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Poetry Collection Three: Interpersonal Transgressions

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by Ashley Rebecca Kingston


Poetry Collection Three:

  Interpersonal Transgressions

  Written and published by Ashley Rebecca Kingston

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic means

  including but not limited to; scanning or photocopying without the prior written consent of the copyright owner.

  Only exception being, is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.

  Copyright © 2016 Ashley Rebecca Kingston

  Published: November 24th 2016

  ISBN: 9781370097197

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favourite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  Authors Notes:

  With my poetry anthologies I am finally putting together; I am trying to collect and create different themes, different emotions, and different stories. With hopes some can experience something different today than the day before, through someone else’s eyes.

  The following poems are of my creation. My experiences, whether imagined or tactile in this reality. While a poem may be received and interpreted differently by different people, there are words and themes contained within these lines that some readers may find are not suitable for younger audiences.

  Contents:

  A Bee To A Flower - February.18.2013

  Not Over Him - November.14.2001

  Power Flows - November.29.2001

  Sewn And Unknown - December.14.2001

  Nonexistent - January.23.2002

  Forgive Me - January.23.2002

  Too Bad, Too Late - January.28.2002

  Kissing - January.30.2002

  Flirting - January.31.2002

  O’Rion - February.02.2002

  Falling Into - February.13.2002

  Burning Inside - February.16.2002

  What To Do - February.17.2002

  Cold Hands - February.18.2002

  If I Dared - February.22.2002

  I Had Plans - May.20.2002

  One Night - June.07.2002

  Not Yet - June.10.2002

  His Is Mine - June.14.2002

  But He Held Me - June.14.2002

  All Set - June.15.2002

  No Just Kiss And Run - July.10.2002

  To Need - July.26.2002

  A Chance - July.29.2002

  Dear Past Love - August.03.2002

  More And More - August.10.2002

  One - August.22.2002

  X Thing - August.25.2002

  Just My Friend - August.27.2002

  Stupid List - September.08.2002

  No Cares - September.12.2002

  You'll Come Back To Me - September.20.2002

  He’s Single Again - September.22.2002

  No Beliefs Anymore - September.26.2002

  Little Boy - September.27.2002

  Love Hate Relationship - October.02.2002

  Liking Her In That Way - October.18.2002

  Hoping It Was More - October.18.2002

  Ignoring Scared Man - October.21.2002

  Deep Love - October.23.2002

  Pain In My Discovery - October.24.2002

  That Lyle-ing Man - October.27.2002

  That Lyle-ing Man II - October.28.2002

  No I Can Not - November.11.2002

  For Sure - November.16.2002

  Only One Way Out - December.14.2002

  Pleasuring - January.01.2003

  Wrap Around - January.05.2003

  Washing - January.06.2003

  Stupid Me Hurting - January.22.2003

  I Danced Anyway - January.24.2003

  Fine Line - January.30.2003

  Why Do I Keep Stupidly Running - February.03.2003

  Totally Flirting With Her - February.15.2003

  My William - March.01.2003

  Two Girls In Naivety - April.15.2003

  A Fetish Thing - April.23.2003

  I Tell You All - March.29.2004

  A Bee To A Flower

  February.18.2013

  his words cling to my heart, like a bee to its flower

  wanting more and more, even after he has had his fill

  Not Over Him

  November.14.2001

  over him, i fall

  i’d do anything, for him to even call

  over him, i’ll never be

  i’d do anything, for him to see

  over him, i am not even me

  i’d do anything, to just be

  over him, I am nothing no more

  i’d die right now, even if i’d be just sore

  over him, i fall

  i’d do anything, for him to even call

  over him, i’ll never be

  i’d do anything, for him to just see me

  Power Flows

  November.29.2001

  The water flows, and I hold you inside… I need to feel you, I need to try and hide.

  The feeling of drums, beating inside my chest… I need to feel your heart, beating harder inside.

  The waters flow, I keep you inside… Because I know I’ll feel empty, without you in my mind.

  The waters flow, I tightly hold you inside… I need to feel you, a yearning and aching in losing control.

  Beating and flowing, harder yet so soft… Burning what is left, of my lonely insides.

  Sewn And Unknown

  December.14.2001

  Lay her softly down, watch her curls flow about.

  Feel her skin move, watch her eyelashes flutter.

  The passion and power, igniting love not lust.

  Over powers his groins, to have her he must.

  The moment will last, seeds will be sewn.

  So many things, left to be unknown.

  Nonexistent

  January.23.2002

  I feel like I don’t exist

  he hung up on me

  I cried and tried to scream

  it hurts to breathe

  I know no one knows

  I have no one to hold

  I’ll just keep it all in

  until I explode

  I have so much to give

  yet I am nonexistent

  I’ll cry until I bleed

  I wish I would not eat

  I want to smash something

  I almost wish I were dead

  I don’t fucking exist

  so why am I even here

  why do I have to wake up

  waking up to nothing each morning

  just sitting and thinking

  what we really are

  why we can’t stay in love

  and why I can’t have him

  but who am I to think of him

  and who am I to mourn for a year

  who the fuck am I who loves him

  and who am I to cry

  who am I to weep on my pillow

  who am I to not deny love

  who am I to think I know what love is

  it hurts to breathe

  I need to be free of this

  I need pills or alcohol

  I think I need someone to help me

  while I continue to disappear within

  to be truly nonexistent

  Forgive Me

  January.23.2002

  Hello my love… I whispered

  as I walked right through your front door

  c
razy boy as always it was unlocked…

  Forgive my rude intrusion, I know I shouldn’t be here

  but I have nowhere else to be

  I didn’t look through your stuff

  I’d never do that to you

  I didn’t write you a letter

  I didn’t even knock on your door

  I know I always come uninvited

  But would you forgive me my love

  If I stood and danced in your room

  Would you forgive me love… if I took off all my clothes

  if I wrapped myself in your bathrobe and breathed you in deep

  Would you forgive me love… if I fell asleep for a moment in your bed

  if I just thought of you in every moment of every day since you left

  But would you forgive me my love

  I noticed a letter on your beside table

  Would you forgive me love… for my fingers opened it up

  my eyes saw the words that were neatly written inside

  “I love you so my dear, see you later tonight…”

  Would you forgive me love… I shouldn’t be here

  the letter was not in my writing, and I know I shouldn’t be here

  Forgive me love, for I wept in your shower…

  for my tears on your bed, for ever entering your life

  Forgive me love, for loving you so much

  and for just wanting you to be happy…

  But would you forgive me my love

  for not leaving a note, for not leaving you alone

  Would you forgive me love… for my tears on your pillow

  Would you forgive me love… for I will always love you

  Too Bad, Too Late

  January.28.2002

  It’s too bad, you’re too late, you’ve lost everything with me.

  You’re way too late to realize your mistakes now, you stupid cruel man.

  It’s too bad, you’re too late, you’ve lost everything we created.

  It’s too fucking bad, you’re way too late to find me again.

  You left without really saying goodbye

  All I wanted was one last kiss farewell

  I never did ask too much of you

  But to break up with me in person

  You fucking men, drive me fucking mad

  I don’t ask for much but everything

  You left without really saying goodbye

  All I wanted was one last kiss farewell

  I never did ask too much of you

  I don’t ask for much but everything

  Kissing

  January.30.2002

  light shining over us

  ... lips barely touching

  voices quiet and slow

  hands grasping onto

  .. anything of each other

  light shining over us

  .. lips pressing against lips

  hands holding onto

  arms tightly wrapped around

  .. our bodies lay intertwined

  light shining somewhere

  .. sparks shimmer when we touch

  happiness when we smile

  .. kissing means so much

  I’ll never not be touched by you

  Flirting

  January.31.2002

  flirting with my fingers

  fluttering my eyelashes

  fiddling and flipping my hair

  flashing you my big smile

  blushing at your starry glance

  wondering if I am good enough

  too shy to even say a word

  wondering what your lips taste like

  being careful that I eat gracefully

  wondering if all you want is just sex

  feeling cold underneath my dress

  wondering what your hands would feel like

  flirting with my fingers

  fluttering my eyelashes

  fiddling with my hair

  flashing you my big smile

  O’Rion

  February.02.2002

  My sweet shining stars up above me

  I’ve loved you far too hard

  But never will I ever forget

  What our love really is inside

  And who you really are sweet star

  Is beyond the powers of this place

  Dreams will lead you into your future

  And memories of me will finally escape

  My sweet shining stars above me

  I’ve loved you for far too long

  But I will never forget any of you

  Or what your love has meant to me

  My sweet shining cluster of stars

  You light up my dark skies at night

  I stand and I just stare at your giving love

  For I’d love to be with you up above

  My sweet shining stars up above me

  I’ve loved you far too hard

  But never will I ever forget

  What our love really is inside

  Falling Into

  February.13.2002

  falling in love

  falling in lust

  dying in bed

  dying without trust

  falling all over

  what once was

  lost in the shadows

  lost not if i must

  falling out of love

  falling out of lust

  asleep in my bed

  lying in your dust

  what there was once

  is now not again

  so much time

  wasted with him

  falling in love

  falling in lust

  dying in bed

  dying without trust

  falling all over

  what once was

  lost in the shadows

  lost not if i must

  Burning Inside

  February.16.2002

  burning inside my soul, inside my body he flows

  inside of my own body, between my knees

  he tightly grasps my hips, while he flows in the seas

  taking that what there is, to try to make me his

  I’d give anything to feel, him inside of me

  but what do I do, when it all means more

  this could be wrong, but I want to feel right

  all in all, all of me is in plain sight

  What To Do

  February.17.2002

  I do like him so much

  The time that we’ve spent together

  The interesting conversations

  But I’ve talked to everyone,

  and I know the trouble is his age,

  otherwise I’d shut up about it and just jump in.

  But what should I do…

  When it could be wrong

  I could perhaps be wrong

  But I always feel wrong

  But what should I do…

  If I do like him so much

  But his age is what is being talked about

  But I really don’t care

  If I do really like him

  It’s my heart and my eyes,

  is what he says he sees in me.

  But I really don’t know…

  What I can and can’t do

  Like I’m a child having to follow rules

  What do I do, when I could be wrong…

  But being wrong isn’t the point

  My point is he is a lot older

  And that I do like him a lot

  But there are boundaries around us

  Cold Hands

  February.18.2002

  so warm but cold

  his hands burn my skin

  even if he is not near

  and I try to see

  anything but him

  but I saw him caress

  the table by my side

  I had to look away

  because my insides

  turned and flipped into a knot

  but he is all I have

  for now until forever

  to never find the end

  I
have almost nothing

  I crave to be with him

  but I kick and fight all the way

  with myself through his eyes

  nothing really matters

  but I have a lot to say

  he is so hot to the touch

  his body is not mine

  he says he loves my eyes

  I try to make him deny

  but he is nice and knowledgeable

  I like age but not more confusion

  my hands are so cold

  because I am unsure

  as to what I should do

  with fighting myself

  so warm but cold

  his hands burn me

  and I try to see

  anything but him

  If I Dared

  February.22.2002

  If I dared to touch his hand, I fear I wouldn’t ever let go

  If I dared to look him in his eyes, I fear I wouldn’t look away

  If I dared to speak my mind, I know I’d just look like a fool

  If I dared to care too much, I know I’d end up broken again

  Just to know how stupid I am, to not leave well enough alone

  I just don’t understand why I can’t let go, and just walk away

  To forget or not even know, to just go on by myself

  Why do I feel like I always need, someone else to live my life

  I fear I wouldn’t ever let go

  I fear I wouldn’t look away

  I know I’d just look like a fool

  I know I’d end up broken again

  To dare to not assume my fate

  I Had Plans

  May.20.2002

  I had plans to marry him

  I had plans to make love to him

  I had everything I am in him

  You made my world stand still

  You made me wish you ill

  You made me fall in love with you

 

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