Masters of the Theatre

by Delphi Classics

  That, standing on my guard, I might relate

  My warrantable love. Ha! what means this? [seeing the dagger]

  DUCHESS: He left this with me.

  ANTONIO: And it seems, did wish

  You would use it on yourself.

  DUCHESS: His action seem’d to intend so much.

  ANTONIO: This hath a handle to’t

  As well as a point. Turn it towards him,

  And so fasten the keen edge in his rank gall.

  How now? Who knocks? More earthquakes?

  DUCHESS: I stand

  As if a mine beneath my feet were ready

  To be blown up.

  CARIOLA: ’Tis Bosola.

  DUCHESS: Away!

  O misery, methinks unjust actions

  Should wear these masks and curtains, and not we.

  You must instantly part hence. I have fashion’d it already.

  Exit ANTONIO, enter BOSOLA

  BOSOLA: The duke your brother is ta’en up in a whirlwind,

  Hath took horse, and’s rid post to Rome.

  DUCHESS: So late?

  BOSOLA: He told me, as he mounted into th’ saddle,

  You were undone.

  DUCHESS: Indeed, I am very near it.

  BOSOLA: What’s the matter?

  DUCHESS: Antonio, the master of our household,

  Hath dealt so falsely with me in’s accounts:

  My brother stood engag’d with me for money

  Ta’en up of certain Neapolitan Jews,

  And Antonio lets the bonds be forfeit.

  BOSOLA: Strange: [aside] this is cunning.

  DUCHESS: And hereupon

  My brother’s bills at Naples are protested

  Against. Call up our officers.

  BOSOLA: I shall.

  Exit BOSOLA, enter ANTONIO

  DUCHESS: The place that you must fly to is Ancona.

  Hire a house there; I’ll send after you

  My treasure and my jewels. Our weak safety

  Runs upon enginous wheels; short syllables

  Must stand for periods. I must now accuse you

  Of such a feigned crime, as Tasso calls

  Magnanima mensogna, a noble lie,

  ‘Cause it must shield our honors. Hark, they are coming.

  Enter BOSOLA and Gentlemen

  ANTONIO: Will your grace hear me?

  DUCHESS: I have got well by you; you have yielded me

  A million of loss. I am like to inherit

  The people’s curses for your stewardship.

  You had the trick in audit-time to be sick,

  Till I had sign’d your Quietus, and that cur’d you

  Without help of a doctor. Gentlemen,

  I would have this man be an example to you all,

  So shall you hold my favour. I pray, let him,

  For h’as done that, alas! you would not think of,

  And because I intend to be rid of him,

  I mean not to publish. Use your fortune elsewhere.

  ANTONIO: I am strongly arm’d to brook my overthrow,

  As commonly men bear with a hard year.

  I will not blame the cause on’t but do think

  The necessity of my malevolent star

  Procures this, not her humour. O, the inconstant

  And rotten ground of service, you may see;

  ’Tis even like him, that in a winter night,

  Takes a long slumber o’er a dying fire,

  As loath to part from’t, yet parts thence as cold,

  As when he first sat down.

  DUCHESS: We do confiscate,

  Towards the satisfying of your accounts,

  All that you have.

  ANTONIO: I am all yours, and ’tis very fit

  All mine should be so.

  DUCHESS: So, sir, you have your pass.

  ANTONIO: You may see, gentlemen, what ’tis to serve

  A prince with body and soul.

  Exit ANTONIO

  BOSOLA: Here’s an example for extortion: what moisture

  Is drawn out of the sea, when foul weather comes,

  Pours down, and runs into the sea again.

  DUCHESS: I would know what are your opinions

  Of this Antonio.

  2 OFFICER: He could not abide to see a pig’s head gaping.

  I thought your grace would find him a Jew.

  3 OFFICER: I would you had been his officer, for your own sake.

  4 OFFICER: He stopped his ears with black wool, and to

  those came to him for money, said he was thick of hearing.

  2 OFFICER: Some said he was an hermaphrodite, for

  he could not abide a woman.

  4 OFFICER: How scurvy proud he would look, when the

  treasury was full! well, let him go.

  1 OFFICER: Yes, and the chippings of the buttery fly

  after him, to scour his gold chain.

  DUCHESS: Leave us. [they exit]

  What do you think of these?

  BOSOLA: That these are rogues, that in’s prosperity,

  But to have waited on his fortune, could have wish’d

  His dirty stirrup riveted through their noses,

  And follow’d after’s mule, like a bear in a ring;

  Would have prostituted their daughters to his lust;

  Made their first-born intelligencers; thought none happy

  But such as were born under his blest planet,

  And wore his livery: and do these lice drop off now?

  Well, never look to have the like again.

  He hath left a sort of flattering rogues behind him;

  Their doom must follow. Princes pay flatterers

  In their own money: flatterers dissemble their vices,

  And they dissemble their lies; that’s justice.

  Alas, poor gentleman!

  DUCHESS: Poor! He hath amply fill’d his coffers.

  BOSOLA: Sure he was too honest. Pluto, the god of riches,

  When he’s sent by Jupiter to any man,

  He goes limping, to signify that wealth

  That comes on God’s name, comes slowly; but when he’s sent

  On the devil’s errand, he rides post and comes in by scuttles.

  Let me show you what a most unvalued jewel

  You have in a wanton humour thrown away,

  To bless the man shall find him. He was an excellent

  Courtier, and most faithful; a soldier, that thought it

  As beastly to know his own value too little,

  As devilish to acknowledge it too much.

  Both his virtue and form deserv’d a far better fortune.

  His discourse rather delighted to judge itself than show itself.

  His breast was fill’d with all perfection,

  And yet it seemed a private whispering-room,

  It made so little noise of’t.

  DUCHESS: But he was basely descended.

  BOSOLA: Will you make yourself a mercenary herald

  Rather to examine men’s pedigrees than virtues?

  You shall want him;

  For know, an honest statesman to a prince

  Is like a cedar planted by a spring:

  The spring bathes the tree’s root, the grateful tree

  Rewards it with his shadow. You have not done so.

  I would sooner swim to the Bermoothes on

  Two politicians’ rotten bladders, tied

  Together with an intelligencer’s heart-string,

  Than depend on so changeable a prince’s favour.

  Fare thee well, Antonio, since the malice of the world

  Would needs down with thee, it cannot be said yet

  That any ill happened unto thee,

  Considering thy fall was accompanied with virtue.

  DUCHESS: O, you render me excellent music!

  BOSOLA: Say you?

  DUCHESS: This good one that you speak of, is my husband.

  BOSOLA: Do I not dream? Can this ambitious age

 
Have so much goodness in’t as to prefer

  A man merely for worth, without these shadows

  Of wealth and painted honors? possible?

  DUCHESS: I have had three children by him.

  BOSOLA: Fortunate lady!

  For you have made your private nuptial bed

  The humble and fair seminary of peace.

  No question but many an unbenefic’d scholar

  Shall pray for you for this deed, and rejoice

  That some preferment in the world can yet

  Arise from merit. The virgins of your land

  That have no dowries shall hope your example

  Will raise them to rich husbands. Should you want

  Soldiers, ’twould make the very Turks and Moors

  Turn Christians, and serve you for this act.

  Last, the neglected poets of your time,

  In honor of this trophy of a man

  Rais’d by that curious engine, your white hand,

  Shall thank you in your grave for’t, and make that

  More reverend than all the cabinets

  Of living princes. For Antonio,

  His fame shall likewise flow from many a pen,

  When heralds shall want coats to sell to men.

  DUCHESS: As I taste comfort in this friendly speech,

  So would I find concealment.

  BOSOLA: O, the secret of my prince,

  Which I will wear on th’ inside of my heart.

  DUCHESS: You shall take charge of all my coin and jewels,

  And follow him; for he retires himself

  To Ancona.

  BOSOLA: So.

  DUCHESS: Whither, within few days,

  I mean to follow thee.

  BOSOLA: Let me think:

  I would wish your grace to feign a pilgrimage

  To Our Lady of Loretto, scarce seven leagues

  From fair Ancona; so may you depart

  Your country with more honor, and your flight

  Will seem a princely progress, retaining

  Your usual train about you.

  DUCHESS: Sir, your direction

  Shall lead me by the hand.

  CARIOLA: In my opinion,

  She were better progress to the baths at Lucca,

  Or go visit the Spa

  In Germany: for, if you will believe me,

  I do not like this jesting with religion,

  This feigned pilgrimage.

  DUCHESS: Thou art a superstitious fool.

  Prepare us instantly for our departure.

  Past sorrows, let us moderately lament them,

  For those to come, seek wisely to prevent them.

  Exit DUCHESS and CARIOLA

  BOSOLA: A politician is the devil’s quilted anvil;

  He fashions all sins on him, and the blows

  Are never heard. He may work in a lady’s chamber,

  As here for proof. What rests but I reveal

  All to my lord? O, this base quality

  Of intelligencer! Why, every quality i’th’ world

  Prefers but gain or commendation.

  Now, for this act I am certain to be rais’d,

  And men that paint weeds to the life are prais’d.

  Exit

  ACT III, SCENE III

  The CARDINAL’S palace in Rome

  Enter CARDINAL, FERDINAND, MALATESTE, PESCARA, DELIO, and SILVIO

  CARDINAL: Must we turn soldier then?

  MALATESTE: The emperor,

  Hearing your worth that way, ere you attain’d

  This reverend garment, joins you in commission

  With the right fortunate soldier, the Marquis of Pescara,

  And the famous Lannoy.

  CARDINAL: He that had the honor

  Of taking the French king prisoner?

  MALATESTE: The same.

  Here’s a plot drawn for a new fortification

  At Naples.

  The CARDINAL and MALATESTE turn aside to study the plans

  FERDINAND: This great count Malateste, I perceive,

  Hath got employment.

  DELIO: No employment, my lord;

  A marginal note in the muster-book, that he is

  A voluntary lord.

  FERDINAND: He’s no soldier?

  DELIO: He has worn gunpowder in’s hollow tooth, for the tooth-ache.

  SILVIO: He comes to the leaguer with a full intent

  To eat fresh beef and garlic, means to stay

  Till the scent be gone, and straight return to court.

  DELIO: He hath read all the late service,

  As the City Chronicle relates it,

  And keeps two pewterers going, only to express

  Battles in model.

  SILVIO: Then he’ll fight by the book.

  DELIO: By the almanac, I think,

  To choose good days, and shun the critical.

  That’s his mistress’ scarf.

  SILVIO: Yes, he protests

  He would do much for that taffata.

  DELIO: I think he would run away from a battle,

  To save it from taking prisoner.

  SILVIO: He is horribly afraid

  Gunpowder will spoil the perfume on’t.

  DELIO: I saw a Dutchman break his pate once

  For calling him pot-gun; he made his head

  Have a bore in’t like a musket.

  SILVIO: I would he had made a touchhole to’t.

  He is indeed a guarded sumpter-cloth,

  Only for the remove of the court.

  Enter BOSOLA

  PESCARA: Bosola arriv’d? What should be the business?

  Some falling out amongst the cardinals.

  These factions amongst great men, they are like

  Foxes, when their heads are divided,

  They carry fire in their tails, and all the country

  About them goes to wrack for’t.

  SILVIO: What’s that Bosola?

  DELIO: I knew him in Padua; a fantastical scholar,

  Like such who study to know how many knots was in

  Hercules’ club, of what colour Achilles’ beard was,

  Or whether Hector were not troubled

  With the tooth-ache.

  He hath studied himself half blear-eyed to know

  The true symmetry of Caesar’s nose by a shoeing-horn; and this

  He did to gain the name of a speculative man.

  PESCARA: Mark prince Ferdinand:

  A very salamander lives in’s eye,

  To mock the eager violence of fire.

  SILVIO: That Cardinal hath made more bad faces with his

  oppression than ever Michael Angelo made good ones. He

  lifts up’s nose, like a foul porpoise before a storm.

  PESCARA: The Lord Ferdinand laughs.

  DELIO: Like a deadly cannon

  That lightens ere it smokes.

  PESCARA: These are your true pangs of death,

  The pangs of life, that struggle with great statesmen.

  DELIO: In such a deformed silence, witches whisper their charms.

  ACT III, SCENE IV

  Enter TWO PILGRIMS to the Shrine of Our Lady of Loretto

  FIRST PILGRIM: I have not seen a goodlier shrine than this,

  Yet I have visited many.

  SECOND PILGRIM: The cardinal of Arragon

  Is this day to resign his cardinal’s hat.

  His sister duchess likewise is arriv’d

  To pay her vow of pilgrimage. I expect

  A noble ceremony.

  FIRST PILGRIM: No question. They come.

  Here the ceremony of the Cardinal’s installment, in the habit

  of a soldier, performed in delivering up his cross, hat, robes,

  and ring, at the shrine, and investing him with sword, helmet,

  shield, and spurs: then Antonio, the Duchess, and their

  children, having presented themselves at the shrine, are, by a

  form of banishment in dumb-show expressed towards them
by

  the Cardinal and the state of Ancona, banished. During all

  which ceremony, this ditty is sung to very solemn music, by

  divers churchmen, and then exit:

  Arms and honors deck thy story

  To thy fame’s eternal glory.

  Adverse fortune ever fly thee;

  No disastrous fate come nigh thee.

  I alone will sing thy praises,

  Whom to honor virtue raises;

  And thy study, that divine is,

  Bent to martial discipline is.

  Lay aside all those robes lie by thee;

  Crown thy arts with arms, they’ll beautify thee.

  O, worthy of worthiest name, adorn’d in this manner,

  Lead bravely thy forces on, under war’s warlike banner!

  O, may’st thou prove fortunate in all martial courses!

  Guide thou still by skill in arts and forces.

  Victory attend thee nigh, whilst fame sings loud thy powers;

  Triumphant conquest crown thy head, and blessings pour down showers!

  (The author disclaims this ditty to be his)

  FIRST PILGRIM: Here’s a strange turn of state. Who would have thought

  So great a lady would have match’d herself

  Unto so mean a person? Yet the cardinal

  Bears him much too cruel.

  SECOND PILGRIM: They are banish’d.

  FIRST PILGRIM: But I would ask what power hath this state

  Of Ancona, to determine of a free prince?

  SECOND PILGRIM: They are a free state, sir, and her brother show’d

  How that the Pope fore-hearing of her looseness,

  Hath seiz’d into the protection of the church

  The dukedom, which she held as dowager.

  FIRST PILGRIM: But by what justice?

  SECOND PILGRIM: Sure I think by none,

  Only her brother’s instigation.

  FIRST PILGRIM: What was it with such violence he took

  Off from her finger?

  SECOND PILGRIM: ’Twas her wedding ring,

  Which he vow’d shortly he would sacrifice

  To his revenge.

  FIRST PILGRIM: Alas, Antonio!

  If that a man be thrust into a well,

  No matter who sets hand to’t, his own weight

  Will bring him sooner to th’ bottom. Come, let’s hence.

  Fortune makes this conclusion general,

  All things do help th’ unhappy man to fall.

  They exit

  ACT III, SCENE V

  On a road near Loretto

  Enter DUCHESS, ANTONIO, CHILDREN, CARIOLA and SERVANTS

  DUCHESS: Banish’d Ancona?

  ANTONIO: Yes, you see what power

  Lightens in great men’s breath.

  DUCHESS: Is all our train

  Shrunk to this poor remainder?

  ANTONIO: These poor men,

  Which have got little in service, vow