The Great Hoggarty Diamond

by William Makepeace Thackeray

mine has a sick wife and nine young children: he is himself a sick

  man, and his tenure of life is feeble; he has earned money, sir, in

  my service--sixty pounds and more--it is all his children have to

  look to--all: but for that, in the event of his death, they would

  be houseless beggars in the street. And what have I done for that

  family, sir? I have put that money out of the reach of Robert

  Gates, and placed it so that it shall be a blessing to his family

  at his death. Every farthing is invested in shares in this office;

  and Robert Gates, my lodge-porter, is a holder of three shares in

  the West Diddlesex Association, and, in that capacity, your master

  and mine. Do you think I want to CHEAT Gates?"

  "Oh, sir!" says I.

  "To cheat that poor helpless man, and those tender innocent

  children!--you can't think so, sir; I should be a disgrace to human

  nature if I did. But what boots all my energy and perseverance?

  What though I place my friends' money, my family's money, my own

  money--my hopes, wishes, desires, ambitions--all upon this

  enterprise? You young men will not do so. You, whom I treat with

  love and confidence as my children, make no return to me. When I

  toil, you remain still; when I struggle, you look on. Say the word

  at once,--you doubt me! O heavens, that this should be the reward

  of all my care and love for you!"

  Here Mr. Brough was so affected that he actually burst into tears,

  and I confess I saw in its true light the negligence of which I had

  been guilty.

  "Sir," says I, "I am very--very sorry: it was a matter of

  delicacy, rather than otherwise, which induced me not to speak to

  my aunt about the West Diddlesex."

  "Delicacy, my dear dear boy--as if there can be any delicacy about

  making your aunt's fortune! Say indifference to me, say

  ingratitude, say folly,--but don't say delicacy--no, no, not

  delicacy. Be honest, my boy, and call things by their right names-

  -always do."

  "It WAS folly and ingratitude, Mr. Brough," says I: "I see it all

  now; and I'll write to my aunt this very post."

  "You had better do no such thing," says Brough, bitterly: "the

  stocks are at ninety, and Mrs. Hoggarty can get three per cent. for

  her money."

  "I WILL write, sir,--upon my word and honour, I will write."

  "Well, as your honour is passed, you must, I suppose; for never

  break your word--no, not in a trifle, Titmarsh. Send me up the

  letter when you have done, and I'll frank it--upon my word and

  honour I will," says Mr. Brough, laughing, and holding out his hand

  to me.

  I took it, and he pressed mine very kindly--"You may as well sit

  down here," says he, as he kept hold of it; "there is plenty of

  paper."

  And so I sat down and mended a beautiful pen, and began and wrote,

  "Independent West Diddlesex Association, June 1822," and "My dear

  Aunt," in the best manner possible. Then I paused a little,

  thinking what I should next say; for I have always found that

  difficulty about letters. The date and My dear So-and-so one

  writes off immediately--it is the next part which is hard; and I

  put my pen in my mouth, flung myself back in my chair, and began to

  think about it.

  "Bah!" said Brough, "are you going to be about this letter all day,

  my good fellow? Listen to me, and I'll dictate to you in a

  moment." So he began:-

  "My Dear Aunt,--Since my return from Somersetshire, I am very happy

  indeed to tell you that I have so pleased the managing director of

  our Association and the Board, that they have been good enough to

  appoint me third clerk--"

  "Sir!" says I.

  "Write what I say. Mr. Roundhand, as has been agreed by the board

  yesterday, quits the clerk's desk and takes the title of secretary

  and actuary. Mr. Highmore takes his place; Mr. Abednego follows

  him; and I place you as third clerk--as

  "third clerk (write), with a salary of a hundred and fifty pounds

  per annum. This news will, I know, gratify my dear mother and you,

  who have been a second mother to me all my life.

  "When I was last at home, I remember you consulted me as to the

  best mode of laying out a sum of money which was lying useless in

  your banker's hands. I have since lost no opportunity of gaining

  what information I could: and situated here as I am, in the very

  midst of affairs, I believe, although very young, I am as good a

  person to apply to as many others of greater age and standing.

  "I frequently thought of mentioning to you our Association, but

  feelings of delicacy prevented me from doing so. I did not wish

  that anyone should suppose that a shadow of self-interest could

  move me in any way.

  "But I believe, without any sort of doubt, that the West Diddlesex

  Association offers the best security that you can expect for your

  capital, and, at the same time, the highest interest you can

  anywhere procure.

  "The situation of the Company, as I have it from THE VERY BEST

  AUTHORITY (underline that), is as follows:-

  "The subscribed and bona fide capital is FIVE MILLIONS STERLING.

  "The body of directors you know. Suffice it to say that the

  managing director is John Brough, Esq., of the firm of Brough and

  Hoff, a Member of Parliament, and a man as well known as Mr.

  Rothschild in the City of London. His private fortune, I know for

  a fact, amounts to half a million; and the last dividends paid to

  the shareholders of the I. W. D. Association amounted to 6.125 per

  cent. per annum."

  [That I know was the dividend declared by us.]

  "Although the shares in the market are at a very great premium, it

  is the privilege of the four first clerks to dispose of a certain

  number, 5,000L. each at par; and if you, my dearest aunt, would

  wish for 2,500L. worth, I hope you will allow me to oblige you by

  offering you so much of my new privileges.

  "Let me hear from you immediately upon the subject, as I have

  already an offer for the whole amount of my shares at market

  price."

  "But I haven't, sir," says I.

  "You have, sir. I will take the shares; but I want YOU. I want as

  many respectable persons in the Company as I can bring. I want you

  because I like you, and I don't mind telling you that I have views

  of my own as well; for I am an honest man and say openly what I

  mean, and I'll tell you WHY I want you. I can't, by the

  regulations of the Company, have more than a certain number of

  votes, but if your aunt takes shares, I expect--I don't mind owning

  it--that she will vote with me. NOW do you understand me? My

  object is to be all in all with the Company; and if I be, I will

  make it the most glorious enterprise that ever was conducted in the

  City of London."

  So I signed the letter and left it with Mr. B. to frank.

  The next day I went and took my place at the third clerk's desk,

  being led to it by Mr. B., who made a speech to the gents, much to

  the annoyance of the other chaps, who grumbled about their
/>
  services: though, as for the matter of that, our services were

  very much alike: the Company was only three years old, and the

  oldest clerk in it had not six months' more standing in it than I.

  "Look out," said that envious M'Whirter to me. "Have you got

  money, or have any of your relations money? or are any of them

  going to put it into the concern?"

  I did not think fit to answer him, but took a pinch out of his

  mull, and was always kind to him; and he, to say the truth, was

  always most civil to me. As for Gus Hoskins, he began to think I

  was a superior being; and I must say that the rest of the chaps

  behaved very kindly in the matter, and said that if one man were to

  be put over their heads before another, they would have pitched

  upon me, for I had never harmed any of them, and done little

  kindnesses to several.

  "I know," says Abednego, "how you got the place. It was I who got

  it you. I told Brough you were a cousin of Preston's, the Lord of

  the Treasury, had venison from him and all that; and depend upon it

  he expects that you will be able to do him some good in that

  quarter."

  I think there was some likelihood in what Abednego said, because

  our governor, as we called him, frequently spoke to me about my

  cousin; told me to push the concern in the West End of the town,

  get as many noblemen as we could to insure with us, and so on. It

  was in vain I said I could do nothing with Mr. Preston. "Bah!

  bah!" says Mr. Brough, "don't tell ME. People don't send haunches

  of venison to you for nothing;" and I'm convinced he thought I was

  a very cautious prudent fellow, for not bragging about my great

  family, and keeping my connection with them a secret. To be sure

  he might have learned the truth from Gus, who lived with me; but

  Gus would insist that I was hand in glove with all the nobility,

  and boasted about me ten times as much as I did myself.

  The chaps used to call me the "West Ender."

  "See," thought I, "what I have gained by Aunt Hoggarty giving me a

  diamond-pin! What a lucky thing it is that she did not give me the

  money, as I hoped she would! Had I not had the pin--had I even

  taken it to any other person but Mr. Polonius, Lady Drum would

  never have noticed me; had Lady Drum never noticed me, Mr. Brough

  never would, and I never should have been third clerk of the West

  Diddlesex."

  I took heart at all this, and wrote off on the very evening of my

  appointment to my dearest Mary Smith, giving her warning that a

  "certain event," for which one of us was longing very earnestly,

  might come off sooner than we had expected. And why not? Miss

  S.'s own fortune was 70L. a year, mine was 150L., and when we had

  300L., we always vowed we would marry. "Ah!" thought I, "if I

  could but go to Somersetshire now, I might boldly walk up to old

  Smith's door" (he was her grandfather, and a half-pay lieutenant of

  the navy), "I might knock at the knocker and see my beloved Mary in

  the parlour, and not be obliged to sneak behind hayricks on the

  look-out for her, or pelt stones at midnight at her window."

  My aunt, in a few days, wrote a pretty gracious reply to my letter.

  She had not determined, she said, as to the manner in which she

  should employ her three thousand pounds, but should take my offer

  into consideration; begging me to keep my shares open for a little

  while, until her mind was made up.

  What, then, does Mr. Brough do? I learned afterwards, in the year

  1830, when he and the West Diddlesex Association had disappeared

  altogether, how he had proceeded.

  "Who are the attorneys at Slopperton?" says he to me in a careless

  way.

  "Mr. Ruck, sir," says I, "is the Tory solicitor, and Messrs. Hodge

  and Smithers the Liberals." I knew them very well, for the fact

  is, before Mary Smith came to live in our parts, I was rather

  partial to Miss Hodge, and her great gold-coloured ringlets; but

  Mary came and soon put HER nose out of joint, as the saying is.

  "And you are of what politics?"

  "Why, sir, we are Liberals." I was rather ashamed of this, for Mr.

  Brough was an out-and-out Tory; but Hodge and Smithers is a most

  respectable firm. I brought up a packet from them to Hickson,

  Dixon, Paxton, and Jackson, OUR solicitors, who are their London

  correspondents.

  Mr. Brough only said, "Oh, indeed!" and did not talk any further on

  the subject, but began admiring my diamond-pin very much.

  "Titmarsh, my dear boy," says he, "I have a young lady at Fulham

  who is worth seeing, I assure you, and who has heard so much about

  you from her father (for I like you, my boy, I don't care to own

  it), that she is rather anxious to see you too. Suppose you come

  down to us for a week? Abednego will do your work."

  "Law, sir! you are very kind," says I.

  "Well, you shall come down; and I hope you will like my claret.

  But hark ye! I don't think, my dear fellow, you are quite smart

  enough--quite well enough dressed. Do you understand me?"

  "I've my blue coat and brass buttons at home, sir."

  "What! that thing with the waist between your shoulders that you

  wore at Mrs. Brough's party?" (It WAS rather high-waisted, being

  made in the country two years before.) "No--no, that will never

  do. Get some new clothes, sir,--two new suits of clothes."

  "Sir!" says I, "I'm already, if the truth must be told, very short

  of money for this quarter, and can't afford myself a new suit for a

  long time to come."

  "Pooh, pooh! don't let that annoy you. Here's a ten-pound note--

  but no, on second thoughts, you may as well go to my tailor's.

  I'll drive you down there: and never mind the bill, my good lad!"

  And drive me down he actually did, in his grand coach-and-four, to

  Mr. Von Stiltz, in Clifford Street, who took my measure, and sent

  me home two of the finest coats ever seen, a dress-coat and a

  frock, a velvet waist-coat, a silk ditto, and three pairs of

  pantaloons, of the most beautiful make. Brough told me to get some

  boots and pumps, and silk stockings for evenings; so that when the

  time came for me to go down to Fulham, I appeared as handsome as

  any young nobleman, and Gus said that "I looked, by Jingo, like a

  regular tip-top swell."

  In the meantime the following letter had been sent down to Hodge

  and Smithers:-

  "RAM ALLEY, CORNHILL, LONDON: July 1822.

  "DEAR SIRS,

  * * *

  [This part being on private affairs relative to the cases of Dixon

  v. Haggerstony, Snodgrass v. Rubbidge and another, I am not

  permitted to extract.]

  * * *

  "Likewise we beg to hand you a few more prospectuses of the

  Independent West Diddlesex Fire and Life Insurance Company, of

  which we have the honour to be the solicitors in London. We wrote

  to you last year, requesting you to accept the Slopperton and

  Somerset agency for the same, and have been expecting for some time

  back that either shares or assurances should be effected by you.

&nbs
p; "The capital of the Company, as you know, is five millions sterling

  (say 5,000,000L.), and we are in a situation to offer more than the

  usual commission to our agents of the legal profession. We shall

  be happy to give a premium of 6 per cent. for shares to the amount

  of 1,000L., 6.5 per cent. above a thousand, to be paid immediately

  upon the taking of the shares.

  "I am, dear Sirs, for self and partners,

  "Yours most faithfully,

  "SAMUEL JACKSON."

  This letter, as I have said, came into my hands some time

  afterwards. I knew nothing of it in the year 1822, when, in my new

  suit of clothes, I went down to pass a week at the Rookery, Fulham,

  residence of John Brough, Esquire, M.P.

  CHAPTER VII

  HOW SAMUEL TITMARSH REACHED THE HIGHEST POINT OF PROSPERITY

  If I had the pen of a George Robins, I might describe the Rookery

  properly: suffice it, however, to say it is a very handsome

  country place; with handsome lawns sloping down to the river,

  handsome shrubberies and conservatories, fine stables, outhouses,

  kitchen-gardens, and everything belonging to a first-rate rus in

  urbe, as the great auctioneer called it when he hammered it down

  some years after.

  I arrived on a Saturday at half-an-hour before dinner: a grave

  gentleman out of livery showed me to my room; a man in a chocolate

  coat and gold lace, with Brough's crest on the buttons, brought me

  a silver shaving-pot of hot water on a silver tray; and a grand

  dinner was ready at six, at which I had the honour of appearing in

  Von Stiltz's dress-coat and my new silk stockings and pumps.

  Brough took me by the hand as I came in, and presented me to his

  lady, a stout fair-haired woman, in light blue satin; then to his

  daughter, a tall, thin, dark-eyed girl, with beetle-brows, looking

  very ill-natured, and about eighteen.

  "Belinda my love," said her papa, "this young gentleman is one of

  my clerks, who was at our ball."

  "Oh, indeed!" says Belinda, tossing up her head.

  "But not a common clerk, Miss Belinda,--so, if you please, we will

  have none of your aristocratic airs with him. He is a nephew of

  the Countess of Drum; and I hope he will soon be very high in our

  establishment, and in the city of London."

  At the name of Countess (I had a dozen times rectified the error

  about our relationship), Miss Belinda made a low curtsey, and

  stared at me very hard, and said she would try and make the Rookery

  pleasant to any friend of Papa's. "We have not much MONDE to-day,"

  continued Miss Brough, "and are only in petit comite; but I hope

  before you leave us you will see some societe that will make your

  sejour agreeable."

  I saw at once that she was a fashionable girl, from her using the

  French language in this way.

  "Isn't she a fine girl?" said Brough, whispering to me, and

  evidently as proud of her as a man could be. "Isn't she a fine

  girl--eh, you dog? Do you see breeding like that in

  Somersetshire?"

  "No, sir, upon my word!" answered I, rather slily; for I was

  thinking all the while how "Somebody" was a thousand times more

  beautiful, simple, and ladylike.

  "And what has my dearest love been doing all day?" said her papa.

  "Oh, Pa! I have PINCED the harp a little to Captain Fizgig's

  flute. Didn't I, Captain Fizgig?"

  Captain the Honourable Francis Fizgig said, "Yes, Brough, your fair

  daughter PINCED the harp, and TOUCHED the piano, and EGRATIGNED the

  guitar, and ECORCHED a song or two; and we had the pleasure of a

  PROMENADE A L'EAU,--of a walk upon the water."

  "Law, Captain!" cries Mrs. Brough, "walk on the water?"

  "Hush, Mamma, you don't understand French!" says Miss Belinda, with

  a sneer.

  "It's a sad disadvantage, madam," says Fizgig, gravely; "and I

  recommend you and Brough here, who are coming out in the great