworthy all on her own.
The performances of the bands, duos and soloists began with the concert band taking the lead. Among the silence of seated family members, one was missing—Aiko—but fortunately, she appeared, taking an empty seat next to the aisle.
She opened the little leaflet showcasing the schedule of the concert with the faces of the students performing next to each act. Those with dozens of members were given a nice group photo, while the duos and soloists were given portraits.
“It’s time to see what our little girl is made of, Kousei,” she murmured to herself as she looked at the picture of the girl who was to perform the original song ‘Till we never part’.
The girl in question sat on the floor in the backstage corridor, dressed in a flawless black gown. Her knees were comfortable, curled up to her chest, hiding her shaking hands and her ashen face.
“Kaori, it’s going to be your turn soon,” Mei said, squatting down to the girl overcome with anxiety. “Are you okay?” she asked, noticing how pale Kaori was.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Kaori uttered an obvious lie and slowly rose from the floor with Mei’s help.
“Are you sure?” Mei said, worrying about her as she realised that the girl could barely stand on her own.
“Yeah, yeah,” Kaori replied. “I just need to get to the piano and I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure you can get there by yourself?” Mei persisted.
“Yeah,” Kaori said. I won’t be by myself, she thought.
She walked towards the backstage doors that lead to the stage, one nerve-wracking step at a time.
Her thoughts raced and her weakened muscles were barely able to carry her weight, but one comforting thought, or rather, a hope, kept her anxiety from undoing her.
Ren? Are you there?
ChapteR 21
Ren sat up on his bed. His chest was tight and every breath was a struggle. It was like a dagger had pierced his throat and twisted with each inhalation. The sharpness of the air tore through his windpipe, so much so that he wanted to stop breathing.
A pair of tears ran down his face. The manifestation of his sorrow was captured on the liquid bead he wiped from his cheeks. Huh? He looked at the strange tear, wondering why it dripped from his eyes. He stared at it, trying to remember the dream that was probably responsible, but it was impossible. He tried to revisit the instance by watching the scenes that he remembered, but the most important ones were all blurred and distorted.
What did I dream? He refused to give up. The only thing that was certain was the heart-choking feeling that weakened his muscles and numbed his senses. The aching in his chest was the only clue, he had, in order to deduce what had taken place in his dream.
He shifted and sat on the edge of the bed, still possessed by the strange feeling. As his muscles moved, every contraction and stretch were remarkably slow and sluggish. Apathy had swallowed his zeal and left him only with the sickening sensation of grief and the only thought he was allowed was, What did I lose?
He rose to his feet and began a listless version of his morning routine.
“Ren?” Kena exclaimed from the hallway. “Ren?” she said again, hearing no response from the boy in question. “Ren?” she uttered, slowly opening the door into his room. What she found was a boy with a zombie-like posture and eyes that looked like they had seen death itself.
“Good morning,” Ren said, trying to front a smile.
“Good morning…” Kena frowned and stepped back. “Breakfast is ready,” she said, turning from him and marching back to the kitchen.
“Thank you…” he murmured, lumbering his body after.
“Good morning,” his parents uttered. He responded with a weak wave and sat down in front of them.
In silence, he served himself a smaller than usual portion of breakfast and quickly forced the food down.
“Ren?” Hima said, noticing the bags under his eyes.
“Yeah,” Ren replied.
“Are you feeling okay?” she asked, leaning forward to feel his forehead.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” he replied, trying his best to sell the lie that escaped his lips.
“Ren, is something bothering you?” Gin asked, narrowing his eyes on his son.
“Nothing new, I guess,” said Ren, but this time trying to be more convincing.
“Are you sure everything is alright?” Kena said, tilting herself away from her brother.
“Yeah, really, don’t worry about it,” he explained, finishing off the tiny portion that he had served himself. He rose from the table with his dishes. “I have half day at school today, so I’ll probably be home earlier, unless I go to a school festival or two,” he explained, fronting a weak smile at his family.
“Okay, sounds good,” Gin sighed, knowing that they weren’t being told the truth.
Ren disappeared from the kitchen leaving his family in silence as they wondered what plagued him. In his room, he lugged himself around and got ready. Shortly after, he appeared in the hall, quietly wearing his shoes and leaving the apartment and his sister behind.
“Did he go?” Kena asked, just about to finish breakfast.
“Ren?” Hima said, but no one answered.
“Ah, don’t worry, I’ll catch up with him!” Kena chanted and quickly jolted out of the kitchen, grabbing everything she needed for school.
“I’m going!” she said, waving to her parents as she left the apartment. With her school bag nicely fastened on her back, she ran for a little bit until she saw a boy who was without a doubt her brother. Instead of approaching him, she remained a couple of steps behind him, watching him slowly walk to the station. He had a weak posture and his feet seemed heavier than usual. It was like his limbs were stiff and stubborn, almost like they couldn’t be bothered to move or it was a hassle to move them. His shoulders dropped and his arms hung. His eyes were low, like nothing ahead interested him.
She remained on her brother’s tail and refused to get any closer, even at the train station when they stood waiting for the same train that they always did. She kept her distance, with her eyes focused on him. She studied his every subtle movement and any change in expression, even if it was just a twitch. She frowned, hoping that she could figure out what it was that was bothering him so. When they entered the train, nothing changed, his sombreness remained as though he was being haunted.
In the train, however, he sought tranquillity in the moving scenery. For a moment, a soft smile appeared on his face. It was as though he was looking beyond what initially met the eyes and glanced at a far-off scene that no naked lens could see. His gaze was soft and patient as if he didn’t expect to find anything. However, his blank expression somehow seemed… hopeful.
Kena’s stop arrived and she was forced to leave the train, forced to leave her brother, putting an end to her investigation and study. The boy who stood, glued to the skyline that had been laced with the light of the sun entertained a single thought as a result of his longing. I’m looking for something, I don’t know what…or someone, I don’t know who…
Th
e feeling that possessed him from the very first waking moment of the day, somehow urged him to regret that he had awoken from the dream that left such an effect lingering so deeply in his chest. When his stop finally came, he left the train and slowly walked to school, taking note of nothing around him.
“Ren?” Maves said, increasing his pace to match his friend in front of him; however, the bubble that enveloped Ren remained intact.
“Ren?” Maves said again, but still failed to dent the delicate sphere. “Ren, are you feeling alright?” he uttered, giving the boy a small nudge.
“Oh sorry,” Ren finally replied, realising that Maves was talking to him.
“Are you feeling okay?”
“Yeah, I was just spacing out,” Ren replied.
“Thinking about your dream girl?”
“Not today.”
“Something else on your mind?”
“Something like that.”
The pair chatted a little bit on their way to school. They met Tanford at their shoe lockers. After their short exchange, they made their way to class. They seated themselves down and continued their trivial conversations about the homework and the schedule that they had for the day.
Ren participated relatively little in the conversation and remained quiet as he retrieved his notebook from his bag. The usual interest and vigour that compelled him to pull up the pad was gone, leaving the apathetic artist to wallow in his emptiness.
He looked at his latest illustration, the one which had an actual effect on him. It had dug deep, drawing out a reaction, but now, now there was nothing. All that remained were the colourless eyeballs captured in the image and his ignorance of the passion that had gone into every graphite stroke and line.
“Planning on drawing something new?” Maves asked, looking at the hollow boy turning to a new open page. The artist, who had produced the work on the page before had carried so much sentiment and warmth, was a totally different person from the boy who was seated in front of him.
“Ren, are you feeling alright?” Tanford asked, before Ren could answer the first question.
String Theory Page 10