Lost: The Complete Series

by Lila Kane

  His grip softened, and his thumb brushed my bottom lip just slightly. Or had I imagined that? Then his hand fell away and he stepped back.

  “This is why there are rules,” Joseph repeated. “And I expect you to follow them.”

  CHAPTER THREE

  After my conversation with Joseph, I called Tom. He’d only been able to talk for a few minutes between classes, and I’d clammed up. How did Joseph know about Don? What else had he and Tom talked about?

  I’d almost brought up the rules more than once but couldn’t bring myself to say anything. How could I complain about someone who was trying to protect me?

  But that still didn’t take away the sting of how Joseph had treated me. He really did seem as cold and callous as everyone made him out to be, and even if he was trying to help me, I didn’t want anything to do with him.

  I paced in my room again, sorting through the events of the day. Trying to figure out how long I was going to have to stay in a place I clearly wasn’t wanted.

  I couldn’t face Joseph again. What was I supposed to say to him? I wanted to yell at him, which just made me seem ungrateful. And I wanted to leave, but then I’d be putting myself right back in Don’s grasp.

  I hated feeling like all my options had been taken away.

  And now I didn’t even have a job. What the fuck? That part still made me fume. I should have told Tom that. How Joseph had taken away my job without even consulting me.

  But I had a sinking feeling Tom was going to back up his friend. After all, he’d been there after the last time Don had put me in the hospital. And he’d only agreed to help me if I promised to put Don behind me for good. It was something I’d been trying to do for months, but it had finally happened three months ago.

  Then the phone calls had started. Then Don had begun following me around. And the threats…

  I released a shaky breath and walked to the window, watching the sun sink lower in the sky. Dinnertime. No way I was going down there.

  A knock sounded at the door and I jumped. “Yes?”

  “It’s Davies, Miss. Dinner is being served downstairs in the dining room.”

  I walked to the door and pulled it open, giving him a smile. “Thank you, but I won’t be coming down tonight.”

  He hesitated, then nodded his head. “Shall I bring a plate to your room?”

  “No, thanks. I’m not hungry.”

  He hesitated again and then backed away. “Let me know if you need anything.”

  “Thank you, Davies.”

  I shut the door and locked it this time. I needed privacy. Time to think. I needed a plan—a purpose. Something more than staying locked up here indefinitely.

  When I was about to stand to go to the bathroom for a bath, another knock sounded at the door.

  “Really, Davies,” I said loud enough he could hear me. “I’m fine. I don’t need anything.”

  “It’s not Davies.”

  My stomach jumped at the sound of Joseph’s voice. I stood by the bed but stayed away from the door.

  “Come down for dinner,” he said.

  It took me a moment to find my voice, and even then, it wobbled when I spoke. “No, thank you.”

  “Damn it, Allison,” he growled. “Just come down and we can talk.”

  “I don’t think there’s anything to talk about.”

  His fist hit the other side of the door. “Don’t be stubborn. Open up.”

  “No.”

  “Allison,” he snapped. “This is fucking ridiculous. Starving yourself isn’t going to get you anywhere.”

  I walked to the door and said clearly, “I’m not hungry.”

  He cursed again and then fell silent for a moment. “Fine.”

  I waited for another thump on the door, or for him to demand I open up again, but nothing came. After a moment, I heard the sound of his footsteps walking away from the room.

  Slumping against the door, I let out a soft sob. Fuck. What was I supposed to do? I couldn’t dodge him forever or stay up here forever. I didn’t want to, and that was rude. He was giving me a place to stay.

  A bath. I’d take a bath and relax and then figure this out later when I had a better perspective.

  After relaxing in the jacuzzi tub and then pulling on leggings and a tank top, I read a book in a bed. Long enough the sky darkened fully outside. Long enough my stomach started to rumble.

  I tried to go to sleep, but when my stomach kept growling, I finally gave in and opened the door to my room. Outside, it was dim and quiet.

  Good. Maybe everyone had left or gone to bed. I could sneak down, grab some leftovers from dinner if there were any, and haul ass back up to my room without anyone knowing better.

  I padded barefoot down the hallway and then down the massive staircase. Part of me felt like I was in a movie or a fairytale, sneaking down from the tower in the middle of the night.

  Quiet.

  The thought almost made me smile.

  In the kitchen, a small light illuminated the corner of the counter. I maneuvered my way to the refrigerator, then paused.

  What was that? I listened for the noise again but didn’t hear anything. Something outside, maybe.

  Beyond the windows and the dark lawn, I could see the sparkle of city lights. Almost like a dream, and so far away.

  I swallowed hard. Would I ever feel comfortable out there again?

  Even with a restraining order, Don probably wouldn’t be deterred. But it was a step—a step I knew I’d needed to take.

  I opened the refrigerator and peered inside. On a shelf level with my eyes, there was a container with a piece of paper taped on the side. It said, Miss Tolson.

  My lips curved. Davies. He’d packed me up leftovers from dinner. I pulled it out, turned around, and then gasped.

  “Late night snack?” Joseph asked.

  With my heart lodged in my throat, flashbacks of Don eclipsing my vision, I couldn’t speak.

  “Allison,” Joseph said softly. His fingers gripped my arms, warm and steady. “Are you okay?”

  “You scared me,” I choked out.

  “You were wandering around in the middle of the night. I heard a noise and came to check it out.”

  I swallowed down my fear and ducked my chin. “I’m sorry. That was rude. This is your house and—” I turned to put the food back in the refrigerator.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Putting the food back.”

  “Fuck.” He snatched the container from my hand and set it on the counter. “You’re allowed to eat. Just because you were stubborn and wouldn’t come down for dinner doesn’t mean I’m going to deny you food the rest of the time you’re here. What kind of monster do you think I am?”

  I backed against the counter. A monster? No. But a cold-hearted man who lacked compassion? Yes.

  “I wasn’t being stubborn,” I said through gritted teeth.

  He folded his arms. His dark eyes looked fathomless in the dim lighting, but I could see the outline of muscle through his T-shirt. His sweats hung low on his hips, making my stomach clench. Making heat bloom between my legs, even as I defended myself against his words.

  Joseph had always managed to make my pulse race and my body long for his. But he had no idea. Maybe that’s why it hurt so badly that he was treating me the way he was.

  “I’m not a kid anymore, you know,” I said, lifting my chin. “You used to brush me off when I’d bother you and Tom. You acted like I didn’t exist. But that was years ago. I’m an adult now, and I don’t appreciate being brushed off. I appreciate you letting me stay here, but—”

  “You think that’s what this is?” he asked, advancing on me. My fingers curled around the ledge of the counter behind me. “A brush-off?”

  My voice came out as a squeak. “I don’t know what this is. But I don’t like it.”

  “You think I didn’t see you then?” Joseph’s voice came out rough. He stopped only inches from me. So close I could feel the heat of his body on mine. “
In those fucking short skirts you wore, legs as long as day. Body curvier than anyone’s has the right to be.”

  My heart slammed against my ribs, desire washing over me as amazement zoomed through my brain. He saw me back then?

  “And now…” Joseph leaned in, his hands on either side of me at the counter. “In that tank top that barely covers anything. I can’t help but see you. All of you.”

  I lifted my chin automatically, inviting him in. I wanted his lips on mine, wanted them to travel down my neck to the hollow of my throat. It had been so long since I’d wanted someone else’s hands on me. Don had forced himself and I’d hated him for that.

  But this…this was a longing I’d never felt with anyone but Joseph.

  He exhaled, and his breath warmed my lips. I squeezed my thighs together against the onslaught of sudden need that overwhelmed me.

  “Joseph,” I all but sobbed. Why wasn’t he saying anything? Doing anything? I could verbally fight against him all day—but I couldn’t stand up to this.

  Something cleared in his gaze, like a lightbulb going off. Sudden clarity.

  He straightened abruptly, backing away from me with almost hasty motions. His breath still came quick, and when I dropped my eyes, I saw his sweats were tented. My gaze widened, locking on his. Oh, God…what if he felt the same way I did? I’d clearly turned him on.

  Joseph plucked the container of food off the counter and shoved it into my hands. Then he turned away from me, his voice coming out gruff. “Next time if you’re hungry, come to dinner.”

  And then he vanished from the kitchen, leaving me confused and hurt. What the hell had just happened?

  CHAPTER FOUR

  The instant Tom got out of his car, I hugged him hard. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

  It had been two days of near solitude. I played cards with Davies until he had to do his duties, and then wandered around the house. I even practiced my free throws on the basketball court. But I needed more than this. I needed to be out in the fresh air.

  And more, I needed company.

  Joseph wasn’t home often, and when he was, he tried to avoid me. We’d pass each other in the hallway, lock gazes, and then he’d look away, muttering a gruff “hello.” And if we ran into each other in the kitchen or somewhere else, he’d excuse himself.

  “Allison?” Tom asked.

  I only hugged him tighter. “I think this was a bad idea.”

  He leaned back, gripping my arms to hold me at arms-length. “What do you mean? Did something happen?”

  Before I could answer, Tom’s gaze left mine, and then he released me with a grin. “Joseph!”

  I stepped back as they embraced, acting like they hadn’t seen each other in years. The sun beat down hard on us, and even though I was already ready to break a sweat, I didn’t care. It felt so good to be outside.

  Since I’d broken things off with Don, I’d spent a lot of time with Tom. We’d gone hiking and tried new restaurants. We’d taken a ferry boat and had a carefree day.

  But since I’d been here, I hadn’t even been able to sit by the pool.

  “Allison?”

  I snapped my attention back to Tom. “Sorry, what?”

  He pulled off his sunglasses and narrowed his eyes on my face. “What’s wrong?”

  “I…” I glanced at Joseph. And, like usual, he looked away. Screw him. I thought we’d had a moment in the kitchen that night. But he clearly didn’t want to remember anything about it. Or me. I smiled at Tom. “It’s such a nice day. I think we should get in the pool.”

  If Joseph wasn’t going to pay attention to me, I’d use Tom being here to get what I wanted. At least until I had the chance to pull him aside. Then I had to figure out another solution because I was not staying with Joseph another day.

  I turned to Joseph with the same sweet smile. “Unless that’s against the rules.”

  His jaw clenched. His eyes were covered by sunglasses but if I could see them right now, I knew they’d be dark as onyx. Smoldering with something I might have thought was lust at some point. But now, I was halfway convinced it was anger. That he hated me.

  “Rules?” Tom laughed, slinging his arm over my shoulder. “Rules already? Getting tough living together?”

  “You have no idea,” I murmured beneath my breath.

  Joseph went along with the plan. We all changed into our swimwear. Davies brought drinks and made sure we had extra towels and an umbrella overhead.

  I donned my red bikini, the only one I had. I’d tossed it in my bag last-minute when Tom reminded me Joseph had not one, but two swimming pools. I’d yet to use the indoor one. But today, I needed to be outside and feel the sunshine. Especially because I could already see the storm clouds piling up over the city again.

  Tonight, we were expecting rain.

  When I stepped back outside, I froze by the door. Joseph stood by the pool, his sunglasses still covering his dark eyes. He wore swim trunks and nothing else. I couldn’t help the trickle of heat between my legs. I couldn’t stop my body from reacting to his. Toned abs, muscular arms. God, even his legs were perfect. And then my gaze dropped to that vee on his abs, the chiseled line that angled downward and vanished into his low-slung swim trunks.

  I definitely needed to get out of here. It was one thing lusting over a man who returned those feelings. And another lusting over a man who couldn’t seem to stand me.

  Besides that, I couldn’t deal with his rules anymore.

  With more bravado than I felt, I walked straight to the pool and dipped my toe in. When I glanced up and caught Joseph’s gaze, my confidence faltered just slightly.

  He’d folded his arms, but he was frozen just like I had been. His lips were parted as though his breath had just caught.

  “Better enjoy it while you can,” Tom said, coming up beside me. He pointed to the clouds. “Rain.”

  “I know. Tom,” I started, ready to tell him I needed to talk to him.

  But he was already distracted, taking a running leap into the pool for a cannonball. He splashed both me and Joseph and then came up laughing.

  Dammit. I really needed to talk to him.

  “He’s right,” Joseph said from across the pool. He removed his glasses and his eyes locked on mine for a long moment. “Better enjoy it while you can.”

  He tossed aside his glasses, and to my amazement, he was running toward the pool as well. He jumped in just like Tom had and splashed me again. My mouth dropped open.

  What the hell? He could act like a normal human being around my brother, but not around me?

  What an ass!

  I jumped in after him, a carefree laugh lodging in my throat before I hit the surface. Water rushed in around me. I let myself sink to the bottom, my ass resting on the smooth cement of the pool. Tom’s and Joseph’s legs treaded water nearby, their hands floating on the surface.

  Above the water, I could see the blur of trees and blue sky and…

  Was that a person?

  My breath yanked in automatically and water sucked into my lungs. My body was racked with coughs as I shot to the surface. My lungs seized as I broke free of the water, liquid spilling from my mouth.

  “Allison.” Tom gripped my arm, supporting me as I struggled to get my feet on the ground.

  I looked wildly to the side of the pool. Where was he? Who had I seen?

  “I thought—” I pointed to the side of the pool. “I thought I saw someone—”

  Joseph was out in the blink of an eye. While I continued to cough, Tom patting my back and trying to help me to the stairs, Joseph walked the perimeter of the pool, vanished inside the cabana briefly, and then joined us on the patio.

  “Davies,” he said. “You probably saw Davies.”

  I cleared my throat, suddenly mortified. “You’re right. I—” I turned to Tom, my cheeks heating even though the rest of my body had goosebumps. “I’m sorry. That’s—”

  “Don’t apologize,” Tom soothed. “You hear me? You’re supposed to say
something if you’re worried or feel uneasy. That’s why you’re here. Because too many things were happening before and we never knew what Don was going to do next.”

  Joseph passed me a towel, but he still wouldn’t meet my eyes. Great. If he hadn’t liked me before, it was going to be even worse now. I was a paranoid girl who thought she saw people who weren’t there. Or people who belonged there.

  He was right, it was probably Davies. Or my overactive imagination. After all, I’d started seeing Don around every corner before. He haunted me even when he wasn’t there.

  “I’ll grab you a robe,” Tom said, walking to the cabana.

  I stood, shivering in the sunlight, waiting for him.

  “This is why Tom called me, you know,” Joseph said, his voice low and rough next to me.

  I blinked, and then looked over, surprised he was even trying to talk to me. He hadn’t made much of an effort so far. “I’m sorry?”

  “Tom called me because of things like this.” When I continued to look confused, he dropped his chin. “Because you were seeing your ex everywhere, and he said he was sick of watching you look over your shoulder everywhere you went. Sick of seeing you missing out on life like that. And sick of that bastard having control over you.”

  That’s what Tom said? God, I hadn’t even realized how hard it was for him. I knew I was imposing on him and making him take risks, but on top of that, he had to see my life being affected. Which was affecting his life.

  He’d found a safe place for me to help make things better. For myself and himself.

  And I’d been about ready to tell him I couldn’t stay with Joseph anymore.

  Tom returned with the robe and passed it over. I shrugged into it and followed the men inside.

  “Lunch,” Davies said when we entered the kitchen.

  He’d set a spread out on the table. Fruit, vegetables, sandwiches. Enough food to feed an army. We dug in, and for a few hours things felt almost normal. Even Joseph seemed to be enjoying himself.

  Tom brought up stories about when they were in college together, and the time I’d walked in on them changing after a football game.