Eva's Man
Page 14
How?
Like you could kill me. Like you could just kill me, baby.
Kill you this way.
I like you a lot, Eva. I like you a whole lot.
You’ve got your heart in your knees.
What? Come closer.
Yes.
What did he do to you, Eva?
I don’t know. How should I know. I don’t know. I don’t know. That was all I could do.
What was all you could do?
But I won’t hurt you.
Eva?
I said I won’t hurt you.
Eva?
What?
You seem like a lonely woman.
No.
All that blood you raised. Come over here.
No.
What’s your name?
Eva. I been a lot of places. I been in New Orleans. I been out in New Mexico.
You lying.
No I’m not. I been just about everywhere.
You seem like a lonely woman.
You thought you were a bad woman, so you went out and got you a bad man.
Don’t explain me.
And then you . . . Matron? Matron! Hold her! Hold her!
I hold up my arms.
“You have blood on you,” I say.
“You’d do anything for me, wouldn’t you, woman?” he says.
“You have blood on you.”
I open my fingers. I see a slop jar in the corner of the room. Two glasses of water.
“Whereabouts you from, lady?”
“Whereabouts.”
“Swallow me. Swallow me up. I know what kind of woman you are.”
“Naw you don’t.”
“I do.”
I kiss his neck and mouth.
“I like the way you wear your hair, but I forgot your name.”
“Eva.”
“Are your breasts sore?”
“Naw.”
“Sometimes women’s breasts gets sore around this time.”
“Mine don’t.”
“Put your head in my lap.”
“I’m not tired.”
He laughs. He hands me money.
“You know you the woman. Kill him, but don’t make him bleed.” He holds my shoulders. “I said kill him, but don’t make him bleed. How long has it been?”
“Two years.”
“How long?”
“Five years.”
“I like you, Eva. I like you a lot.”
“Do you care about me?”
“Yes.”
I open my fingers.
“I can’t do it, Davis.”
“Come on, woman.”
He laughs. He holds my shoulders again.
“Do you care about me? . . . You not talking? How long has it been, woman?”
I look at him. I kiss him. “A long time.”
“What did I do for you, Eva? What did you feel?”
“Everything.”
He pushes my face into his lap. He combs my hair with his long fingers. I am afraid.
We are in the river now. We are in the river now. The sand is on my tongue. Blood under my nails. I’m bleeding under my nails. We are in the river. Between my legs. They are busy with this woman. They are busy with this woman now. They are busy with this woman . . .
“What do you want, Eva?”
“What?”
“What do you want?”
“Nothing you can give.”
An owl sucks my blood. I am bleeding underneath my nails. An old owl sucks my blood. He gives me fruit in my palms. We enter the river again . . . together.
They are doing with this woman. See. They are doing with this woman. See what they are doing with this woman.
Last night she got in the bed with me, Davis. I knocked her out, but I don’t know how long I’m going to keep knocking her out . . .
“Tell me when it feels sweet, Eva. Tell me when it feels sweet, honey.”
I leaned back, squeezing her face between my legs, and told her, “Now.”
Beacon Press
Boston, Massachusetts
www.beacon.org
Beacon Press books
are published under the auspices of
the Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations.
© 1976 by Gayl Jones
First published as a Beacon paperback in 1987
by arrangement with Random House, Inc.
All rights reserved
Text design and composition by Daniel Barks
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Eva’s Man / Gayl Jones.
(Celebrating Black Women Writers)
I. Title. II. Series.
[PS3560.0483E9 1987 813’54 86—47751
ISBN 978-0-8070-2899-5 (pbk.)
ISBN 978-0-8070-2904-6 (ebook)