by Mansi Negi
For some reason I didn't make a move to stop him, in fact I felt the need to extend it. I laced my fingers through his hair to keep him from pulling away from me.
"Thought you wanted to, 'just be friends', Delilah." He said, using air quotes before wrapping his hand around the back of my neck and deepening our kiss.
"I do, or I did... I don't know what I want Jonas. I just want to be here with you right now, I guess. Can we just pretend the rest of the world doesn't exist for a little longer." I pulled back looking into his eyes and his eyes lit up, answering my question.
I knew I would regret this, it was everything I'd been fighting, but something just felt right in this moment.
"Hold on." He said, grabbing his keys from the pocket of his dress slacks. He jumped into the cab of his truck and fired it up. The radio cranked and he climbed out extending a hand out to me.
"May I have this dance?" He took my hand and pulled me right to him as he began to sway with me in the field.
"I meant what I said you know. I do like you Jonas... a lot. I wish it could be like this and you and I could be together. I leaned my forehead on his chest as he moved our hips to the music in a steady sway.
One of his hands left my back and came around to lift my chin so my face was looking at him.
"It will be... but 'just friends' when we leave today, I promise." He smiled against my lips as he drew my lower lip into his mouth and we began to kiss again.
The sun was setting as we drove home. A myriad of thoughts ran through my mind as Jonas held me against his body, lazily letting his fingers draw circles on my upper arm.
This had been the most perfect evening I'd had perhaps ever, but dread started to consume me with the thought of our impending return. Each mile bringing us both back to our unfortunate reality.
I moved across the vehicle as Jonas turned down our road, and I heard him loose a disappointed sigh.
"Where did you say we were?" I asked. Hoping my mom wouldn't notice my matted hair that I'd drawn back into a messy bun on top of my head.
"I told her we had to stop at the shop, I had some things to finish up from the other morning when you took my truck, and I was going to make you help." He smiled at me, giving me a sly wink and I let a little laugh leave my throat.
"You're good Jonas, I'll give you that." I giggled at his uncanny ability to lie and go completely undetected.
Although my mind told me that wasn't exactly a quality that should be praised.
We walked in to the house and I huffed in annoyance, trying to feign that I had been worked to the bone and not enjoyed every second of it.
"Did some manual labour, did you?" My dad looked over my appearance with an approving grin.
"I hope you got your money worth out of her after what she did, this weekend." He said to Jonas. They didn't suspect a thing.
"Y, sorry we're so late...turns out her upper body strength is total rubbish. It took twice as long to get anything done. They won't be hiring her anytime soon." He laughed and winked at my dad. Maybe he was too good.
My mom came around the corner carrying two plates of food. She smiled at Jonas and my dad having what she thought was a, "bonding moment". If only she'd known what we had actually been up to.2
"Go ahead and eat kids, then up to bed. Delilah, since you put in the work today, and Jonas says you'll be tutoring him after school in algebra, I'm going to lift your sentence. I talked to Chad's parents and they'll be in town visiting this weekend. You can keep to your room until Friday and I'll give you back your freedom for the weekend." She winked at me. I smiled back. Glancing at Jonas, who chewed the inside of his cheek in irritation at the mention of Chad.1
My parents finished packing away dinner and disappeared up the stairs for the night, leaving Jonas and I on the couch eating our food in awkward silence.
I finished first and went straight to the kitchen discarding my plate into the sink. I turned on the water and began to rinse it.
I felt Jonas behind me. His warm hands met with my waist, and I turned the water off.
"I'm sorry, that you heard that." I said over my shoulder.
"It's fine." He said, moving closer. His head rested on my shoulder. "Just friends, remember... You're going to break up with him this weekend, right?" He spun me to face him. "After what we just did?" He cocked his head at me, looking expectantly into my eyes.
"Jonas." I rested my hands on his chest and exhaled. "I don't know. I honestly don't." And I didn't. Of course, I wanted Jonas, but nothing had changed in our situation, except the fact that I'd made a terrible mistake and let myself develop feelings for the kid that was meant to be my brother.3
"I can do friends for now Lyla, but not if you make me compete for you. That's not fair." He looked at me thoughtfully and I closed my eyes.
He was right. It wasn't fair. None of this was fair.1
"If only I'd met you under different circumstances Jonas." I finally brought my eyes to his again. He swallowed hard and a sad look painted his features.
"So, we're back to this huh?" His sadness took on a little edge.
"Don't be mad at me Jonas. I have no control over any of this." I said, sliding my hands up to his shoulders.
"Yes, you do Delilah. How can you say that? You're 18, you're an adult. You can do this if you want to, and you can definitely break up with your boyfriend." He squeezed me in closer and hugged me against him, before pulling away and looking to me for a response.
"Jonas, Chad and I have been together for a long time. He's supposed to go to the same college as me in a couple of months. We planned it. It's not that easy. It would be like throwing all of my life plans away." I said, hoping he would understand just how intertwined Chad and my life actually were.1
"Fine." He scoffed, turning his head and chewing his bottom lip in annoyance. "But don't be surprised when you're thinking of me the whole time, when you're out with him. I know you want me the same as I want you. You can keep pushing me away Princess, but you'll keep coming back to me, no one can make you feel like I can." He leaned his head down and swept his lips over mine. "Keep fighting me baby, and you'll regret it." He smirked.3
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, feeling like he'd just threatened me.
"I mean, I won't wait for you forever." He responded.3
"I don't want you to wait for me Jonas. I want you to find someone else." I said and meant it.
"Oh yes, someone like Lorna for instance." He said and nuzzled my hair playfully.
Crap, he was right, I didn't like the idea of it, especially her.
"I wish you'd pick someone else, but yes, you can date someone. There's a dance this Saturday, you should ask someone. I'm sure any girl would be dying to go with you." I looked at him encouragingly.2
"Yes, any girl except the one I want." He scoffed, directing his gaze to the floor.9
U are mine
"Are you going? With Chad?" He looked at me funny.
"Yes, I guess, if he's coming here." I said in defeat.
"And you want me to go?" He laughed, but it wasn't a joyful laugh, irritated undertones rang through, giving it an edge that sent shivers running down my spine.
"Let me remind you what you'll be missing Princess." He brought his hands to the front of my buttoned down shirt and ripped the top open sending the first three buttons rolling across the floor.2
I sucked a breath in, shocked at his sudden change in demeanour. His hands found the hem of my skirt and began to pull it up as his mouth came down harshly against my chest, sucking the skin into his mouth.
This wasn't affectionate like he'd been in the water. This was possessive, and dominating. He wanted me to submit to him, he wanted the upper hand.16
His hands wrapped around my bottom possessively and lifted me to him.
I wrapped my legs around him so we wouldn't fall over as he turned and sat me on the island.
"Break up with him Princess. Break up with him and give yourself to me. I'm the one that wants
you. I'm the one that can take care of you. Fuck him... you're mine, Princess. I can make you feel good all the time Delilah." He leaned over me.
His breath came in pants, uneven, ragged pants and his erection rubbed against me over and over. He snaked a hand behind my back holding my lower body steady so he could have total control over me, his hips moved against me harshly and he let out a deep grunt with every pump.
His mouth continued its assault as he ripped my tank top down exposing my breasts and tore into them hard.
Devouring the soft flesh and letting his teeth sink in until I yelped in pain.
"Jonas stop, you'll wake my parents." I moaned, not really meaning it on surface level, but deep down knowing I should be saying it.
"No." He grunted simply, as my body ground against his and his against mine.
His fingers ripped my panties down and I moved my legs so he could pull them off. He pulled away from me and began to twirl them on his finger.
I reached my arms out for him, but he stepped away, balling the panty and tucking them into his pocket. "I'll finish that when you break up with your boyfriend Princess." He tapped against his pocket, "consider these a severance package."
He ran his hand between his legs and rubbed himself a few times while watching me pant for him before he turned and headed upstairs.3
Oh my god! Why do I keep letting this happen?1
I internally scolded and slapped myself for letting my betraying slut of a body have her way again. I tried to calm myself as I put my tank top back in place and smoothed my skirt down.
Why couldn't I use my words when Jonas was all over me? I took one last deep breath and headed up the stairs. Of course, Tyler was awake waiting for me in his room.1
"Hey Delilah." He smirked at me in an almost mocking tone.
"No, not you now too." I pointed a finger at him and narrowed my eyes.
"What happened to your shirt?" He asked as he stood and leaned with one leg on his door frame, crossing the other leg over and crossing his arms over his chest, like an overprotective brother.
"I caught it on something." I said, feeling my cheeks heat under the blush that crept into them.
"Oh yes? Was it Jonas' finger's?" He asked with an amused tone, causing my cheeks to deepen in crimson and I turned away to hide the smile that caught the corners of my mouth just thinking about it. He had to have heard us.2
"Where'd you guys go ?" He asked. I guess he'd been lonely, judging by the game of twenty questions we were having.
"Jonas' work." I responded, raising a brow at him. "Were you waiting on me for something Tyler?" I asked, feeling like he was getting ready to bust me for something at any moment.
"Sorry." He said moving from his door frame to mine as I plopped on my bed. "Am I irritating you?" His voice sounded threatening almost.
"Tyler, do you have something you want to say to me or are you just going to stand there all accusatory like that." I stood and waved my hand around in front of him, he caught it and a wicked grin unfolded over his face.
"I just couldn't help but hear that your boyfriend is coming this weekend, and wondered how Jonas might feel about that." He pulled me to him. "Delilah... I want you...choose me." He backed me up until my legs hit the dresser.9
"Tyler, get out of here, you know this is never going to happen." His lips met mine and he lifted me under my legs on to the dresser. His fingers dug deep into my thighs, shooting pain through my legs.
"Ouch, Tyler stop, you're hurting me! If I had to choose between you and Jonas, I’d choose him. At least he doesn’t force me like you do." I cried out.
He grabbed me hard and threw me onto the bed, splaying his hand over my mouth, and ripping open the rest of my shirt. I clawed at him trying to flail my body to make him stop.5
"Good girl Princess..." he whispered to me, moving his hand away from my mouth. I immediately grabbed his black t-shirt and ripped it down his arm exposing the tattoo.
"Jonas!! What the fuck?!" I scrambled back across my bed, bringing the ripped halves of my shirt together over myself. "Get out! I yelled, loud enough that my parents might hear me.1
"Shh" Jonas held his finger to his lips. "I was just playing Lyla. Don't be pissed." He whispered and rolled on his back at the end of the bed pulling my panties from his pocket and throwing them up toward the ceiling and then catching them. He repeated the action several times before he tossed them into my hamper across the room and rolled to his side propping his head on his hand and looking at me. "You aren't honestly mad, are you?" He asked with a smile.3
"Yes, Jonas I'm beyond mad! I seriously want you out of here now! I don't even want to look at you right now. You really hurt me." I said, rubbing my leg where he had squeezed me so hard. I raised my hands in question, and pointed to the door. He let out a huff.
"Fine." He finally said, lifting himself off of the bed, "but you brought that on yourself Princess, just break up with your fucking boyfriend and learn how to take a joke." He stormed out, slamming the door on his way.
I sat there utterly in shock, wondering why he would think that stunt was even remotely funny.
Standing, I made my way to the shower and turned the water on hot. I peeled off my uniform and climbed in, examining the small round red marks on my thighs where Jonas had just grabbed me.
They were definitely going to bruise, and suddenly I realized he'd done it on purpose.
It would be hard for me to explain away someone's hand prints on my upper thighs to my boyfriend if we tried to be intimate this weekend.
I wonder if he would have just let me believe it was Tyler who had done it if I hadn't figured it out.
I laid my head back and let the hot water wash away everything from the day.
I had let my situation with Jonas go from bad to worse, and now he was trying to stake claim over me.
I had no idea how this weekend would go with Chad here. I almost hated the fact that he was even coming.
If my mom had told me he was coming a week ago I'd have been ecstatic, but now everything in my world had been turned upside down.
I fell asleep quickly. I was exhausted from overthinking everything the last few days.
I woke up a few hours later to hear someone moaning. It was coming from Tyler's room.
"No...no please... please. Please stop." He cried.
I climbed out of bed and made my way to his room. He was thrashing in his bed. I sat on the edge and wrapped my hands around his face.
"Tyler!" I whisper yelled, "wake up, you're just dreaming, wake up." He was dripping sweat and I suddenly felt something warm and wet meet where I was sitting at the edge of his bed.
Oh my god, he'd just peed the bed. "Tyler, Tyler, wake up!" I shook his shoulders.
His hands shot to my neck initially, before he realized it was me and then he pulled me down to him, wrapping his arms around my body and sobbing into my neck. His breathing was erratic and I could feel his heart pounding. Tears flowed
freely down his face and his body shook, he was completely petrified.1
A long time passed before he let go and wiped away tears from his face.
"Are you ok Tyler?" I asked, brushing his sweat soaked hair from his forehead.
"Umm yes, I'm sorry Lyla, I'm sorry." He said burying his face in his pillow and letting his body sag onto his bed.
"Let me help you clean this up." I said, closing his door and turning on the light.
"You don't have to Lyla, I'm sorry, I'm so embarrassed." He held his head in his hands and I rubbed his neck and back comfortingly.
"I don't mind. I want to, really." I said pulling his head over and hugging him. "Go get in my shower, I'll take care of the rest." I said softly, trying to calm him from the nightmare.
He stood and grabbed a fresh pair of boxers and left the room. I folded his bedding over on itself and ran it down to the washer, making sure to grab some baking soda from the kitchen.
A trick I'd seen my mom use on the couch the other day when Wyatt
had had a leaky pull up.
I spread the baking soda over the bed and searched the closet for fresh bedding.
I didn't see any, but I did see the small baseball glove I'd spied the first day that the Landry's had come to live with us.
I pulled it out and held it in my hand wondering if Tyler had played baseball when his adoptive mother had been alive. What had happened to him to make him this scared?
Then I saw the small tag labelled Daniel and instantly knew why he had the glove and why it was so important to him. I was in complete violation of his privacy right now.
Past
Tyler's voice came out shaky from behind me.
"You thinking about playing some baseball?" He gave me a half smile that didn't meet his eyes.
His body still shook a little and even as large and muscular as he was, he looked so vulnerable and young standing there with his arms fidgeting at his sides and his brows pulled together in a pained expression.
"Umm, no, sorry I was just looking for a clean pillow case." I smiled at him and set the baseball glove back on the shelf in his closet.
He grabbed a pair of sweat pants from his bottom drawer and put them on.
"Do you have nightmares like that a lot?" I asked, looking at him sympathetically.
"Not as much as I used to." He admitted. "But more often than I'd like." He wouldn't look me in the eyes, he just stared off with a sad expression, even though he was standing in front of me, his thoughts were somewhere else.
"I'm sorry Tyler. I'm sorry about everything, about Daniel, about Della...about all of it." I said, closing the closet door and turning to face him. I realized my mistake when his face turned completely white.
"What did you just say?" He asked, his eyes going wide in shock, he was definitely back in reality now.2
"It's just, Jonas told me... he took me to where your old house was and told me what happened."
"He told you about Della?" He asked, his eyes met mine now and he looked totally bewildered. "What did he tell you about Della, Lyla?"
He stepped forward grabbing my shoulders and searching my face frantically, tremors beginning to run through him all over again.