Attempted Vampirism

by L. G. Estrella

  “Argh!”

  Eric stepped to one side as a heavily armoured man sailed through the air toward him. The other man clattered into the ground and then skidded along until he struck a wall and fell still. He was still alive, but he wouldn’t be getting up any time soon. “Hmm… interesting. I don’t think I could have thrown him that far.”

  Things got more interesting. A moment later, an armoured woman rode in on a bear – while fighting off half a dozen paladins from one of the most zealous holy orders in the world. This wasn’t the first time he’d seen someone ride a bear. He’d met elves who rode bears into battle. However, it was the first time he’d seen a bear summoning wooden signs for it and its rider to use as projectiles or melee weapons.

  “Am I hallucinating? Did that bear just summon a wooden sign, so it could club a paladin over the head?”

  “No,” Blue Scales replied. “Unless we are both hallucinating the same thing.”

  Blazing light surrounded the armoured woman.

  [Armour of Faith].

  Eric’s eyes widened. He knew that Word. It was a miracle that was only ever granted to the most loyal servants of certain gods. The armoured woman must be a paladin too, and one favoured by whichever god she served.

  “Heretic!” one of the other paladins screamed. “[Spear of Perdition]!”

  That was another miracle, one of the stronger ones going around. Eric had seen it annihilate most evil or unholy entities in a single hit, and it could tear through obstacles like rock, stone, or metal like they weren’t even there. The woman didn’t even slow down. The spear of light shattered against her like glass, and she grabbed a wooden sign and slapped the other paladin across the face with it. He stumbled back, and her next strike caught him in the throat. Eric’s lips curled. Something like [Spear of Perdition] should have done some damage, even against [Armour of Faith]… unless the god who had granted the downed paladin [Spear of Perdition] didn’t like what it was being used for.

  “Impossible!” Another paladin ducked under a sign and backed away as the bear sent one of his fellows flying with a nasty swipe of its claws. A third paladin reeled as the woman deflected his sword with her buckler and then jabbed him in the face with a wooden sign. “You should be dead!”

  “Don’t you get it? Our god doesn’t want you to strike me down,” the woman shouted back. “Now, leave. I’d rather not kill you all, but I will if I have to.”

  They didn’t leave, and the woman lived up to her word. In a way, it was merciful. These paladins were in vampire territory, and they were most definitely uninvited. Death would have been the least of their worries, and it certainly wouldn’t have been quick either. Indeed, as much as vampires and werewolves despised each other, there was also a healthy level of respect. Werewolves, after all, did not adopt a holier-than-thou attitude, and they had the decency to pick a fight the proper way – with lots of roaring, posturing, and very little holy magic. Once the battle was over, the woman hopped off the bear and began to rifle through the pockets of her foes. Several small shadowy figures joined her, and Eric sniffed the air. Those things were imps of some kind.

  “You’re going to rob them?” Eric asked.

  The woman stared at him for a second. “Do you realise that you’re completely naked?”

  Eric shrugged. “I was enjoying a nice, relaxing soak in the hot springs until the explosions started and you and your bear showed up.” To his disbelief, the bear snickered and held up a sign while somehow managing to waggle its eyebrows suggestively. His eyes widened as he read the sign. “Did your bear just compliment my appearance?”

  The woman turned her head, read the sign, and groaned. “Eileen, stop ogling him.” The bear turned the sign around to reveal more writing. “No! I am not going to take a closer look!” She tossed Eric a towel. It must have been thrown to the ground by one of the explosions. “Put that on, please.”

  Eric considered arguing but eventually decided to humour her. He put the towel on – on his head. “You’re really going to rob them?”

  The woman made a face. “Believe me, I’d rather not, but I gave them a chance to leave. If people are going to try to murder my friend and me, then I’m not going to feel bad about killing them first and taking what we need to survive.”

  “Fair enough.” Eric grinned. He liked her attitude. Indeed, he made a point of robbing any bandits who tried to rob him. Maybe it would teach them a lesson – at least, the ones he didn’t poke holes in with his spear. There was a commotion from nearby, and he picked out the clank of armour as well as angry yelling and cursing. “It sounds like you’ve got more company coming.”

  The woman scowled. “Damn it. Of course, there’s more of them, and the authorities won’t be far behind either.” She nodded at the bear. “Come on, Eileen. We need to move. We’re in enough trouble as it is.” She tossed a pouch at Eric. “Something to compensate you for your trouble. If anyone asks, say the debris made it hard to see us. If they keep asking, we’d appreciate it if you said we went that way.” The woman pointed and then rode off in the opposite direction.

  Eric watched her and the bear leave. “That was weird.”

  Blue Scales laughed. “Yes. Yes, it was. I might not be from the surface, but even I can tell that was unusual.” He glanced at the pouch as Eric opened it. There were coins inside. “So… will you do as she asked?”

  “Damn straight I will. This is the most interesting thing we’ve run into all month.”

  Eric didn’t expect to see the woman or her bear again, but life, it seemed, was full of surprises.

  “This mission would pay well,” Eric said as he showed Blue Scales the poster. The merman had not been very good at reading the various scripts used by surface-dwelling people when they’d met, but Eric had been happy to teach him. His friend was clever, and it hadn’t taken him long to grow first passable and then proficient. In return, Blue Scales had taught him the languages of the Deep although Eric doubted he’d be heading underwater anytime soon. Not being able to breathe underwater would make any visit to Blue Scales’s homeland both short and fatal. “But we’d need more people to do it.”

  “We could try it with only the two of us, but there is a difference between courage and suicide.” The lizards the mission wanted them to hunt down were large, venomous beasts that could also shoot barbed spines at people. The spines could easily punch through armour at close range, and the venom that coated them was extremely deadly. Luckily, the lizards weren’t very clever, and they were sluggish during winter. Eric and Blue Scales could easily have handled up to a dozen of them with the right planning and preparation. However, the mission called for the elimination of several dozen lizards – and in their own lair to boot.

  “You’re interested in that mission too?”

  Eric turned. He thought he’d picked up a familiar scent. It was the woman from the hot springs, and her bear was there too. The animal gave him a jaunty wave. “Thank you. You didn’t tell them which way we went. Otherwise, they’d have caught up to us.”

  “It seemed like you had enough problems.” Eric nodded at the poster. “My friend and I are interested, but it’s not the sort of job two people can take on their own.”

  “No, it’s not.” The woman gave him a thoughtful look. “But the pay is very, very good. You and your friend can’t do it, and neither can Eileen and I. But if the four of us worked together…”

  “We might be able to pull it off.” Eric smiled, but his eyes were steel. “That sounds like a wonderful idea – assuming you and your bear don’t betray me and my big, blue friend over there.”

  “Please,” the woman replied. “You don’t have to worry about us betraying you. We’re in enough trouble as it is.” Her gaze flicked to Blue Scales. “I’m not stupid either. Any merman who can survive this far from the ocean for this long has to be extremely powerful. You’re a werewolf too – Eileen can smell it. The fact that you two have managed to make a living as adventurers in vampire territory tells me that
you’re both very good. You wouldn’t have survived this long otherwise.” Her voice softened. “If you’re in here, then you and your friend are both members of the Adventurers’ Union. Eileen and I are members too. We’ve got a good record, and we’ve worked well with others before. We can each ask the Union about the other. If we each like what we hear, maybe we can work together. If not, we can go our separate ways.”

  “That’s not a bad idea.” Eric stuck out his hand. “I’m Eric, and my friend there is Blue Scales.”

  The woman shook his hand. “I’m Aria. The bear – or bear for the time being – is Eileen.”

  “A bear for the time being?”

  “It’s complicated.” Aria’s lips twitched. “Although you don’t really think she’s a normal bear, do you?”

  “No. Normal bears can’t summon wooden signs, and they definitely don’t know how to use those signs as weapons. All right, Aria. We’ll do it your way. Let’s go talk to the Union.” He smirked. “If nothing else, you and Eileen seem interesting, and I like interesting. Who knows? Maybe this is the start of a beautiful friendship.”

  Eric couldn’t have been more right. One successful mission together turned into two and then three, and it wasn’t much longer before it felt like the four of them had always been a team. If someone had told him years ago that he’d be travelling around with a mountain of a merman, a shape-shifter who couldn’t turn back into her original form, and a former paladin with a death order hanging over her head, he’d have called them crazy. But, hey, what could be more interesting than that?

  Life decided to answer by introducing them to a vampire and his butler.

  Part Three – A Crimson Shadow

  After a few more days of travel, the manor that Baron Darkletter had told them about finally came into view. They had run into some more of the twisted fledglings, but they were easier to deal with now that they knew what to expect. Jonathan had also assured the others that once the culprit was dealt with, anything related to him should fade as well.

  Aria had sent a message to the baron via one of Eileen’s shadow imps, and the older vampire had dispatched several groups into the forest to eliminate any fledglings they might have missed. The excuse he’d used was that several ‘deranged’ groups of unaffiliated vampires had been attacking travellers. As a noble of good standing and considerable means, it was his duty to handle them. It was self-serving, but Jonathan didn’t mind. He was happy knowing that someone was going to do something about any stray fledglings. The last thing they needed was one of those horrors escaping and somehow spreading the corruption.

  For his part, Jonathan was not an especially superstitious man. However, in a world full of vampires, werewolves, eldritch beings, and who knew what else, a certain level of superstition was not only expected but also prudent. The manor in front of them radiated danger. From its crumbling, gothic façade looming behind an archaic and twisted iron fence amidst one of the deepest, darkest parts of the forest to its boarded up windows and the eerily strong wind that seemed to emanate from it, this was either the most cliché setting for a horror story he’d ever seen or a bizarre coincidence. He knew vampires had a flair for the dramatic, but this was silly. It was hard to imagine a more ominous locale for a mission than the manor in front of him. The manor even had a wide, murky moat.

  “Okay.” Jonathan cleared his throat nervously. Once they went in, there would be no turning back. “Let’s take one more look at the map we have of the manor. I know we’ve already reviewed it, but it might be good to have another look before we go in. We may not get the chance to consult it once we go inside.”

  Aria smiled thinly. “It’s always a good idea to go over any plans you might have before you start. Once things get hectic, it’s easy to forget.”

  Jonathan waited for Aria to take out the map before pointing to it. “Baron Darkletter thinks the dagger should still be in the reliquary, but we can’t know for sure. Once we’re inside, I have some Words and Signs that can help us locate it.”

  “Why does this place have to be so big?” Eric grumbled and gestured at the map. “It’s big enough above ground, but these underground areas don’t look good at all. We’re just begging to get ambushed if we go down there. It’s like a maze.”

  Jonathan shuddered. He wasn’t looking forward to going underground either. “It might seem unusual, but it isn’t. Vampires, as you all know, do not handle sunlight well. In fact, if I could guarantee that one of you could handle the dagger, I’d have suggested going in during the day.” The others all sighed, but there was no escaping it. Jonathan understood the dagger best, so they were going in at night. “However, some vampires enjoy moving around during the day. Unfortunately, moving around above ground can be dangerous. Windows can be broken, and walls can be damaged. Having a sizeable cellar or tunnel complex is much safer. There’s no way for the sun to get you.”

  “I guess.” Eric shrugged. “Let’s go over the plan again.”

  Aria ran one finger along the map. “I’ve done missions like this before… back when I was with my order. If we have to wade through every single thing that’s likely to be waiting for us, we’ll lose. However, if we can fight them piecemeal and get Jonathan to the dagger, we should be okay. Charging in there and hoping for the best is basically suicide.”

  “Which is why we’ll be sealing off sections as we go, right?” Eric grinned. “We’ve already fought these things. The first bunch was tough, but we’ve had practice. They’re not so bad once you get used to them. As long as we can keep them from overwhelming us through pure numbers, we should be okay.”

  “Exactly. If you look at the layout of the manor, you can see that its been designed so some of the rooms act as chokepoints or defensible locations. We can use those to section off the manor.” Aria looked at each of them. The certainty in her gaze was reassuring. This was something she’d done before, and she was still alive and in one piece, so she ought to know what she was dong. “We don’t – and we can’t – clear the whole manor. All we need to do is to clear a path to the dagger while ensuring we keep a line of retreat secure in case something goes wrong. I can use my magic to seal off parts of the manor, and some of Eileen’s summons can help too.”

  “I used a similar strategy once,” Blue Scales murmured. “When one of my people’s enemies retreated into a great fortress, we were able to breach the walls. There were too many of them to fight head on, so we took the fortress section by section. By controlling when and where we fought, we were able to avoid being overrun.”

  “That’s the idea. We cut off a piece of the manor and make it safe, and then we do it again and again and however many more times we need to. If something goes wrong, we fall back to one of the chokepoints or defensive locations. We can thin their numbers that way. If they’re careless, we can even stage a few false retreats and really take the battle to them.”

  “If they’re cunning,” Miles pointed out. “Such retreats could still buy us a few moments of rest since they will be wary of pursuing if they suspect a trap.”

  “Just be careful.” Jonathan frowned. “This is a very old manor. Baron Darkletter has admitted that the tunnels beneath it are not fully mapped, so there’s a chance they could surprise us. If worse comes to worst, he did say the manor is expendable, albeit only if we are absolutely out of other options. We also won’t be getting paid as much if we destroy the manor.”

  Eric smirked. “More pay is good – being alive is better.”

  “All right.” Aria nodded firmly. “Now that we’re clear on the plan, we need to get moving. Eric, you’re up front. You’ve got the keenest senses of any of us. Jonathan, I want you in the middle. Blue Scales, you and me are just behind Eric. Eileen, you’re bringing up the rear. Miles, stay with Jonathan.” She put the map away. “Step one: cross the moat.”

  “Hah! You say that like it’ll be hard.” Eric had more than a little swagger in his step. “There’s nothing on the map about the moat. We’ll be fine.”

>   Jonathan almost wanted to scream. Was Eric trying to tempt fate?

  They were halfway across the bridge over the moat when a tentacle burst out of the water. It was a very, very big tentacle.

  “What is that?” Eric shouted as the tentacle came a few inches from squashing him flat. He stabbed at it with his spear, and the tip of his weapon bit deeply into the tentacle. The limb recoiled, but several more emerged from the murky waters of the moat. Each of them was as thick as a tree trunk. “There’s something alive in there!”

  “Hmm…” Jonathan stumbled away from the closest tentacle. “There’s nothing on the map about this. Maybe the baron forgot to add it to the map because he didn’t consider it a threat. Many vampire nobles like having exotic… pets, and they usually raise them from birth to ensure their loyalty.”

  “A lion or a salamander would be an exotic pet. There’s a damn giant squid in the moat!” Eric leapt over a tentacle and then rolled to avoid another. “I think that’s a little bit more than exotic.”

  “Actually, based on what I’ve seen of the tentacles, I think it’s more likely to be a giant octopus than a giant squid.”

  “I don’t think the difference matters!”

  Blue Scales laughed uproariously. He waved his trident and roared a Word, and the movements of the giant octopus slowed. Was he doing something to the water? Probably. “This reminds me of home.” Another wave of his trident created a sphere of water that he hurled at the monstrosity. The water around it exploded, and it roared in defiance. “If this beast is what I think it is, then it would go wonderfully with some fresh kelp and sea urchins.”

  “Perhaps we should deal with it before we consider the culinary possibilities.” Miles twisted to avoid one tentacle and then punched. The shockwave of the blow almost threw Jonathan off his feet, but the creature seemed more angry than hurt. It heaved itself out of the water with a roar, and Jonathan recoiled as he laid eyes on it.