My Daddy Is a Hero

by Lena Derhally

  In Chris’ account in his prison confession, Cindy did not take the allergies seriously. She always thought Shanann was overreacting, controlling, and overbearing.

  According to the police discovery, Cindy’s other grandchildren were eating ice cream that either contained nuts or were processed in a factory with nuts, and CeCe wasn’t allowed to have any. Shanann had told people that Cindy had said the girls “have to learn that they can’t always have what they want.” Shanann disagreed, saying that they were two and four and shouldn’t be taunted with ice cream when they couldn’t have any. Shanann’s friend also relayed in the police discovery that Shanann said Jamie had put a bowl of pistachios within arms-length of CeCe. However, this is hearsay, and it is unclear as to what happened or what was said in those moments.

  Shanann had enough and flipped out. She called Frank, her father, and asked him to come pick them up immediately. She said she didn’t want her children unsupervised around Cindy and Ronnie, and she felt she could never trust them again. As much as she felt that she had tried to make amends over the years, this was putting her children’s lives at risk, and she couldn’t excuse it anymore.

  After they left Cindy’s and Ronnie’s house, Shanann was still furious. She vented to people in an allergy Facebook support group in hopes that people who could truly understand what her experience was like could validate her. She felt that Cindy didn’t take her seriously and would call her crazy and say she was overreacting.

  Shanann called Chris several times to explain to him what happened and to convey how angry she was.

  She also texted him late in the afternoon: “You should call your dad and tell him you did not appreciate your mom putting your daughter at risk today, nor do you like that she teased our girls. You should also say you don’t appreciate her saying they have to learn they can’t always get what they want! They are 2 and 4!”

  Chris responded as she had hoped. “l will call him and tell him what I think about this. It’s not fucking cool at all because it is the kids. I will set this right.”

  Chris called his parents as he said he would, but he also told them not to worry because he was done with Shanann and would be leaving her. He told them he had finally “seen the light.”

  The next morning, Shanann texted Chris again.

  “You ok? It’s like you don’t want to talk l kept trying to talk and I had to dig it out of you?”

  “I’m fine baby. The last few days at work have put a lot of responsibility on me with new people. I didn’t mean to seem short Boo. I love you to the moon and back!” Chris replied disingenuously, yet again.

  Even though his words were loving, Shanann still didn’t feel reassured. She knew something was wrong.

  “l miss you and l feel like you just want to work out and run,” Shanann said, looking for attention she felt he was withholding.

  “Running helps clear my head. It’s a way to free it all.”

  “I wish my husband wanted to talk to me,” Shanann texted back.

  Shanann wasn’t aware that Chris had been texting Nikki that day, also calling her “Boo,” the nickname he always used with Shanann.

  On July 14, Nikki and Chris went to the Shelby American Collection, a museum showcasing Mustang cars in Boulder, Colorado. While they were there, Shanann made four unanswered calls to Chris. After the fifth missed call, he called her back briefly.

  Nikki visited Chris’s house that day, supposedly the second and last time she would ever be there. She recalled in her police interview that she felt uncomfortable there as she looked at pictures of Shanann and the girls framed all over the house. Chris had asked her to come over to help him set up an app for managing his calories, and she had agreed, happy to share her knowledge with him. She was a fitness junkie and enjoyed helping as his interest grew in a lifestyle she was passionate about.

  In his letters to Cadle, Chris said that Nikki had been playing with Dieter and went upstairs, where she saw pictures of his family. She came downstairs with a shocked look on her face and asked him why he would want to leave everything he had built with his wife. Chris confessed that before he and Nikki started their relationship, he and Shanann were actively trying for another baby. Nikki lost her cool and told him that his relationship with Shanann must not have been that bad if they were trying to conceive again. She stormed out of the house and sat in her truck, texting Chris for thirty minutes. Chris said he somehow managed to calm her down. Even though Chris seemed to think his relationship with Nikki was great, it’s clear that there was some drama present from the very beginning.

  During the rest of the afternoon, even when Nikki was not with him, Chris ignored all Shanann’s calls. He spent forty-five minutes on the phone with Nikki, and during that phone call, Shanann called him four more times. After he got off the phone with Nikki, he called Shanann back briefly and then spent the next two hours researching gems and minerals on his phone for Nikki.

  Later that evening, Chris said Nikki acted as if nothing had happened. In Cadle’s book, Chris said Nikki told him, “I got mad because I thought I could give you a son, and when you told me you and your wife were trying, that made me upset.” Apparently, Nikki was also upset because she didn’t have any “firsts” with Chris, clearly feeling threatened by his relationship with his wife. She was actively competing for him now and didn’t seem like she was planning on backing off. Chris mentioned in his correspondence with Cadle that this was when the idea to murder his family started.

  On July 17, CeCe celebrated her third birthday in North Carolina. Her birthday party was scheduled a few days afterward. Ronnie and Cindy Watts did not show up to the birthday party or call to say they wouldn’t be attending. Shanann was upset that they would not show up for the birthday of their grandchild, regardless of what had happened. They also unfriended Shanann on Facebook, which she seemed to feel was another way of communicating their disapproval.

  Around this time, Chris had started using the Secret Calculator, an app designed to look like a calculator that would discreetly store photos and videos. The photos would not be easily found by someone potentially snooping through his phone. This app is where he would store nude and semi-nude photos of Nikki.

  On July 21, he and Nikki headed to the Bandimere Speedway, a racetrack in Colorado. Nikki was showing interest in all the activities Chris loved, and he was enticed by that. Before, he played a role where he went along with whatever he believed Shanann wanted. Now, he thought he had someone who was actively showing an interest in the things he cared about. Before he left, he texted Shanann, “Headed out to the track Boo. I will text you when I get there.”

  Shanann was noticing that Chris was putting up more walls with her, despite his texts making it seem as if everything was fine. In addition to internet searching for minerals and gems, Chris was also researching places to take Nikki on dates. He searched items like, “Spanish dancing near me,” “red wine made in Argentina,” “The Cheesecake Factory” and “clean eating restaurants near me.” Nikki was into a healthy lifestyle and clean eating. Presumably, she had told Chris some of her interests or new things she would like to try, and he was thinking of ways to make this happen.

  Toward the end of the month, around July 24, Chris started telling Nikki he was going to leave Shanann. Nikki, hopeful about this prospect, searched “man I’m having an affair with says he will leave his wife.”

  That same day, a frustrated Shanann, unable to get hold of her husband yet again, texted Chris, “Are you alive??”

  “Tire light came on when l was leaving King Soopers last night. Got the tires aired back up. Spent a lot of time looking for anything in it. Nothing at all,” Chris replied.

  Immediately after his reply to Shanann, he searched the internet for “Victoria (sic) Secret” at the Orchard Town Center, clearly for Nikki and not his wife.

  Twenty minutes later, Shanann decided to call Chris out on his distan
t behavior via text: “l realized during this trip what’s missing in our relationship! It’s only one-way emotions and feelings. I can’t come back like this. I need you to meet me halfway. You don’t consider others at all, nor think about other’s feelings.” Shanann was starting to pick up on the lack of empathy Chris was displaying. She was spot on. Chris cared only about his needs.

  “I’m sorry. I love you,” Chris replied, continuing to tell Shanann what he believed she wanted to hear, but this tactic wouldn’t work this time. Shanann was too perceptive and understood his actions did not match his words.

  “l try to give you space, but while you are working and living the bachelor life, I’m carrying our 3rd and fighting with our two kids daily and trying to work and make money. It’s not hard texting love you and miss you. If you don’t mean it then I get it, but we need to talk. I kept looking at my phone all night and no response from you. Like seriously! We didn’t just start dating yesterday! We’ve been together 8 years and have 2.5 kids together.”

  Shanann was horrified that Chris had no sympathy for her and showed little interest in trying to connect with her. What she was picking up on was correct because Chris really could not care less about Shanann, the girls, or anything about his life before Nikki at this point.

  The next day, Chris conducted more internet searches, inquiring about things such as: “When to say I love you,” “When to say I love you for the first time in a new relationship,” “What do you feel when someone tells you they love you?” “How does it feel when someone says I love you?”

  These are odd questions to ask at thirty-three years-old when you supposedly married the love of your life and constantly leave her notes about how much you love her. One would assume that Chris already knew what love felt like. These internet searches would give an alarming amount of insight into how emotionally void Chris Watts really was and is. Furthermore, it was a chilling look at what a fantastic actor he could be.

  Later that afternoon, while Chris was speaking to Shanann on the phone, Nikki left him a voicemail.

  “l miss your face. I was just calling to say hi. Call me back, bye,” she said, with a giggle that a police transcriber described as “eerily disconcerting.”

  On July 28, shortly before Chris was to leave for North Carolina to join his family, he and Nikki had their first overnight getaway at the Great Sand Dunes National Park in Colorado. They set up a tent in the Zapata National Falls campground and went hiking and surfing the sand dunes together. Chris took many photos and videos of the two of them on the trip, including a video of their tent with the song, “Forever Girl” playing in the background: “You’re everything in my whole world, that’s my forever girl, oh yeah, that’s my forever girl.” In another video, Nikki is in the shot speaking directly to the camera:

  “Thank you so much for coming out here with me Christopher, I am having a wonderful time. You mean a lot to me, and I’m glad you’re having a blast.” She then blew a kiss to the camera.

  The next day, they left the Dunes. Chris texted Shanann around 11 o’clock in the morning. “Finished the hike! Packing up and heading home!”

  Shortly before 6 o’clock that night, Shanann sent a text to Chris. “I’m assuming you’re safe considering it’s been 3.5 hours.”

  “There was a car fire and the Renaissance Festival traffic in Colorado Springs. Just got our car. Headed home,” Chris replied.

  At 7:30 pm, Shanann called Chris, and he talked to her for fifteen minutes. Right after they got off the phone, an agitated Shannan texted him: ““Sorry you’re so tired, but I haven’t talked to you in 48 hours and I had a hard weekend. Glad I have you to talk to! If you care...”

  “I’m sorry you had a hard weekend Boo. I will make it up to you I promise. I’m sorry I’m out of it tonight,” Chris replied, being duplicitous as ever.

  “It would have been nice for my husband to show interest in how the girls and I are, and the baby. I’m done with begging for you to talk. See you Tuesday,” she responded testily.

  Over the next twenty-four hours, Chris searched the lyrics to love songs, such as, “Down to Earth” by Through the Roots: “When I’m around you, I can feel peace in the atmosphere…..but when I’m lost yea, you capture me and bring me right back down. If I’m ever cold, I can count on you to heat me up with your presence, and when you send your love to conquer me, I don’t fight it, I just let it.”

  He also searched the lyrics to the song “Love You Like That” by Canaan Smith: “I wanna love, wanna love, wanna love you like that.”

  Throughout the day, he exchanged logistical text messages with Shanann about their alarm company, Vivint. Bella potentially dislocated her ankle, and they traded a few texts about that. In the evening he texted Shanann: “Letting Dieter out and going to bed Boo. Love you.”

  Chris also made good use of the song lyrics he searched for. Before he left to meet his family in North Carolina, he wrote Nikki another handwritten card: Nikki, Wow, where do I even start? The first day I saw you, you took my breath away. The first day I had the guts to talk to you, I got lost in those stunning green eyes. The first day we hung out in the park together, I knew I was addicted. The first time we kissed, I knew I had met the most amazing, unique and electric woman EVER!!! We have a lot of firsts together, Nikki. And I want to keep having them with you!! “All night til the sun comes back, I wanna love, I wanna love, wanna love you like that.” Love, Chris.

  Chapter 13

  “I don’t want to lose anyone.”

  On July 31, Chris flew to North Carolina to be with Shanann, the girls, and both his and Shanann’s families. Before he boarded the flight, he made sure to hide any evidence of his affair with Nikki, transferring all the photos and videos from their Sand Dunes excursion to his secret calculator. One of the videos was of Nikki surfing down a sand dune with short shorts and a scarf covering her face. Chris commented out loud in the video, “So damn sexy.”

  He boarded the flight and sent a quick text to Shanann: “On the plane. Love you Boo.”

  Shanann placed a quick call to Chris. She was angry because he had driven the car to the airport and parked in an expensive lot.

  “You never ever listen to me. How much a day?” Shanann texted him, exasperated.

  Chris texted her pictures of the parking signs and told her the number of the lot.

  “$130 we can’t spend at the beach. Text me when you land in Atlanta.”

  When Chris landed in Raleigh, North Carolina, he texted Shanann that he landed.

  “Let me know when you’re coming down escalator so I can record girls,” she replied.

  “Ok Boo,” Chris responded.

  As promised, Chris alerted Shanann, so she could film a happy reunion between him and his girls. The girls, cute as ever, started running toward Chris, squealing, “Daddy!” An alarm started to sound obnoxiously in the background. When Chris and the girls made their way over to Shanann, who was still filming, Chris kneeled beside his daughters.

  “Now, I can hug you. Come here. Come here, little girls!” he said in a gentle voice as he embraced both simultaneously.

  Later that evening, before she went to bed, Shanann sent Chris a message from another room, presumably because Chris was keeping his distance and didn’t want to stay with his wife:

  “Can you set alarm for 5 am and wake me please?” she requested.

  “Yup. I got it. Love you,” Chris said, continuing to use his automatic, rehearsed statements that meant nothing to him.

  “Love you too,” Shanann sent back.

  Chris’ ruse would not last long after this.

  In an interview with law enforcement, Shanann’s brother, Frankie Jr., mentioned he thought it was very odd that Shanann got very sick the evening Chris arrived in North Carolina. She spent the entire evening vomiting and complaining of a bad headache. Frankie spent all night checking on his sister and th
ought it was bizarre that Chris couldn’t care less that Shanann was sick. He told investigators, “She slept on the couch, which I thought was odd… and that he never came out to see her, because he used to be so nurturing, and I was almost like, dude you’re a little much. I mean he went from being the best guy I could have pictured for my sister to could care less what happened to them. I hugged him a week ago... he helped me with my brakes with my truck. He’s a very smart mechanic, he used to give me advice with things. It’s just so mind-blowing.”

  In Chris’s deleted internet search history, he had typed, “80mg of oxycodon (sic) will…” After speculation online about whether Chris gave Shanann oxycodone to try to make her miscarry, he confessed that accusation was true. In his letters to Cadle, he has given conflicting stories about the oxycodone. At first, he told Cadle he gave the oxycodone twice—once in North Carolina, to try to cause a miscarriage because he thought it would be easier for him to leave her for Nikki if she were not pregnant, and immediately before her death. He later changed the story and said he gave it to her only once in North Carolina to try to get Shanann to miscarry.

  In any case, Shanann became sick with unusual symptoms at fifteen weeks pregnant and immediately after Chris arrived in North Carolina. In texts with a friend, she shared, “The last week I have not been able to pee normal. (Hard to pee). Feeling great otherwise. 10pm-Last night Chris rubbed my back for the first time in over a month. When he was done I sat up and I was lightheaded, body felt kinda numb/tingly, itching all over and just weird. – (11pm ish) about 1 hour later I stood to pee and vomited (mildly) about 30 minutes later massive instant migraine came out of nowhere. Took Imitrex around 2:30am. Usually gets rid of migraine within 20 mins. It’s still just as bad right now. Maybe 1.5 sleep last night and I just vomited again 5:30am. Still lightheaded, shaky, blurry vision and exhausted. Went out to eat last night for dinner. Could this be vaginal infection, migraine, virus, food poisoning, or morning sickness starting at 15 weeks?”