Pieces of Me

by Pua Ramona

  “If you had a choice, would you want to move back home? I’d love nothing more than having all my kids living close to me, but you have your own life now. Have you and Eli talked about you going back to New York?” She asks.

  Inhale. Exhale. “We’ve just been so busy that we haven’t talked about anything. He hasn’t asked us to stay, and I don’t want to come off desperate by forcing him to make a decision.” I sigh.

  “If he asked you to stay, would you?” Mama says.

  “I would Mama. I love him, he’s the missing piece of me.” I confess to her.

  Mama kisses the top of my head. “And you’re the missing piece of him. The Hunters have been a huge blessing to us, I don’t know where I’d be if Eliza wasn’t by my side. She’s become my best friend, and Eli’s like one of my own. He is the only man that I trust to protect you and Emma, especially with your heart.” She says smiling. “Do you have anything that’s waiting for you in New York?”

  I shake my head. “No.”

  “Do you think you can stay for another week?” She enquires.

  I look at Mama. “I guess we can stay for another week.” I tell her, shrugging my shoulders.

  Mama looks at me. “How are you Sina, with everything that happened?”

  I rest my head back on her shoulder and sigh. “I’m okay. I know you’re worried, but I promise that I’m okay. Everything that has happened makes me realize that life is short and that I needed to live because I am alive. I had two choices. I was either going to let my past break me, or I push through everything that was breaking me. And I chose to push for myself and everyone that I love. I’m just sad that our family is going through all this hurt Mama.”

  She tucks a piece of my loose hair behind my ear. “And that isn’t your fault. I’m sad for your Auntie Lupe and Uncle Niko, this is on Jackson and no one else. And I know you’re hurting because you haven’t heard from June-Bug, but it was his brother who hurt you and Eli. So he has to deal with it the way he knows how. If that means he feels he has to stay away from us, then we have to respect it.” She wipes the tear off my cheek. “Your father would’ve been so proud of you Sina for not giving up. I’m so proud of you sweetie, so damn proud. I love you Sina.” She says and pulls me in for a hug.

  “I love you too Mama. And thank you for never giving up on me.” I tell her quietly.

  “Well, I’m going to go have some of your Auntie Claire’s half-moon pie before your brothers finish it. Are you going to stay out here for a bit longer?’ She asks.

  I smile, “Yeah, I’ll be inside in a little bit.”

  “Enjoy the peace and quiet sweetie.” She says as she gets up to go back into the house. Inhale. Exhale. Peace and quiet.

  “Hey gorgeous!”

  “Rino.” I laugh under my breath.

  “How are you?” he asks.

  I shrug. “Tired. But I’m good.” I move a little so he can sit down.

  “I wanted to come say goodbye before I fly back to New York in a couple of days and I wasn’t sure if I’d see you again before I left. Walk with me?” I take his hand and we get up together to walk around the yard.

  “Do you need a ride to the airport? Because I can take you Rino.” I offer and he stops walking. I’m not ready to say goodbye, but I know he has a life to get back to.

  “Sina, can you look at me? Please?” I shake my head no but he gently holds my chin and moves my face so he can see me. “Stop crying. How is it possible that you still have tears in those pretty eyes? No more crying.” I try to laugh, but it sounds more like I’m just ugly crying at him instead.. “If things were different I would take you back with me, but I would have to be blind to not see how you and Eli were meant to be together. He makes you happy, right?” he asks.

  I nod my head. “Yes, he does. So much Rino.”

  He smiles and says, “Then your life is here with him and your family. I know New York’s been your home for a long time, but you belong here.” Stupid tears batter my cheeks again.

  “But, he hasn’t asked me to stay.” I say quietly.

  He chuckles, “Then ask him where you stand. Don’t waste anymore time. And if he makes you cry again, you call me and I’ll be back to beat his ass, gunshot wounded or not.”

  I laugh with a mix of tears and snot running down my face. Attractive.

  He kisses my forehead and I sob, “Thank you Rino.”

  “I know he’ll love you right, so I’m not worried. I’ll text you when I get back to New York. Love you Sina”, and he walks back to his car before getting in and driving away.

  I take a deep breath and head back to the house. “He’s in love with you.” I hear Eli say from my side.

  “I know. But I’m in love with you” I reply looking up at him.

  “I know,” he says and I sigh. I am crazy about him. He grabs my hand then he sits me on his lap.

  “God, you smell so good,” he says.

  “Stop sniffing me, that’s weird. And my name’s Sina, not God.”

  He pokes my side. “Smartass” he says. I chuckle. He kisses my neck. “Can I ask you something?”

  I nod. “Sure you can.”

  He kisses the side of my head. “Do you remember seeing me at the lake eight years ago?” he asks.

  “Yes. You were either running laps around the lake, or you were leaving when I saw you.”

  He winds his arms around me tighter. “Was that the same night everything happened?” I nod my head yes. He hugs me hard “I’m sorry I left you there,” he says.

  I turn so I can get a good look at his face and I kiss the corner of his mouth. “You didn’t know and it wasn’t your fault.” I can feel his heart beating faster. “What were you doing there so late that night?” I ask him.

  “I had a fight with my dad that night about something stupid, so I went to the lake to get away from the noise,” he says.

  “Is that the reason why you were so mean when I came back a few months ago?” I ask.

  “ It’s part of it,” he says. “When I was in college, I was in a serious relationship with my college sweetheart. Her name was Chrissy.”

  I think I’m a little jealous.“Bad breakup?” I ask.

  “No, she committed suicide.” He says shaking his head and I feel like such an asshole. I don’t say anything so he continues. “She was pregnant with my baby. At first she was having a hard time accepting it, but she started getting used to the whole baby thing. I thought things were good, but then one day I came home from working a long shift. I didn’t want to work it, but we needed the extra money because we were having a baby.” He takes a deep breath. “I found her in our bed, dead. She overdosed.”

  I hold him close. “Oh my god, I am so sorry.”

  He hugs me tighter. “Thank you babe.”

  “Is that the reason why you were so mean?” I say as I cling to him trying to hold his broken pieces together.

  “Yeah. I told myself that I wasn’t going to get involved or fall in love with anyone else because it was a waste of time. Until you. You made me feel things that Chrissy never made me feel ever, not even Becca.” He says, nodding into my shoulder as I don't break our embrace.

  “Are you still in love with her?” I know I shouldn’t ask, but I need to know.

  “I loved Chrissy, but I was never in love with her.” He says truthfully.

  I look away. “ And did you love Becca?”

  “I liked her, nothing more.” He moves my face close to his. “You’re the only woman that’s ever made me stupid like this. I was an asshole and I am sorry. I just didn’t know how to deal with my feelings.”

  “How do you feel now?” I ask.

  He has this goofy smile on his beautiful face. “Now I have you and I’m in love with you.” He kisses my lips. “And you’re the only one for me Sina.” He kisses me again. “I love you,” he says. I love kissing him. Sigh.

  “I love you more.” I say.

  “Are you ready to go home?” he asks. Home. Yes, he is my home.
<
br />   “Take me home.” I say, getting up and holding his hand as he follows me inside the house.

  “Hey Mama? We’re going to get ready and head back to the house. Emma, are you ready?” I call out and she comes flying down the stairs.

  “Woah there speedy '' Eli says catching her.

  Emma giggles. “Eli, can I spend the night with Grandma pleeeeease?”

  Eli looks at me asking with his eyes if I’m okay with that. “If you promise to not run down those stairs anymore then I don’t see why not sweetheart” he says.

  Emma throws her arms around him. “I promise.” She says and he picks her up then kisses her on her forehead.

  “Love you Eli.” She tells him.

  “Love you too.” He sets her back down then she quickly walks back upstairs.

  “What am I? Chopped liver?” I call after her.

  She giggles. “I love you Mama.” Then she blows me a kiss.

  “Night baby.” Eli grabs our to-go plates, because we both know how I love leftovers for breakfast.

  “Alright, let me know when you guys get home” Mama says.

  “Will do,” I hug her goodbye. “Love you Mama.”

  “Night Mama Rita.”

  Chapter Sixty-Nine

  Eli

  The drive home is quiet but comfortable. Emma decided she would stay the night at her grandma’s which was fine with us. And it means a lot to me that Sina’s letting me be a part of Emma’s life. It makes me love her that much more. I hear her yawning. “Tired babe?” I ask as she reaches for my hand. Fuck, I love her.

  “Yeah, just a little tired,” she says as I kiss her hand.

  “Do we have anything planned for tomorrow?” I ask her.

  My baby yawns again. “I was planning on sleeping in tomorrow since Emma’s with Mama”, she says.

  “How about we do this. When we get home you go take a quick shower, I’ll grab us some snacks then we’ll pig out until we either pass out or throw up?” She giggles and her laugh fucking kills me every time.

  “You’re spoiling me love” she says.

  “I plan on spoiling you forever.” I tell her and she sighs. I have to figure out a way to keep her from going back to New York. By the time we pull into the garage, she’s already falling asleep. I trail my fingers down her face. “Baby, we’re home.” She smiles and my heart aches in a good way. She opens her eyes. “Hey.” She blinks a couple of times.

  “Hey you” she says.

  “Go take your shower, and we’ll watch one of those corny hallmark movies that you love.” I tease.

  She pinches my arm. “Hallmark is not corny. Stop being so judgmental” she says. Fuck, she’s the cutest.

  “Hallmark’s for people who are hopeless romantics,” I say and she smiles and my fucking heart flips.

  “And I’m one of those people'' she says. She winks at me as she gets out. I follow her inside, snaking my arm around her waist and moving her hair out of the way so I can start kissing her neck.

  “Mm. I’ll never be able to take a shower if you don’t stop doing that , she moans.

  I nibble at her ear. “You make me crazy Babe.” I tell her as turns around and wraps her arms around my neck. Her lips are on mine and she starts sucking on my tongue then bites my lower lip. Fuck. But she doesn’t stop. “Babe, if you don’t stop doing that, I’m going to bend you over this counter and fuck you good” I growl in her ear.

  She moves her beautiful mouth to my ear and says “No you won’t.” She sucks on my lobe, and my fucking dick is hard as a rock. “Because you would rather make love to me than fuck me hard on a counter” she whispers and her lips crash into mine. “I’m going to go take a shower now before I change my mind.” She says before she fucking rubs on me then she leaves me there with my dick throbbing in my pants.

  “Fucking tease!” I yell at her back and she laughs. I’ll never get tired of that sound.

  “You started it asshole” she yells. Yup! She’s definitely my girl. I make sure to grab everything that we have in the pantry while she’s getting ready for our movie night. I even had enough time to shower and make us hot chocolate.

  “You made us a floor bed?” she asks as she walks into the lounge.

  I chuckle, “In America we call it a pallet babe.”

  She rolls her eyes. “Whatever, it’s a floor bed.” I figured if I made it comfortable then she wouldn’t have to move if she falls asleep. I know she’s tired and she still needs her rest. The only light we have comes from the t.v and it's perfect. She sits down on the floor and looks up at me. “Thank you for everything.” She says plucking at her pajamas. I fucking love that she’s comfortable wearing my shirts and socks. I’d thrown them on the bed whilst she was in the shower hoping she’d put them on when she got out.

  “Aren’t those too big on your feet?” I ask realizing she's snooped around my room and is wearing a pair of my socks too.

  She giggles, “Yeah, but they’re so nice and fluffy, plus they keep my feet warm.”

  I hand her the tv remote and give her a quick kiss.

  “Pick a movie babe.” I say and she blinks at me.

  “You’ll watch whatever I pick?” she asks, her eyes going wide.

  “Yeah.” I laugh at her.

  Her face scrunches. “You won’t fall asleep, right?”

  “Will you just pick a movie?” I laugh, popping an Oreo in my mouth. “Babe, I won’t fall asleep, I promise.” She gives me a yeah right look, but she finds a movie for us to watch. I end up not watching the movie, I sit here and watch her instead. She laughs, she gets upset, cries, and sighs through the whole thing while I fall in love with her repeatedly.

  “I love, love” she says while she wipes her left over tears away. My heart is crazy about her. She takes a deep breath. “I can’t believe you sat there and made me eat all that junk food,” she says. She was also a funny little thing.

  “Babe, I’m pretty sure even if I said something you’d still eat it anyways.”

  She laughed. “Yeah, you’re right.” She kisses me. “I love you” She tastes sweet.

  “I love you too” I say and I start cleaning up our little mess and heading for the kitchen. She walks in behind me and I ask “What are you doing?”

  She looks at me in confusion, “Umm, helping you?”

  I grab what she’d picked up and say, “I got it babe. Now sit your cute little ass back down in there and find something else to watch.”

  She rolls her eyes. “Why? So you can sit there and watch me cry like a crazy person?” she asks. I laugh and smack her tight little ass before she walks out of the kitchen. Wiseass. I make sure everything is put away and clean because I don’t want her to worry about anything at all. I check the doors are locked and the alarm is on. She found another movie, but she’s pretty quiet when I got back to the living-room. She’s fallen asleep with her glasses on. I slowly take them off because I don’t want to wake her up and I don’t want her to break them or be uncomfortable as she sleeps. There are a few loose strands of hair in her face so I move those out of the way. Is it possible to miss her so fucking bad even when she’s right here with me? Because that’s pretty much how she makes me feel. I sit there and study every single part of her beautiful face. She’s so beautiful that every time I kiss a different spot on her face, my heart starts to beat faster and harder. I don’t want to wake her, but I can’t help how bad I want to kiss her on her lips.

  “Eli” she moans. I want to be inside of her, but I need to love her first. I kiss her ear.

  “I love you,” I whisper. She moans at the sound of my voice and I kiss down her neck. My hands find their way under her shirt and I need to feel her skin so I slowly pull the shirt over her head and toss it to the side. I start kissing the other side of her neck and down to her chest. I can feel her heart beating fast. I suck on her nipple into my mouth and she moans. I kiss my way to her other nipple and lap at it with my tongue.

  “Eli” she breathes my name on a moan and it is th
e hottest fucking thing I’ve ever heard.

  “Let me love you baby.” I say as I run my hand down her thigh as she slowly opens her legs without me asking. I move her panties to the side while I kiss my way back to her mouth. Fuck, she’s so wet for me.

  “I want you,” she moans.

  “I know baby.” I whisper as I kiss my way down to her body. I move myself between her legs and I can smell how turned on she is. I love the way she fucking smells. I grab both of her legs and open them wider. I kiss her stomach, slowly working my way down to the inside of her thighs.

  “Ahh, Eli.” She hisses as I slowly pull her panties down and off of her. I make sure to suck on her panties before I toss them to the side. I kiss my way back up her thigh then I cover her pussy with my mouth. She grabs my hair.

  “Oh my god!” she moans. I flick her clit with my tongue before I start pulling on it with my teeth and my girl fucking loves it. “Eli, you’re going to make me come” she moans louder. I slide two fingers inside of her and start sucking on her harder. She pulls my hair and grinds out “Shit! I’m going to come…. shit!”

  I grab her with my other hand and I pull her in more and suck harder. My dick is so fucking hard I want to come, but I need to take care of my girl first. I can feel her pussy getting tighter around my fingers and I know she’s getting close. “Come for me baby” I say and she starts fucking my face harder. I suck harder while my fingers are still inside of her.

  “Baby, I’m coming” she cries.

  I pull my fingers out and place my hands on her hips. “Come on my tongue baby, I need to taste you.” I watch her as she throws her head back before she comes hard on my tongue.

  “Oh my god!” she cries out. I kiss her one more time on her pussy before I work my way back up her body. I pull my shirt over my head and toss it to the side with her things. I pull my sweats down and my dick springs out from under the restraint of my boxers. I need to be inside of her, now.

  “I want to taste you” she moans.

  Fuck. “Not right now baby” I say as I move her legs apart and spread them wider. I lean in and kiss her while I play with her oversensitive clit, she’s still soaked for me. I grab my dick and I slowly push inside of her.