by Prenisha Aja
But who was I kidding? I shouldn’t even be thinking this far ahead when I really hadn’t squared everything away with Troy, who may I add was still calling and begging for me to give him another chance.
Don’t get me wrong, I left him for a reason. And yes, I was enjoying myself, but I also knew that sometimes it was easier to go back to what you were comfortable with, even if that meant dealing with unhappiness.
“Ok Mommy, love you,” Sai’ replied.
“Love you too. Give Daddy the phone.”
Sai’ handed Sawyer the phone and I looked at him intensely, waiting to see what was about to happen next.
“What you want Kelia?” he calmly asked her, but his serious facial expression would make a normal person proceed with caution but of course, she didn’t get the picture.
“I just know you ain’t have a bitch around my child?” she spat.
“Man, don’t you be having that peon ass nigga around my son? So please spare me this dumb ass conversation because real shit, I don’t want to hear it. The last thing I need right now is you fucking up my mood. Get off my line with this drama and call and check up on yo’ nigga whom I knocked out,” Sawyer read her ass from top to bottom before he hung up the phone in her face.
“Sorry about that man,” he apologized, but he didn’t have to.
“It’s all good.” I smiled at him and he gave me a cool ass head nod, before the music began to play again and we headed to drop me off at home first.
Pulling up to my house, there was an unknown car in the parking lot. I didn’t know if it was my parents having company or what, but this nagging feeling that disturbed my sprit was telling me otherwise.
I almost didn’t want to get out of the car. Sighing heavily, I tucked my hair behind my ears and stared at the car as if the name of the person that was driving it would magically appear.
“You good?” Sawyer placed his hand on my thigh, and I didn’t know why but I jumped.
“I think so. I’ll call you once I get settled and stuff,” I let him know as I turned and grabbed for the door handle.
“You do know you can come back with me and go work on that baby.” He winked at me, but I wasn’t in the mood.
Why? Because something told me that was Troy who was driving that car. The one person that I had been trying to avoid. However, I knew all the calling he was doing again and the certain way he would phrase the text messages he had sent me, let me know that he wasn’t going to just give up on us. Did I know he would fly to Texas to get me back? No.
“I’ll call you ok,” I said lowly as I leaned over and pecked him on the cheek.
I then got out of the car and before heading towards the house, I turned gave Sawyer a big smile followed by a wave. I watched him drive off and I began to slowly walk up the sidewalk.
Peeking inside of the car and seeing nobody inside, I finished making my way to the front door. Once I reached the door, I breathed in deeply then twisted the doorknob and entered the house.
Sitting on the sofa was Troy, and when he saw me, he leapt to his feet and came running towards me. I raised my hand to halt him.
“What are you doing here?” I asked him in annoyance.
“Same thing I want to know,” my mother mumbled under her breath. It was no secret; she didn’t like him.
“Janice, let them talk it out. Come on,” my father called for my mother, and she looked at him with the evilest stare before she got up and stormed past him.
She was cursing and mumbling under her breath and I knew once they were far enough away from us, she was going to give my father the business.
“What do you mean what am I doing here? I came here for you,” he replied.
Even though I had only been away from home for a few weeks, it felt like months. I was actually enjoying myself, and looking at him right now was reminding me why I left.
“But what if I don’t want to go back with you? I didn’t tell you to fly down here. Don’t you have work?” I questioned, because that’s where he should have been.
Not here in Texas, stalking me and disturbing my peace.
“Come on Brynlee, I’m sorry baby. I swear to God I’m sorry. I wish that I can take all that shit back that I said and did. I swear I have been sick since you left me baby. Please don’t give up on us. Don’t let all these years we shared together go to waste. I love you.” He dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around my waist, laying his head on my stomach.
“Troy, I don’t know…” I sighed as a wave of emotions began to rain over me.
I was now standing here confused. I didn’t know what to do. I was so conflicted because Troy was right. Why would I let all those years go? No, they weren’t all bad because if that was the case, I would have never said yes when he dropped down on one knee and asked me to marry him.
“Brynlee baby, please. Don’t leave me. Without you, I am not half the man I am when I’m with you. Baby, please,” he begged as he lifted his head, and I could see his eyes glossy and it hurt.
I had never seen Troy this vulnerable and this emotional. The way he was begging for me to come back had weakened the tough shell that I had protecting me from letting my feelings for him show. He had won me over and I began to cry.
I dropped to my knees and wrapped my hands around his neck, and we cried together. “I’m sorry for hurting you baby. Let’s go back home and get our shit right,” he whispered into my ear.
“Ok.” I smiled as he kissed me on the lips and began to pull something out of his pocket.
“Put this on and don’t ever take it back off,” he demanded, and I held my hand out so that he could place the ring back on my finger.
I wiped the tears away and embraced Troy. I couldn’t say I didn’t miss him, because I did. For years Troy was all I’d ever known, and I felt like it would be stupid for me to give it all up, just because my feelings were hurt and I was thinking irrationally.
It was now midnight as I was lying next to Troy in his hotel bed. He was knocked out cold. However, sleep was the last thing on my mind.
Here I was laying back next to the guy I left, thinking about the guy who had managed to bring sunshine back into my life in a matter of weeks.
As I laid here, staring up at the ceiling, I smiled thinking about him, Sawyer. I then began to think about how he would feel knowing that I had just up and left him without letting him know, but I didn’t know how to tell him such a thing.
With so much on my mind and not being able to think, I got out of bed and grabbed my phone. I had no clue if Merci was up, but I was about to call her because I needed to talk to her. I needed to vent. I had already talked to my mother and she didn’t agree with my decision. She had told me that I would regret going back to Troy, but I still left out of her house with my suitcase and got into the car with him.
Dialing Merci’s number, I eased into the bathroom and sat on the toilet as I waited for her to answer.
“Hello,” her raspy voice answered, and I could tell that I had waken her up out of her sleep.
“Hey, you sleep?”
“I was but not no more. What’s up boo, you good?” she asked me, and I could hear movement on her end and then a door closed.
“No, Merci, I’m not. I’m so confused right now,” I cried as I held the phone to my ear and looked down at the tile floor.
“What is it?” she asked, concerned. “Is it Sawyer? What he do?”
“That’s the thing. He hasn’t done anything, he is perfect but…” I trailed off, as I began to fall deep into my own thoughts.
I began to think about Troy and how things ended so badly. Then I began to think about Sawyer…
“Brynlee, what is it?” Merci yelled my name causing me to jump.
“Troy is here, and he talked me into going back to New York with him.” I exhaled as I sat with my head down.
“Wow, you gotta be stupid,” Merci bluntly stated, causing me to jerk my head back and to feel a certain type of way. I was now regretting ca
lling her.
“Well tell me how you really fucking feel,” I said with an attitude.
“I am Bryn, you stupid. Real stupid. Don’t let your emotions cloud your judgement but it’s whatever you want to do. Just know, the problems y’all are having aren’t fixed. Y’all haven’t even tried to heal from it so make sure you are prepared to be burned again,” she let me know.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
“Baby, you ok in there?” Troy asked from the other side of the door.
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute.”
“Tuh. I just can’t,” Merci added.
“Look Merci, I called you to vent not for you to make me feel even more like shit. Maybe this time we will be able to heal from it and grow together. Shit, maybe even have a baby this go ‘round, but I will talk to you later.” I hung up the phone in her face and left out of the bathroom.
I jumped into the bed and snuggled up under Troy as he wrapped his arms around me and buried his head against my shoulder.
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too,” I replied.
Troy snuggled up closer to me and before I knew it, was back snoring and sleeping like a baby as for me, I laid there as tears fell from my eyes and soaked the white, satin pillowcase.
17
Merci
It had been about three weeks since I had heard from Brynlee. I hated that our phone call ended how it did. I felt bad for being so blunt and rude to her about her situation. It was just that I knew my friend deserved better. To be real, Troy wasn’t even her type.
She went off to college and changed everything about herself.
Sighing, I sat up on my bed as I tried to call Brynlee for the umpteenth time with hopes that she would hear me out and let me apologize. Nevertheless, when Brynlee was mad, she would turn cold and block you all the way out.
Shaking my head, I checked my text messages and smiled as I looked at Greyson’s text.
He and I had been talking since the second time we met up at the park. He was so cool, calm and collected. He and I had been taking things slow just because I didn’t want to rush into anything with him and then later regret it. I didn’t want to run into the same issue I had with Nix because I had moved too fast, been blinded by his good looks and bomb dick.
With Greyson, or should I just call him Grey like everyone else, I wanted to go about it all differently and so far, I was.
Grey: Hey pretty lady, what you up to?
I smiled as I read over his text message again. He was sweet but was still a hood nigga, which I loved about him.
I was never one to try and run to a goodie-two-shoes guy. That wasn’t my type and I would never be like Brynlee and pretend it was.
That’s why when she met Sawyer, she was magnetic to his hood, bad boy aura. No matter how she might try to downplay it. She liked him.
How I know? Because I eyed them the whole night in the club. The way she effortlessly was able to be herself with him, within just a few hours, let me know Brynlee was attracted to him.
Hell, I would forever rep my hood. There was no running away from it. I loved my people. Yes, I wanted better, but I would never run to a whole new state trying to escape where I grew up at, because they always showed me love.
Texting Grey back, I got up and got dressed so that I could get my day started. I had a few clubs to check and a few items I needed to pick up to make sure that the events I had scheduled would be good to go. So, with having to do all of that, I knew I was going to have to cut out my morning run today.
Now that I was done getting ready, I headed out the door, and down to my car. My phone dinged again and of course it was Grey. I’m pretty sure I looked like a damn fool smiling so hard at seeing his name again.
Grey: Can you stop by the studio? I need to holla at you ‘bout some shit.
Hum, I wondered what he wanted to talk to me about. Looking down at my watch, I checked the time. I decided to still handle a few of my errands before I passed them over to my assistant to finish them.
Quickly texting him back, I asked for his location and told him it would be a few hours before I arrived.
Finally, after handling my business first, I was now on my way to Greyson. I was a little nervous. He and I had been talking on the phone and texting, but we hadn’t really spent time together, unless you wanted to count the times we would meet up and run together but other than that, it had just been over the phone.
Pulling up to the nice building, I parked and sat there so I could get myself together. I let the mirror down and fixed my hair, adjusted my shirt and placed some Carmex on my lips just to give them an extra shine. I also popped a piece of gum in my mouth, grabbed my keys out of the ignition and got out the car.
I felt cute in a pair of yellow, high-waisted shorts, a black crop top that laced up in the back and a pair of black heels. I was also wearing my favorite black, gold chain purse from Chanel. I wasn’t dressed over the top or anything, but I just felt the need to always be cute, especially when I handled business. It was just important to me for me to always look like a businesswoman so I would be approached as one.
Just imagine walking into somewhere with Nike shoes on, jeans and a random blouse, looking like you were making a grocery store run. I felt like nobody would take me seriously and would look at me as a joke, so I always came looking like a winner and for the most part, I won.
Stepping through the glass door, I walked around and looked around at the pictures in frames of different celebrities.
“Hello, how may I help you?” this pretty light skin chick questioned as she wore a big, bright smile and long, black hair.
“Yes, I’m looking for Grey...I mean Greyson,” I replied, and she smiled and directed me to where he was.
“Take the elevator up, go to the second floor and he and the boys will be in the room on the right,” she informed me.
“Thank you.” I smiled and then waved goodbye, as I made my way to the elevator.
Once I reached the floor, I stumbled out and followed her exact directions. When I reached the door, I could hear the music. I pulled my phone out and sent him a text to let him know I was outside of the door.
When Grey opened the door, a cloud of smoke escaped and smacked me right in the face. Waving the smoke out of my face, I was now able to take in all 6’3 inches of this man.
“My bad ma.” He smiled.
“You good, so what’s up?” I asked him as we stood there sizing each other up.
“Oh shit, come in.” He shook his head as he stretched the door open wider with his long arms and I entered the studio to see a few people sitting around.
The only one that I knew of was Sawyer, the rest I wasn’t too familiar with.
“Aye, this Spiff, Dock and of course you should know my nigga Sawyer.” Everyone gave me a head nod or a what’s up, but Sawyer.
I hope that he wasn’t holding some type of grudge against me for how Brynlee just up and left and didn’t let him know a damn thing.
“Don’t pay attention to his ass, he been in a mood.” He shrugged and Sawyer turned around and flipped Grey off.
“Nigga, how about you keep drinking that Ginger Ale, so you don’t be around this bitch throwing yo’ guts up again,” he joked with him which caused Sawyer to mug the fuck out of him, but he didn’t say nothing.
Instead, he picked up the red plastic cup and took a sip from it then sat it back down. Grey chuckled softly next to me as we made our way through the group of men.
There was a separate door that was connected to where they were recording at, but it wasn’t as loud. There was small square table and about three chairs. The room reminded me of an integration room, and I felt like he was about to sit my ass down and ask me hella questions.
Grey pulled one of the chairs out for me and I sat down. He then scooted a chair close to me and sat down also.
“Uhm, so…” I twiddled my fingers together and looked around the room as I waited for Grey to start ta
lking and at least let me know what the hell he wanted.
“Alright, so check it. I wanted to throw my nigga Luca a lil’ surprise get together. Shit, I was even thinking about that one club we had Sawyer’s event at,” he expressed to me.
“Where y’all got shot up at?” I asked as my brows scrunched up and looked at him, curious to know if we were on the same page.
Like, why would he want to have another event there? Yeah, it was a hot club but after being shot at, why go back there again?
“Hell yeah, fuck them niggas. They’re not running us away from shit. Next time though, we gon’ be ready and we decided to beef up the security.”
“Ok, if you say so, I just have to stop by the club and talk to the owner.” I sighed and ran my hand down the side of face and gently rubbed my temple.
“Alright bet, so when can we start getting the shit together?” he questioned me.
“When is his birthday?” I asked.
“This weekend.”
“What? That is not enough time,” I sat straight up and expressed.
I needed at least two weeks to get everything ready, and who’s to say that the club wasn’t booked up or something? These types of things needed to be set in stone a few weeks before the event just in case something happened.
“Yes, it is and I’m going to help yo’ ass out. So, get yo’ ass up so we can head over to the club and let the owner know.” He stood to his feet and held his hand out.
Shaking my head, I grabbed his hand and rose from the chair. Grey pulled me close to him and stared into my eyes. He was so much taller than me, but I loved it.
He eased his hands around my waist and slowly caressed up my back then back down. Once he reached my ass, he gripped it firmly. His hands were so huge they damn near covered my ass. I wasn’t one of those thick booty chicks, but I had enough, and it jiggled when I walked away.
“Merci,” he lowly mumbled my name as he began to close in the space between us.