The Lies We Tell

by Katie Rae

  It was early in the morning and I knew we had to get up to do my work out soon. The sun wasn’t up but there was a Florida rainstorm blowing through, lightning flashing in the window every so often. I took those pockets of light to gaze down at the woman in my arms.

  I couldn’t believe we were here, like this. Together. I think I knew when I first saw her that this is where we would be. Where we should be. I knew us coming together like this would be incredible.

  Her fire was as good as her friendliness. She was smart and spunky. Ambitious and determined. I wanted to see her succeed in our world of grunts and jocks. I wanted to watch her flourish while putting guys like me, the ones that give her shit, in their place. I wanted to be the guy that stood beside her and punched the Fernandez’s of the world, too.

  I had to get over the jealousy that ensued inside of me when I saw her touching other guys—like Ethan.

  This is why relationships among us on the team weren’t allowed. There were too many variables that made it a really bad idea. I wasn’t sure that I could handle watching her rub someone else’s thighs the way she did mine. Or their shoulders. Or their fingers.

  Not even fingers.

  Maybe it was possible, as long as I knew I was the one in her bed at night.

  Maybe.

  My thoughts kept straying from one random thing to the next until I felt her move under me, bringing me back to her presence in my arms. She gently rubbed her nose on my chest like a soft kiss. My fingers continued in her hair, rubbing melodiously—just enough so she knew I was awake.

  “How do you smell so good?” She asked. My chest rumbled with my quiet laugh at her question. “So are you admitting that you lied to me?”

  She looked up quickly and widened her eyes, “Lied?”

  “Yeah, when you told me I stunk,” I reminded her.

  She smiled a little and laid her head back down on my chest. “Maybe.”

  But I already knew that.

  “It's ok. I've lied to you a few times, too.”

  “Well aren’t we quite the pair. What do you need to fess up to? Is that perfect hair a toupe? Do you steal signs?”

  I laughed and tickled her a bit. "None of that."

  "So tell me something true, Chase." She looked up and rested her chin on her hand, looking intently at me.

  I started to joke with her some more, tease her, ask her or tell her something random and outlandish. Since we had started having dinner every night, we had started asking each other random questions, like, "What is the perfect vacation?" or "What's the worst pain you've ever felt?"

  But there was something I wanted to clear the air about.

  “It’s not just the money,” I confessed.

  “What else is there?” She playfully asked, knowing exactly what I had meant when I said it.

  “I’m old,” I started, confessing a small weakness in my armor. “In baseball years, I have only a few left to play. Especially at catcher. It won’t be long before I am moved to the bench to back up some younger version with fresh knees and the kind of stamina I lack.”

  Becca was quiet as her eyes bounced back and forth between mine. She was so serious that I was afraid I had opened up a window that I didn’t want open. I wanted to tell her the truth, but I didn’t want her pity or consolation.

  “Chase?" She started, sounding unsure. "I probably won’t be able to walk today because of your stamina, how in the hell is it lacking?”

  I barked a laugh, “I said in baseball years.”

  She waved me off, “Yeah whatever. Same thing.”

  No, it wasn’t the same thing. But she didn’t patronize me with “you will be ok” or “aw poor Chase.”

  She sat up and straddled me, my hands finding her hips and holding tight. Somehow, we had managed to get semi-dressed for bed before falling asleep together, so my boxers and her panties were separating us. She had on an oversized King's t-shirt that she liked wearing to bed. It swallowed her whole and her hair was brought up into a sexy mess on her head.

  I started to grow hard as she bit her lip and gently rubbed herself on me. “How am I going to go to work today knowing that every time I see you, I will wish we were here, doing this?”

  I used my hands on her hips to help her keep moving, holding a groan in as I replied. “I will call you Princess, and you will jeer at me, and I will piss you off, and you will want to remove my balls again.”

  She shook her head, her breathing getting more erratic. “No, I won’t. You will call me Princess and I will think about you and me like this and I will want to fuck you. Again.”

  I laughed out loud again. “I could try and call you Becca, I suppose.”

  She stopped and opened her eyes wide, staring down at me. “Don’t you dare. A change that big will scream, 'they’re fucking!'”

  I smiled at her, knowing this conversation was senseless but in danger of creeping into uncertain territory. I didn’t want to have a serious talk right now. We would be fine as long as we kept ourselves professional.

  All I cared about right now was giving her one more thing to think about when I called her Princess.

  ◆◆◆

  “You want to go out again tonight?” Kace asked as we changed out of our uniforms after the game. “Ali wants to ask a friend to dinner again, so it’s just us guys.”

  “Not tonight, man, I am going to go to bed early.” That wasn’t a lie. I was going to be in bed, Becca’s bed. I faked a tired stretch anyway, just to lay it on thick.

  Becca and I had somehow managed to make it all day without seeing much of each other. That was both a blessing and a curse.

  I missed her.

  This morning, after I flipped her over and came inside of her again, we talked it out. We made a deal. Try not to speak to each other all day, meet up for my workout this evening, and fuck in her bed all night to make up for being so good all day.

  It was a solid plan, really.

  Kace’s face morphed into a puzzled stare and his eyes got darker and darker the longer he stayed there. He started to speak, but the door swung open and Fernandez called for me, making him stop and close his mouth back with a bite.

  Instead of words, we had a minute-long stare down. He was obviously troubled by something, and I was pretty much just confused. But whatever was bothering him wasn’t something he wanted to discuss in front of Fernandez.

  “Cap? I need Turner.”

  “Take em,” Kace shrugged, still holding my eyes with his.

  “Um…..” Fernandez wasn’t sure what to do.

  “You ok, Cap?” I asked. I mean, one second he was inviting me for drinks, the next he was looking at me with disdain.

  “Yep. Go see what Manny needs and I will catch up with you later.” His words seemed calmer than his stance. He started to back away, clearly trying to make sense of something.

  As was I. A million things ran through my mind trying to figure him out. All I did was tell him no to his invite.

  What the fuck, Cap?

  I didn’t know what his problem was, but I knew one thing for damn sure: Dudes didn’t get pissy when we turned down bar invites.

  Something was up.

  Chapter 20

  Becca

  It had been a long day.

  A very long day.

  I was exhausted from running between Eddie and Ethan. Pitchers are so dang needy.

  Then I had a billion pages of paperwork and had to help one of the other interns with a chest wrap, all before the game even started.

  I barely saw Chase at all, just in passing when I heard him and Fernandez discussing how they could help one of the pitchers with pitch signs after the game. I didn’t pay much attention to their words; just Chase’s butt in his dirty, played-in uniform.

  That was the difference in yesterday and today. Yesterday, I would have looked at his butt, but I wouldn’t have admitted it--even to myself. Today I was thinking about how that butt looked in the mirror last night as Chase, once again, wrapped my legs a
round him. That time in the shower.

  And just as I predicted, I crossed the path of no return with Chase, and now he was all I could think about. By some miracle of baseball, I got through the day. I was ready to curl up in Chase’s arms and reward our efforts with a sex-a-thon.

  Earlier, Ali had asked me to have dinner with her again. I turned her down, letting her know I was headed to bed early. She didn’t argue, she just conveyed her understanding since all I did was work.

  “I’m gonna text the guys and tell them to go out anyway,” she had said, “I am pretty tired too.”

  I was waiting for Chase to meet me in the training room when I heard the door open behind me. I turned with a sexy smile on my face, ready to greet Chase. But was, instead, surprised by Kace’s appearance in the doorway.

  “Oh hey,” I said, playing off my smile as delirium. “What are you doing here? I was just leaving.”

  “Just checking in,” he said quietly, crossing his arms and legs and leaning on the door jam.

  “Oh? Well, I’m fine. Just finishing up some things.”

  “Like what?” Oh shit. He was suspicious. He was questioning me. But I was a grown-ass woman and didn’t owe him an answer.

  Work.”

  “Hmmmm.”

  “What are you doing? Aren’t you supposed to be somewhere else?”

  “Yeah well,” he shoved off the door and walked further into the room. “I started thinking. Something isn’t right, Becs.”

  He figured something out. I knew it. I could feel it.

  But the lies had gotten so out of hand, I didn’t know which one he figured out. Just like every time Gary talked to me, I panicked.

  The lies. “Enlighten me,” I said nonchalantly. And I meant that. He needed to enlighten me and tell me what he knew.

  “It’s Chase, Becs. He hasn’t been acting right.”

  “What does that have to do with me?”

  “You have been working closely with him, I think you know what I mean.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I practically yelled. If he thought I was going to implicate myself, he could think again.

  “We need to talk this out. This is crazy shit, Becs.”

  “Stop acting like everything is your business.”

  “Well this is actually my business.”

  I didn’t know what he knew, but I knew for damn certain it wasn’t his business. I wasn’t even going to satisfy him with a response.

  Forget this, forget him.

  Chase was going to have to go a third night without his PT because I was not subjecting myself to Kace’s almighty bullshit.

  I stomped out and headed for the door as Kace said behind me, “Don’t ruin your career for him. Don’t get yourself in trouble.”

  I winced at his words but kept moving forward. I sent off a quick text to Chase to avoid the stadium, because a few players were there. He was running behind trying to grab our dinner, so I knew I caught him in time.

  Chase: Who the hell was there this late?

  Becca: I didn’t go in and find out, I just heard them using the equipment and left.

  Chase: You want to come up to my room?

  Becca: Can you come to mine?

  Chase: Of course, baby. I will bring food.

  Yeah, I lied again.

  It’s what I did.

  But telling him the truth may burst our bubble. And I wasn’t ready for that yet—I was nowhere near ready.

  If I was going to blow my career to smithereens, I was going to have quite a few more Chase-induced orgasms first. At least that way I would be too high to care.

  Plus, I was positive that once I got a chance, I could explain things to Kace and beg him to keep quiet. At least until the end of spring training. Then I would be going home anyway.

  Right?

  Chase didn’t think so.

  “Princess, there isn’t a chance in hell they’re not hiring you for the season. They put Ethan and Eddie’s treatment in your hands. That is a big deal. You’re a shoo-in.”

  I shook my head, chewing the salad Chase had gotten me and swallowing before I responded. He had made it up to the room and we were sitting at my small table by the window eating.

  “I don’t think so. I have been too much of a distraction for the team.”

  Chase scoffed, “Like what?”

  I didn’t answer with words, I just used my fork to point to the knot that still rested on my head.

  “That was a freak thing and wasn’t your fault.”

  “Would it have happened to one of the other guys? Noooo. And,” I added, “let’s not forget, I am also the reason you punched Manny.”

  “Nooo,” Chase said, mimicking my drawn-out response. “Fernandez got himself punched for being a dick.”

  "Whatever, I was the root cause."

  Instead of continuing to wallow in self-pity, I climbed onto Chase’s lap and all but begged him for more of what we had started.

  He obliged.

  I was thoroughly fucked and on my next high when we started a movie on Netflix. We laid in each other’s arms, relaxed and content.

  “Chase?”

  “Yeah, Princess?”

  “What is this?” I don’t know where the question came from. I didn’t even really know what I was asking. I was even scared of the answer.

  “I don’t know,” he replied, still looking toward the TV. I guess that was fair enough since I didn’t even know what I was asking. Then he added, “But I like it.

  I smiled into his chest, “Me too.

  Chapter 21

  Chase

  Life was good.

  Spring training was sailing by, successfully. I had hit six home runs in the last five days. Coincidently, it had been five days since Becca and I started making bedtime our fun time.

  We decided to stop doing PT in the gym at the stadium and opted to do a different routine in my room since mine had more space. Then we usually ended up in the shower together, sneaking to her room together, sleeping cuddled up together and starting all over again the next morning.

  When we were at the stadium, we kept ourselves professional. It wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be. It was kind of fun. We would end up laughing at each other later when we were alone.

  “Your face when Eddie started explaining his toe fungus almost had me losing it.”

  “I was trying to stay professional, but I almost begged you to carry me away.”

  “I would have saved you.”

  And I would have. All Becca had to do was say the word and I would save her from anything. Not that she needed to be saved. The girl had the spine of a tiger—strong and confident. She would always tell me how nervous she was when she was on the field or talking to certain people, but it didn’t show.

  On top of being strong and beautiful, she was smart. Her intelligence knew no bounds. I was always amazed, as I watched her work, at her level of knowledge and ability to reason through a problem.

  I knew I was seeing her with sex-goggles on, but did not doubt that everyone else could see what I saw. She belonged here. The team would be better with her around. She would be offered that position.

  I knew she would.

  And then she and I would have some decisions to make. Because spring training was one thing, but when the season started, shit got real. It was grueling and long. It was fun, but way more serious. And if we continued whatever this was, how long would it be before we got caught? How long would it be before one of us couldn’t take the hiding and lying anymore?

  I was tempted to cut ties now, to step back and watch her shine from afar. I would even get by with my knee and handle as much as I could on my own.

  But I didn’t. I wouldn't. I couldn't.

  I was too happy.

  I was too selfish.

  We had eight days before spring training ended. Eight days to see each other and be with each other and soak each other in before we had to walk away. I wasn’t going to waste it being a
noble idiot.

  ◆◆◆

  Becca denied it, but I was convinced Kace knew about us. He didn’t speak to me, didn’t invite me out anymore, and eyed me like he was waiting for me to kill an innocent cat or something.

  Fuck if I knew.

  I couldn’t figure out why he would care, either. Except for the fact that none of us, including Kace, wanted to see Becca raked through the coals for her affair with a ballplayer. It would be safe to assume he didn’t think I cared about Becca and was just using her for a warm body, not considering the risks she was taking.

  Whatever his problem was, he was staying quiet. But I knew in eight days, he would ‘Captain Up’ and level me with whatever he needed to say.

  Until then, I was focusing on Fernandez’s latest bullshit.

  “We need to dumb down the signs for Keith, man. He just isn’t getting it.”

  Keith Sanders was a relief pitcher, new to the team. New to the league. When I put down one finger for a fastball, he threw a changeup. He could pitch his ass off, but Manny wasn’t wrong, Keith struggled with the signs.

  “How much simpler can it get?” I asked. I understood Fernandez’s concern, but I felt we needed to approach this another way.

  I looked at the other two catchers for their opinion. Us four had huddled up in a conference room to have a catcher’s meeting. Keith was the main topic.

  They both shrugged, most likely not caring, since they were both headed to the minors after spring training. That is unless one of them could beat out Fernandez for the backup job.

  That remained to be seen.

  “Ok, then let’s talk about why he’s so dumb,” Fernandez said. I started to roll my eyes at the way he so blatantly called another teammate “dumb.” But his next words made me cartoon spit my water across the table before my eyes had a chance to roll. “He’s fucking the intern.”

  As I said, the water I had been sipping on was now dispersed well across the room via my mouth. “What the fuck?”

  “I am just calling it as I see it.”