by Coralee June
Ryker stretched and winced a bit. “It took me a little longer to get here. I lived with Gav in New York for a couple years. It's pretty here. I like the Sunshine,” he replied cryptically, his eyes locking in on mine with unspoken meaning.
“I’m so sorry, Ryker,” I said in a broken tone. “I never would have left if it wasn’t important.”
“You gonna tell me who you’re running from?”
“Yes,” I began while sucking in some air. “But Gavriel gave me two days before I have to say anything, and I’m going to make the most of them.”
I stood and stripped out of my clothes, not bothering to be modest. I was a confident person. And after our rendezvous in the bathroom, I didn't feel it necessary to at least pretend to want privacy. Ryker's gaze hovered over each inch of my creamy skin, as I made my way over to the connecting bathroom.
While the powerful water fell down my back, I thought about the men that crashed back through my life.
Gavriel wanted to control me.
Blaise wanted to see me.
Callum wanted to save me.
Ryker wanted to punish me.
Some things had never changed. Their personality traits became amplified over the years. When I was a teen, Gavriel was just as bossy. He ordered us around, and he was good at it. Back in Chesterbrook, I saw Blaise the most. He'd always find excuses to be near me. I'd even catch his gaze hot and heavy on my neck in the school hallways.
Ryker has always been my bittersweet Bullet. He felt things deeper than the others. He was intense. He wanted me to be stronger but knew that strength came at a price. I wasn't quite sure if we were on better terms yet, but I knew that he saw my pain.
As far as Callum? I thought he showed up to our house all those times because he craved a sense of family. Looking back, I knew better. Callum saw the writing on the wall. He saw the toxic nature of my family, and he showed up night after night out of a sense of obligation. He wanted to protect me. Even if it was a subconscious decision, I knew that that was why he was there.
I wanted to get to a place where we were better. I knew that it would take a lot of work. We wouldn't be the same group we were back in Chesterbrook. But also, there was potential here. This was my chance to not only regain the time we’d lost but seek out an opportunity to claim so much more.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Present day
* * *
The dress Gavriel picked out for me was short, form-fitting, and black. It hugged each of my curves, and a trim of lace gathered around my cleavage, giving the illusion of lingerie peeking through the neckline. I blushed when he presented it to me an hour ago, and when he handed it to me, our fingers grazed as he dragged his eyes up and down my body, likely imagining me in the dress he handpicked.
I’d spent most the day napping with Ryker. We didn't say much, not that there was much to say. The kind of wounds we had could only be healed by spending time together. And since I was going with Gavriel back to New York in just a couple days, time was a luxury we didn't have.
I sent one of Gavriel's guards to the drugstore to buy black hair dye. I figured that as long as I was under Gavriel’s protection, there was no use continuing to put bleached highlights in my hair. For tonight, I wanted to look like the girl they once knew.
When I walked downstairs, all four guys were standing in the entryway. It felt cliche as hell, me descending the stairs and feeling like a slutty princess. Their eyes locked on me as my heels clicked against the marble tile.
Blaise gave me a blinding smile and immediately walked up to me once I hit the bottom step. He touched me and let out a slow sigh. "Wow, Gav," he began while lightly tracing the line of lace around my collarbone. "We should've brought you shopping with us." He leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek before saying, "You look beautiful, Babe."
I returned his smile then took in his casual appearance. Fitted slacks and a white, button-down shirt donned his muscular frame. The strands of his brown hair were wet, as if he’d just showered. “You don’t look too bad yourself,” I whispered, biting my lip. Blaise always dressed like a rock star, but today he looked refined and delicious.
I walked over to Gavriel and gave him a timid smile, feeling a bit nervous about what he thought of my dress. For some reason, his approval meant more to me than the others. I wanted him to see that I was trying to please him.
"I'm glad you went back to your natural hair color," he said while brushing his knuckles along my hips. “It really is you.”
Gavriel hadn't put on his button-up shirt yet. His undershirt left little to the imagination, and I traced a fingernail along his tattoos. “Have I mentioned how much I love your ink?” I asked. I felt an extreme awareness of his skin on mine and took a deep breath. He in turn began tracing the rose along my forearm.
“I love yours, too. It suits you,” he replied. I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder and inhaling his vanilla scent. Gav’s lips touched my ear as he whispered, “I can’t wait to show you the rest of mine.”
My pulse raced as I thought of exploring the swirls of black ink along Gavriel’s naked, tan body. I hummed with anticipation and wondered when I’d get the chance to see more of the dips and grooves of his muscles. His phone began vibrating in his pocket, and he pulled away to answer it in the kitchen.
Ryker was sitting on the entryway bench, and he stood with a grunt before making his way over to me. I entwined my fingers with his, smiling a little when his thumb grazed over the bullet ring I was wearing. He, too, seemed to realize what he was touching, and he brought my hand up to his lips before kissing the metal.
"I'm surprised you still have this," Ryker said, his voice was husky. I took in his black suit and tight smile. The bruises on his face were dark but didn't distract from his rugged handsomeness. Even though his tie was perfect, I pretended to straighten it, seeking the excuse to touch his broad chest.
"It's one of the few things I kept from my time in Chesterbrook." I'll never forget the day the Bullets handed me this sentimental ring. I got it the night before I left. Even in my darkest moments, it was a constant reminder that someone, somewhere once loved me.
“I often wondered if you kept it,” Ryker said. He had a faraway look in his eyes that reflected the pain of my disappearance.
“It’s a part of me, you’re a part of me,” I whispered in response before pulling away.
I bolstered up enough courage to make my way over to Callum and smiled when I saw the fire in his gaze. It was odd seeing him in a tailored suit, fit perfectly around his tapered silhouette. His blond hair looked trimmed, and I wondered if he had gotten it cut while I was napping today. His blue eyes seemed bright and hooded as he took in my long legs and the black pumps covering my feet.
I wanted to lean in and kiss his plump lips but didn't want to push him too far. Callum wasn't willing to share me. Even though I wasn't sure about the others’ intentions, I wanted to respect his wishes.
"You look beautiful, Summer," he said, his voice hoarse. It didn't escape me that he used my usual name instead of the nickname the Bullets had coined.
"Thanks, Callum." I grabbed his hand, squeezing a bit in a last-ditch effort to show him that I appreciated him. His tight expression softened a bit, but he still felt distant.
The drive to The Rose was short. Located right on the ocean, the walk up to the front doors was covered in sand. I removed my heels to navigate the gritty, sinking sand. Guards flanked us on both sides as we entered, Joe in the lead. The bouncer at the door nodded once when Gavriel approached. I expected to see a sweaty dance floor with loud music and swaying bodies, but instead was greeted with a lounge area with plum carpet. Black booths lined the walls, and there was a bar in the far corner with lights roped around the bartop. Expansive windows were behind the bar, showing off the crashing waves outside.
It looked more like a country club than a dance club. A woman wearing a black, lace mask stalked towards us and took her time disrobing the jackets of
each of my guys. I gritted my teeth as her long fingers grazed their arm muscles.
"I thought this was a dance club?" I asked.
Blaise gave me a small smile and grabbed my wrist, leading me towards one of the booths closest to the window. It overlooked the night sky and the rocking waves below. I was briefly reminded of our beach party back in Chesterbrook. The bonfire on the sandy banks of the lake paled in comparison to the posh bar overlooking the ocean now. A man in a suit was sitting at the booth, and Gavriel left me for a moment to go talk to him. Blaise quickly took his spot beside me and whispered in my ear, "We weren't completely honest with you, Babe." I shuddered as his husky voice traveled down my exposed skin. "It's a club, yes. But it's a little more exclusive than your average dance club. The clientele have…particular…tastes. It’s a sex club."
At first, I felt anxious. Then I felt wild jealousy. How often did the guys come here? We didn't have labels or commitments, so I couldn't help but wonder if they had plans here that didn't include me. My face must've soured because Blaise quickly added, "We don't have to do anything." He gave me a tender kiss on the lips before continuing. "I would love to do this with you, I've been thinking about it all day. But your comfort is my number one priority. We're here because Gavriel had some business to attend to. That's it. But if you want something else to happen, Babe, you just say the word."
I let out a sigh of relief when I realized that Blaise wanted me. I hated the trickles of insecurities that were still evident in my mind. I couldn't help but think back to my time in Chesterbrook. The guys were always surrounded by adoring girls that were wanting to tame them. I might have grown more confident, sexually, but so had they.
It wasn't fair to feel jealous. I was the one that left. And even so, we never established that sort of relationship. My night with Ryker was hot and intense, but I didn't think we would have ever become exclusive. Even if I had stayed, I knew nothing would've come from it. He was going to LA.
"Do you come here often?" I giggled then, realizing my question sounded like a cheesy pickup line.
"Gavriel does a lot of business here when he’s in town. I've been a few times, but I've never been more excited to be a member than I am right now."
A blush flooded my cheeks as Blaise grabbed my hand and jetted it towards his hard erection. He gave me his signature cocky smile before asking, "Do you feel that?" I shuddered as he pressed me harder into him. "I want you. Only you can make me feel this way."
Before I could respond, Gavriel made his way back over, smirking at where my hand was. I pulled away as Callum and Ryker joined us. They all huddled around me. "Lucas won't be here until later. He has a room reserved at midnight, which means we have a couple hours to kill." Gavriel's voice was all business as he burned his gaze across my creamy skin.
I heard the suggestion in his tone. That, coupled with what I knew about The Rose, made me think of all the things we could do with a couple spare hours. Callum spoke up, "I'll take a seat at the bar and keep an eye out in case he decides to come early.”
"I've got men for that," Gavriel said with a wave of his hand. "How about you actually enjoy yourself for once, hmm?"
I leaned into Gavriel, praying he didn't push Callum any further. He was already on edge and ready to bolt. Gavriel leaned in to whisper something in Blaise's ear. Blaise gave me a wicked smile before they both addressed me. "I'm going to give you a tour of the place, Sunshine," Gav said while pulling me away from the others. Ryker looked like he wanted to argue, but Blaise elbowed him in his bruised side, making him moan.
"Go," Blaise said with a mischievous grin. "Take a look around, we'll catch up to you later."
The club wasn't that big. Two halls led off from the main lounge, and a procession of doors lined the walls.
"Each door leads to a bedroom. Each room has a view of the ocean; there's something about the water that draws me in."
I thought back once again to our time at the Jamesons’ houseboat. It was my first party. My first step into freedom, and my last night with the Bullets. I wondered if that was why Gavriel had always loved the water. Did it remind him of me?
"Do you come to Los Angeles often?" I asked. A part of me wanted to know if I would be seeing Ryker again soon.
"I travel frequently. If you want to see Ryker, Love, all you have to do is ask." Gavriel paused at a door at the end of the hall and opened it with the key card he produced from his pocket. I followed him inside. A light flickered on, revealing a large room with a king-sized bed overlooking the ocean.
"It's beautiful," I whispered. The plush bedding was a deep red, and the iron headboard was wrapped in intricate designs as if designed for bondage. Mirrors lined the ceiling and the low lights gave off a moody feel.
"It's so strange, being here with you, Love." Normally, I was a confident woman. But Gavriel's words shook me to my core. "Nothing has ever felt so…meaningful."
I wasn't sure what to do. A part of me wanted to launch myself at Gavriel, attack his lips with my own and show him just how much I wanted him.
"Do you remember when we met?" I asked, my voice shaking with emotion.
"I do, but I'd like to hear your version of that day's events," Gavriel said. In the far corner of the room was a simple bar. Gavriel poured himself a glass and brought it over to me. He tipped the crystal against my lips, allowing me a taste before he pulled it back and downed the rest of it.
I swallowed deeply before beginning my tale. "My mom heard that the Jamesons got their first foster placement. She took me to the store that morning. Mom bought a case of chocolate chip cookies, then arranged them perfectly on one of her platters. I remember she made me get dressed in a pale pink skirt because she wanted us to match when we stopped by." At the time, I didn't think anything strange of her behavior. Mom was always consumed with her image, and it was something I learned to accept as a quirk of her behavior.
"When we knocked on the door, Mrs. Jameson answered, but she looked angry. The moment she saw my mother, she plastered on a fake smile and accepted the cookies we brought. My mom bullied her way inside, and that was when I first saw you."
Gavriel walked over to the windows and looked outside. The soft light of the room, combined with the moonlight outside made his skin glow. His haunting silhouette against the ocean’s backdrop made my skin flush.
"She had just asked me to call her 'mom,' " Gavriel explained. My pulse pounded as he finally explained his side of the story. "I'd told her there was no way in hell I'd consider her my mother. I had just gotten out of the hospital with a gunshot wound, and she didn't care what my name was, or even who I was. I was nothing more than a charity case that she could brag about to her friends. And when I saw you, in your perfect little dress, with your perfect mother, and your perfect platter of cookies, I hated you, too."
I nodded my head. I had assumed as much. When I walked through the Jamesons’ entryway, Gavriel had given me a burning look of anger so intense that it made my legs tremble.
"I remember that," I began. "My mom and Mrs. Jameson snuck off to the kitchen. I felt intimidated by you. I knew the proper thing to do would be to introduce myself, but I couldn't help but stare. And then you said, 'What the fuck are you staring at?' " Gavriel chuckled, and I couldn't help but smile at the memory.
"I am not sure what made me respond the way that I did. Maybe it was the fact that my mom and I had argued that morning. Or maybe you've always pushed the right buttons. But I'll never forget how I looked you in the eye and said, 'I'm just trying to figure out how they put eyeballs on an asshole.’ " We both laughed at the memory. Gavriel's chuckles sounded so youthful that for a moment, I thought we were back in the Jamesons’ kitchen.
"When your mom came to get you," Gavriel began, "I remember seeing her grab your shoulder. Maybe to others, the movement was normal. But her nails dug into your skin. You winced, a little. And it was at that moment, I realized maybe we were a little more similar than I originally gave you credit for."
G
avriel set down his glass and made his way over to me. His eyes were dark and hooded, and he stood so close that I was breathing in his vanilla scent. "You're jaded, Love," he said while tracing a finger over my breast. "You're dark." He circled me, trailing his hands over my skin until he was at my back.
I let out a quick breath as he lifted my curly hair and placed a soft kiss on the back of my neck. "I thought you were too good for me," he admitted while pinching the zipper at my back and slowly easing it down. "I thought I was saving you by staying away."
I leaned back, resting my head on his shoulder as he lowered the zipper even more. His fingers teased my lower back as his knuckles grazed my sensitive skin along my spine. "Now, I know better. We're the same, you and I. The world broke us, and the only way we'll ever feel whole again is with each other."
Gavriel shoved the dress down over my shoulders and hips, and when it hit the floor, I kicked it away. He began kissing a trail down my spine, hovering over my bra clasp until my chest was free. As air hit my pebbled peaks, I groaned. "So pretty," he murmured while lowering to his knees. He drug his teeth across my thong, grasping the material with his bite and pulling it over my ass. He didn't pull them completely off, though. The material stayed at my knees, making me immobile. My knees knocked together, and I swayed in my heels as he lightly bit the globe of my ass.
Waves of warm pleasure flooded me, and I tried to keep upright. For so long I'd wanted this. So long I thought of my tortured Bullet. Now that I had Gavriel on his knees and worshipping me, I couldn't believe how much his kisses felt like home.
With one hand still clutching my thong, binding my legs together, he stood, then lifted my body to cradle me in his arms. My black heels fell off my feet as he carried me to the bed and laid me down. "Look at that gorgeous pussy." His voice was reverent as he pulled the lace around my knees off, sliding it into his pants pocket. A shiver that started at my scalp and traveled all the way down to my toes made me tremble with need. "Are you going to open up to me, Sunshine?"