Doomsday Wonderland c1-855

by N. Heller

  "I didn't spend $1000 per hour on therapy for nothing," Qing Jiuliu responded idly. Incidentally, he was blocking the dead body from Lin Sanjiu's view.

  When the invisible 1200KJ entered her body via her skin, Lin Sanjiu heard a snapping sound. She lowered her eyes abruptly. Even though that really wasn't much energy, she felt a strange warmth spreading through her body. After that, Lin Sanjiu started feeling more energetic as if her organs had all been nourished.

  Her two companions quickly found the two cards, [Oh My God! My wallet is missing!] and [An Unfinished Oil Painting], that Carrot Lo had taken away. They placed them on the dining table. As Carrot Lo did not hide his [Military Compressed Energy] and the mini trash can after taking them out, they immediately found them too. However, he seemed to have kept most of his items in some sort of interspatial storage. After searching for a long time, both of them finally realized that there was something different about Carrot Lo's trousers.

  They realized that items disappeared the moment they slid them along the seams of the man's trousers. The pair of trousers were a sort of interspatial storage item!

  "Even so, I don't want to wear his trousers," Ji Shanqing frowned, "They stink."

  "I don't want them either. His legs are too short," he concluded.

  Lin Sanjiu pursed her lips while she sat silently. Things had changed too quickly and she was still processing the situation.

  "Huh?" the grand prize remarked suddenly.

  Startled, Lin Sanjiu quickly asked, "What's the matter?"

  The two people sitting on the floor turned back to look at her; their eyes were sparkling.

  "He has many items…"

  Chapter 497 - Loaded

  "Honestly speaking, right now, I can better understand why a person might want to hunt down consular officers."

  After Ji Shanqing said that, he exhaled deeply and placed the last item he could find from Carrot Lo's trousers, on the dining table. Now, items covered half the area on the dining table for six.

  A few candles had completely melted so the table was only dimly lit by the remaining ones, stunted candles. The paraphernalia on the table reflected the soft glow from the warm candlelight.

  Lin Sanjiu did not join them. From the beginning, she simply sat in silence behind her two companions and watched as they took out item after item from the man's trousers. Initially, she tried to keep her face straight but, at that moment, she could not hide her astonishment.

  "I've heard consular officers were rich, but I didn't think he'd be this loaded..."

  Ji Shanqing and Qing Jiuliu sat down at the dining table. An orange glow lit their faces but everything else was clouded by darkness, including the corpse that was not far from them.

  At that moment, there were eleven items on the table.

  Eleven items might not sound like much. If a consular officer could get an item for every visa they issued, they would probably have a few dozen items in each world—even if the situation at Meat Elysium was unique.

  Considering this, consular officers would probably amass so many items that it would be difficult for them to remember their names and uses. The norm for most consular officers was to get rid of all Special Items they deemed useless once they returned to the Twelve Worlds Centrum.

  A "mere peasant" like Lin Sanjiu had no idea that being a permanent resident of any of the Twelve Worlds was expensive and that it was a recurring cost.

  Logically speaking, it was absolutely possible for consular officers to live in the Twelve Worlds their entire life but they would usually travel to other worlds outside the centrum. They did this to increase the types of visas they could issue and to get more resources. As there were too many consular officers in the Twelve Worlds, they could barely get a good price for a visa, especially the most common type.

  In other words, the items on the dining table were Carrot Lo's best selection.

  The item on the far left was a lacquered green birdcage which was half the height of a man. To be fair, it wasn't technically "one" item because the wooden birdcage adorned with elaborate carvings was filled with miscellaneous supplies. Despite the exalted status of consular officers, Carrot Lo would still have to eat and dress himself. Apparently, he had stuffed all the daily necessities he needed into the birdcage and treated it as a luggage case.

  "Why aren't you moving? Why are you just staring blankly?" Qing Jiuliu gestured at Lin Sanjiu with his chin. Meanwhile, he absorbed another mouthful of wine from a bottle. He closed his eyes while he enjoyed his alcohol, "We're waiting for the descriptions from your card."

  Lin Sanjiu shot a glance at him. Before she could say anything, Qing Jiuliu interrupted her.

  "Alright, alright. We know that we've corrupted you this time. Goddamn, it's terrible but convert that into your card. Quick!"

  Lin Sanjiu swallowed the words she wanted to say and sighed defeatedly. The very issue she had been struggling with for hours was pretty much settled with a few words from Qing Jiuliu. Lin Sanjiu found it a little melodramatic if she continued rejecting them and dragging things out.

  Lin Sanjiu hesitated before she finally touched the birdcage silently. A card appeared on the table.

  [Canary's Revenge]

  That f.u.c.k.i.n.g bastard is finally dead!

  On the day of the apocalypse, a kept woman 1 cheered rapturously in her mind. Her beauty and youth had slipped away during the time she was imprisoned in a twisted relationship built on money. She could no longer have a normal relationship and due to that she hated everything. She abhorred the man who did everything he could to stop her from being independent. She despised the man's wife. She detested their children. She was tortured by her past, afraid of her future and mocked her own love… When the apocalypse arrived, it destroyed everything. But, her various anxieties, spite, and malice had coalesced into a large birdcage.

  Activation method: Bring out the birdcage in front of the target and open the door.

  Effect: Any person who fits the specifications will walk into this birdcage in a daze the moment they see it. The target would curl himself or herself up and stay trapped in the cage. A target can only be locked for a maximum of ten days, after all, no one would want to be a kept lover for their entire life. After ten days, the target would be freed regardless.

  Note: With the exception of killing the target, it is up to the user to discover the other functionalities of this birdcage. The effect of this item can be enhanced with other Special Items.

  PS: When you use this item, please take note if the target doesn't have any Special Items or abilities that can counteract the birdcage's effect.

  "This…" Ji Shanqing blinked his eyes almost in disbelief. "If we are fighting against an unbeatable opponent, this is definitely a lifesaving item!"

  "Thankfully, we don't meet the requirements," Qing Jiuliu clicked his tongue, sighingly.

  Perhaps, few people actually targeted consular officers, and even fewer of these meet the specifications of the birdcage. Consequently, Carrot Lo didn't seem to use the item much. The birdcage was filled with clothes, food supply, water, medicine, and other useful supplies that they could definitely use.

  "Look at this second item," Ji Shanqing urged excitedly as he pushed a toothbrush to Lin Sanjiu.

  However, it was just a normal toothbrush.

  "He's crazy," Qing Jiuliu grumbled as he tossed the toothbrush aside. "Why didn't he put this in the birdcage!"

  "Maybe, it's full?" Ji Shanqing took the third item. "This must be a Special Item."

  "If it wasn't a Special Item, no one in the right mind would bring a plastic, palm-size alphabetic letter around," Lin Sanjiu thought to herself as she raised the red letter "e". She couldn't figure out what it was even after much contemplation. Curious, she converted it into a card.

  The moment they read the words on the card, they stood up simultaneously. They nearly knocked over their chairs.

  [eBay]

  That's right. Your eyes aren't deceiving you. It is the same eBa
y you're thinking about.

  How could a simple apocalypse affect the great capitalist pursuit? Even if humankind becomes extinct, eBay existence remain strong. It reincarnated into multiple red plastic letters which are distributed throughout the worlds. Any posthuman who holds a letter is an automatic user of eBay and can make various transactions through their plastic letter.

  Instructions: When a letter is first activated, an identification number would be generated. Even if the user changes, the ID number would not change. All users will use their ID to complete their business transactions.

  When a user holds the letter in his/her palm, the information generated by the letter would enter the user's brain via bioelectricity and an e-commerce interface would appear in the user's mind (let's just leave the exact technological explanation ambiguous). A user can sell items, browse and search for information about other users' products and purchase requirements.

  How can a buyer get the item he/she buys? It's an unsolvable mystery.

  Using some unknown criteria, the "forget-it-you'll-never-get-it" items listed on eBay are all grayed out. Naturally, these items cannot be purchased by the buyer.

  For the tradable items, users have two options. The first option is "Local World Transaction". This option can only be used when both users are in the same world. The second option is "Pay a delivery fee to eBay". After the delivery fee is paid, your item would appear out of the air with a "pop" or out of nowhere. Don't ask me how it is delivered. This is our trade secret. This also applies to any sale of items.

  The card did not provide much detail, so all of them read the whole description very quickly. However, the three heads staring at the card did not move. No one spoke even after some time. When all of them finally reacted to that information, Lin Sanjiu grabbed the red plastic "e" tightly. While her two other companions looked at her eagerly and curiously, she closed her eyes.

  After some time, she finally opened her eyes and exhaled.

  "What's it like?" Qing Jiuliu peered over anxiously. "What did you see? Why aren't you talking?"

  At that moment, Lin Sanjiu's expression was like a little kid who had entered a candy factory for the first time. She opened her mouth as if she wanted to say something. However, after hesitating for a few seconds, she ultimately pushed the plastic letter to them, "You should see for yourselves."

  Her two companions exchanged glances.

  After Ji Shanqing defeated Qing Jiuliu in one round of rock-paper-scissors, he grabbed the plastic letter in his palm. The Special Item obviously didn't have a race requirement. Once Ji Shanqing closed his eyes, a bright screen-like interface appeared out of the darkness. Other than the huge "eBay" on the screen, a revolving banner caught his attention.

  "No. of eBay letters: 10927"

  "Current users: 149"

  In simple terms, there were more than 10000 letters scattered throughout the apocalyptic worlds. However, only 149 users have found and started using them. "That's too little," Ji Shanqing groused inwardly before he looked away. As his focus moved, the screen scrolled down as if it could respond automatically. The rows of words on the next page appeared before him.

  "Total Trading items: 203 items"

  "Current user's tradable items: 37 items"

  The 37 items were listed after those words.

  The grand prize watched as item after item scrolled past him. They were all sort of unimaginable items. For the first time in his 1.5 years of life, he discovered his hobby— online shopping. The Chinese term for canary is used as a euphemism for a kept woman/man.

  Chapter 498 - Regarding The Grand Prize

  After his name was called repeatedly for several times, Ji Shanqing finally exited the eBay interface reluctantly. The grand prize took a deep breath. With his eyes sparkling and his fair skin flushed, he could not control his emotions. He looked at the two other people at the table and sighed, "There are so many things. Can we just buy whatever we want? Wow…"

  "We need to use other items to exchange for them… What did you see?" Lin Sanjiu asked without looking at him. As Qing Jiuliu reached for the plastic letter, Lin Sanjiu touched four other items on the table and converted them into her cards.

  "Many!" the grand prize answered, enthralled. "There are on sorts of items on sale. There are visas, nutrition packs, transportation devices, there is even this mystical oil… I've only browsed through over twenty items, so why did you stop me?"

  "Let's organize these things here. You can continue browsing later," Lin Sanjiu suggested as she massaged her temples. Right now, she felt like the mastermind of the homicide-robbery. Meanwhile, the two real initiators were already distracted.

  Lin Sanjiu could not understand why the grand prize was ironically uninterested in the free items that were directly in front of them.

  "Yeah, I'll help," Ji Shanqing sulked as he watched Qing Jiuliu. The latter was clenching the plastic letter and his eyes were closed. His eyes shifted slightly beneath his eyelids. The grand prize sighed, "What's this?"

  Without the description from Lin Sanjiu's card, the three of them would never be able to guess how the fourth item should be used. As a matter of fact, the Special Item was just a small pile of sand and gravel. To be honest, each of the items that Carrot Lo had chosen to bring along with him seemed unremarkable. Perhaps, he even added the toothbrush just to confuse his enemies.

  [The Mountains Remove The Foolish Old Man] 1

  Let me tell you something. Us, mountains, have been living here for generations. We live honest and decent lives. We don't create trouble and we often provide wood and game. What did I do wrong? Why do I have to move?

  The foolish man thinks that he can shift me just because he found a deity? Bullshit!

  Just watch me! When I see him, I'll create a landslide! Let's see who will run first.

  Instructions: Throw this handful of loose gravel. They will fall to the ground in the same state without scattering. Collect after using.

  Remaining uses: 3/10

  Item effect: Alter an irrevocable situation once.

  Note: This item will only be activated if all the people involved recognize that nothing else can be done to change the irrevocable situation before the user tosses the item. The effect is dependent on the particular event. Even if you're dissatisfied with the outcome, you can't complain to this pitiful mountain.

  "Amazing," the grand prize commended but he suddenly frowned. "However, the requirement for everyone involved to come to a consensus about the situation wouldn't be easy."

  Lin Sanjiu nodded and turned to look at the next item. She stared at the fifth Special Item indecisively—she had no idea if it was even a Special Item—before she reached for it.

  "That's the fifth item. Sis, you're not mistaken."

  "It's a candle?" Lin Sanjiu frowned as she looked at it under the dim candlelight. "But… why does it look similar to the other candles?"

  [Truth Revealing Candle]

  The flames from this candle can pierce through all darkness, unveiling all sorts of disguises and illusions. After you lit it, no illusions can exist under its illumination.

  Instructions: Lit the candle wick. This works even better if the surrounding is dark.

  Effects: Everything would reveal its original form under the illumination of this candlelight. With the exception of a person's lies, any form of disguise/illusion would disappear under the candlelight.

  Note: This is a candle that is very afraid of loneliness. If it is not placed with many other candles, its lifespan would become much shorter. A candle that could actually last for hours might light up only for over ten minutes if it spends many days alone.

  "This speaks volume about Carrot Lo's candle collection," Ji Shanqing commented insightfully. "Carrot Lo gave me all these candles on the table—"

  Lin Sanjiu didn't say anything and lowered her head as she clenched the card in her hand. It was as if she was waiting for that name to quickly fade from their surroundings. Somehow, knowing that detail abo
ut Carrot Lo giving Ji Shanqing those candles to lit the place seemed to affect her inadvertently.

  No matter how obnoxious the man was, she really did not have any grudges against Carrot Lo.

  Just then, Qing Jiuliu placed the [eBay] letter down. Perhaps, he had heard their conversation. He looked up with his glossy, drunken eyes and threw the plastic letter over to Lin Sanjiu. Strangely, though he didn't say anything, Lin Sanjiu felt an incomprehensible sense of relief when she caught the letter.

  "You only went through these items?" Qing Jiuliu pursed his lips. For some reason, there was something off about his expression. His gaze swept past the grand prize before he stuck a cigarette in his mouth and lowered his head. Click. Click. He struck his lighter. When he raised that question, he did not look at the items on the table and avoided Lin Sanjiu's gaze. Lin Sanjiu frowned a little when she noticed this.

  "What's wrong?" Lin Sanjiu asked immediately.

  Contradicting her expectations, Qing Jiuliu answered, "Nothing."

  He turned his head away quietly. The diamond-like sparkle in his eyes was ever so eye-catching. Just when Lin Sanjiu could not hold back from urging him to answer her again, Qing Jiuliu looked at the two of them and curled a corner of his lip. He rapped the table with his knuckles. "Let's get through the items first. I have something to tell both of you. In any case, we will need these items."

  Lin Sanjiu and Ji Shanqing both sat up straight. They exchanged glances feeling somewhat perplexed. Then, Lin Sanjiu decisively converted the remaining six items into her cards all at once. Out of the six items, only half of the items were Special Items. Out of the three remaining items, one was communication equipment from the Munitions Factory, one was a paid membership ID from Consular Officer Association and the last was a key to an unknown lock.

  When Lin Sanjiu saw the key, she suddenly felt a heavy sense of guilt from taking another person's life.