I was a Bet

by Mansi Negi

  "Please..." he breathed and locked his lips to mine. I didn't kiss him back this time though. I didn't even grant him access into my mouth. I just stood there.

  "Jonas." I finally pushed him away.

  "I need time... I need you to stop. I can't do this with you right now... it's over." I hadn't noticed Tyler standing right outside the double doors waiting, until I turned and walked out. He gave me a sympathetic look as I walked by.

  "Ly!! Hey Lyla!!" I heard Chad's familiar voice and scanned the parking lot. He was here, driving a black BMW waiting for me.

  I looked across the lot to Jonas, who even though exited after me, was already half way to his truck and had turned to see the boy yelling for me.

  He shook his head at me and a look that can only be described as complete and utter rage took over his face. He knew who it was and he was pissed.

  Lucky for me, Lorna was waiting for him at his truck and yelled for him. I could only imagine what kind of plan he'd come up with to make me pay for this.2

  I made my way over to Chad who jumped out from the driver's side to lift me into a hug, swinging me around, he pulled me into a kiss.

  "Hey baby! I've missed you so much!" He whispered at my ear, and I found myself stiffening so that he'd put me down. As pissed as I was at Jonas, I didn't want to hurt him intentionally. He stared back at me from behind Lorna, who was no doubt, asking him to the dance.

  I walked around Chad's car and climbed into the passenger seat. Jonas stepped forward crossing his arms across his body as we drove passed. Only Chad stopped.

  No, why are we stopping? He put his window down in front of Lorna and Jonas. "Hey Lorna! Long time no see." He smiled and gave her a little wave. Of course, he would stop to say hello to my best friend, which would typically be the sweetest thing ever, if Jonas weren't standing right there scowling at me.

  "Hey Chad! Good to see you. Have you met Jonas and Tyler, Lyla's foster brothers?" She held her hands out toward them and gave me a wink, like she was trying to stir the pot.1

  "Hey guys, I'm sure I'll see more of you this weekend." He waved at them.

  "Can't wait." Jonas said sarcastically, draping an arm around Lorna and locking his eyes on mine.3

  Chad

  "Oh my god Chad! I thought you weren't coming until this weekend." I said in surprise.1

  "I know, I wanted to surprise you." He smiled at me, grabbing my hand in his and planting a kiss on the back of it.

  "Well, you definitely surprised me." I said back, meaning it. I couldn't help but feel like this was divine intervention though. I was on the verge of making possibly the biggest mistake of my life and here he was sweeping in and bringing me back to what is real in my life.

  Providing me with some grounding to the ridiculous rollercoaster ride I'd been on with Jonas.

  "What? You don't seem excited?" He said back, looking at me inquisitively.

  "I am, I really am. I'm just shocked and I'm grounded, I wish you'd have called me and told me and I would have let you know." I said back, sounding bummed out.

  "Already took care of it. I've been at your house all day, and you're all mine tonight. I even got you out of the game. I just have to have you home by eight." He said, waggling his eyebrows at me seductively.

  I had forgotten how cute he was. In a different way than Jonas and Tyler, more of an innocent schoolboy way.

  He was tall and thin, muscular, but he stood 6' 4" with blonde shaggy hair that hung in his blue eyes and his dimples were adorable.1

  "I'm not going to lie Lyla. I've been dying to be with you... this long-distance thing is getting to me.

  When Lorna called and told me about your foster brothers hitting on you, I almost lost it. I know how hard it's been for me going this long without sex..."3

  "Lorna did what?!" I interrupted. That freaking bitch! She was an absolute instigator.

  "Listen, she told me you'd react this way. I trust you Lyla. It's them I don't trust." He said, looking at me as he continued to drive.

  He shouldn't have trusted me. If he knew about everything that had transpired this week between Jonas and I, he would be running for the hills.1

  "Lorna is so full of shit Chad. I honestly don't know what she is even talking about." I lied and felt guilty.

  Here I was chastising Jonas for doing the exact same thing that I was doing.

  "Lorna is the one that has been messing around with Jonas." I said disgusted. She was the one who had been the prime instigator of everything!2

  "Really? She sounded pretty convincing."

  He said, rubbing his hand down his chin and looking over at me. I blew out a huff and stared out the window, unable to meet his eyes after lying right to his face.

  I started to realize that just because Jonas and I weren't going to get together, what I'd already done could not be undone.

  I could never tell Chad about Jonas specifically, his parents would tell mine and it would open a whole can of worms, but it also wasn't fair for me to stay in a relationship with him without letting him know that I had cheated on him.

  I'd tell him this weekend and let him decide if he wanted to be with me after that. It was the right thing to do.

  "Well... where do you want to go?" I asked, changing the subject, I didn't want to have this conversation anymore, not with my guilt eating me alive.

  "We could get some food and go back to our hotel... I have my own room and my parents will be out late visiting. I just need to get you alone." He smiled over.

  I'd never hated myself more. I didn't want to be with him before I told him what I'd done, that would make it even worse.

  "That's fine, but don't get too excited, it's that time of the month for me." I lied.

  I really didn't want to have to tell him today. I was done with shock value for the day, between the Jonas revelation and Mr. Schultz, now Chad being here early... I had filled my quota.1

  "Fuck!" He dragged a hand through his hair. "I really don't care... I'm fine with it." He said looking at me expectantly.6

  "Eww, no I'm not really cool with that." I said again, wishing I could just disappear. Could I be any worse of a person right now.

  As bad as I'd thought Jonas was for his white lie, pretty sure I trumped him on every level.

  Chad ordered me Chick-fil-a and we drove to his hotel.2

  "Staying at the Raddison, huh?" I asked, as if we hadn't just pulled into the parking lot for it. I didn't know what to say.

  It was crazy how little we now knew about one another, the distance had taken a toll on our relationship. I hated small talk, but small talk was the only thing two strangers could do.

  I had my nuggets finished by the time we entered the lobby and when we made it to the room I jumped on the bed, while Chad flipped on the lamp.

  "What do you want to watch." I asked.

  "You." He smiled, climbing over top of me lifting the bottom of my skirt.

  "What the fuck is this?" He jolted his head up angrily and rubbed his hands over the hand print bruises on either side of my thighs. He set his hand over top of them, noting the size of the hand prints.

  "Lyla, what the fuck?" He looked at me, hurt showing in his eyes.

  Speak Lyla, use your words.

  "Not what you think." I said.

  "Ok... so explain please." he said again, raising an eyebrow and looking at the bruises again, tilting his head.

  "Ummm, Chad... we need to talk..." I said, covering my face.

  "Fuck Lyla, are you fucking kidding me?" He leaned back on his hands on the bed and closed his eyes.

  "Who? Who is it? That's all I want to know." He raked his hand through his hair.2

  "Those aren't even from what I did." I said pointing to the bruises.

  "Those were just an accident, but I umm, I did do something with someone. I didn't have sex with him or anything, but you should know."

  "These were an accident?" He asked, his face twisting in anger.

  "How is this an accident?" He put his ha
nds over the bruises again.1

  "Someone grabbed me, but I made him stop." I said, in a whisper.

  "Was it the same person you cheated on me with?" He looked at me and blew air from the back of his throat in a huff.

  "Yes." I didn't want to lie anymore than I had to.

  "If you don't want me anymore, I understand, I messed up, big time, but I only think it's fair for you to know." I said, looking everywhere but at him.

  "You, thought telling me once I'm already here would be fair? How about you should have told me when it happened, and not let me waste my time coming here at all. Do you have any idea how hard it's been for me to stay faithful, but I have. I have because I love you Delilah." He rolled over on the bed and buried his head between his arms.3

  "Please don't cry, I'm sorry Chad, I really am." I said rubbing his back.

  "Do you even love me anymore Lyla?" He asked wiping his eyes dry and looking at me.

  I breathed out. I didn't want to say no, because I did love him, but I also didn't know if I was in love with him anymore, how could I say yes when I had thought I was in love with Jonas this morning.

  Even sitting here now I was wondering what Jonas was thinking about all of this. That wasn't fair to him.

  "Are you fucking serious? You don't love me Lyla? Who, I want to know who in the fuck it is that you're seeing, that's leaving fucking marks all over you!" He growled.

  "Is it one of your foster brothers? Be honest with me Lyla." He held his head and fresh tears started.

  "I can't tell you who it is Chad." I said in a whisper. "I can just tell you that it's over."

  "Do you even want me here?" He asked.

  "Yes, yes I do and I mean that. I just have so much to figure out, I'm such a mess right now, my family life, trying to figure out college. A teacher actually hit on me today." I huffed.

  "Is it a fucking teacher? That's fucking wrong and he's taking advantage of you Lyla. You need to report him!" He looked almost relieved at the fact that it may have been a teacher preying on my innocence, maybe that was an easier pill to swallow than me being with someone our age by my own accord.1

  "It's not, I mean it wasn't a teacher, but it's over." I said again. He grabbed my hand and rubbed it.

  "I do love you Lyla..." He finally said. "But right now, I really don't want to be around you. I need to take you home and think." He finished and it hit me in the gut. I understood though.

  I understood and was shocked that he'd even entertain the idea of a second chance.1

  The car ride was filled with silence as he drove me home. We pulled in and he looked over at me.

  "I love you Lyla, please don't make me regret this, but I can't break up with you."

  He shoved open his door and walked around to mine opening it for me. We walked to the door and I inhaled the slight smell of cigarette smoke.

  I looked up and saw a huge puff come from Jonas' window.1

  "They smoke?" Chad raised an eyebrow.

  "Not supposed to, but I guess..." I said back. please don't kiss me, please don't kiss me. He leaned in and brought his lips to mine, pulling me into him.1

  "I love you, we can work through this. Only a couple of months until we can be together again, and we have all weekend. I want to fix this." He looked into my eyes, with red swollen eyelids from crying and kissed me again.

  "I'll see you tomorrow Lyla." He held our heads together for a moment and then turned to walk away, at the same time the porch light came on.

  He stopped momentarily, looking back to see who had turned it on.

  Jonas stepped out, wearing only his sweat pants. He leaned against the post and crossed his arms over his chest.

  "Shame you have to go so soon." He said to Chad. "You just missed Lorna, she would have been shit company though... she was a bit preoccupied." He smirked and looked at me. Chad smiled, looking between the two of us.

  "What's your name again?" He asked, taking an uncomfortable step closer to the porch.

  "Jonas." He said uninterested. "And you?"

  "Chad."

  "Funny hadn't heard of you before." Jonas said, stepping toward me and wrapping an arm around my shoulder.

  "Well I better get my sister in the house before mum and dad get worried." He shot him one of his fuck you smirks, and started to guide me to the house.

  I looked at Chad wide eyed, and it was as if a light bulb had lit up.

  "You leave marks on her like that ever again, and I'll have no choice but to report you to the authorities." Chad stepped closer again, looking enraged.

  His hands fisted at his sides. Jonas grabbed my wrist and started pulling me to the door.5

  "Night Chaz!" He said casually over his shoulder, purposely saying his name wrong.

  I want you

  "What is wrong with you Jonas?" I grunted in a whisper, gritting my teeth together as we walked through the door.

  "You're early." Mom yelled from the kitchen.

  "Yes, I didn't feel good." I said, shooting Jonas a nasty look, that he returned. I ran up the stairs to my bedroom and slung myself into my bed.

  This was the worst situation I imagine one human could put themselves in. My door flung open and Jonas stood there.

  "Did I say you could come in here Jonas? Do I look like I want company... more specifically, your company. Get out now." I rolled over and drew the blanket up over my head.

  How could he possibly think this was the ideal time to talk after he'd just been such a dick. I heard my door shut and was thankful for the solitude my dark room provided.

  I let go and let the hurt from today make its way out of my eyes.

  My body convulsed, and I just let it. I laid there crying, for what felt like an hour, before deciding to take a shower and go to sleep for the night. I didn't want to deal with anyone in this house anymore today.

  I pulled the blanket off of my head and saw Jonas sitting on my futon watching me. "Why are you still here? I told you to leave." I barked, wiping tears from my cheeks, I sat up with an exaggerated huff.

  "I'm sorry I lied to you Lyla. I'm sorry I hurt you." He said, looking at me thoughtfully.

  "Well, it's too late Jonas. You've literally made a mess of everything and now my mom is going to find out and she's going to hate me." I said as I began to sob again.

  "Your mum is not going to hate you Princess. Your boyfriend probably isn't very fond of you right now, but your mum won't hate you, she'll most likely blame me." He said with a little laugh.

  "You didn't have to do that to Chad. He was already hurting. I had already told him that I'd cheated on him. He saw the marks you left on me." I rolled my eyes and buried my face in my hands.1

  "Did you tell him it was me, I thought we were keeping it a secret?" He asked, leaning in toward me.

  "No, you just made it perfectly obvious though, so thank you for that." I said softly in between tears.

  "How are you so much better than me in all of this Lyla...? You have a boyfriend. I didn't think you want anything between us when Lorna came to me. She was throwing herself at me. You have to know I wished it was you."

  He was right, but he didn't have to lie about it. If he would have told me the truth, none of this would have happened, because I wouldn't have let it.

  "You lied to me, Jonas, that's the difference." I said looking him in the eye.

  "You lied to your boyfriend, and besides... I lied to you because I wanted you. Not to get down your pants or whatever you said, because I want you and me to be together... I was falling in love with you then Lyla..." He moved to the bed beside me.

  "I can't hear this right now Jonas. I'm already so confused, and you had Lorna over here tonight again... I just don't believe you." I said, hating that he was telling me this right now, hating that somewhere inside of me I was filled with excitement that Jonas had just confessed that he was falling in love with me, hating that my will power was always rendered useless with just a few words from him that may or may not even be true.

&nbs
p; "She is tutoring me...remember, you set that up?" He said, nudging me with his elbow.

  "We sat at the table in the dining room talking with your mum the whole time. I made sure I had a witness this time." He winked at me and I forced a smiled back.1

  "I hate you so much Jonas." I said, laying my head against him.

  "I know you do... I'm sorry." He whispered at the top of my head, wrapping his hand around to the side of my face and comfortingly caressing it.

  Here we were again, together, just the two of us, and the truth was that I didn't hate him, not even a little bit, not even at all. I let him comfort me for a long time as we sat there silently.3

  "I'm not breaking up with him Jonas." I eventually said as I stood and grabbed my robe off of the hook on my bathroom door.

  Jonas laid back on my bed crossing his arms under his head and looking at me.1

  "You don't have to." He said, letting his eyes follow my movements. "He'll break up with you." He said, sitting up and sauntering over to me.

  I backed away from him, annoyed that he would just assume that Chad would dump me. "And I'll be there to pick up the pieces when he does."

  He winked at me grazing his hand over my side and letting it rest there, just above my hip.

  "Don't act like you don't want me too, you already told me that you did, it's just a matter of time Lyla... you're mine and you know it."

  "Jonas, I think you need to go... now!" I looked toward the door, though I felt my body melt into his touch, the warmth of his hand radiated through me, awakening whatever hungered within me to have him so close.

  He made no movement to leave and before I knew it, my body was flush against his. Like a magnet to metal that invisible force between he and I had pulled us together. There was no resisting the electrical charge between the two of us.

  "Just friends." He whispered as he brought his other hand up to my other side, mirroring the first, and pulled me a bit tighter against him.

  "Is this just friends to you Lyla? Is this what you want? He brushed his lips against mine and let his arms wrap behind my lower back pulling me against him so that I couldn't be held any tighter to him.