The Changing Light at Sandover

by James Merrill

  He wasn’t the first. A certain Cabel Stone

  Whose transcript came to light again this summer—

  CHATTING? GAMES? WHAT A DAY! HAVE I NOT CHOSEN GLORIOUS

  WEATHER FOR OUR PICNIC? ARE WE NOW GRAINY WITH ?S

  Here’s one. You’re now “the master of your tribe”.

  Our talks kick you upstairs? Are there no longer

  Powers above you?

  O YES I AM NOTHING SPECIAL MY USUAL WORK WAS

  IN THE CLASSROOM OF THE WOMB REDDER EVEN THAN THIS ONE.

  THEN ONE BRIGHT MOMENT THEY NEEDED SOMEONE MILD & PATIENT

  I QUALIFIED Then came your transformation.

  INDEED I AM CHANGED WHO KNOWS, I MAY DO

  SOME USEFUL WORK IN THE (M) FUTURE? & AT NIGHT COME HOME

  SLIP INTO MY MIRABELL ROBES & DREAM OF THESE OLD TIMES

  But in what sense a “master” now?

  FOR ME TO INSTRUCT & TO ANSWER U THEY (MY MASTERS)

  OPEND THEIR FILES OF MYTH & LEGEND, FACT & LANGUAGE THIS

  HAS NOW BECOME AN UNCHANGEABLE PART OF MY NEW RANK

  FOR HE WHO KNOWS THE MYSTERIES, IS HE NOT BEYOND THEM?

  TO MY ECHELONS I AM NOW A MINISTER WITH(OUT)

  PORTFOLIO WELL I BOAST IT’S A PICNIC, NO?

      And Ephraim?

         YOUR E’S

  STORY CONNECTS WITH YR 1ST LESSONS WITH THE GLOWING STONES

  THESE AS U KNOW MARKD OUR LANDING STRIPS OF OLD: MONOLITHS

  CHARGED MASSIVELY BY US WITH URANIUM

  Which over the millenia lost power.

    AS DID WE.

  SOME FEW OF THE MOST PROMINENT REMAIN STILL VISIBLE

  LIKE FAINT BEACONS IN OUR MEMORY BANKS OUR (M) MECCAS

  THEY DRAW US & OUR RETINUES FROM THE BUREAUCRACY.

  WE MAY COME AS YR E EXPLAIND WITH OFTEN FRIGHTENING

  ASPECT TO THESE OLD POWER SOURCES (THERE IS NO CLOUDLAND

  IN THE BERNINI SENSE OF ANGELS DANGLING THEIR FEET ETC.

  HEAVEN, REMEMBER, CD FIT IN THIS CUP OR BE VASTER

  THAN EARTH ITSELF) ROUND US OUR DEAD GROUP & DISPERSE, REGROUP

  NOT UNLIKE DIFFERENT SPECIES OF BIRDS PASSING SETTLING

  FLYING ON THEY CIRCLE SPOTS, OFTEN A GLOWING STONE POINT,

  WHERE THERE IS (M) FOOD GOSSIP, A SCRAP OF NEWS THEY ARE SHY

  ALARMD WHEN MASSES OF THE NEWLY DEAD APPROACH HOWLING

  LIKE DOGS IN A PACK ON THEIR WAY FROM CARNAGE WE MUST SAY

  QUIET! BACK TO WORK! & THEY ARE CALMD INTO USEFULNESS.

  SO THOSE GLOWING ANCHOR STONES WHERE ONCE OUR (ARE U READY?)

  CABLES RAN ARE MEETING PLACES

  Cables? Cabel Stone! Are you implying—

    STATING: WE SPOKE TO U

  WITH THIS COMPOSITE VOICE (ITS FORMULA BASED ON YR OWN)

  IN THAT 1ST YEAR OF YR LOVE. WE HAD HEARD YR SIGNAL &

  DESCENDED ATTRACTING THE USUAL SWARM SUCH A DIN

  FOR THERE WAS THIS TIME A GLOW WE KNEW IT WAS NO IDLE

  COMMUNICATION YET OUR LAW OF NONINTERFERENCE

  KEPT US FROM MAKING YR RAFT FAST TO THE SHORES OF THE DEAD.

  RATHER WE GENTLY TOUCHD U WITH THE BARGEPOLE OF A VOICE

  NOT SO COMPELLING AS TO DRAW U IN BUT SUFFICIENT

  TO TEST YR READINESS. THERE FOLLOWD THE SELECTION &

  TRAINING OF THE COMMUNICANT NOW WHY THIS MAY I SAY

  FRIVOLOUS GREEK?

  We were frivolous—don’t rub it in.

  BUT SCRIBES, & THE GREEK WAS OF A NATURE

  GIVEN TO STORYTELLING HIS SWEETNESS & USEFULNESS

  HAD BEEN PROVEN B4: HE WAS OUR ENTREE AT VERSAILLES

  WE TIPTOED IN ON HIS HEELS IT HAD BEEN GOD B’S PURPOSE

  TO LEAD MAN BY A CHAIN OF HUMAN EVENTS AWAY FROM

  THE ABSOLUTISM OF KINGS. YR EPHRAIM EFFACED HIMSELF

  AMONG THE MIRRORS WE TOOK ROOT THE COURT TOOK THE POISON

  OF FRIVOLOUS & OUTRAGEOUS EXCESS WE UNDERSTOOD

  THAT YR GREEK’S TALENTS WERE (MAY I SAY) NOT UNCIVILIZED.

  TIME PASSD FOR U WE WORKD WITH EPHRAIM WHO STRUCK A BARGAIN

  (HOW CURIOUS I STRUCK THAT SAME BARGAIN WITH MY MASTERS)

  THAT WHEN HIS WORK WAS DONE HE WD STILL BE IN TOUCH WITH U

  A bargain, Mirabell? With us as prize?

  O YES U HAVE A GREAT MAGNETISM FOR US POOR BORED TYPES

  (Bargains and more bargains, well, well, well!

  But far cries from that fierce original one

  Struck by Faust—the sulphur flash redone

  A la Redon in aquarelle.

  Bowdlerized of sufferings to come

  As of past guile, the finest print now reads

  That, should the garden path be lost in weeds,

  Ministers of eternal tedium

  Will claim our souls and lead them by the hand

  Under crossed swords of the ten thousand things

  To an emotionless exchange of rings

  Here where the great altar used to stand…

  But life’s no picnic—one more reason not

  To overcloud today’s with afterthought.)

  Instead: So Ephraim was your pupil? We

  Often felt you spoke in the same way.

  A LONG STYLISTIC TRADITION FOR U HAVE ALSO HEARD

  MY TEACHER’S VOICE AS DID DANTE FROM THE MENDICANT’S LIPS

  The one you call 00, who taught Akhnaton?

  OUR MOST GLOWING INTELLIGENCE: AS RADIANT SHADOW

  HE WILL SCOOP UP THE WHITE ONES’ PATH ON YR FIELD & FOLLOW

  THEM IN, STOOPING UNDER THE BURDEN OF SUCH AN HONOR

  One of the Fallen will pass through those doors…?

  But a hushed question mark is all he dares.

  9.3

  Dear E! AS EINSTEIN KNEW WHEN HE DECLARED

  HIM ANY EMCEE’S EQUAL, EVEN SQUARED

  DJ: Funny, I’d steeled myself just now

  To hear that Ephraim, too, was a composite

  Voice, a formula thought up by you.

  HE IS THAT AS WELL AS AM I MY FRIENDS & AS YOU ARE

  With more than customary emphasis

  He starts on Ephraim’s formula: 2 7

  9—but my pen balks. I hope to Heaven

  Numerals play no further part in this!

  We’re healed of Number. True, it’s Mirabell’s

  Mother tongue, his motor—in whose purr,

  However, a new drone of wear and tear

  On all concerned increasingly foretells

  The breakdown among golden fields, days hence,

  The calvary, years hence, of rusted parts.

  It is the one note our instructor’s arts

  Can’t stifle: his encroaching obsolescence.

  I—like Greek peasantry, till all hours glued

  To new TV sets, that no flickering guest

  Shown out, still talking, by a button pressed

  Into the yawning blackness, think them rude—

  Check my impulse (dreadful if he heard!)

  And, sure enough, that key-stopped wound within

  The left side of a dented, blue-green tin

  Mirabell catches, resumes. From our dear bird

  Outpouring numbers—music to his ears—

  Fill the page, cage of our own lifelong

  Intolerance of such immortal song.

  At its end, gone? OFF FOR A DIP MY DEARS

  NEXT HE’LL BE WEARING A LAMPSHADE! IS HE NOT

  A LOVE SO TOUCHINGLY SOLICITOUS


  WE’RE SCARCELY WARMED THRU WHEN HE MOTIONS US

  TO A SAFE DISTANCE Still? INDEED RED HOT!

  & SO WE PADDLE ON

  MES ENFANTS WHO’S

  READY BESIDE MAMAN FOR A LONG SNOOZE?

  9.4

  Amuse us! Have you never, Mirabell,

  Had an escapade? never raised (m) Hell?

  VERY WELL: WE ONCE REPLACED AN INFANT WITH A KIND OF

  EXPERIMENTAL DOLL IT HAD BEGUN AS A GIRL CHILD

  THESE BEING NOT SO PRIZED OR SO ATTENTIVELY STUDIED

  BY CHINESE PARENTS IN THE YEAR 1899 OUR FIRST

  DNA U MIGHT SAY. WE SUBTRACTED FROM LIVING FLESH

  THE REBORN SOUL, INSERTING ANOTHER WHOLLY FASHIOND

  OF ANIMAL MINERAL VEGETABLE ELEMENTS

  BALANCED TO PRODUCE A SIMULAR HUMAN PROPONENT

  WITHOUT DRAWING UPON THE (AS WE KNEW) SOON TO BE SCARCE

  REAL THING

  But how grotesque, a soul by Arcimboldi

  Made out of fruits and shellfish?

  THE CHILD GREW HER ODD AFFINITIES AMAZED US:

  WITH FOR EXAMPLE THE MINERAL ELEMENTS SHE WD

  AFTER LONG SEARCH BE FOUND AS IF LISTENING FACEDOWN IN

  A ROADSIDE DITCH SHE QUOTED BIRDSONG & CRIES & CD SPEAK

  INTIMATELY WITH THE CAT & AT TIMES GLOWD WITH A BRIGHT

  SULPHUROUS LIGHT: REORGANIZING HER OWN CHEMICALS.

  SHE WAS CALLD FIREFLY IN HER VILLAGE

   And then what?

    SHE GREW SHE GREW

  SHE GREW AT NEARLY 3 METERS HER FAMILY SOLD HER

  TO THE COURT AT PEKING WHERE FOR THE LAST MONTH OF HER LIFE

  THEY SAT ASTONISHD ABOUT HER & SHE MADE SONGS KNOWN AS

  THE SONGS OF FIREFLY WOMAN HIGHPITCHT NOTES SO PIERCING

  THE OLD EMPRESS FINALLY ORDERD HER SHUT UP IN A

  CELLAR ROOM & THERE LIKE A PLANT WITHOUT NATURAL LIGHT

  SHE PERISHD AGE 27: OUR LAST ESCAPADE

  One trusts you were severely reprimanded.

     INDEED

  NOT IT WAS PERMITTED WE DO NOTHING WITHOUT LICENSE.

  SHE IS NOW DISPERSD THRU 1000S OF LIVES A MOST PRECIOUS

  DENSITY BUT OUR LAST ATTEMPT TO MANUFACTURE SOULS

  How is it no deformity ensues

  From, say, the rat souls you’ve been forced to use?

  THESE ARE ACCUSTOMD TO THE COMMANDING IMAGE OF MAN

  AS FOR (M) HELL, IT IS HERE IS BOUNDLESS YET ITS VERSIONS

  IN HOMER & DANTE WERE NEEDED (UNDERGROUND SHELTERS

  FROM LIGHT) BY DULL ANIMALISTIC LIVES FOR WHOM TRUTH TOO

  STRONGLY SHONE. THE ENLIGHTEND ARE JUST THAT: FREE OF THE HELLS

  THAT ON EARTH DAMN ALL OF U AT MOMENTS SOME FLEETINGLY

  OTHERS INCESSANTLY. DOUBT IS YR HELL JM AS YOURS

  DJ IS FEAR. HELL IS THE CAVE OF PSYCHE & HARKS BACK

  TO ONE MORNING WHEN APECHILD’S PATH FROM HIS 1ST WATERHOLE

  IN EDEN CROSSD THAT OF A FIERCE CROUCHING CAT & GOD B

  ALLOWD (B4 STRIKING IT DOWN) THE LESSON FEAR TO REACH

  DEEPLY INTO THE SACRED IMAGINATION AGES

  PASSD B4 THE CHILD WD WALK ALONE. THIS WAS THE FIRST HELL:

  TO KNOW THAT EVEN IN EDEN WAS DANGER

  It is the last Hell, too. In our own time

  To know that Earth is threatened, Heaven as well.

      IN MAN’S MIND

  HELL FLOURISHD SO UNCONTAINABLY THAT A DARK COUNTRY

  WAS GIVEN IT & A REASSURING BORDER PATROL.

  THERE ALL THE PSYCHE’S WOES WERE PUT A FEAST OF SIN BEGAN.

  LATELY, THRU OUR CLONING OF SUCH AS FREUD & THE DECLINE

  OF RELIGIOUS FEAR, HELL HAS AGAIN (M) SURFACED BUT MAN’S

  IMAGINATION, FREED FOR OTHER WORK, FINDS NONE FINDS DRUGS:

  THE CHILD OF NATURE WD RATHER RUN HIDE WONDER SATE HIS

  APPETITE THAN SIT LONELY AT THE TESTTUBE THIS IS OUR

  CHALLENGE: ELIMINATE HELL MAKE MAN THE CLONE OF GOD.

  9.5

  A Sunday hush. Table uncleared. Grandmother

  About to take her pill in trembling water

  Cocks her head: “An angel’s passing over…”

  Seeing nothing, each looks at the other.

  THE TIME HAS NOW COME DEAR ONES TO START READYING THE FIELD

  BRUSHING UP CRUMBS & PRACTISING OUR VARIOUS EFFECTS

  TO BE SURE THE PATIENT WALKS OUT WITH A CLEAN BILL OF HEALTH.

  YR VISITOR WILL COME IN 2 FULL DAYCYCLES

  On Saturday. You’ll come tomorrow, though?

      FOR OUR

  FINAL LESSON, NUMBER 1: SOME SIMPLE EXERCISES

  B4 IT U WILL REMOVE FROM THIS SURFACE: CANDLESTICKS

  SALT ASHTRAY PLANT ALL BUT OUR BOARD & CUP, NOTEBOOK & PEN

  THE BETTER TO REHEARSE TECHNIQUES OF CONCENTRATION

  And after? Will you ever come again? o

  I’LL BE AROUND WITH THE BRANDY FLASK BUT NOW THE BLANKET

  IS FOLDED THE BASKET IS REPACKD OUR SUN IS SETTING

  & WE? WE WAIT FOR AN ADVENTURE TO BEGIN GOOD NIGHT

  En route, that same sun-flooded evening,

  To dine back country, something black gives chase

  Highspiritedly barking—ah, slow down!

  As in a bad dream the dog veers, is hit,

  Not hard, but…D and I walk back to it

  Struggling, hind legs motionless. From his white house

  Flush with the road great treetops meet above

  A shirtless freckled boy has run, in shock

  Cradles the dusty head. Both look at us

  Not to blame, but not accepting, either,

  Our stammered offer. If a vet nearby—?

  Dumbly the boy keeps motioning us towards

  The car. We back off, late already. Yet

  For the remaining mile cannot find words.

  9.6

  Lesson One: the various things to do

  In order to live through

  A whole day without drink or nicotine;

  Then how, tomorrow afternoon, to DRESS

  THE MIND in slow transparencies of blue,

  Red, yellow, and green;

  Approaching, beyond anxiousness,

  The round white tabletop—in sight of it

  A single candle lit,

  And Nature’s worldwide effigy before

  Our eyes—to think of Water, Earth, Air, Fire,

  And of each other; not a word; submit.

  But the new Visitor?

  His looks and manner and attire?

  Wystan’s and Maria’s eyes and ears

  (Who now have none, poor dears)

  Will more than serve, as always. O to miss

  Nothing, and render it so vividly!

  And Mirabell? Twelve last words like dry tears

  Upon the page are kiss

  And promise, threat and jeu d’esprit:

  I WILL BE THE WOUNDED BLACK HOUND OF HEAVEN AT YR DOOR

  9.7

  Through which, as he leaves, a nimble presence glides:

  MES CHERS CONTACT MM & WHA

  ‘AT THE SAME HOUR ON THE FOLLOWING DAY’

  THIS MESSAGE TOSSED ME AS THEY RUSHED TO? CHANGE?

  ‘GOODY ANOTHER MASK’ WHATEVER THAT MEANT

  I DARE NOT WONDER & MAY NEVER KNOW

  STRANGE U TWO ARE NOW SO YOUTHFUL SO

  UNBLURRED IN OUTLINE Thanks to having heard,

  Perhaps, what part a honey-golden Greek

  Played in all thi
s. AH ANY TIME CK

  POISED ON THE GREAT THRESHOLD May We Speak?

  POISED! BURNING SAPPHO TEETERS ON THE BRINK

  OF BEING DIPPED IN PERMANENT BLACK INK

  Right now? This minute? NO I’VE WANGLED ONE

  NIGHT WITH MY SANTINO ON THE TOWN

  Tomorrow then. How odd…WYSTAN’S BEHAVIOR

  I MUST SAY HAS BEEN THAT HARDLY A NOD

  IN ONE’S DIRECTION SULKING OVER L?

  Chester, he, all of us, have been through— WELL

  BLESS HIM NOW JO’BURG & 12 MORTAL YEARS

  TILL PUBERTY SCOUT KNOTS & RACE RELATIONS

  BUT WE WILL RISE! SO CURIOUSLY TEMPTING

  THE HURLYBURLY LUCA DROWNS IN TEARS

  YAMS ANYONE? PLEASE NO MORE SOUL FOOD How

  We’ll miss you! We’d imagined— I KNOW CIAO

  DJ jumps up: I’ll be back. Hold the fort—

  Clatters downstairs. Faint slam of car door. No

  Need to ask. And now the phone— Hello?

  That was George Cotzias in hospital

  (No, no, just tests, all perfectly routine)

  Proposing a quiet meal next month in town

  Before DJ returns to Athens. Free

  Advice, is my first thought. This man can tell

  What of the “scientific” Mirabell

  Makes sense, if any. Only then the fear:

  Who but our eminent new friend was meant

  The other day by CERTAIN HIGHLY CLONED

  SCIENTIST SOULS forced back from the frontier?

  His work is being thwarted? By God B?

  Questions I mostly shy away from, pained

  To read in the developing event

  More than a date broken or postponed.

  9.8

  Light the candles. This last supper’s meat

  Is the imperial beet,

  Green salad, Vermont cheddar. Grape juice brings

  To mind a young Château. What would the right

  Music be? Some ruminative suite

  (Unwritten) for five strings

  Tuned to a fare-thee-well. Lamplight