Love in Lockdown

by Chloe James

  ‘I know,’ I say soothingly. ‘It’s going to be wonderful.’

  ‘Then this morning I just woke up feeling terrible about it all.’

  ‘To be fair it was quite a heavy night of partying and you’re not as young as you were.’

  ‘Ha-ha.’ She attempts a watery smile. ‘It’s not that – it just suddenly hit me that you’re not going to be there or Mum, or any of my posse. You’re all my support team and I need you.’

  ‘But of course we’re going to be there; we’ll be more “there” than we would be if this were a normal wedding. This virtual ceremony means Mum and I can be with you from first thing in the morning, right through. We’ll be with you every step of the way.’

  ‘I guess.’ She perks up a little. ‘Still no hugs though.’

  ‘I know. It will have to be a virtual hug, whatever that is. You’ll get enough hugs from Zach to make up for all of us put together anyway.’

  ‘True.’ She smiles.

  ‘How’s he doing after the stag do?’

  ‘A bit worse for wear. I’ve hardly seen him today. But Henry has posted some very entertaining pics of him wearing a veil, a blonde wig and someone’s hideous purple bra (goodness knows who it belongs to) on social media. I’ve suggested he wears them on Saturday!’ Henry is Zach’s older brother who is currently out in New Zealand. He’s a marine biologist but is obviously having to stay in at the moment, leaving him plenty of time for sending dodgy outfits to his brother.

  ‘Classic – you’ll have to ping some across to me. I could do with a laugh.’

  ‘Be prepared, they’re eye-popping. And Henry says he has some other plans for the day itself. He’s making me really stressed to be honest. I’ve threatened him with some serious repercussions if he does anything awful.’

  ‘Yeah I can understand that. Henry’s idea of entertainment would be to get Zach’s ex-girlfriend to give a speech or something ridiculous.’

  ‘Don’t! He won’t, will he?’ She’s really agitated now.

  ‘Of course not – I’m only kidding. Are you sure you’re happy with my dress?’ I had plucked up my courage and shown Jess yesterday and she really liked it; in fact she took it all remarkably well.

  ‘Yes it’s beautiful; you look amazing in it. I’m so glad you’re going to be my bridesmaid.’

  ‘I know. It’s really exciting now. It’s going to be the most amazing wedding ever.’

  ‘I hope so.’

  ‘Seriously, it’s not often I say stuff like this, so put it in your diary, but you have done an incredible job and worked really hard. You’re pretty amazing.’

  ‘Thanks, hon,’ she says, glowing. ‘You’ve been helping me all the way.’

  ‘I’ve loved it.’ I wave a couple of bridal magazines at her.

  ‘Your turn next!’ She laughs, but her words hit home. The old hurts lurk ever near the surface. I can’t help thinking that in another perfect world where there really are happy ever afters, I would be marrying Ryan now.

  ‘Definitely not,’ I reply, shutting that line of conversation down at once.

  ‘I wish you would let Ollie be your virtual date for the wedding.’

  ‘I think I can do better than that, although I’m sure he’s a nice guy. I might even have a better option than Benny!’

  ‘I’m never going to live that down, am I?’

  ‘Absolutely not! Never.’

  ‘So who’s the guy?’ Jess asks, obviously dying from a mixture of curiosity and disbelief. ‘Am I going to get to see him?’

  ‘No he’s not going to be on the call but he’ll be really close.’

  ‘Don’t go all mysterious on me, Soph. Come on, spill.’

  ‘Okay, it’s Jack.’

  ‘Jack?’ She sounds really shocked.

  ‘From the flat upstairs.’

  ‘Oh my gosh, he’s your date? Sophia, there is a whole load of subplot I’ve missed here.’

  ‘There is, but you’ll have to wait. I’ve got some stuff to prepare for the kids tomorrow.’ There’s no way I want to give Jess a sniff of the fact this is kind of a fake date.

  ‘You can’t leave me like this …’

  ‘Bye, Jess, sorry – got to go. And stop worrying, it’s going to be amazing.’

  I get off the call smiling to myself. Sometimes I quite like the fact Jack hasn’t met Jess, or anyone else for that matter. It’s easier somehow, less complicated.

  I am really busy as in spite of Jess’s micromanaging of the perfect ceremony, there are a few things she doesn’t know about this wedding. I’ve been in touch with Zach and Henry and we have managed to collect some prerecorded messages from people who mean a lot to her. She knows our dad is giving a speech from the States, where he now lives with his family, but she doesn’t know her godmother is playing her favourite song on the violin, along with the other musicians in her quartet who are all going to join together on the video call. She wasn’t actually going to be able to make the original physical ceremony, so I’m hoping this will be even more special. I’m really excited about this wedding. There’s going to be surprises all round.

  Another part of my plan takes place the next day.

  ‘Can I paint whatever I like?’ asks Alfie.

  ‘Of course, as long as it’s something nice. The idea is to wish my sister Jess and her fiancé Zach a happy wedding day,’ I say. ‘And you’ve all worked so hard at your maths this morning, you deserve some fun time doing arts and crafts.’

  ‘I’ve got an idea,’ Alfie says dipping his brush in the paint and starting to make bold brushstrokes on the paper. I watch him, fascinated. I can’t believe how he’s come out of his shell the last few weeks; he really isn’t the same lad as he was as part of a class of thirty-two.

  ‘I’m going to paint some roses. Everyone loves flowers at a wedding,’ announces Freya.

  ‘Can’t we do something more interesting like cars, or my cat?’ Milo asks, looking disconsolately at Freya’s brightly coloured page.

  ‘Yes of course – you can do anything you like.’ I walk at a distance round Zane’s chair. ‘That’s nice, Zane, what are they?’

  ‘Chocolate cakes,’ he says.

  ‘Of course.’ I peer at the monstrous brown mountains. ‘They’re lovely and big aren’t they?’

  ‘That’s how I like them,’ he states. You can’t argue with that.

  ‘My goodness, these are lovely, Pritti.’ I stop transfixed and admire Pritti’s page, on which she’s created intricate flowers, which twirl artistically into a forest of swirls and scrolls.

  ‘I got the idea from henna tattoos – the bride normally has them painted on her hands but I thought I could do them as part of a picture,’ Pritti says.

  ‘They’re so elaborate – well done.’

  ‘Mum has sent my best dress for the filming,’ Freya says.

  ‘I’m going to wear my Spider-Man outfit,’ Milo adds, not to be beaten.

  ‘Sounds awesome – every wedding needs a visit from Spider-Man for luck and I’m really looking forward to seeing your dress, Freya.’ That’s the great thing about a virtual wedding: it really doesn’t matter what these kids wear. They had the idea of doing a big picture for Jess, so I suggested that – as it has to be done whilst staying two metres apart – they each paint their own picture and I’ll join them all together. Part of my surprise for Jess is to make a video of the kids presenting their paintings and they are so excited.

  ‘Just like on the Zoom screen, all the wedding guests will be apart but their images will all come together to make one big audience,’ I had explained to the kids. And that’s how I like to think of it. We may all be socially distanced but tomorrow on the screen and in spirit, we are all going to be together.

  Chapter 16

  Jack

  It’s strange to be wearing a suit again. Having slobbed around the flat in tracksuit bottoms and comfortable T-shirts until now, I’m actually looking quite smart. Even the hair’s not bad. Well, not that bad anyway. I rummage about
in the bottom of the cupboard for my best shoes. I don’t remember the last time I wore them. I’ve been in for three weeks and four days now. This lockdown definitely plays with your brain. It feels like a time bubble, which in some ways has gone on for ages; in others, time feels like it’s going really quickly. Maybe time is playing tricks with my brain, or what’s left of it.

  I saw this psychiatrist on television the other day who said it was because if you do the same thing every day, time feels as though it’s going quicker because there’s nothing to distinguish the days. That’s a depressing thought, but not for me any more, somehow I now have a purpose and it feels good.

  I check my WhatsApp. Thanks so much for the call today, mate; it was like old times. Next time I’ll make sure I have a beer at the ready and we’ll go through some song suggestions for next Wednesday. Bertie

  I enjoyed it, I reply. Have some ideas already. Let us know what shopping you need. Sophia’s got a team of people to pick stuff up.

  As I’m typing another message bings in:

  Let me know if you need anything from the shop. I’m also making you some meringues. I heard you have a sweet tooth. Anna xx

  This is definitely getting disturbing. I do have a sweet tooth, but how does she know that? I ignore her for now.

  Nice talking to you yesterday. I have the sheet music for Elton John’s ‘I’m Still Standing’. Any good? Mavis

  I loved chatting too – yes that’s a great song. Everyone’s bound to know that, I reply. Looking forward to it!

  My phone rings suddenly, making me jump as I’m staring at it. It’s Sam on FaceTime. I answer.

  ‘Hey, I was looking for Jack. Is he in?’ Sam asks, his face deadpan.

  ‘Ha blimming ha, I don’t look that different.’

  ‘You look like a different guy and you’re acting like one too. What’s with the suit?’

  ‘I’m helping Sophia out with her sister’s virtual wedding,’ I reply.

  ‘With that hair cut?’ He grins.

  ‘No it’s okay. I’m not going on screen.’

  ‘So why bother with the suit?’

  ‘Helps me play the part,’ I say, brushing a couple of stray bits of fluff off my jacket.

  ‘You look good. Have you got some champers at the ready?’

  ‘Actually I have. Sophia bought me a bottle of fizz.’

  ‘I was joking. Blimey, does this girl think of everything?’

  ‘Do you know, I really think she does. Anyway I’d better go. I don’t want to be late for her.’ Whilst talking I’ve been rushing round the flat, grabbing my comb and running it through my hair one last time before I go back out.

  ‘Mate, you’ve really got it bad.’ He puts me on to Carrie who’s happily kicking while lying on her baby mat. ‘Carrie and I wish you luck, and Tina does too.’

  Tina comes into view. ‘Hi, Jack, hey you look good!’ She’s a little too surprised for the compliment to be flattering. ‘Are you off somewhere?’

  ‘No – long story.’

  ‘By the way, I like the sound of this Sophia.’ She raises her eyebrows suggestively. ‘She sounds fab.’

  ‘I know,’ I say. She is too. It doesn’t matter how much I try to deny it to myself, I am totally smitten with her.

  Chapter 17

  Sophia

  This is it! The day of Jess’s wedding and I can’t believe it’s here already. From all that time ago, when we started looking at dresses and venues, flowers and music choices, it’s all gone so quickly. Yet in other ways it seems another lifetime we were in the bridal shop trying on dresses. This world we live in now is totally different. I give myself a little shake; today is not the day to be brooding about things. Jess needs me to be on top form, helping her to have the best wedding ever.

  I dial her number on FaceTime. ‘Sophia!’ she answers, raising a glass of bubbly to the screen.

  ‘Hey, looks like you’re having a good start to the day!’ I laugh. ‘Where’s mine?’

  ‘You’ve got to join me – come on, open some, it’s not that early.’ I meander to the fridge and pull out a bottle I’d put there ready yesterday. It’s a funny thing, but I love the way we don’t usually drink at certain times in normal life (whatever that is, I can’t actually remember any more) and then when it comes to Christmas, weddings, christenings and other special occasions, suddenly it’s perfectly fine to drink champagne at eight o’clock in the morning.

  ‘Cheers,’ I say raising my glass. ‘Happy Wedding Day to my favourite sister!’

  ‘I’m your only sister!’ she remarks. ‘Cheers, here’s to it!’ She takes a sip. ‘I can’t believe it, it’s actually sunny. The weather’s been dry for so long, I was so worried today it would finally rain.’

  I peer out the window. ‘Blue sky, hardly any clouds – it looks perfect. How’s the gazebo looking?’

  Jess takes the phone to the window and shows me the view. I can see down into her small city garden, where a white gazebo with intricate lace design topped with sheer white swathes of fabric sweeps back to reveal a couple of big screens, on either side are pots of sweet peas, lilies and roses, a mass of stunning blooms on a long table, which also has photos on it.

  ‘Wow, Jess, that looks incredible!’ It really does, I never imagined anything so lovely.

  ‘I know, didn’t the team do a tremendous job!’

  ‘They did. I’m so amazed; I had no idea there were people out there who set up tech for virtual weddings.’

  ‘I guess it’s become a thing now.’

  ‘You always were a trendsetter! Is Zach safely out of the way?’

  ‘Yes I haven’t seen him since yesterday, which has been really difficult to pull off in our house as you can imagine. He slept in the spare room and then this morning I said I’d eat first thing and then be up here out of the way, getting ready.’

  ‘I don’t know how you do it, Jess. You think of everything.’

  Over much giggling, more champagne and plenty of banter, I help Jess with her make-up. Luckily she is pretty good by herself; I’m acting in more of an advisory capacity.

  A couple of hours fly past and it is nearly time for the ceremony. Jess has her computer in the corner with me on Zoom so I can see a full-length view of her in her wedding dress. ‘You look simply gorgeous,’ I say. ‘That dress fits you to perfection.’

  ‘I do feel pretty good.’ She twirls in front of the mirror.

  ‘Okay, I’m going to join the ceremony now – and, Jess?’

  ‘Yeah?’ She turns and looks at me, her tiara sparkling in the midday sunlight.

  ‘Enjoy it. This is your moment.’

  ‘Thanks, Soph, for everything.’ I touch the screen as does she, our fingers meeting but not meeting and that has to be the best we can do for now.

  I log out and then try to log into the Zoom ceremony. Oh for goodness’ sake. I try to copy and paste the password and the whole computer jams.

  ‘Jack?’ I call. The balcony door has been open all morning so we can easily talk to each other. ‘How are you doing?’

  ‘Hey,’ he replies. ‘Everything okay? You all set?’

  ‘No, I can’t log into the ceremony.’

  ‘Oh no, that’s a nightmare! Haven’t you got the password?’

  ‘Yes, but it’s all jammed.’

  ‘Just log out the whole thing and turn your laptop off for a minute. And take a breath.’

  ‘Yeah I am a bit stressed.’ I turn off the computer and take another sip of champagne. ‘Have you got a drink ready for the toast?’

  ‘Yep I’ve opened my Cava ready and checked it for quality control.’

  ‘It’s pretty good isn’t it?’

  ‘Is it working?’

  ‘Just a minute, I’m logging back in … yes, oh thank goodness, I’m in.’

  ‘Well done.’

  ‘I’m glad you’re here, Jack, or I’d be totally panicking.’

  I turn back to the screen. ‘Oh, here’s Sophia. What kept you? We thought you weren�
�t going to make it!’ It’s my dad, lounging on a very nice outdoor sofa in the California sun, next to his new wife and stepdaughter, all looking sickeningly tanned.

  ‘Thanks, Dad, had some technical issues. Hi, Karen and Sarah! Wow you have some serious sunshine out there.’ I notice Zach on the main screen, waiting nervously in the gazebo. ‘Hey, Zach, you’re looking really smart.’

  He smiles shyly, fiddling with his tie. ‘Is she nearly ready? I’m getting so nervous.’

  Everyone laughs; I just can’t believe all the tiny screens, which are filled with smiling and familiar faces. It’s moving actually, a chequerboard of supportive people. Mum is gorgeous in a floral dress and an amazing hat. ‘Mum, you look beautiful!’

  ‘So do you,’ she comments, coming far too close to the screen and bashing her nose. ‘Oops, I can’t ever get used to these things. That dress is perfect on you. Just a minute, Uncle Jim’s having trouble getting on the screen.’ She’s got the mobile attached to her ear. ‘Look, Jim, if you press on the screen it should work. Didn’t Fern sort it for you?’ Fern is Uncle Jim’s long-suffering carer who pops in a couple of times a week to help. I think she deserves a medal; she’s such a lovely person and seems really fond of him. ‘What do you mean she did it and now it’s gone?’

  Zoom works really well when it’s just one or two of you, but I’m finding when there’s a few people – and in this case I think there must be about a hundred of us – it’s really awkward. For a start, you never know when to speak and end up either talking at the same time as someone else, or not saying anything and sitting mute throughout the whole thing, which kind of defeats the purpose of being on the call at all. Also, it is meant to pick up the person who’s talking and zoom in on them (in fact, good point, is this why it’s called Zoom?) which is fine when that makes sense but not when it goes onto someone totally random. Which it does right now. Without warning the whole screen goes to Uncle Jim’s flat. I can kind of tell it is because no one else has net curtains like that and cushions with clowns on. But oh no, we’re getting a close-up view of an old lady who’s adjusting her skirt and pants in the bathroom.