Merciless

by Sybil Bartel

  Heat hit my cheeks and I froze. “That was fast.” Usually Mav took a bit longer to fall asleep.

  “He was tired.” His gaze drifted down my body, then came back up to my eyes. “Come here.”

  His injured arm in his lap, his other across the back of the couch, he had one ankle resting on the opposite knee. T-shirt and shorts, bare feet, he seemed like he should look casual, but Garrett Collins was never casual. He always looked… ready. Ready to spring into action, ready to take down a bad guy, ready to fight, ready to defend. After seeing him with a gun that night three weeks ago when he’d come for me and Mav, I understood something about him. Garrett was a Marine first and a man second.

  Casual wasn’t in his vocabulary.

  And that thought alone was what had my heart racing as I closed the distance between us and walked to the couch.

  He nodded at the seat beside him.

  I sat.

  His chest rose with an inhale. “When were you going to tell me?”

  My stomach dropped and a lump formed in my throat. I didn’t have to ask what he meant. The estate. “Who told you?”

  His expression impenetrable, he studied me a moment. “Does it matter?”

  Oh God. “Have you heard from the ATF agent?” Did he come up with something against me?

  His jaw ticked. “Are you moving back in there? To his estate?”

  I stilled.

  Then I got it.

  “I didn’t tell you because that house means nothing to me. Regardless if the Feds confiscate it, or whatever they do with seized property, even if that doesn’t happen, I don’t want it. I’m never going back there. I don’t want any part of Nathan in my life ever again, including any of the money he had.”

  “No one walks away from fifteen million.”

  How did I explain that there wasn’t any money in my eyes? “That’s not my money, it never was, and every single dollar used to buy the property has tethers on it. I want no part of it.”

  “You’re not just throwing money away if you turn your back on that, you’re walking away from securing a future for Mav.”

  “A future based on laundered drug money?” Was he serious? “So he can have a target on his back his whole life? For what? Greed?” Insulted, I stood. “Is that so important to you, that you’d take illegal money and give it to our son?” My voice pitched higher with every word. “You think you need that kind of money to have a good life? You think any amount of money can replace love or family?”

  The more I said, the more upset I got. Had everything these past few weeks been a sham? Angry, upset, irrational—words flew out of my mouth before I could censor them. “Isn’t it enough to have a healthy, happy son and a woman who loves you? You need fifteen million too? Is that what makes you tick? Money?” I no sooner spit the last word out than he was on his feet.

  His mouth crashed over mine, and he grabbed me with one arm.

  I gasped, and his tongue plunged into my mouth.

  Then three weeks of smelling his spicy scent and three years of celibacy reared up and hit me. My hands tangled in his hair, my hips pressed into his, and I kissed him back. Oh my God, I kissed him back.

  His good arm went under my ass and he lifted me up.

  A groan crawled up my throat, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His hard length pressed into my aching core, and my lips ripped from his. “Garrett.” My back arched, and I let out a sound of need I’d never heard myself make.

  “Fuck, woman.” Holding me one handed, his other arm loose at his side, he walked us into his room and stopped in front of his bed. “Legs down,” he ordered.

  Sliding down his body, my feet hit the carpet and I went on tiptoe to kiss him again.

  Grabbing a handful of my hair, he pulled hard. “Step back,” he growled, dropping his hand.

  Panting, my core pulsing, my mouth watering, I did exactly as he said. I stepped back.

  He pulled his shirt over his head.

  My nipples hard, my body trembling to touch him, I dragged my gaze across his healing gunshot wounds and huge biceps, over his washboard abs and down to the V I knew was under his clothes. Then my gaze dropped lower, and I sucked in a breath. Impossibly huge, his desire strained against his shorts, and all I could think about was one thing.

  I wanted my mouth on him.

  Dropping to my knees, I reached for his shorts, and a breath hissed through his teeth.

  His arms at his sides, his eyes hooded, he didn’t stop me.

  My fingers curled under the waistband of both his shorts and boxers, and I pulled them down. His cock sprang free, and I didn’t hesitate. I put my mouth on him.

  His masculine scent, spice and musk, filled my head as I took him all the way into my mouth.

  I moaned and he growled.

  Sucking him, tonguing him, I grasped him with both hands. His hips jerked and his cock pulsed as his hand buried in my hair.

  I sucked the length of him.

  My mouth stretched like I wanted my pussy to be stretched, and desire pooled between my legs. Twisting my hands, using my tongue, I took him deep.

  Shuddering, his hand tightened in my hair, and he pulled. “Get up.” All growl, his voice cracked on the last word of his demand.

  I smiled around his cock in my mouth and looked up at him.

  Expression fierce, his jaw set, he repeated himself. “Get. Up.”

  I stood.

  But I didn’t stop there.

  I pulled my tank top over my head.

  JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, HER MOUTH on my cock?

  Fuuuuck. FUCK.

  I wanted to grip her hair and fuck her mouth and come down her throat. I wanted to watch my seed drip from her lips and then I wanted to fill her pussy over and over, in every position imaginable. But I had a bum fucking shoulder right now and I wasn’t going to do that to her after she’d waited so goddamn long.

  “Three years?” Losing my restraint, I barked out the question.

  She dropped her shirt, but she folded her arms across her full breasts. “What?”

  “Don’t hide from me,” I ordered, glancing at her arms before looking back into her gorgeous eyes. “You know exactly what I’m asking.” I wasn’t stupid enough to think she’d been waiting for me, but I wanted an explanation.

  Her chest rose with a deep breath. “I didn’t want anyone else.”

  I read between the lines. “You didn’t want him.” But that didn’t mean he hadn’t wanted her. “He ever force you?” Not that I could kill him again, but I needed to know what I was dealing with. I wouldn’t ever force shit on her.

  “No.” She shook her head. “He left me alone for the most part.”

  My hand fisted. “Most part?”

  Her bottom lip went between her teeth. “Yes. While I was pregnant, after Mav was….” She shook her head and cleared her throat. “After Mav was born. I stayed in the pool house, and he left me alone. Except the night you came and got us, he’d shown up earlier and tried something. It was the first time he’d done that in years.”

  My jaw ticked. “Something?”

  “I pushed him away, then one of his guards came in and he left. A while later you came for me.”

  Fighting to control my rage at Lewis, at myself for not getting to her sooner, I pulled at the thread she’d left unsaid about Mav’s birth. “What happened when Mav was born?”

  Her gaze dropped and her arms went back up. “Can we not do this?”

  Five words and it was as if a switch flipped. The rage and pounding desire coursing through my veins halted, and I realized what the fuck I was doing. Enraged at dead man, a man I’d killed, while she was standing in front of me living with every shit memory he gave her. I was a fucking tool. This wasn’t about me.

  Taking a breath to calm the fuck down, I cupped the back of her neck and brought my forehead to hers. Then I said what I should’ve said weeks ago.

  “For three weeks I’ve watched you take care of our son, take care of me. You cook, you cle
an, you smile, you’re so fucking patient, I didn’t know mothers could be like you. But you haven’t said one word about the past three years. I don’t know where Mav was born, I still don’t know how you got that scar on your wrist. I don’t know what the hell happened to you. You told me your past in the hospital that day, and I get it. I don’t need the details of your life with that asshole. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to know everything else. I want to know about you.” Goddamn it, I wanted to know her. “I want to know every dream you ever had. Every wish, hope, and fear. I want to know you.”

  “I’m afraid to say anything,” she whispered.

  Shit, she knew how to crush me. “Don’t be afraid of me, sweetheart.” I wasn’t gonna hurt her. Not like that asshole.

  “I had Mav in the pool house, on the bathroom floor,” she blurted, before words started spilling out of her mouth like a confession. “I went into labor, except I didn’t realize what was happening at first. Then he was coming so fast, and I was afraid to go to hospital, so I didn’t call for help.”

  Jesus fuck. “You gave birth by yourself?”

  She nodded, barely. “Nathan’s guard, Ty, heard me when I cried out in pain, and he came into the pool house, but I wouldn’t let him call for an ambulance. I was afraid of what Nathan would do if I went to the hospital. He… he’d made threats about taking Mav.”

  A new level of rage I didn’t know I was capable of washed over me. “I would’ve killed him then if he did.”

  “I was alone and afraid and I didn’t know what to do, but I knew I couldn’t let Mav out of my sight. Ty said he had a sister who was a nurse. He called her, but by the time she got to the estate, Mav was already born. She helped clean me and Mav up, and showed me how to nurse him and then she checked on me a few times. She brought me diapers and helped me get Mav’s birth certificate. But the fourth time she came by, Ty said Nathan saw her, and she never came back after that.”

  Jesus fucking Christ. “Where the fuck was Lewis while this was going on?”

  “He came to the pool house that first night Mav was born. He took one look at me holding him, and pivoted and walked back out. I didn’t see him for a month. Then he walked into the pool house on a Monday morning and told me to make my runs.”

  “Fuck, Brooke.” I didn’t know what to say. I could’ve prevented all of that, but saying so didn’t change shit, and I wasn’t going to rub it in her face. “Do I want to know about the scar?” I had my suspicions, but I was hoping like hell I was off base.

  Her arms still crossed over her chest, she pulled her hands in close. “He carved his initial on my wrist the first time I tried to leave.”

  My nostrils flared and my jaw locked. I counted to ten, reliving every fucking bullet I put in that motherfucker.

  “Please.” She reached for me. “I had to let it go.” She cupped the side of my face like I was the one who needed comforting. “I need you to let it go too. He’s gone and we’re here.”

  For five fucking breaths, I stared at her, not knowing how the fuck she forgave that asshole for that. “Three years ago, that wound was fresh.”

  No anger in her tone, she didn’t hesitate. “Yes, it was.”

  “You’re a survivor.” Giving birth on a bathroom floor by herself? Jesus fuck, she was tougher than most Marines I knew.

  Her hand gently traced over the healing wounds on my shoulder. “So are you.”

  I wasn’t a survivor. “I’m a Marine,” I corrected.

  A small smile lifted the corners of her mouth. “Once a Marine, always a Marine.”

  I kissed her.

  I gripped a handful of her hair, and I took her mouth like I wanted to take her sweet body. I knew without a doubt that I loved her. I loved every goddamn thing about her. “I want inside you.”

  “Oh God.” She shoved her leggings over her hips. “Yes, please.”

  The scent of her desire and naked body caused my mouth to water, and my cock to pulse, but I needed to get something off my chest. Holding the side of her face, gripping her hair, I stared into the eyes of the only women I’d ever dreamed about, and I gave her the truth. “I didn’t stray.”

  Every muscle in her body stilled. “What?”

  I brought my mouth almost to hers. “I haven’t touched another woman.” I gave her the words she gave me. “I didn’t want anyone else.”

  Her eyes welled. “But, you didn’t know if you would ever see me again.”

  “I looked for you for a year.”

  “Why?” Her voice caught.

  I took her hand and brought it to my chest. “Because you walked into my life and stole my fucking heart.”

  A tear slid down her cheek. “I’m so sorry, for everything.”

  “I know.” I saw it in her eyes, but those weren’t the words I was hoping to hear.

  “I don’t deserve you,” she whispered.

  Anger flared. Oh fuck no. “I’m not playing that game with you. You don’t get to stand in front of me thinking one of us is better. This isn’t obligation, duty, or pity. You don’t get to glorify what I am. You want to give yourself to me, you do it on equal footing. You tell me you want me.” Because that’s all I ever wanted from her.

  “I want you.”

  My chest constricted, but I didn’t let it go. “I’m not a hero,” I warned.

  “I want you,” she repeated.

  I stared at her.

  She dropped her voice. “I want you.”

  My restraint broke and my mouth was on hers. Pent-up shit unleashed and a roar ripped from my chest. Taking it and my merciless kiss, she wrapped an arm around my neck and pulled.

  We crashed onto the bed and she spread her legs wide.

  Her hands all over my arms and chest, her body trembling, her mouth on mine, she begged. “Please, please, please.” She reached for my cock. “I need you.”

  Holding myself above her with my good arm, I fisted myself with my other hand and dragged the head of my cock down the length of her already soaked pussy. “I wanna come inside you.” Fuck, I wanted to come in her.

  She thrust her hips and my head slid inside her. “Yes,” she moaned.

  Fuuuck. My eyes closed and my balls went tight, but I gripped my cock and didn’t let myself go any deeper. Focusing back on her, I barked words. “Last time we did this, we got Mav.”

  “He needs a brother.” She planted her feet and drove her hips up.

  My hand slid from my cock and I plunged inside her. “Jesus fuck, woman.” Sinking to the hilt, my weight landed on her and we both groaned.

  “Please,” she pleaded, rocking against me. “Make me come.”

  Tight and hot and more fucking perfect than I remembered, her pussy pulsed around me and I almost came. “Birth control,” I growled, incapable of saying shit else.

  “Not on it.”

  Goddamn it. I pulled out halfway. “Not having this conversation while we’re fucking.” If she wanted another kid from me, we were gonna have a hell of a lot longer conversation than this.

  “The timing’s off. I won’t get pregnant this time.” She spread her legs even wider. “Please, Garrett.” Her hands went to her breasts and she grasped her nipples. “Please.”

  I slammed into her.

  Then I was fucking her.

  Hard.

  My thumb on her clit, I pounded into her. Over and over, I buried my cock in her sweet pussy. I wasn’t thinking about the past three years, or my kid, or the last few weeks. I didn’t give a shit about her ex, the truck, or any of it.

  I was inside her and I was fucking home.

  Goddamn, I was home.

  “Oh my God.” Her back arched, her muscles went rigid and her pussy fucking detonated. Constricting around my cock, she cried out my name. “Garrett!”

  I fucking let go.

  Pulse after pulse, I came inside her.

  Then my mouth was on hers and I was kissing her. Everything I didn’t say to her, I showed her. Having her underneath me, filling her with my releas
e, I stroked through her sweet heat, and I gave her my fucking heart all over again.

  Her hands ran through my hair and she grasped just enough to pull.

  Our lips parted and I stared down at the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on. I didn’t say shit because I couldn’t.

  The corners of her mouth tipped up. “Again?”

  I couldn’t help it, I laughed. “Making up for lost time?”

  Her expression turned serious as her voice quieted. “Yeah.”

  “Me too.” I covered her mouth again and I kissed her long and slow, but this time I didn’t fuck her.

  I made love to her.

  Rolling to my back, spent, her scent all over me, I rubbed my hand over my face, and my shoulders shook once as a thought occurred to me and I quietly chuckled.

  “What?” she asked, panting beside me.

  “Fuck, woman.” Resigned, amused, disbelieving, I didn’t know what the fuck I was as I looked at her. “You actually kept my truck.”

  Her eyes went wide and she looked like a kid caught with her hand in the candy jar. “I’m sorry?”

  Jesus fucking Christ. I burst out laughing. “You have to ask that?”

  Pure and sweet, she smiled. “It’s a really nice truck.”

  I laughed harder. “You little fucking minx.” There’d been nothing pure and sweet about her for the past three hours.

  “Yes.” She grinned. “But it looked good on me.”

  My expression sobered. “It still does.” I was talking about more than the truck.

  Her smile dropped. “I wanted to hold on to the only piece of you I had,” she admitted.

  I cupped her cheek and I forgave her. “I’m not mad anymore.”

  Tears welled in her eyes. “Thank you.”

  I leaned over and brought my lips to hers. “Thank you for our son.”

  I COULDN’T TAKE MUCH MORE of this. She was wearing her bikini again, and fuck if her tits weren’t bigger than when I’d first met her. I wanted to take her again. Fuck, I wanted to lick every inch of her sweet body while I pounded into her from now until next year. I wanted to come inside her so many damn times, I lost my mind.