Karma Is A Bitch: An Urban Fantasy Action Adventure (The Unbelievable Mr. Brownstone Book 12)

by Michael Anderle

  “Now Tyler sends his underlings,” the Eyes offered in a voice barely above a whisper. “Does he fear me so much, Kathy?”

  The Eyes already knows my name? I didn’t even tell that asshole at the front.

  Kathy shrugged. “Probably.”

  “Do you?”

  She considered lying for a second, but there didn’t seem to be a point. “Yes.”

  A wheezing laugh followed. “Why?”

  Kathy shrugged. “Because I don’t know what the fuck you are, so I can’t even begin to figure out how to deal with you.”

  The creature jumped to another shadowy corner in an instant. “What do you know, then? This is your one chance to impress me. The only reason I do business with Tyler is that he impressed me at our first meeting. If you fail, you will leave this place with nothing. If you fail severely, you won’t leave this place at all.”

  She swallowed, her heart thundering. Her first instinct was to yell he couldn’t get away with killing her and that Tyler knew where she was, but she didn’t voice the thought. The Eyes killed all sorts of people and got away with it.

  “You have a body,” she blurted. “Even though it’s hard to see. I think it’s right where we’d think it should be, however weird it might look.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  Kathy forced her most triumphant grin onto her face. “Pure observation.”

  The glowing yellow orbs wandered from the shadows until they stared right into Kathy’s eyes from inches away. “Explain your observation, little girl.”

  Kathy took a deep breath and slipped her hands into her pockets so he couldn’t see them shaking. “This place. It’s too secure if you’re the ghost you want to pretend you are. Why the big bouncer?”

  The Eyes let out another wheezing laugh. “That’s it? That’s your great proof? I have clients who are indisposed and not capable of protecting themselves. Security is necessary for their benefit, not mine.”

  “Bullshit,” Kathy shouted. She winced.

  Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m not dealing with Tyler here. I need to watch my mouth.

  He moved closer until his yellow eyes were so close they were almost touching hers. A biting chill stabbed Kathy’s face, and she grimaced and forced her own eyes to stay open.

  “Explain,” the creature demanded. “Choose your next words carefully. If they are wrong, you die right here, right now.”

  Kathy managed to keep her body from trembling, even though every instinct in every cell screamed for her to turn and run from the monster in front of her. “The Kilomea might be there to protect your guests, but you have guards in front of your room; guards who disarm people.” She shook her head, her heart still pounding but her confidence building. “That doesn’t make sense if you’re a bodiless demon. If you were immune to guns, you wouldn’t care. You’d let someone shoot you and laugh in their face, and you don’t have the Kilomea take the guns, so you’re less concerned about someone shooting a guest than you claim.” She shrugged. “Not saying someone could take you out with a single shot, but obviously you can be shot. You can probably bleed.”

  The Eyes backed up several feet and took his chill with him. “A deception, perhaps.”

  Kathy shook her head. “You like being theatrical. It’d make more sense for you to let someone try to shoot you. I don’t know why we can’t see your body, if it’s naturally like that or it’s a spell, but I do know if say, James Brownstone came here and decided to kick your ass, you might be in trouble. Even the Eyes can know fear.”

  Complete silence gripped the room. Kathy’s heart beat harder as the seconds ticked away.

  The Eyes’ barking laugh turned into a wheeze. “You impress me, little girl. Let’s talk about your threat—your Brownstone. That’s why you’re here, isn’t it?”

  Kathy nodded quickly. “Someone’s trying to kill him. He wants to know who.”

  “What will you give me for this information?”

  She shrugged. “What do you want?”

  He winked back into the original shadowy corner where she’d first spotted his eyes. “Will you give me anything I ask?”

  “I might be inexperienced, but I’m not a fucking moron. There’s no way I’ll give you anything you want.”

  “Clever girl.” The Eyes chuckled. “A freebie, to welcome you to your new world. Next time, it’ll cost a lot more, and there may be a test.”

  Kathy narrowed her eyes. “A test?”

  “I see…potential in you. Younger, more flexible in mind. Brave. Braver than Tyler. Sharper. His mind sees only money. Your hunger is different, deeper. More fundamental.”

  She couldn’t stop the tremors of revulsion that passed through her. “Okay, then. We can…talk about different tests and projects in the future, but what about the information I came for?”

  “One left,” the Eyes wheezed. “One left from the Council. Not a traitor, but not really one of them. He Who Hunts. He craves more now, and Brownstone is the key to something grand…awful or good, I can’t say, but grand. He’s sent men.”

  Kathy looked down for a moment and nodded. “Where is this…thing hiding?”

  “I won’t tell you.”

  “Can’t or won’t.”

  The Eyes disappeared. “Maybe both,” he whispered into her face.

  Her skin crawled. “Is there anything else about it?”

  “Brownstone has already felt their touch. Others have as well. Look for the signs. Look for the tunnels.”

  Kathy stepped back toward the door, sensing she wasn’t going to get much more and wanting to get far, far away from the Eyes and take a shower. “Thank you.”

  When she turned around, she found the glowing yellow eyes right front of her. She hissed in surprise.

  “I’ll be watching,” the Eyes whispered. “Watching to see if you’re worth my further attention.”

  He disappeared again and Kathy rushed for the double doors, throwing both open, snatching her purse from the gnome and running down the hall.

  Heather tapped on her keyboard, trying to narrow down possible locations. From what James had passed along to her, he was being targeted by the last remnants of the Council and their base of operations might be associated with tunnels somehow.

  She sighed and shook her head. It wasn’t exactly like Los Angeles had a shortage of tunnels.

  A click of the mouse brought up a window filled with search query hits, a mix of unusual sightings associated with either tunnels or anything near tunnels.

  Heather narrowed her eyes and clicked on the third entry on her list with a frown.

  “Strange sightings near abandoned subway tunnels,” she murmured. “On the same day James was attacked.”

  On a hunch, Heather clicked to another window, a missing person database. She performed a search for Los Angeles County starting the day of James’ attack. She then checked the same time interval before the day of James’ attack.

  A pretty big uptick. Why hasn’t this been in the news?

  Heather scanned the list and ran searches on some of the missing people. The pattern became clear quickly: runaways, prostitutes, and street people for the most part. The kinds of victims that a city was willing to ignore or at least not pay special attention to.

  Her stomach twisted, and she sucked in a breath. She wasn’t naïve enough to believe any of those people were still alive.

  If I correlate the missing person reports with the subway tunnel sightings, I can probably narrow down the location and get James a search area at least.

  Heather took a deep breath and slapped her cheeks. If the missing people were victims of the last remnants of the Council, it might be too late to save them, but it wasn’t too late to get revenge for them.

  James grunted into his phone as he stood in his kitchen. “Thanks, Heather. Sounds like you’ve got a good general location. Maybe prep some drones for recon, but don’t send any into the tunnels yet. I’ll talk to you soon.” He ended the call and slipped his phone back into his pocket
.

  Shay watched him from the dining room chair, her arms crossed. “What’s the word?”

  “From what Heather could find, the assholes still have guys in town, and they’re probably killing innocent people in abandoned subway tunnels.” James frowned. “Fuckers. I knew I should have issued a public challenge. They’re killing people every day I don’t finish him off, and we still only have a general fucking area. Even if I get all the guys, who knows how long it’ll take to search those damned tunnels? Heather could only narrow it down so much.”

  Shay shook her head. “First of all, this shit isn’t your fault. It’s this He Who Hunts asshole and his lackeys. Second, I know how we can figure out his location very precisely.”

  James frowned. “What? Call Peyton in? What’s he gonna do that Heather hasn’t already?”

  She shook her head. “Nope. You keep forgetting that I happen to know a whole swarm of magical teenagers who know the tunnels of Los Angeles better than anyone. I guarantee that if I call Harry and feed him the information Heather gave you, we will know exactly where to go within hours.”

  “You think so?”

  Shay nodded. “I damned well know so. The only question is, what’s our next move once we know?”

  James grunted. “It’s time for me to stop fucking sitting around and do what I do best. I’ll get the guys together, and we’ll march down there and fucking waste every single Council sonofabitch we run into. We’ll find that He Who Hunts asshole and slice him into so many pieces, you’ll need a microscope to find one.” He slammed his fist on the counter. “These fuckers killed Shorty, and now they have the balls to come back? You make your call. I’m gonna call Trey and tell him to bring everyone in. Once we know where to go, we’ll march there, and I’ll show them why the Harriken and the Nuevo Gulf Cartel no longer exist.” He snorted. “And I don’t even have to break any promises to Alison.”

  “What promises?” Shay arched a brow.

  “I promised not to attack any buildings filled with bad guys without backup. Preferably you.” James shrugged.

  Shay grinned. “Aww, the family that slays together stays together.” She winked. “I’ll call Harry. Time to make ‘He Who Hunts’ into ‘He Who Cries Like a Little Bitch.’”

  Chapter Ten

  The heavy thud of dozens of men in boots echoed in the darkened tunnels, their head and wrist lamps cutting through the darkness. Every Brownstone Agency bounty hunter in the city had been called for the raid. They didn’t have time to wait for reinforcements from Vegas. Trey marched at the front of the bounty hunter formation but behind Shay and James.

  This was war, and again the men resembled soldiers more than bounty hunters in their helmets, dark tactical gear, and anti-magic deflectors. Style wasn’t necessary when they were on a mission of extermination.

  Many of them were grim-faced, undoubtedly thinking of their fallen friend. Most of them hadn’t been able to participate in any of James’ follow-up raids. It was their time to give a little payback.

  They’d finish off some sadistic bastards and pick up a paycheck from the government. It was about to be a very good day.

  Shay had been right. Harry and his friends had given her the location within an hour. One of them almost got zapped by a wizard and had barely managed to escape.

  James wasn’t worried about the Council forces fleeing. Harry and his friends were watching the outer perimeter, and they hadn’t seen anything except when they’d gotten too close.

  Whispy Doom radiated excitement in James’ mind, offering only the occasional murmur about killing the enemy. The damned thing wouldn’t shut up when he was sitting around but could be as a quiet as an altar boy in church if it knew James was on the way to destroy people.

  The bounty hunters murmured amongst themselves.

  Shay walked alongside James. “These Council guys are kind of fucking morons.”

  James grunted. “Why do you say that?”

  “It was one thing when we were hitting them at their base or one of their safehouses, but they’ve come onto your turf.” She shrugged. “And they only have one true Council member left.”

  “The Harriken didn’t know when to stop either.” James frowned. “The only problem is, I can’t blow up all those tunnels like I did their headquarters.”

  Shay laughed. “You don’t always have to blow everything up.”

  He shrugged. “When I did it to the Harriken, they stopped coming back. Didn’t do it to the Council, and I still have to deal with them.”

  “A good point. Next time we bring a bomb.” Shay patted the hilt of her sword. “Would you have gotten involved if they’d never kidnapped me?”

  James furrowed his brow and thought that over for a moment. “Don’t know. Lot of good money in level-six bounties.”

  “Not that you need it.” She grinned.

  “I have a feeling the fuckers would have pissed me off sooner or later.” James shrugged and turned his head to call to his men, “Two more rights and we should run right into them. Remember, this is still an official dead-or-alive organizational bounty. If they don’t immediately surrender, fucking waste them.”

  The gathered men nodded.

  Trey turned to the others. “Go ahead and load your anti-magic bullets. We know these bitches are mostly gonna be wizards.” He pulled a magazine out of his tactical vest and slapped it into his rifle. “And remember—this is for Shorty.”

  “For Shorty!” the men shouted in unison.

  Shay sighed and shook her head. “So much for the element of surprise.”

  James grunted. “Fuck surprise. I want those bitches to know we’re coming.”

  Insufficient power for advanced transformation, his amulet whispered.

  We don’t need that shit yet.

  Tactical potential not reached. Consider implications of allied forces.

  James glanced down at his covered chest. That wasn’t a line Whispy Doom had used before. Was the amulet trying to convince him a different way?

  It didn’t matter. He didn’t know what the situation was supposed to be, but for now, he was the one who called the shots, and Whispy Doom could fucking deal.

  “Let’s do this shit,” James shouted and broke into a sprint.

  The men rushed after him, their rifles ready. When they hit the first intersection, light shone from down the tunnel.

  Makes sense. Not like wizards can see in the dark automatically.

  James picked up the pace. At this point, he doubted the Council could throw anything at him his amulet hadn’t already encountered. He turned at the next intersection.

  A line of wizards flanked by strange monsters waited, their wands up. A man with rock skin stood to the side. At least nine other men looked identical except for different-colored glowing eyes. A giant spider with the head of a man crouched in the back. A human torso was connected to four pointed legs and a long serpentine tail. A few other nightmarish creatures stood ready.

  What the fuck is all this?

  New enemies, Whispy Doom sent. Kill enemies. Adapt. Grow stronger.

  James didn’t have more than a few seconds to ponder the unholy horrors standing in front of him before the wizards opened fire, a volley of elemental forces exploding around him. He gritted his teeth and stumbled back, the combined blast stinging more than he’d expected.

  Near maximum adaptation potential presented. Kill enemies. Find new, stronger enemies. Adapt.

  Shay and the men behind him held their breaths, waiting for the smoke and dust to clear. Even the Council forces watched in breathless silence. Everyone seemed to realize the true threat in the area.

  James smirked and wiped a small trickle of blood off his face. He had a few minor cuts and reddened skin. His clothes were shredded, his shirt almost gone, but he didn’t care anymore if anyone saw the amulet. Even if they didn’t need to know he was an alien, he had no problem with them knowing he had a special artifact he used during jobs. Like most people, they would just assume it was m
agical.

  He advanced and shrugged. “You get one fucking chance. Drop to your knees right now, or we end you fuckers.” He looked around with a frown. “And where the fuck is He Who Hunts?”

  The wizards responded with another blinding barrage. Stone, dirt, concrete, and metal blasted in the air, raining down in the chamber.

  James opened fire at the closest wizard, his anti-magic bullets cutting through the man’s second-rate shield. The guy jerked and spun, doing a final dance of death.

  The Brownstone men all opened fire now, as did Shay. Half of the wizards and glowing-eyed clones lay on the ground dead or dying before the Council troops realized their mistake in concentrating on James and believing their defenses would protect them from small-arms fire.

  The remaining wizards hurriedly backed up while the mutants and monsters advanced. The anti-magic bullets bounced off the rock-skinned man with a spark, and he grinned and charged.

  James grunted and holstered his pistol as he rushed the man. They slammed into each other, the loud thud booming like a thunderclap in the tunnel. The rock man’s eyes widened, and he staggered back from the force of the blow. The bounty hunter grunted, barely feeling the impact.

  He cracked his knuckles. “You can ask my girlfriend how hard a head I have, asshole.” He threw another punch and slammed a fist into the rock man, whose head snapped back.

  James shook out his hand. The man didn’t just look like a rock, he felt like one. If he hadn’t been using Whispy Doom, he might have broken his hand.

  The two exchanged blows, but it was obvious that despite the rock man’s magical armor, he lacked the bounty hunter’s natural strength. Punch after punch sent the mutant stumbling back, cracks appearing in his face and chest and pieces of rock flying off him.

  Kill enemy and find stronger enemy, Whispy Doom demanded. Current enemy defensive abilities insufficient to promote additional adaptation.

  The loud echoes of gunfire continued as the Brownstone army downed wizards and monsters. A fireball exploded near the line, and several men yelled out in pain. A blue ray blasted from one wizard’s wand, nailing Max in the shoulder. The bounty hunter fell to the ground, grimacing in pain, his anti-magic deflector dark but still intact.