by Tina Saxon
“Speaking of them being here, did you let them in?” I ask, just now remembering I never buzzed them up.
“Yes, but don’t be mad,” she adds quickly. “I just thought you’d want to see Frankie. And I was being really nosy wanting to see Travis in real life.” She bites her lip, waiting for my response.
“It’s okay,” I say, bumping her with my hip as we walk. “It was good seeing them both.”
“Excuse me.”
Syd and I both stop walking and turn to the voice behind us. There is a woman a little shorter than me with long, dark brown hair and beautiful emerald green eyes. I tilt my head while appraising the woman, definitely not missing the uncanny similarities to Aiden. They both have a strong jaw line, although hers definitely looks feminine.
“Are you Addison?” she asks, fiddling with her purse strap. She’s wearing black slacks, black boots, and a pink sweater. She’s as beautiful as Aiden is gorgeous.
I nod. “And I’m assuming you’re Katie?”
“How did you …” she stops when she looks at my face. “Oh, well, I guess we do look a lot alike.” She flips her hand out and an awkward laugh escapes her lips. I can tell she’s nervous.
I glance around to see if there is anyone else with her. I’m not sure who I expect but a little flicker of hope is that I’ll see Aiden standing somewhere close by. He’s not here. I look back at her. “What brings you to New York?” I ask.
I’m having another déjà vu moment right now. It seems everyone is visiting New York today. And me.
“I was here visiting … a friend,” she answers.
I look at Sydney. “What is with all the vague answers today?” She laughs while Katie’s eyebrows furrow, obviously confused. I’m not sure why she feels like she needs to lie. She could have just said she was here on business, and I wouldn’t have thought twice about it. But now I am. Is Aiden back? No. I’m certain Max or Damon would’ve told me.
“Katie, this is my best friend, Sydney,” I say, looking between the two.
“Aiden’s mentioned you,” she says as she shakes Syd’s hand. My heart patters. Did he mention her recently? Maybe he is back. I narrow my eyes at her.
“Is Aiden back?” I ask.
“Oh. No,” she says, sighing when she sees my lips turn down. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to think I’ve talked to him recently. I haven’t talked with him for a few months.”
“That’s okay. I was just wondering,” I say. I don’t want to let this connection go, though, not yet. “We were headed to lunch. Would you like to join us?” I offer.
“Are you sure?” she asks, looking at Syd and then back to me. “I don’t want to intrude.”
Syd smiles at her. “I don’t mind. I’m kinda tired of being with her all the time by myself,” she says, giggling.
“Hmph … I love you, too,” I huff, wrinkling my nose.
Syd laughs again, wrapping her arm around me. “I love you lots and lots,” she says, looking up at me with puppy dog eyes. I roll my eyes at her dramatic flair. Even if I wanted, I could never stay mad at her.
Katie agrees to go to lunch with us. We’re walking down the street, passing Bella Mistero, when Marco comes rushing out of his restaurant.
“Addison!” he boasts. He walks up to me with his arms stretched wide and wraps them around me. I feel a little irritated because he takes away my control by not waiting to see if I even want a hug.
It’s okay, it’s just Marco. I tell myself. He’s always been a hugger. He’s not going to harm me. I take a deep inhale and blow it out slowly. Sydney saves me, pulling me out of his embrace and saying it’s her turn, then gives him a hug. When our eyes meet, hers bore into me.
He pulls back quickly, looking back to me. “Please come in and have lunch, ladies. I have a new dish I need to test out,” he says, smiling wide at us. He’s always been a happy guy, but he seems a little over the top right now.
Syd glances my way, her eyes wide. “Thanks, Marco, but we were going—”
“Nonsense,” he says interrupting me. “I promise that you will have an amazing lunch with wine or anything you want, beautiful.” He opens his door, ushering us in. Syd is still staring at me, throwing fire with her eyes. I shrug. What am I supposed to do? Katie walks in behind Syd, not having a clue as to what is going on.
We’re seated out on the terrace. The sun is out in full force, but the cool spring breeze keeps it perfect. I close my eyes and take a deep breath of the fresh air. It feels rejuvenating. Things that I took for granted before, like fresh air or the feel of the sun’s warmth, I now covet.
“Are you okay?” Syd asks, sitting across from me. I keep my eyes closed and nod. I just need a moment for a time out. I’ve learned to meditate, especially right after situations that I feel uncomfortable. Marco’s hug is definitely one of those times. And it’s not really him; it’s me and my levels of comfort right now with men.
“Addie, we don’t need to stay. I can make up an excuse for us to leave,” Syd says as she squeezes my hand on top of the table.
I open my eyes and sigh loudly. “No, I’m okay. I can’t keep running and hiding when I feel anxious. Marco is harmless.” I look to Katie, wondering if I’ve made it uncomfortable for her. Instead, her eyes crinkle with a warm smile.
Lunch ends up being amazing, which doesn’t surprise me. The food here is always getting rave reviews from foodies. Our conversation is light with lots of laughs and flows throughout lunch. I feel relaxed and really like Katie by the time we finish with lunch. She doesn’t bring up Aiden, which surprises me. I thought that was the whole reason she wanted to find me. She admits she was here for a man but doesn’t disclose any other information, and we tried to pry it out of her. I’m not exactly sure why, but I get the feeling she’s hiding something from Aiden. She tells me that she’s wanted to meet me for a while now, but for obvious reasons hasn’t. Since she’s in town, she said she thought she would look me up. I’m so glad she did.
As we get up to leave, Marco comes to our table. This time when he moves forward to hug me, I step back. “I’m sorry, Marco,” I say holding up my hand. The hurt in his eyes makes me second-guess my decision. Don’t be a bitch. The man just gave us an incredible meal, on the house, and this is how I treat him. “I just …” I pause trying to gather my thoughts. “I’m just not ready for a lot of touching,” I explain the best I can.
“Beautiful, I understand,” he says softly. His body language says something different though. His posture is stiff, and I notice the flex of his muscles. I tilt my head, watching him briefly, before Syd takes it upon herself to say our goodbyes. As we’re leaving, I glance back at Marco and offer an apologetic smile. He scowls until he realizes that I’m looking at him. His expression instantly changes to a smile, and he waves goodbye. Shit, I hope I didn’t make him mad. He’s always been so nice to me, I should really come back later and apologize. Without Sydney.
Katie tells us she has to go to make her flight. I give her a hug. “Thank you so much for finding me. I loved meeting you,” I say.
Her hug tightens around me before she pulls back. “If you ever need to talk to someone who knows how you’re feeling, please call me,” she says softly. I’m taken aback by what she says. Her lips curl up slightly and she nods. “They tell you to go to group sessions, but I always found those depressing.”
Oh, my God. Katie was raped? Does Aiden know? Does Max know? So many questions run through my head.
“He doesn’t know,” she says quietly, looking away. “He’s already an overprotective brother. It would have just made things a lot worse. But really, if you need to talk, I’m here to listen.”
I hug her again. “Thank you.”
We hail a cab for her and wave as she leaves. “I like her,” Sydney says, leaning into me. I nod. Me, too. “Who I don’t like is Marco.” She pulls me down the street. I sigh loudly. “Addison, why can’t you see it?”
I shrug. “See what? He’s just a concerned friend. He’s been n
othing but nice to me.”
“He hovered the whole lunch. More so this time than in the past. And that hug in the beginning. Anyone could see how uncomfortable you were, but he just hugs you tighter,” Syd exclaims.
I shake my head. She’s being overly dramatic. All I know is today was a good day. I felt normal. A step in the right direction. Maybe time is just moving slower for me, but it’s definitely moving.
“I’ll call you when I’m done running, Syd,” I say into the phone, holding it between my shoulder and my ear while I tie my shoe. We hang up and I put my cell phone and gun into a special running belt under my shirt. I double-check that they are both in there snug before heading out to Central Park. The constant feeling that someone is following me has slowly subsided, but I feel more at ease knowing I have my gun.
The air is crisp this spring morning. I’d gotten used to the sticky, spring air in Texas; I’d already be sweating just stretching. As I sit on the grass and stretch my legs, I watch people run past me, lost in their own world. Do they know how lucky they are to be able to do that? Will I ever feel that safe again? Have I ever truly felt that sense of security? I reflect on my life, and I think the last time I felt that way was right before my mom was murdered.
I glance around one last time before sticking one earbud in my ear and turning on my music. I push off the ground and wait until a couple runners pass before jogging behind them. Selena Gomez’s “It Ain’t Me” blares into one ear. I find the rhythm and my feet fall into pace with it. Working with Tony again has improved my endurance running stamina. Running a marathon has crossed my mind. For a quick second. I’m not sure I would enjoy running for that long. I start out my run around the reservoir. The view is unbelievable. I’ve missed the magnificent skyline of Manhattan, but the best part of the view is the blooming cherry blossom trees. They are like puffs of cotton candy against the blue sky. Running along the east side of the reservoir, tiny pink and white petals dust the trail. For a few moments I feel like a princess from a fairy tale, running under the light shower of petals. I always laugh to myself, thinking a squirrel is going to come out and be able to talk to me. Then I pass the pretty trees and I’m back to reality.
I hum the tune of the song as I run along the path. I’m back to my starting point so I know I’ve gone a little over a mile and a half. I usually veer off and take a different path through wooded areas, but something inside of me tells me to stay on this path. I pull out my earbud and strain to listen to everything around me. I keep my pace, but the feeling of someone following me makes me uneasy. I shake my head and roll my eyes. Of course someone is following me. I mean, I’m on a freaking jogging path; there are probably a hundred people behind me. I take a deep breath, trying to calm my irrational nerves.
I put my earbud in again, hoping I can drown the feelings I’m having with music and get back into a groove. It doesn’t work. Instead, there are heavy footsteps behind me that drown out everything else. It’s all I hear. Even my heartbeat matches the vibrations of the steps. I don’t know if I’m imagining the increase of both or if I’m going crazy. There are a lot of people out here; nothing is going to happen to me. Reaching under my shirt, I run my thumb along my gun to make sure it’s still there. I know I’m being ridiculous as my blood simmers with anxiety.
I tell myself to pull off to the side, but my body is afraid of what might happen if I stop moving. I glance at the bench coming up and decide I’m stopping. I sit at the last second before passing it and a tall man plops right down next to me so close we’re almost touching, causing me to scream and jump up.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Marco says, standing up. I grab my frantic heart, beating so fast that I think I might pass out. “Here, sit down.” He guides me back to the bench and helps me sit. I take in deep breaths, blowing them out slowly.
When I’m able to talk, I look at Marco sitting next to me. “Holy shit, you scared me.” My eyes dart over his body, relieved to see that he’s wearing basketball shorts and a sweat-covered shirt. He’s running, just like me. Just like the hundreds of other people here. I cover my eyes with my hand to hide my embarrassment. “I’m sorry,” I say with my head down.
Marco’s hand rubs my back. “It’s okay, beautiful. Nothing to be ashamed of.”
My back straightens from the unexpected feel of his hand. Standing up quickly, I look down at him. “So, do you run here often?” I quickly blurt out. Marco chuckles. I close my eyes and sigh. Good one, Addison. Way to defuse the situation. Maybe next I can ask him if he has a map, because I keep getting lost in his eyes.
Marco sits back, laying his hand across the park bench, and his gaze moves up and down my body. His apparent gawking has me ready to turn and leave. “I come here sometimes,” he replies slowly when his eyes move back up and meet mine.
“How long were you behind me?” I ask, tilting my head, wishing he’d stop checking me out.
“Not long. As soon as I started, I saw you up ahead and I figured I’d catch up with you. But you’re faster than I thought,” he says as he runs his fingers through his wet hair, smiling wide. How the heck did he know it was me from behind? Is my ass that recognizable? Especially in the sea of people out this morning? I twist my lips and think about that for a couple seconds. Aiden swears he could pick out my ass anywhere…
“Well, it seems you’ve caught me on the tail end of my run,” I say, trying to sound sincere. I had planned on running another couple miles, but given the company, I’m not feeling it anymore. Marco rubs his bottom lip with his fingers, staring at me. I rock back and forth on my feet under his assessing eyes. When he stands up, he steps right in front of me.
“Beautiful Addison, go on a date with me,” he says. My eyes go wide in surprise. That’s the last thing I expected him to say. Although, I’m not sure why I’m surprised. He’s made it very clear that he likes me, but he’s never acted on it.
“Oh,” I say when he looks at me expectantly. “Um, Marco, you’re a great guy … but Aiden and I are still figuring things out.” It’s not a total lie. I manage a soft smile at the awkward moment. His eyes turn hard and he spins around. He takes a few steps and then whips around again. I wrap my arms around my waist when his eyes bore into mine.
“You are such a tease, Addison.”
“I’m sorry. What did you say?” I ask defensively. Talk about a one-eighty about face. I don’t know what the hell just happened with his attitude, but that was uncalled for. I have never given him any indication that I was interested in him.
“You know you want me. I can see it in your eyes every time you see me. Why don’t you just give me a chance?” His arms go out wide, like he’s waiting for me to run into them. My mouth gapes open as my head jerks back a bit. You know you want me? Oh, yeah, that’s a great way to get a girl to go out with you.
I take a couple seconds to pull myself together. I open my mouth and then slam it shut. Not quite ready. When I am, I try again. “Marco, I’ve been with Aiden almost the entire time we’ve known each other, so what have I ever done to tease you? I’ve always been nice to you because I thought we were friends. But that’s it.”
He takes a step toward me, and I hold up a hand stopping him from getting any closer. He looks down at my hand and a shadow falls over his face. He blinks a couple times, his temper erasing from his features. I narrow my eyes at him, watching him closely. He backs up. “Well, I feel like an idiot now. I’m sorry, Addison. I must have misread the situation.” He tries to sound apologetic but it comes out hollow.
I nod slowly. I don’t know what else to say. I frown and sigh. “I don’t want to give you the wrong idea again, so maybe it’s best if I stay away from the restaurant and if we pass each other on the street, a friendly ‘hi’ will suffice,” I resign.
“No, beautiful,” he begs as he reaches forward. I step back again and wince at the name and wonder why he’s still using it when five seconds ago he looked at me with pure hatred. “I know now you can’t go out with me
because of Aiden.” I could easily add that isn’t the only reason, especially now, but I keep that to myself. I look around at the joggers running past us. I catch the eyes of a few of them and flash a soft smile as they go by.
“Well, I need to go,” I say, pointing my thumb behind me in the direction I should be heading. “I’m sure I’ll see you around.” He nods his head and sits back on the bench. Is he going to watch me walk away? Well this is about the most uncomfortable goodbye I’ve ever had. I wave and then turn around. I don’t think I’ve ever tried this hard to not sway my hips. I know if I turn around, he’ll be watching me. To prove to myself that I’m right, I glance back after a few minutes. He’s still on the bench and his smile reaches his eyes when our gazes meet. Fuck!
“Addison,” CJ sighs. “We got another one.” I look up from my computer. My head tilts to the side.
“Another one?”
“Another family was murdered last night. I need you and Harper out there…” CJ pauses, “…unless you think you need to sit this one out.”
“The cereal killer?” CJ nods. We need to find this guy. The media gave him the name ‘cereal killer’ because he always leaves a bowl of uneaten cereal as his calling card. How stupid is that? It pisses me off even more that someone leaked that information. Can’t people keep their damn mouths shut? Now we have to worry about copycats.
“No, I can do it,” I reply, my voice flat.
Harper walks into my office, twirling the van keys around her finger. “Ready to go get this guy?”
“More than you know,” I say, putting on my vest and badge. My motivation for finding this guy has my body heating up in anger just thinking about it. Things like this didn’t bother me before, but knowing that he always rapes the wife before killing her has me feeling uneasy.