Doomsday Wonderland c1-855

by N. Heller

  Taking a deep breath, Lin Sanjiu shot a glance at the corpse lying not far from her. He was a skinny man yet his death hung heavily on her. The dead body lay stiff on the floor without a single sign of life.

  "Sorry," Lin Sanjiu apologized in her heart and turned her head away. She turned to Qing Jiuliu, "Come on, tell us what you saw on eBay?"

  The grand prize's eyes lit up. "Can we buy it? Is it expensive? Why don't we try to purchase something at least once?"

  Qing Jiuliu rested his chin on a bottle of wine as he eyed his two companions with a seeming smile, "I saw that thing… in the list of grayed out items I can't buy."

  The grand prize instantly turned glum.

  "But, if I tell you what it is, you two—no, at least you would have a crazy urge to buy it." Qing Jiuliu turned to the grand prize and flashed a wide grin at him, showing his pearly white teeth. "The name of that item is [Uterus Project]."

  The grand prize looked back at him blankly.

  "I… I don't plan to have children."

  "I know you don't have any plans," Qing Jiuliu was clearly keeping him in suspense. He continued at a dawdling speed, "That item is used to inject life into an object so that it becomes like a real human. It can only be used on items that resemble a human such as dolls, robots… or a grand prize that looks like a human…" Qing Jiuliu leaned on the table sluggishly, "...et cetera." The author is sort of making a joke about a famous fable. You can find the story here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Foolish_Old_Man_Removes_the_Mountains

  Chapter 499 - The Innumerable Twists and Turns of Getting a Visa

  There was very little information on the page showing the [Uterus Project]. There were no pictures and no detailed explanation about the item. In fact, the only item description that was provided was what Qing Jiuliu told them. As the item effect seemed quite pointless, no one pressed the "Like" button even though the item had been seen over 200 times.

  Lin Sanjiu looked at the pathetic number of "likes" on the item. She pressed the like button on impulse and it instantly changed to 1. Contemplating for a moment, she turned to the "Buy it now" button which remained unchanged and tried to select it.

  A new page suddenly appeared before her:

  "Untradable: you are unable to purchase this item as the physical item is too far from your current location. Please try again after you have changed locations," Lin Sanjiu read out the words she saw. Even though her eyes were closed, she could sense the grand prize leaning toward her. She could feel his warm breath on her ears. Judging just by his appearance, there was no doubt that the grand prize was no different from a real human.

  "Change locations? What's with that?" Ji Shanqing asked zealously.

  "Wait, let me see… Ah, the seller's information is here," Lin Sanjiu scrutinized the seller's ID, "Peppy Lil' Sesame", and read out the information: "This person is currently in a world called 'Endless Tunnel', the world she will be heading to in 28 days is… 'Heaven Underworld'. Oh, isn't this one of the world among the Twelve World Centrum? I think we need to head to the same place to buy that item."

  "This Lil' Sesame sure isn't simple if she can get a visa to the Twelve Worlds," the grand prize mumbled to himself while he frowned.

  "Is the [Uterus Project] expensive?" he quickly asked Lin Sanjiu the moment she exited from [eBay].

  "She didn't set a price. On the page, it only states that she wants to exchange it for a combat Special Item," Lin Sanjiu answered. "If you think about it, we are probably the only ones interested in this [Uterus Project]. No one would probably find a real use for it. It's quite logical why she didn't set a price for it."

  Unlike Puppeteer's ability which gave him absolute control, [Uterus Project] could only make an item into a "human". After the item became human, it would be impossible to tell if it would leave the owner or even stab them in the back. From a certain perspective, there was no reason for such an item to exist. It wasn't too hard to think why the owner wanted to sell it.

  "Um… Sis, what do you think?" Ji Shanqing's eyes sparkled, "Let's buy it?"

  Even though he ended his sentence with a question mark, his face clearly showed "buy-it-buy-it-buy-it!"

  "I think we can try," Lin Sanjiu concluded after some consideration. "Even though there are advantages of you being a grand prize, I think buying it would give us some form of assurance."

  Once Lin Sanjiu made that decision, Ji Shanqing immediately activated his [Inadequate Consular Officer] and planned to issue three visas to "Heaven Underworld" for his companions. Wondering why she had not heard Qing Jiuliu's voice for some time, Lin Sanjiu turned to look at him and realized that he had already fallen asleep.

  It wasn't all that surprising. Even during the murder, Qing Jiuliu did not put his whiskey bottle down. Within this time, he had already finished quite a few bottles of whiskey. His alcohol tolerance was certainly amazing since he fell asleep without getting alcohol poisoning.

  Lin Sanjiu nudged him a few times but he did not wake up. In the end, Lin Sanjiu had no choice but to smack his face a few times. Qing Jiuliu, with his alarming lack of vigilance and caution, finally opened his eyes with difficulty.

  Lin Sanjiu immediately slipped him a paper crane. "Are you awake? Quick, you should inform Cyrus and the others not to come over… I'm worried that they'll find the body when they reach us. It'll be hard to explain the situation then."

  "Why don't you send them that message? You can speak, can't you?" Qing Jiuliu looked as if someone had stolen his backbone. "I'm tired…" he slurred lazily.

  "Aren't you the best actor? You'll be perfect for the job," Lin Sanjiu was already accustomed to the man's puckish personality so she wasn't deterred. She watched him carefully as he delivered the message in a highly convincing manner with his brilliant acting skills. She only spoke to him again after the paper crane disappeared into the dark night sky. "The grand prize is issuing visas for us now. When we reach the next world—"

  "Ah."

  Just as she said that, she heard an unexpected cry. Lin Sanjiu swung her head around only to find the grand prize sitting under the candlelight. His mouth was open. Under the interplay of light from the flames, the helplessness on his face was brazenly clear.

  "What's wrong?"

  "I…" the grand prize hesitated as if he had difficulty enunciating the next few words. After a few seconds, he finally stuttered, "I… I can only issue a single visa to each place."

  "What?" Lin Sanjiu leaped up immediately. She rushed over and grabbed the visas that the grand prize had just issued. She skimmed through the visas one after another and realized that not even one of them was to a duplicate destination.

  "How did this happen?"

  "My ability only fuses other abilities. It doesn't allow me to swap abilities. Even though I killed two consular officers consecutively, my ability is only [Inadequate Consular Officer]." Ji Shanqing was so dejected that even his eyebrows drooped. Refusing to look up, he continued, "At first, I thought that the 'inadequate' only meant that the visas I issued wouldn't be that good. I didn't expect that I could only issue one visa to each location."

  Almost as if he had sensed that Lin Sanjiu was going to ask him another question, the grand prize let out a long sigh, "Moreover, the total number of visas I can issue is very limited… Only the first visa is to a low-level world. As for the rest," when he said this, he jabbed the other cards on the table brusquely, "The Olympics, Pompeii… Who knows what these worlds are… I don't even know what level they are."

  "Isn't there even one visa to the Twelve Worlds Centrum?"

  "No," the grand prize said unhappily.

  Despite his drunken stupor, Qing Jiuliu seemed to have noticed this unfavorable situation through their conversation. He suddenly shifted over and placed his chin on the table. At that moment, he looked like a dog.

  "What should we do now?" Lin Sanjiu was worried. "First, we need to go to Heaven Underworld to buy [Uterus Project]. We also need to bring Magus along and..." Lin Sanjiu looked
at Qing Jiuliu and hesitated before continuing, "...Qing Jiuliu. In the end, we still need to find a consular officer?"

  "You hurt my feelings when you paused," Qing Jiuliu grumbled imperceptibly.

  "Not necessarily," the grand prize rubbed his face, exhaustedly, while he pulled his eyes into two slits. "We can also go on [eBay]. Look… I saw people selling visas on the item listings. Maybe, we can buy visas to Heaven Underworld."

  "That's the only option now," Lin Sanjiu thought to herself as she massaged her temples. She took the plastic letter "e" from the table. Once she held it in her hands, she closed her eyes again.

  "How is it?" the grand prize asked.

  "Take that visa to the low-level world to Magus," Lin Sanjiu ordered, "We don't know when she will be transported to the next world. Let's not take any chances."

  The grand prize acquiesced and left with the visa to "Sandwich Cookie".

  Once Ji Shanqing left, the soft cackling from the burning candle wicks seemed to be the only sound in the living room. The night grew darker making it seem as the whole house was floating in a sea of darkness. Lin Sanjiu held the plastic letter and closed her eyes once more.

  The eBay interface lit up in front of her again.

  "Hey."

  She suddenly heard Qing Jiuliu's voice. She heard a sound from the chair. He seemed to have to stood up. Lin Sanjiu opened her eyes immediately. Before she could ask him what had happened, she was stunned.

  A white fluttering shadow was entering the window.

  "Strange, didn't we just send that paper crane out?" Qing Jiuliu opened his palm. The small paper crane flapped its wings and settled on his hand, "Why did it return so quickly?"

  He got his answer from Cyrus' voice message swiftly.

  "We found a boat. We have been traveling by sea so we're fast. We have reached the shore. We just need to walk for a few hours to reach the place you are." Cyrus sounded very serious. "Don't move the consular officer's body anywhere. Wait for us to look at him."

  He said only a few words so the message ended quickly. Once the message ended, the living room became silent again.

  "Repeat the message," Lin Sanjiu said softly as she stared at the paper crane.

  Qing Jiuliu played Cyrus' message again.

  Alright. They weren't mistaken...

  They heard a whistling sound in the background of Cyrus' message. It seemed some distance away from where Cyrus was.

  Chapter 500 - The Meaning Of The Olympics

  As if it had been infected with the sender's anxiety, the paper crane wings fluttered and blended into the night sky as it flew away. It was a moonless night, and the abandoned village under the sky had merged with the darkness. Pressing herself against the windowsill, Lin Sanjiu waited until the paper crane disappeared before turning around with a deep frown.

  "Don't you know that frowning will create more wrinkles on your forehead?" Qing Jiuliu said as he pointed to the center of his forehead, "... I can see that you don't apply moisturizer on your face often."

  The worried expression on Lin Sanjiu's face froze. She turned her head and glared at him.

  For Qing Jiuliu, everything seemed to be just a movie as long as he wasn't exposed to imminent danger or potential death. He looked like a moviegoer who never formed a connection with the characters. Even if he were struck with worry, he usually wouldn't allow the feeling to remain in him for too long.

  "Those wrinkles are pretty shallow, so you can get rid of them pretty easily. I suggest to you..."

  Lin Sanjiu pulled a long face as Qing Jiuliu continued to blabber on and on. She sat on a chair, raised her hand, and interrupted him, "Okay, stop. Time is of the essence. We should take a look at the visa now before Cyrus and the dimensional rift arrive."

  They wouldn't be able to purchase the visa once Cyrus arrived.

  However, Qing Jiuliu was not interested in this topic as much as the subject regarding Lin Sanjiu's forehead wrinkles. He rested his chin on top of a wine bottle and kept his mouth shut.

  Letting out a breath, Lin Sanjiu held [eBay] in her hand, and soon enough, the listing page appeared before her eyes.

  For some safety reasons, most of the merchandise had no image attached to the listing. However, Lin Sanjiu soon found the "visa" Ji Shanqing mentioned after browsing the page for a few minutes. This was because there was a depiction of a visa called the "Tower of Babel" attached to the listing.

  The "Tower of Babel" visa was on the top row among the other available items. It seemed that it was currently the hot selling item. She clicked on it and found that four transactions had been completed.

  " I have made a deal with a few Consular Officers to become their authorized dealer. A stable supply of an extensive range of visas: you name it, we got it. — How incredible! I never expected this kind of profession would exist," Lin Sanjiu continued to read the rest of the paragraph in a hushed voice, "... Currently, the visas I have in stock are "Tower of Babel," Red Nautilus," and "Love Nest." If you're interested, please click on the purchase button and inform me of which visas you want."

  "Oh, they don't have the "Heaven Underworld?" The grand prize asked, his voice thick with disappointment.

  "Wait, there's more," Lin Sanjiu continued to read, "... If you need a specific visa that you cannot find in the list, please send me a message. I'll find it for you. Also, please take note that I do not accept face-to-face transactions, and the buyer will have to bear all the freight cost."

  "He's smart," Qing Jiuliu mumbled, "I wondered what he would do if his buyer suddenly decided to rob him clean during a trade, so he prevented those by not doing face-to-face transactions."

  Lin Sanjiu didn't reply. Her eyeballs quivered in the sockets. Qing Jiuliu surmised that she was messaging the seller directly.

  "Are their visas expensive?" The grand prize looked at the few discarded visas in his hand. He felt his heart aching, "Why don't we sell these on eBay? Since we're not going to use them, and it's kind of a waste to throw them away."

  Writing a message wasn't a time-consuming task, so very soon, Lin Sanjiu had opened her eyes.

  "Done. The prices are reasonable except for the Red Nautilus, which is one of the Twelve World Centrum, the other two D-class worlds only cost a Special Item each, and it doesn't have to be an assault-type Special Item," she picked up a visa from the table and smiled at the grand prize, "Let me figure out how to sell on eBay."

  Lin Sanjiu took a glance at the visa; then she closed her eyes. Suddenly, she cried out in surprise, "Huh?"

  Qing Jiuliu and the grand prize tore themselves away from what they were doing and turned to see that Lin Sanjiu was still holding the plastic letter in her hand. She didn't move, but her brows were furrowed with a question.

  "What's wrong?" Ji Shanqing asked.

  Lin Sanjiu didn't respond to the question as she pouted. In the next second, she opened her eyes, and her expression had taken a turn and became ugly. With furrowed brows, she glanced between the visas on the table and the grand prize.

  "Hello? Anybody there?" Sitting next to her, Qing Jiuliu rapped his knuckle on the table, looking as like an audience member who was getting impatient with the delayed show.

  "I just saw a few lines of description on the page of that visa," Lin Sanjiu hesitated for a moment, then she went on, "I don't know if I am overthinking or what. Take a look for yourself."

  As she said that, she shoved the plastic letter into Qing Jiuliu's palm.

  The page Qing Jiuliu saw was the page she had been browsing. He closed his eyes and opened again after a few seconds. Likewise, he glanced at the grand prize.

  "What have you guys seen?" Ji Shanqing was perplexed by both of their actions.

  "Erm…" Qing Jiuliu inhaled deeply and talked, "The seller who sells visas is now in the same world as us."

  Lin Sanjiu nodded in assent. The solemn expression remained fixed on her face.

  "So? What does it have to do with us?"

  "At the bottom of his listing page,
he has added this sentence," Lin Sanjiu tried to speak as calmly as possible, " For some reason, my Consular Officer will not and will never issue the visa to the Olympics. "

  The grand prize blinked his dewy eyes; then, in the next second, he jumped as the realization suddenly hit him, "Ah!"

  "Now you remember," Qing Jiuliu nodded, leaning back.

  The grand prize's glossy red lips remained ajar. Even with the help of the orange flame, it couldn't hide away the paleness on his face. It seemed that the sentence wasn't directed at the buyer in any sense of the word.

  "... Cyrus has mentioned that the female Consular Officer who sought their protection was murdered the very night after she issued a visa to the Olympics to prove her identity," the grand prize said under his breath before taking his seat, "If it was merely a coincidence, then we couldn't explain the words from the visa agent."

  "Whether or not he's a visa agent or a Consular Officer who's just trying to keep his identity a secret," Qing Jiuliu lit up another cigarette, and talked as he puffed a ring of smoke into the air, "... It's apparent that he knew somebody is going after Consular Officers in Meat Elysium."

  "And the common thing between all the murdered Consular Officers is that all of them had issued a visa to the Olympics at some point during their stay in Meat Elysium," Lin Sanjiu sighed, chiming in.

  The moment the words were spoken, three of them then looked at the table.

  Under the dim, flickering candlelight, the visa that read "the Olympics" was lying motionlessly on top of the desk with a metallic glow on edge.

  "... I have issued one," said the grand prize, sounding aggrieved.

  The room fell into a deep silence for a few seconds. The candlelight danced around in the darkness.

  "Gee, don't waver!" Lin Sanjiu pushed the table and rose to her feet, "Tit for tat is fair play. We won't go for the murderer unless he comes for us. If he came, I'd make damn well sure that he will regret making such a trip. After all, we need a reason to explain the death of Carrot."

  She eyed them with a sharp, resolute gaze. Gone from her face was the strained and anxious expression, "I'll give you two one or two Special Items. Remember, keep them on your body all the time, especially you, Qing Jiuliu." Lin Sanjiu implored as she fixed her gaze on Qing Jiuliu, "And, don't act separately tonight. We have to stay together until Cyrus gets here."