Easy Love

by K. Alice Compeau

  After rinsing off, Grant climbed out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. The steam blocked his view of himself in the mirror, and he knew he’d been in the shower longer than he’d planned. He quickly grabbed his robe from the hook and pulled it around his body, tying it off. Scooping his smoky clothes from the floor, he opened the door, the steam chasing him out as he sprinted around the corner to the laundry closet, tossing his clothes inside the washer and slipping into his room. He pulled on some clean underwear and a set of pajamas and returned to the dining room.

  “Well, I said a quick shower.” Nana shook her head at him.

  “Sorry, Nana. I had some sore muscles in my back.” He avoided eye contact with her, sure she could see the guilt spread across his face as though he were thirteen again. Sliding into his seat, he grabbed the glass of water and chugged it down.

  Nana took the lid off the pot of stew and ladled it into both bowls. “Any idea what you’re going to do this summer for work? I assume you won’t be returning to Rivers next year.”

  “I’ve already interviewed with the fire department. I start in the fall. I have enough money set aside to be fine for the summer.”

  Grant frowned. He’d miss seeing Lottie across the hall every day, and it suddenly occurred to him that he wouldn’t have a reason to see her anymore once summer began. A frantic, swirling need to tell her how he felt about her filled his stomach. Groaning, he pushed the bowl of stew away.

  “Something wrong? You love my beef stew.” Nana dropped the spoon she’d almost raised to her lips and rested it back in her bowl, twisting in her seat to look at him more directly.

  “I need to break things off with Tiffany. I know you love her, and I think she’s a great girl, but we don’t have anything in common, and I can’t date her for you.”

  “Date her for me?” Nana sat back in her chair. “Is that the only reason you’re seeing her? Because I want you to?”

  “Not the only reason. She’s beautiful and she’s really sweet, but I don't enjoy spending time with her.” He took another sip of water. “And I want Lottie.”

  Nana crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair, not saying a word. Grant couldn’t read what she was thinking or feeling. More disapproval for Lottie? Disappointment over Tiffany?

  “Nana, I know you disapprove of her, but spending time with her is all I want to do. I think about her, even when I’m with Tiffany. All I do is think how much different things would be if I were with Lottie instead. The school year is coming to an end, and I won’t get to see her anymore. I know you don’t like that she’s officially still married—even though her husband left her and moved to Hawaii with someone else—but I feel like I need to tell her how I feel about her before the school year is over. The thought of not seeing her every day makes me miserable.” Grant looked up from the edge of the bowl he’d been staring at and glanced at Nana, who still hadn’t moved.

  Slowly, her brown-speckled, wrinkled hand made its way across the table. Palm up, she held it out to him. He placed his hand in hers. Her fingers curled around his, squeezing it tight. “I know I pushed you to be with Tiffany, but I also know what it’s like to fall in love with someone. I guess it doesn’t matter who me or Papa Joe thought would be great for you. The only one you should listen to is your heart.”

  A smile stretched across Grant’s lips. The urge to run over to Lottie’s place and tell her how he felt doubled the swirling in his stomach. Remembering her crying in his truck stopped him from doing so. He would force himself to be patient and give her time to get over whatever was bugging her, for at least another few days anyway until the last day of school for teachers, then he’d have to tell her.

  With a plan set in his mind and the loving support of Nana, he pulled the stew toward him, sniffed in the delicious heartiness of it, and took a big bite. After devouring the bowl, without even having to reach for more, Nana put another ladleful in his bowl. He grinned and continued to eat. After finishing their dinner, they both sat back in their seats, full and satisfied. Grant felt so relieved to have Nana’s support, but the thought of telling Tiffany ate at him.

  “Excuse me, Nana. I’ll be right back to help you clear the dishes. I need to return Tiffany’s text and find some time to sit down with her.” He pushed himself away from the table as Nana pressed her lips into a smile and nodded. It was obvious that Nana was as uneasy for Tiffany’s impeding heartache as he was. A tinge of ache pinged in his stomach for Nana as he realized that Nana had enjoyed all the company she’d received from Tiffany while they were dating. That would surely come to an end.

  “Hey, Nana.” Grant peeked back around the corner of the dining room to Nana who sat with a somber face.

  “Yes?”

  “Thanks.”

  A genuine smile spread across Nana’s face, and she winked at him. He smiled, headed to this room, sat on the corner of his bed, and picked up his phone.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Lottie

  Still sweating and giggling over the looks on the faces of everyone who smelled the sulfuric farts leaking from Beth’s ass during spin, they climbed into Beth’s Jeep and headed to her house.

  “Should we order a pizza?” Lottie asked.

  “If you let me get green olives on it.” Beth wagged her brows.

  “Fine but only as long as you don’t ask for extra. I can’t stand when every bite is overloaded with them.”

  “Deal.” Beth winked as they pulled out the base gate and made the short drive to Beth’s place. The night air blew through the Jeep, drying the sweat that had accumulated in Lottie’s hair, causing her to shiver. She struggled to pull the hoodie that was tied around her waist up—a difficult task within the constraints of the seatbelt—and push her arms inside.

  “Is Michael already flying?” Lottie asked.

  “Yeah, and I’m glad. I’m a little mad at him.”

  “Why? What did he do?” Lottie stared at Beth with wide eyes.

  “He told me he was flying with initial quals tonight.” Beth’s lip crinkled.

  “So?”

  “I hate when he tells me that. I hate knowing when he’s flying with fuckers who don’t know dick. I mean, at what point do you determine a landing is bad? And now that I’m pregnant, I don’t want any extra stress. I’ll fart even more than I already do.” Beth pulled into the driveway. “Let’s order the pizza. I’m starving. You mind calling? I gotta pee so bad.”

  “I don’t mind.” Lottie padded into the kitchen as Beth flew down the hall to the bathroom, clearly not even bothering to close the door.

  “Aahhhh.” Beth’s voice rang out as loud as the pee stream. “Better than an orgasm.”

  Lottie pulled the drawer of menus open and fished out the pizza one, grinning as she realized that she’d get to control the amount of olives that would end up on the pizza. She dialed and ordered, having them put “extra olives” on half. Why not give a pregnant lady all the olives she’s craving?

  “I swear this baby is still the size of a booger, but I’m peeing way too often. What’s going to happen when it’s full size?” Beth wiped her wet hands on Lottie’s cheeks.

  “Ew! That better not be pee.” Lottie scowled and wiped her face with a tea towel.

  Beth smirked and raised her eyebrows.

  “I can’t believe you’re going to be responsible for the upbringing of a little human being.” Lottie shook her head.

  “Well, believe it. But fear not because this kid will have its Auntie Lottie to bore things down.”

  “I’m not boring.” Lottie frowned. “And you’ll move and leave me. Maybe before you even have the baby.”

  Silence filled the room. Beth knew Lottie was right. As with all military friendships, they lasted a lifetime, but the togetherness was always short-lived. Tears filled Beth’s eyes.

  “Are those tears?” Lottie squinted and moved in.

  “Oh, shut up. It’s the pregnancy. You know I’m not normally like this.” Beth turned and hid
her face.

  Lottie hugged her from behind. Beth let a few tears escape. They landed on Lottie’s arms. Lottie hugged her tighter. “We have modern technology. We can video chat all the time. It’ll be great.”

  Beth turned and smiled. “Yeah. We’ll always be in each other’s lives.”

  “Always.” Lottie smiled, but her stomach sank. She couldn’t imagine living in Altus without Beth, and the thought of living in Hawaii with David wasn’t bringing her much comfort either. The more she thought about the possibility, the more she wondered exactly what it was she really wanted.

  The doorbell rang, causing the two of them to jump.

  “Pizza’s here.” Beth walked to the door. “I’m starved.”

  “It can’t be here that fast,” Lottie said, eyebrow crooked.

  Beth pulled open the door. Lottie was right behind her.

  “Oh, hey, Jeff. What are you doing here? Michael has a night flight.” Beth hands flew to her face, and she gasped. “Is something wrong?”

  “No,” quickly replied Major Jeff Simmons, who stood at the door in his flight suit. “Everything’s fine. Sorry to scare you.”

  Beth clutched her chest. “I should punch you for scaring me. Why are you here?”

  “I’m actually here to see Lottie. I stopped by her place, and when she wasn’t home, I thought she might be here.” Jeff had a solemn look on his face and avoided eye contact with Lottie even though she was now standing right beside Beth.

  “Well, here she is.” Beth motioned to Lottie.

  He unzipped the pocket on the leg of his flight suit and pulled out an envelope. Lifting his eyes, he looked at Lottie for the first time and held out the envelope. “I’m sorry to be the one to do this, Lottie.”

  Lottie reached out and took the envelope. “What’s this?”

  “Divorce papers from David.” Jeff backed away a few steps. “I’m really sorry.” He turned and climbed into his truck and drove away without looking at her again.

  Lottie’s free hand raised to touch her parted lips as she stared down at the envelope in her hand. Had he really said “divorce papers?” No letter from David? No call. No explanation. What had she done wrong? The pit of her stomach opened up and filled with foolishness for writing him every day, anger for being used, and pain. Vaguely aware of Beth’s arms wrapping around her, she stood, unmoving and breathless. Was her heart even beating?

  As though someone else were doing it, Lottie robotically opened the envelope and pulled out the papers inside. She couldn’t absorb what she was looking at, as though the letter was written in Italian. The letters were familiar but indecipherable to her.

  Unsure how long she stood there, she was suddenly aware that Beth had let go of her and was talking to someone new at the door. The pizza delivery person was asking if Lottie was okay and Beth replied that she was, paid, and thanked them for the pizza. She disappeared, returned, and began rubbing Lottie’s back.

  “Lot, honey. Let’s move into the living room and sit down, okay?” Beth guided her into the living room. Lottie nodded the whole way.

  She slunk down into the sofa, still staring at the papers. Raising her head, she looked at Beth. “What a dick.” The only thought and only words that she could piece together shot out like an arrow.

  “He really is.” Beth nodded.

  “He’s not even in Hawaii yet. There’s no way he did this while he was deployed. He must have prepared all this before he talked to me—before he asked me to write to him. He knew he was going to send these papers when I was sucking his dick.” Lottie threw the papers to the floor.

  Beth stared with her mouth gaping. Lottie knew the dick-sucking part was a shock to her. She’d never revealed that pathetic piece of information.

  She turned to Beth with shame-filled eyes. “What do I do now?”

  Beth shrugged. “Sign ‘em and move on.”

  Tears spilled down Lottie’s cheeks. “I’m such a fucking idiot. I can’t believe I let him manipulate me, again. I thought he wanted to get back together, but he was just using me. Wasn’t he?”

  Beth’s lips pursed.

  “You knew he was using me, didn’t you?” Lottie searched Beth’s face. “I know, I wouldn’t listen. Why do I always cave to him?”

  “Because you’re a loving person. And sometimes that means you give more than you should to people who don’t deserve you. That doesn’t mean anything’s wrong with you. Something is wrong with him. Don’t let him make you feel like an idiot. You’re amazing.” Beth moved next to Lottie and wrapped her arms around her.

  “I want to go home.” Lottie stared at the papers, shaking her head.

  “Do you want me to wrap up some pizza for you? I can come with you if you want.”

  “I don’t mean home to my place. I mean, I want to go home to Michigan. I don’t want to think about any of this.” Lottie scooped up the papers, rose, and walked into Beth’s kitchen. She pulled out the same junk drawer that contained the menus and riffled through it until she found a pen.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I’m going to sign the stupid papers.”

  “I think you have to do that in front of a notary.”

  “Shit.” Lottie tossed the pen back in the drawer and slid it shut. She stuffed the papers back in the envelope and put it in her back pocket.

  “You’re going back to Michigan for good?”

  “I don’t think so, but I can’t be here right now.”

  “What about the rest of the school year? It’s the students’ last day tomorrow.”

  “I’ll be there tomorrow, but I’m going to talk to Dan about not returning after. Can you clean out my classroom for me?”

  “Of course I can.” Beth took Lottie’s hands in hers. “I’ll do anything you need me to do.”

  “Thanks. I’m going to go back to my place, call my mom, and pack.”

  “Do you want me to come and help you?” Beth squeezed her hands.

  “No. I think I just want to be alone right now.”

  “Okay, let me grab my keys and I’ll drive you home.” Beth reached for the keys on the counter.

  “I’m gonna walk.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah. I need to clear my head a little. A walk will be good.” Lottie pulled her hands free from Beth, spun on her heel, and headed out the door. She walked straight home, all the while knowing that if she looked back, she’d see Beth behind her.

  Pulling out her keys, she could hear Pickles barking excitedly, happy for her return. “Hey, Pickles.” She scratched his ears as she walked in. He rolled over onto his back, awaiting a belly rub, but Lottie just didn’t have the energy. She stepped over him and walked into her bedroom, fishing her suitcase from the closet. As though she were a mindless zombie, she began stuffing clothes inside with no purpose or idea of how long she would be gone.

  Lottie picked up the phone and called her mom. There was no answer. She wasn’t going to leave news like that on an answering machine, so she hung up. Perhaps the news would be better told in person anyway. She decided she’d just show up on her parents’ doorstep, bags and dog in hand. That way, her mom wouldn’t have time to object to a dog being in her house.

  She padded into the kitchen, pulled open the cabinet under the sink, and grabbed a garbage bag. She dumped everything perishable inside—containers and all—and poured the milk down the drain. Dragging the heavy bag outside, she tossed it into the trash bin and pulled it out to the curb. What else would she need to take care of before she left?

  A thought washed over her, and she went inside and checked the clock; it was just after seven. She grinned, walked into her bathroom, opened the shower, and scooped her wedding band off the soap dish where she’d left it. She grabbed her keys as she passed through the kitchen.

  “Momma will be back in a bit, Pickles.” She closed the door and hopped in her car, heading straight for Red River Pawn. Once there, she hopped out of the car and headed straight toward the man on the counter
, slamming down the gold band.

  “How much will you give me for this?”

  The man picked up the ring, inspected it, and then weighed it. “You looking to pawn or sell?”

  “Sell.”

  “I’ll give you forty bucks for it.”

  “That’s all?”

  “That’s all I can give you. I need to make a few bucks off it when I sell it, and it really isn’t worth much more than that.”

  Lottie pursed her lips. “Cheap bastard.”

  “Well, I’m sorry, ma’am. You’re welcome to take it to the other shops in town, but I don’t think you’re going to get much more than that.” The man pushed the ring back over to her.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean you. I meant my ex-husband.”

  The man’s eyes filled with pity.

  Lottie pushed the ring back toward him with her finger. “It’s a deal.”

  After filling out some paperwork, Lottie took her two twenty-dollar bills and stuffed them into her wallet, anxious to spend them and be free of David completely. At least they would help pay for her gas to Michigan. During the drive back to her place, she glanced at the empty space on her finger where the ring used to be, unsure of how she felt knowing it would never be there again. Even though she hadn’t worn it in nearly two months, there was always a possibility before.

  Back at home, she slowly walked toward the house that never really felt like a home, stopping on the front porch to survey the neighborhood.

  “I don’t belong here,” she muttered before turning, unlocking the door, and heading inside. She kicked off her shoes and let Pickles outside. Her stomach swirled and her body ached. She felt like she’d just taken a beating from the inside. Being awake was painful and breathing was laborious.

  She let Pickles back in after he peed and scratched him behind the ears. “It’s just you and me from now on, buddy. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you to take care of.”