Protagonized

by Shannon Myers

  “Tell me about why you became a writer. Last night you said it was more of a hobby, was there something else you wanted to do?” His deep voice was hypnotic, as was his large hand covering my stomach.

  Despite all of my bluster about forgetting last night in the hotel, I realized as he spoke that I was full of shit.

  I wasn’t getting over him.

  Not in this lifetime anyway.

  I swallowed past the sudden lump in my throat. “You mean like when I was little?”

  He continued stroking the back of my hand with his thumb and nodded. “Yeah. What did you want to be?”

  Our faces were inches apart, each breath shared between us.

  Pain blurred my thoughts, making it hard to concentrate. Max pushed my toes toward my shin, and I let out a startled gasp of pain before biting down on my lip. He said something to Aaris and she left the room.

  “Hey, eyes on me.” I reluctantly looked up at him again and he continued. “You’ve got this. Just talk to me.”

  I nodded shakily. “Um, I didn’t know I wanted to be a writer; not like what you mean anyway. I actually started with writing song lyrics. I watched a lot of Star Search and I had this idea in my head that I was going to be discovered when I least expected it, so I wrote out my songs.”

  He brought his hand up and brushed the hair off of my forehead. “Song lyrics, huh?”

  “What does huh mean?”

  Jake smirked. “Nothing. It just makes sense now.”

  I was going to ask what made sense, but Max shifted my foot and I ground my teeth together to keep from screaming at him. He looked up at me somberly. “It’s sprained.”

  “You think?” I bit out through clenched teeth.

  He nodded. “Yes. Completely sprained. You don’t have the stuff I need, so Aaris and I are going to run down to the VA and—”

  “Wait.” I stopped him. “What am I going to need?”

  He began ticking items off on his fingers. “Bandages to keep it immobile, a walking boot, and a good pair of crutches.”

  “But, how long will I need these?” I couldn’t be on crutches for my parent’s dinner next weekend. Reid would never let me hear the end of it.

  Max shrugged. “Two…maybe three weeks?”

  So much for making a grand entrance.

  Twenty

  I pulled the hem of the red dress down toward my knees, frowning at my reflection in the mirror before casting a longing look at the jeans and t-shirt wadded up on my bed.

  The jeans would’ve been better for covering up the monstrosity on my right leg, but that wouldn’t have fit my mother’s dress code.

  “You’ll just go for dinner and then make your excuses to leave early,” I told myself.

  “Hayden?” Jake tapped his knuckles against the door.

  “Come in.” I continued glaring at the girl in the mirror. A girl who felt like a stranger. My face was suffocating under the layers of makeup and it took everything in me not to gnaw at the crimson stain on my lips.

  “Hey, are you—” Jake froze in the doorway. “Fuck. What’s all this for?”

  I looked over my shoulder at him. “I have to go to my parent’s house for dinner, remember?”

  He nodded slowly. “And your parents… they live in the White House? Or is it Buckingham Palace?”

  I ran my fingers through the soft curls, hoping they didn’t frizz up on the way over. “Something like that,” I answered distractedly. “I’ll be home before ten.”

  “You can’t go by yourself, Hayden. You can’t even drive,” he noted with a wry smile.

  I hobbled over to the bed to grab my purse, ignoring the perfectly good pair of crutches leaned up against the wall. “I’ll just call Uber or something.”

  Max had insisted I use them at all times for the next two weeks, but Bootsy had become fascinated with them and made a game of darting out in front of me. After tripping over her repeatedly, I decided I was better off taking my chances with just the boot.

  “Is my gray suit formal enough for dinner?”

  “Why?”

  Jake rolled his eyes. “Because I’m writing a book on etiquette. C’mon, I’m going with you. Someone’s got to make sure you don’t break the other leg while you’re there.”

  I thought about it. It would be nice to have someone to talk to, and then I remembered why we were having dinner in the first place.

  “I—” I hedged. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. It’s usually a pretty intimate affair with just family.” Well, and Reid’s girlfriend, Emily, but she’d been considered a part of the family since day one.

  “Well, I think they can make an exception for your… who can we say I am? A boyfriend, maybe?” He said it all nonchalantly.

  Meanwhile, the floor had dropped out from beneath my feet, sending me spiraling into a mess of emotions.

  He’d said the B word.

  “But, what happens when you leave?” I hadn’t meant to say it.

  I temporarily lost my train of thought, along with all the reasons he couldn’t go to dinner, when he stripped off his shirt.

  “I don’t know,” he said from inside the closet. “I guess you could say it didn’t work out.”

  I could say that.

  I could also join the Peace Corps and change lives all over the world.

  Could and would were miles apart.

  I sighed. “Fine. I have to leave in five minutes so that I have enough time to stop at the bakery on the way.”

  Jake walked back into the bedroom as he fastened the buttons on his dress shirt. “Ah, classic. You didn’t make anything, so you’re stopping at the bakery,” he teased. “Are you going to put it on a fancy plate and pass it off as your own too?”

  If he only knew…

  I laughed and hobbled into the living room. “Not quite. No one in my family would expect me to cook. My mom asked me to pick up an order for her. I guess she ran out of time.”

  Bootsy watched us from the couch with her precious iPad resting on the cushion beneath her. Max had turned her into a damn monster. If I tried to put a nature documentary on, she meowed incessantly and batted the damn thing off the couch.

  Only Bob Ross would do for the little Khaleesi.

  I waved at her and she flicked her tail in response before dismissing us. The temperature outside was in the fifties, so I grabbed my coat on the way out.

  “Hop on?” Jake gestured toward his back as we reached the stairs.

  I pointed down at my dress. “I’m not sure this is appropriate attire for piggyback rides.”

  He nodded. “You’re right. Plan B. Come here.”

  I limped the three steps over to him and he scooped me up into his arms. “Is this better?”

  I nodded dumbly just as a door opened and Eddie stepped out, looking more impaired than usual. “Fuck, you look nice, Detective. I really like that red dress. Brings out the color of your eyes.”

  Jake frowned at him. “I’m going to assume you’re talking to my girl and not me, in which case I’ll let it slide. I’m taking her to dinner.”

  “The dumpster said you might be heading out soon. The dumpster says a lot of things though.” Eddie swallowed nervously and scurried back into his apartment like a cockroach.

  He really needed to find friends who were actual people, not inanimate objects. This was coming from someone who had developed feelings for a fictional character, but that still seemed like a step up from a waste receptacle.

  “That was… strange,” I noted dryly.

  “Yeah, he needs to lay off the drugs. Maybe get out of his apartment more.” We continued down the stairs, with Jake acting like nothing was amiss.

  First, it was the B word.

  Now, my girl.

  Detective Hopkins was dangerously close to me swooning in his arms from all the sweet talk.

  He offered me the use of a motorized cart when we stopped at the bakery. I refused, having made the split-second decision that hobbling was much less humiliating.<
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  The rest of the drive was quiet, but not like an angry or uncomfortable silence. It was different this time.

  Anticipated silence.

  Like we were looking forward to something.

  Jake let out a low whistle as we pulled into the long driveway. “This is not what I expected…”

  I ran my damp hands over the hem of my dress, smoothing it against my thighs. “Yep. This is where they live.”

  His eyebrows drew together as he looked at me. “Are you shaking?”

  “No,” I laughed. “Low blood sugar. Let’s go eat.” I was going to vomit before we even made it inside.

  There were luxury cars everywhere. Jake parked behind one, his truck sticking out like a hillbilly cousin at the country club. “I thought you said this was just a small family dinner.”

  I shrugged. Maybe they’d decided to make a big thing of it. “It usually is,” I murmured as I counted the vehicles.

  He took the bakery box from my hand and helped me down from the truck.

  “There you are,” my mother trilled from the front porch. “I was beginning to wonder if we needed to send a search party.”

  I forced a smile onto my face. “Sorry. The bakery was a little backed up.”

  She shook her head and wagged her finger, sending some of her martini sloshing over the side of the glass. “Hayden, lack of planning on your part is not the bakery’s fault. Oh!” She noticed Jake and smiled like the former beauty queen she was. “And who is this?”

  Surprisingly, the King of Smirks didn’t return it. “Detective Jake Hopkins. And you are?”

  She extended a hand. “Anna Michaels, Hayden’s mother. She’s never mentioned you before- a detective… how interesting.”

  My mother led us through the arched foyer and into the kitchen. “Just put that box down there and we’ll go find Craig.”

  “Mom?” I touched her arm and lowered my voice. “Um, could you, I mean, would it be possible for me to get reimbursed for the cake? It was a little expensive.”

  A hundred and fifty dollars was a drop in the bucket to them, but to me, it meant that Bootsy and I would both be eating tinned cat food until my next royalty payment.

  She laughed uncomfortably before her eyes darted up to Jake. It was her classic, we don’t discuss money in front of strangers look. “Hayden, I think you still owe your father for that editing business he covered for you. Let’s not make tonight unpleasant, okay?”

  I nodded. “Sure. I just thought…”

  “I’ll have your father take it off your tab,” she answered sweetly before shaking her head at Jake. “Kids and money—what can you do? Now, everyone’s outside.”

  She tottered out to the patio, but Jake held back. “Are you okay?” His hand came down to rest on my arm.

  “Oh, yeah. She’s just had a few too many martinis. It’s fine.” I stepped around him and limped out to the patio before he had a chance to see my eyes fill.

  Sadness was quickly replaced by anger when I saw Reid and his colleagues milling about the expansive backyard. A band played in the corner and there was a long table of catered food set up. It looked like a goddamn wedding was taking place.

  “What is all this?” I asked my mother.

  She hesitated for a brief second and I knew; I knew it was too much for me to have even one night.

  “Well, Reid’s company finalized their merger with PharmTech yesterday and we wanted to celebrate. Emily’s going to be out of town next weekend, so it left us with this weekend. It’ll be too cold after that.”

  I stood in open-mouthed shock as I watched Reid and my father tell some hilarious story to a group of suits around them. Everyone laughed and drank while I stood frozen on the patio.

  “Come on, Hayden. Go congratulate your brother. This is a very big accomplishment for him,” she chided.

  I navigated the first step with my air cast, something she’d yet to acknowledge and Jake stepped in, leading me down the stairs to the yard.

  “Hey.” His voice was low. “Care to tell me what the hell’s going on?”

  “Um, apparently Reid’s company merged with some other company and we’re celebrating.” I began giggling hysterically and his grip tightened on my arm.

  My father saw us and excused himself from the group. “Little Hayden… about time you showed up. Did your mother tell you the big news?”

  I nodded as he pulled me into a rough hug. “She did.”

  He ruffled my hair. “See what happens when you work hard for something? You should go talk to Reid and get some pointers.” He turned to Jake. “And you are?”

  “Detective Jake Hopkins.”

  “Craig Michaels.” They shook hands, but Jake once again wasn’t smiling. He looked like he was trying to solve a mystery.

  “Detective, huh? What trouble has this one gotten into now?” My father bellowed with laughter.

  Jake’s eyebrows were almost touching. “I’m dating your daughter, not investigating her. You’re saying you’ve never heard my name before?”

  Oh no.

  I knew where he was going with this.

  My father shook his head. “No, but you know how most women play hard to get? Well, this little one plays hard to want.” He boomed with laughter again at his clever joke.

  He was the only one.

  My face heated with embarrassment. “Good one, Dad. We’re just going to go get some food.”

  “Wait. Anna!” he yelled across the lawn. “Anna, the gift!”

  My mother waved at him and nodded before disappearing back into the house. She returned with an envelope. “Here we are. A little something for the birthday girl.”

  Jake sucked in a breath beside me, but I kept my eyes on my parents. I hadn’t wanted him to come for this very reason.

  I took the envelope and imagined a check with a lot of zeroes inside. Instead, there was a picture of a leather couch. I frowned at it.

  “A… couch?” I had a couch. I didn’t have room for another.

  My father nodded. “A couch. Something that won’t collect cat hair like the one you’ve got now. That thing is more cat hair than sofa, am I right?” He chuckled.

  I looked down at the picture again, buying myself some time before I opened my mouth and said something I was just going to regret. Bootsy would have the leather shredded within a week.

  “Now, here’s the best part,” my mother chimed in. “This couch can be yours in three more payments. See! It teaches you to manage money and solves the cat hair problem.”

  My nostrils flared and my jaw was beginning to ache from clenching my teeth. Jake’s hand dug into the place between my neck and shoulder. “You got my gift on layaway?”

  They smiled proudly and Jake began steering me toward the food table. “Excuse us for a second.”

  “Absolutely,” my father replied. “See if you can’t get her to eat a little something. She’s far too short these days.”

  His laughter echoed in my ears as we moved toward the white linen-covered tables.

  “It’s your birthday?”

  I nodded. “You’re using your Batman voice again, you know?”

  He rolled his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me? We could’ve—”

  “We could’ve what?” I hissed back at him. “It’s just another day. We’ll eat and then have cake. That’s all I need.”

  He pursed his lips and studied my face. “This is what you want?”

  I added a spoonful of mozzarella salad to my plate. “Absolutely. This is fine.”

  We moved through the line in silence before finding a round table near the house.

  “Your parents don’t know who I am,” he stated flatly before snagging a meatball from his plate.

  “You expected that they’d know about my make-believe boyfriend?” I snorted. “I’m crazy, but not that crazy.”

  “That’s not what I mean, and you know it. Your parents should’ve picked up on that name immediately. I’m only the main character in three of your books.�
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  I pushed a piece of mini quiche across the plate with my fork. “Well, they’re not really into reading the genre I write. They prefer something a little more high-brow.”

  Jake’s chair creaked as he leaned forward. “High-brow? It’s a book your kid wrote! My kid could write a book on the mating practices of sea turtles and I’d read the shit out of it—”

  “Got a thing for sea turtles, do you?” I asked with a grin.

  “Jesus, no. You’re missing the point. If your son or daughter creates something, you acknowledge that.” He gestured at the crowd of people. “I mean, what the fuck did your brother do to warrant hijacking your birthday party? Cure cancer?”

  “Well,” I hedged. “Not quite, but that’s the endgame from what I understand.”

  Reid’s girlfriend, Emily, waved at me from the porch and I stood up. “Hey, just eat the free food and enjoy the music. I’m going to go say hello to my brother’s girlfriend.”

  In a rare show of emotion, Jake reached for my arm and pulled me toward him. “You deserve better than this and you know it.” He pressed a light kiss against the back of my hand, and I was on my way to the ground in a dramatic faint before I realized he was doing it for show.

  We had to look like a real couple for my parents.

  I patted his back awkwardly. “Okay, Detective. You’re gonna give yourself diabetes if you keep it up with the sweet bullshit.”

  His mouth turned down and he sighed. “You would say that. Go, try to have some fun.”

  I pointed down at my boot. “But, not too much.”

  Emily met me halfway and took my arm in hers, leading me into the kitchen. “What happened to you?”

  I explained the entire ordeal as we sat across from each other at the marble island, including the cupcake incident at the hotel. I managed to keep what happened after to myself.

  That was the thing about Emily. She made me feel entirely too comfortable, which led to oversharing. I just changed a few details and made Jake the detective working my stalking case.

  She popped the cork on a bottle of white wine and frowned. “So, someone tried to poison you and got him instead? Have you told your parents about this?”

  I laughed. “I haven’t told anyone but Aaris about this. It’s too ‘out there,’ you know? Well, I take that back. Max knows too, but Jake told him.”