Hard to Hate: An Enemies to Lovers Romance (Hard to Love Book 1)

by L. M. Reid

  Her bag ripped, its contents spilling everywhere. Then she sank to the ground and began to cry. So, I rushed over to her, comforted her and now, here we are, making our way back to my place after spending the day doing all the things she would have done with Sierra.

  We started with breakfast at Donny’s Diner, the place I used to go with my mom for breakfast back when I was in college. I hadn’t been there in a while and I sure as hell had never been there with anyone but my mom. It was our place. For whatever reason, it felt right taking Chloe there.

  Then I made the mistake of asking her what her and Sierra would do to celebrate. There was a mischievous glint her eyes. I’m fairly certain that everything she came up with, had less to do with Sierra and more to do with testing my limits. First it was shopping, then a ceramics class, and finally a pedicure. Sure, it wasn’t exactly the way I would choose to spend my day, but being with her? That made it all worth it.

  “Where are we?” she asks when the car comes to a stop.

  I pull the keys from the ignition. “Home.”

  Making my way around the car, I open her door and help her out. “I hope this okay. Dinner should be here soon.”

  “You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?”

  Her smile, it gets me every time. It chips away at the wall around my heart little by little, each time penetrating a little deeper. My rule says I need to walk away. It also says I never should have started anything. Still, every time she smiles, especially when it’s directed at me, I don’t give a damn about any of it.

  “Your home is beautiful,” she says as she stands in the middle of the living room taking everything in.

  “Not half as beautiful as the woman standing in it,” I say.

  She cracks a smile, “Smooth.”

  “It’s not a line. I don’t want to do that with you.” My arms wrap around her waist. Her head falls back against my chest and she looks up at me.

  “Then what is it you want to do with me?”

  That question right there opens up a can of worms. The things I want to do with this woman are unfathomable to me. As the day went on, I just… I got tired of fighting it. It’s why I brought her back here. And I’m damn glad I did. She looks good here and her being here, it feels good too. Having her makes it real, official even. This thing, me and her, it’s going to happen because as strong willed as I may be, when it comes to her, I have no self-restraint.

  Before I can answer the question and give her verbal and physical proof of everything I want to do to her, the doorbell rings. Dinner. And dessert. A special dessert that I hope to hell makes today better, not worse.

  “Wait, right here,” I tell her as I press a kiss to her shoulder before heading to answer the door.

  I pay the guy for the food and take it directly to the kitchen. It’s a beautiful night so I intend on having dinner on the patio, but her question is still in the forefront of my mind. The answer to it even more so.

  Rejoining her in the living room I find her at the sofa table, one of the photos that sits on it in her hands.

  “Is this your mom?”

  I nod, able to picture the photo perfectly in my head. It’s my mom and I at the park, some stupid selfie she took. When she died, I had it printed at put it in the frame. Stupid selfie or not, it’s the last picture we took together before she died.

  “Is this why you have the free ride home option at Lust?” she asks the question already knowing the answer.

  “I never want anyone to have to live through what you and I have. Losing someone is hard enough. Losing someone like that, so unnecessarily and unexpectedly is devastating. It doesn’t always work, but at least I do my part.” I point to the patio. “Want to eat out there?”

  She makes her way to the French doors that lead to the patio while I turn back to the kitchen to grab the food. When I come back, she’s seated at the table. She looks relaxed and at ease for the first time today.

  I place the burger in front of her. One of many things Chloe told me about her sister today, how much she loved a good cheeseburger. Their favorite place, somewhere close to their home, was too far to get on such short notice, but I did my best to improvise. “I know this isn’t your usual, but the burgers are out of this world.”

  “You’re too much,” she laughs. “Thank you.”

  I know she’s not just thanking me for the burger, but I don’t need her appreciation. I was happy to do it all. Spending today with her, it feels like it was just as much for me as it was for her.

  “Don’t thank me yet, you haven’t tried it”

  “No, I meant…”

  “I know what you meant. And it’s still not necessary.”

  A comfortable silence falls over us as we eat our dinner. On my end, I know it’s because I’m nervous about what comes next. Partly because I hope she likes it, partly because I’m afraid it’s going to make her sad again. And I hate it when she’s sad.

  I clear the table, refusing her help so I can get the cupcake out of the box and put the candle I requested on it. A single candle for Sierra’s first birthday in heaven. I’m not sure if it’s too much or not, but it seems like a better way to celebrate than at the bottom of a bottle of whiskey, like I did for my mom. I was alone. But Chloe, she isn’t. Not anymore. Not now that I’ve realized just how much I need her.

  Making my way back onto the patio, I set the plate with the single chocolate chip cupcake on it in front of her. Her eyes are locked on it, tears welling in them. I squat down next to her. “I thought we could sing. Celebrate her first birthday in heaven. If it’s too much…”

  “It’s perfect,” she whispers. With her voice soft, she begins the song. When a tear falls, landing on the table, I squeeze her hand and softly chime in with her.

  The song ends, but her words don’t. “Happy Birthday Sierra. I miss you more than you will ever know.” Putting her lips together, she blows out the candle.

  My heart aches at the pain that she’s experiencing. Every piece of me wanting to make it go away for her but knowing all too well that I can’t.

  Her head turns toward me and despite the hell she is enduring, she looks stunning. Tear-stained cheeks and all.

  “You are the most incredible person I have ever met,” she tells me. I feel like anything but for the way I’ve been treating her, but when her lips press against mine, I don’t refuse.

  In fact, I allow her to deepen the kiss. Her hands pulling me into her.

  “Are you sure about this?” I refuse to take advantage of her, not when she’s like this. But, maybe this is what she needs. And if that’s the case, I am more than willing to let her take from me whatever she needs, however she needs it.

  “I’m positive.”

  “Let’s go upstairs.”

  Her smile gives me the approval I need.

  I hold her hand as we ascend the stairs. The sun is setting casting a beautiful glow around her as she stands in the bedroom.

  My hands drop to her hips, softly tugging her against me.

  “I couldn’t have made it through today without you.” She presses her lips to mine as her hand finds my belt. “It means everything to me.” The sound of the zipper is deafening. “I am so grateful.” Chloe slowly falls to her knees, my cock already in her hand.

  “Chloe…”

  Much the way I silenced her with a kiss, she does the same. Her lips press to the head of my cock. Then sensation has me inhaling sharply. Her gratitude is making me fucking grateful. Christ her mouth feels good. Her mouth and her tongue, they work together slowly making their way up and down the length of me. My eyes close, my head falls back, and I groan every time she takes me deeper.

  Her mouth feels amazing, but I’ve been inside her. That is my heaven. That is where I want to be. I rest my hand gently on her head to ease her off me, but she has other ideas. In one motion she takes me, all of me, until I hit the back of her throat.

  “Oh, fuck, Chloe.”

  She doesn’t stop though. She just
keeps deep throating me, damn near bringing me to my knees. I’ve never had a woman work me like this. “Baby, if you don’t stop…”

  Her mouth pulls off me with a pop. “Told ya I knew all about pleasure.”

  Damn right she does.

  With my dick free of her heavenly mouth, I can think straight momentarily.

  “It’s my turn now.”

  “And just what do you…”

  Her sentence is cut off with a giggle as I toss her onto the bed.

  “First, I’m going to undress you,” I tell her as I make my way to her. I stand at the foot of the bed pulling my shirt over my head. “Then, I’m going to worship every inch of your body.”

  “You did plenty to my body that night,” she moans.

  “I’m happy to have pleased you, but that was nothing compared to what I plan on doing to you tonight.”

  I slide off her heels letting them drop to the floor before my hands lead the excursion up her tanned legs. It had been hell having to look at them all day, unable to touch them. Now, they are mine for the taking, and I intend to take. My hands run back down then follow my lips as they trail back up.

  I stop at her center. The shorts she’s wearing are covering the part of her that I so desperately want to taste. When I press my mouth there she still gasps. I like that she’s on edge. I like even more that I put her there. As I tease her through her clothing, I make haste with the button and zipper at the top of the shorts. As much fun is this is, I want the real thing. I rid her of any fabric below her waist; her shorts and this thing she calls panties and toss them haphazardly over my shoulder. With the swipe of my tongue I lick her whole seam, tasting her desire for me before pressing a kiss to her exposed stomach.

  My head pushes the tank top up to her breasts as my lips make my way there. With my teeth, I move the cup of her bra out of my way to take her taut nipple in my mouth. She gasps as I flick my tongue over it. Her body is so damn responsive to me, making my little worshiping session harder by the second. Another flick of my tongue just for good measure before I kneel on the bed.

  “Clothes are overrated,” I tell her, pulling her to a seated position so I can remove the rest of her clothing.

  When she’s completely free, completely naked, and completely mine, I push slightly on her shoulder. She falls back on the bed, her auburn hair fanned out around her. I’m in awe looking at her. Sweet perfection. A woman who is deserving of so much more than I could ever hope to give her. Me, a man that is so unworthy of someone as good as her. She makes me want to be worthy though, to work hard to be what she needs.

  “Chloe, I…”

  She presses a finger to my lips. “Not tonight. Just this. Just us.”

  I’m so fucking overcome with emotion and I almost make the biggest mistake of my life, expressing those feelings when she herself is an emotional wreck. If I were to tell her what’s in my head, today of all days, it would only be tainted by the sadness. A constant reminder of sorts. I nod. I accept her request and even more, I understand it. Not the time. Not for that at least. But, I can still give her myself, just not with words.

  My mouth crashes against hers in an emotion driven kiss. Every desire, every feeling for this woman comes out in this kiss. I consume her physically the way she has consumed me mentally since day one. When I manage to tear myself way, I make good on my promise, I worship her. I kiss every sensitive piece of flesh, trace every piece of skin with my fingers, until they find their way between her thighs. Her hips buck up, meeting my hand, begging it for more until I finally give in and slide a finger into her slick folds.

  Her nails dig into my biceps as she grinds against my hand, searching for her release. My name is a strangled cry as she gets closer, her grip on me tightening. My thumb presses against her clit and she loses control, her orgasm hitting her in waves that has her crying out.

  I remove my finger from her, bringing it to my lips to taste. “So, good.”

  “Please, Griffin.”

  “Please what?” I say coyly. I know what she’s begging for, but I want to hear it.

  “Fuck me, Griffin.”

  With pleasure. I position myself at her entrance and instantly regret allowing my cock to feel her silky goodness. Fucking condoms are clear across the room. “One second. Condoms.”

  Her hand is on my bicep. “I’m on birth control.”

  Her words shouldn’t mean dick to me. I’ve never had sex without a condom before, safety first. Hers, mine, and poor unplanned baby’s. When it comes to Chloe, I don’t give a fuck though. All I can think about is the feeling of her, skin on skin, nothing between us. I want her to know how much she means to me, how significant tonight is. I would tell her all that, but something tells me she already knows. So, I reposition myself and slowly ease into her. While I do, I thank fucking God that I saved this moment for her.

  She’s mine and I’m hers.

  My body covers hers, my movements are slow and deep to ensure that both of us feel every single thing. Her hands fist the sheets as her body moves with mine. Legs, wrapped around my waist, holding me to her. Her eyes flutter shut, her breath turning to pants and my name barely a whisper off her lips. Until it hits. Her pussy is tight around my cock, her knuckles white from gripping the sheets, and the “Oh fuck” she screams out is music to my goddamn ears.

  “Open your eyes,” I say as she comes down from her orgasm.

  When she does… my orgasm hits me like a ton of bricks. There are feelings and emotions that I don’t fucking understand. But her eyes, they hold me there as every wave rides through me. And the best part, everything I feel, I see it in her eyes too.

  She might hate me, but she sure as hell loves me, too.

  Rolling my spent body off her, I extend my arm to reach for her, pull her to me. Like Houdini, she’s gone already. I prop myself onto my elbow and watch her as she fumbles with her clothes.

  “What are you doing?” I ask.

  “It’s late. I should go.”

  Why is she always trying to run?

  “Stay.”

  “That’s sweet, but…”

  I move from the bed and position myself behind her. I turn her, forcing her to face me. I chose my words carefully. I need to let her know how much I want this without getting too deep into emotions. I need her to know that she’s special. She’s not a one night girl for me. Chloe’s the real deal. She’s the forever kind. And fuck, for the first time in a long time, I am thinking in forever’s and shit. “Chloe, I want you to stay. I want to hold you while I sleep. I want to make love to you again in the morning. I… I want us.”

  I’m not sure who’s more shocked by my admission, me or her. I want to give her the space she needs, but I can’t let her walk away. Not again. Thankfully, she seems to accept what I say to her.

  “So, that whole one-night thing,” she says.

  “Never planned on following that,” I admit.

  Snuggled against me, I feel her smile against my chest. “Me either.”

  Her fingers trace the outline of my abs. “These are spectacular.”

  “They’re all yours.”

  Her head pops up, her body shifting until her lips can trace over every ripple.

  Yep, they’re hers.

  Her head begins to move lower.

  I’m hers.

  25

  Chloe

  Nat is helping me get ready for tonight. It’s the club’s annual employee celebration and my first official date with Griffin. After everything we’ve been through and all the time we’ve spent together these past couple weeks, a first date seems futile. He insisted though. Who am I to turn down a date with the man that I think I am falling in love with?

  According to Griffin, he throws this party every year so the employees can receive the same amazing service that they provide to his customers. Every year he has it on his friend Hal’s yacht. Each employee is picked up from Lust in limos and driven to the dock. He really goes all out and the fact that he cares so much about h
is employees only makes me like him that much more.

  As if that’s really a hard feat. The man is hard to hate. He’s nothing like I expected, especially now that we’re together. He made me promise before he would let me leave his house the morning after Sierra’s birthday that I would give him a chance to prove himself. He has nothing to prove to me, not after that day. The way he took care of me, listened to me. The man who I thought he was is nothing compared to the man he actually turned out to be. Sure, he’s still arrogant and smug, but to be honest, he deserves to be. Every other damn piece of him is amazing.

  “This is so exciting,” Nat squeals as she puts on the finishing touches on my hair.

  I still haven’t dressed yet. I sit on the bed, staring at the box that had been delivered earlier. The note indicating it was from Griffin.

  “Will you just open it already so you can get dressed,” Nat says.

  “I’m just… it’s too much,” I say.

  “You don’t know that,” she argues.

  That’s where she’s wrong. I do know. I know Griffin. I know he has expensive taste. I just don’t feel comfortable accepting gifts from him especially when I know they cost way more than what I make in a week.

  I lift the lid on the box, the red fabric intertwined with small crystals is stunning. I hold the dress in front of me, partially unsure if I can pull it off, partially afraid to put it on. It’s too much. He’s too much.

  Me: I can’t accept this.

  Griffin: Why not?

  Me: It’s too much.

  Griffin: Consider it more of a gift for me, than for you. I can’t wait to see you in it. No arguments.

  The man is impossible. That much about him I was on target with. He doesn’t give up, he doesn’t take no for an answer. His club, his rules? More like his world, his rules. Rules that I don’t mind following. I’m just having a hard time coming to terms with everything that comes along being with Griffin.