Desperate for Love

by Aliana James

  Alec handed him the birthday gift and bent down to catch Grayson. He threw the boy over his shoulder.

  “Hi, Uncle Alec!”

  “Hey, has anyone seen the birthday boy?” Alec asked as he turned around, sending a laughing Grayson spinning on his shoulders.

  “Alec! Put him down before he gets dizzy,” Thalia said as she pushed her way through the crowd. Alec placed Grayson on his feet and then squatted to give him another hug. They whispered something to each other and Grayson kissed Alec on the cheek. As Alec stood, Grayson grabbed his hand and started to pull him toward the entrance to the Fun Zone.

  “Grayson, did you say hi to Uncle Travis?” Thalia asked with her hands on her hips.

  Grayson dropped Alec’s hand and ran over to Travis. He squatted down to receive the hug.

  “Happy birthday, little man,” he said ruffling his hair.

  “Mom! There’s Jeremy and Steven! Can we go inside now, please?” Grayson said, jumping up and down with excitement.

  Thalia laughed. “Yes. Hold on a minute. Let me give your uncles their bands.” She turned to Travis and handed him two blue bands. “For you and Alec.”

  Grayson grabbed her hand and tugged her across the room.

  “Grayson!” Alec called. Grayson stopped and turned to his uncle, who squatted down so they were eye level. “Don’t pull your mom like that. It’s rude.”

  “Sorry.”

  Thalia turned to greet a family who arrived and the young boy darted around the adults to find Grayson.

  “Happy birthday, Grayson!”

  “Thanks, Mark.”

  “Are you going to ride the rides now?”

  “In a minute. I’m talking to my uncle.”

  Grayson and Alec whispered to each other and when Alec stood, Grayson wrapped his hand around his.

  “Thalia,” Alec said, “I can take the kids in and keep an eye on them if you need to stay here.”

  Thalia nodded, waved, and took the birthday gift from Travis. Travis decided to follow Alec in case he needed a hand. They entered through a set of double doors and he had to keep himself from getting distracted. Music, he thought it might be rock, blared through the speakers and lights danced as they went through an archway into the main part of the building. Rides of every shape and size awaited them, each with their own sets of lights and music. They passed a ride that pulled kids up high and then dropped them, a set of ladybugs that a bunch of cute little girls were having a blast on, and another ride that spun the riders super fast.

  Alec stopped by a set of mini motorbikes and the boys got in line to ride. He came over and stood next to Travis and they waited on the opposite side of the rail.

  “Those are cute. I wish I could ride them,” he said as he gestured to the motorbikes. They went nice and slow and were more his speed.

  Alec leaned in and whispered in his ear, “You like to ride things fast. I don’t think they’d work for you.”

  His face grew warm and before he could slap Alec’s arm, Alec grabbed his hand and kissed it, laughing the whole time.

  “Why did your uncle kiss his hand?” a little boy asked Grayson, eyes locked on Alec’s hand on top of Travis’s on the rail. He waited to see if Alec heard him but he was looking at the ride.

  “Because they’re married,” Grayson said.

  “But they’re both boys,” the little boy answered, confusion etched on his face.

  “So, what? My mom says you can love anyone you choose,” Grayson shrugged.

  He loved this kid.

  “Oh.”

  The bell rang on the motorbike ride. Both boys turned as the attendant opened the gate for the boys to enter the ride area. Grayson looked at both of them and Travis gave him a smile and a thumbs up.

  The group of boys exited the ride, loud and laughing and were set to scatter in different directions when Alec stopped them. Within five minutes, Alec had everyone listening to every word he said. They walked to the bumper cars, everyone with a buddy and no one strayed from the line.

  “Uncle Travis? Are you going to ride the bumper cars?”

  Before he could answer, Alec spoke. “Uncle Travis gets terrible motion sickness on stuff like that.”

  Grayson scrunched up his face. “What is that?”

  Travis laughed. “It means the bumps from the cars make me sick.”

  “Oh. That’s not fun,” Grayson said.

  “No, it’s not. You go have fun with Uncle Alec.”

  It did look like fun. Different color cars on a track where the riders could either drive around the track or bump into each other. Most opted to bump. Too bad one carnival trip in college had ruined rides for Travis. He wasn’t surprised Alec remembered as Travis had been sick all day long.

  He found a spot on the opposite side where he could see them and the whole bumper car arena. The two of them waved and stood at the end of the line. Grayson spoke to his friends and included Alec in the conversation. Alec pointed out a some things to the kids, and they nodded along.

  “Alec has always been so good with him,” Thalia said as she joined Travis.

  “I’ve never seen him like this. He’s like a big kid and an Army Ranger all rolled into one.”

  Thalia laughed. “He takes his godfather duties seriously and likes Grayson to have fun. The trouble is that he wants him to behave at the same time. I told him sometimes that’s not possible.”

  The gate opened and everyone ran out to claim their cars. He didn’t see where Alec and Grayson went. Thalia peered around a pole and pointed to the back corner. The cars started moving and Travis heard Alec giving Grayson instructions and encouragement before he saw them pass by.

  “Alec made Grayson a promise that he’ll always be there for him. I think having the fathers we do makes it hard to trust a man. He didn’t want that for Grayson especially since his father is not around. With my father, you see the bad coming but with Alec’s… Uncle William has called Alec over the years, pleaded with him to help him, swore that this was the last time and lied through his teeth every time. Alec’s mom, well, she’s another piece of work. She only calls when she wants something from Alec or to complain. I’m surprised…”

  Thalia turned and without warning smacked Travis on the arm.

  “Ow! What was that for?” he asked, rubbing his arm. For a petite woman, she packed quite a punch.

  “What was with the quickie wedding? We would have liked to be there!”

  “I know. I’m sorry. Spur of the moment thing.”

  She laughed. “Sounds super romantic when you put it that way. It amazes me that after everything Alec’s parents put him through he’d ever consider marriage—much less actually get married.”

  Alec waved as he and Grayson whizzed past them, laughing every time their car bumped into another one.

  “I’m happy for you guys, happy that he has you. Alec smiles so much more. No one even questioned the two of you getting married because it made so much sense. Out of all of us, Alec has the least reason to settle down and trust anyone regardless of the stupid ultimatum my grandfather has given us.”

  Thalia waved to her son and made a face at Alec as they passed by again. A mother waved at Thalia from the other side of the bumper car arena.

  “That’s Cathy. I have to say hi. Excuse me,” she said.

  Over the years, Alec had mentioned little things about his parents but Travis never thought about the extent of the damage they had done. All this time, he thought the only thing Alec was risking was money—money Alec could afford to lose.

  Alec helped two of Grayson’s friends untangle themselves from the seat belt and lifted a small boy out of another car. They all started speaking to him at once and he pointed to the roller coaster. A chorus of yells went off, and he pretended to race them the couple of steps to the roller coaster. Travis walked over to where they were standing.

  “Grayson, you’re lucky. Your uncle is so cool,” a little boy said. Grayson smiled at him and then noticed Travis standing by th
e rail.

  “Hi, Uncle Travis! Can you ride the roller coaster?”

  “No, sorry.”

  “What’s wrong with you?” a little boy asked, looking at Travis.

  “Nothing’s wrong with him. He gets… how do you say it, Uncle Travis?” Grayson asked.

  “Motion sickness.”

  The little boy nodded and then the attendant called them to line up with the others. He waved to Alec and Grayson as they were buckled into the car. Alec’s large frame looked ridiculous in the small coaster. It amazed him there was even room for Grayson to sit next to him. Grayson’s face broke into a huge grin and he threw his hands up in the air as the coaster started racing past Travis. The coaster dipped down and came out in front of him. He waved and took a few pictures on his cell phone. Before he knew it, the ride was over. Grayson and two boys were talking to Alec as he exited the ride.

  “Why don’t you guys head to the next ride? Stay with Mrs. Peterson,” Alec said, his eyes on Travis’s.

  The boys ran off with Mrs. Peterson and Alec stopped in front of him. “I’m sorry. I forgot about your motion sickness. This must be so boring for you.”

  “I’m not bored. I’m having fun watching you.” Alec smirked and Travis rolled his eyes before he continued. “Stop it. You’re fun to watch… uh, forget I said anything.”

  “Hard to forget. In fact, parts of me are taking notice,” Alec joked.

  “You’re ridiculous.” He shook his head and watched Grayson in the distance. “He’s such a sweet kid. You’re great with him.”

  The aisles, crowded with families, had them squeezing through certain sections to walk in the direction the kids had gone. His arm brushed up against Alec’s and Alec slipped his hand into his. Their hands fit together like puzzle pieces, his hand with its long fingers snug inside Alec’s larger hand. Peter never liked to hold hands and Travis didn’t realize how much he missed it. And how much he liked it. He didn’t want to remind Alec that they shouldn’t be holding hands at all.

  “He is a great kid. I fell in love with him the moment he was born.”

  “I knew you and Thalia were close but didn’t realize…”

  “We’ve always been close but I was just as surprised when she asked me to be in the room. I think she chose me over her mother because she wanted someone who would help her focus, not cause her additional stress,” Alec said with a sigh. “He was so tiny back then. To watch him take his first breath, that’s something I will never forget.”

  He could hear the wonder and excitement in Alec’s voice. Alec would make an amazing father. It would be so easy to get caught up in a fantasy involving he and Alec having a child.

  They reached a crossroads where several paths met. A bell sounded in the distance and Alec’s eyes lit up. He pointed to a sign marked ‘Carnival Games!’ They followed the winding path to a group of red and white striped booths. Each stood with a different game and prize. Circus music blared through the speakers while game attendants called out game stats to the participants. A man with his face painted was dressed in a huge hat and gold pants and making balloon animals for the kids surrounding him.

  They passed a booth where a man tried to hit a mole with a huge hammer as it popped up. Travis stopped Alec at the next booth. “Let’s do this one.”

  “Water guns? Really?” Alec asked.

  Travis pulled out his wallet and gave the attendant a ten-dollar bill.

  “Gentleman, each of you take a seat. When the bell rings, you job is to focus on the target in front of you. As you hit the target with your water gun, Fred, the friendly cartoon mouse, will run up this wall. Whomever gets their mouse to the cheese first wins!”

  Alec picked a stool, two down from where Travis sat.

  “What’s the matter?”

  “I don’t want you to distract me.”

  Travis shook his head and laughed.

  “Ready? One, two, three, go!”

  He focused on the little red target, but holding the small water gun straight was more of a challenge than actually hitting the target.

  “And we have a winner!” the attendant called.

  “I can’t believe it,” Alec said.

  He’d won! The attendant came over with two different-colored giraffes and he chose the white and yellow one. He tried not to laugh as he turned to see Alec’s face.

  “Stop pouting.”

  “That was rigged. Those water guns aren’t built for hands as big as mine. I still can’t believe you beat me.”

  “I did!” He smiled. He couldn’t believe he beat Alec either.

  Alec laughed and put his arm around him. Some of the mothers turned and stared at the two of them but he didn’t care. Let them.

  A large booth was set up in the middle of all the other carnival games. This one was decorated with a gold and red awning and massive bears in black, white and brown hanging in the middle. Alec stopped and stared.

  “I’m going to win you a bear.”

  “What bear? Oh, no, Alec. It’s huge.” Alec walked up to the attendant, pulled some money out of his pocket, and handed over a couple bills. The game involved tossing rings over these different colored milk jugs and the one he needed to land was in the center of them all.

  “Alec.”

  “Shh, I have to concentrate.”

  Travis shook his head and glanced at his watch. He’d give him five minutes and then tell him Grayson needed—

  “And we have a winner!”

  He looked up at Alec and then over at the attendant. Travis’s mouth opened in shock as the attendant unhooked the large teddy bear from the wall and handed it over to Alec.

  “You got it on the middle one?” he asked in disbelief.

  “Yes, sir he did. On the second try. I’ve never seen anyone do that before,” the attendant said as she smiled at him. “Enjoy your bear.”

  “Alec, how in the world did you do that?”

  A huge grin was plastered across Alec’s face. “We used to play a toss game during our downtime.”

  Damn Army Ranger.

  “Don’t even think about giving the bear to Grayson. It’s yours. In fact, I’m going to put it in the car.”

  Before he could argue, Alec took the giraffe and the bear and went out a side exit door.

  Travis

  Travis hadn’t slept much last night, worrying about what Alec’s grandfather might say during their meeting. What the hell had he gotten himself into? Overjoyed for the opportunity, he feared he would screw it up and embarrass Alec in the process.

  Walking into the Bennett building was like being in a dream. Walls of light blinded him. The lobby joined gorgeous architecture with an amazing collection of art in the center flanked by two fountains. As he went through security, he noticed sitting areas and little nooks with tables and lounge chairs. On his left, he passed a daycare center and to his right, a gym. A woman with a tablet approached him.

  “Sir, can I help you?” she asked.

  “Yes, I’m looking for the elevators.”

  “And your name, please?”

  “Travis Andrews.” A group of people sat on the lounge chairs while others entered the gym off the lobby. No one rushed.

  “Yes, Mr. Andrews, we’ve been expecting you. Right this way, please.”

  Mr. Bennet said nine o’clock. He exhaled as he double checked his watch, not yet 8:45 a.m.

  They turned the corner and entered a long corridor, with offices on both sides. The end housed two separate banks of elevators, one on the left and one on the right. He followed the woman to the right, where she walked past the cluster to the last elevator.

  “Right this way, Mr. Andrews. My name is Jeanne and I will escort you to the executive tower.” She smiled, and he smiled back.

  Executive tower? Thomson had an executive floor.

  The elevator opened and Jeanne gestured for him to follow her. If he thought the lobby was amazing, that was nothing. Views of Manhattan greeted him on three sides. How far up were they?


  A reception counter stood in front of them and he stared in awe at the bank of windows behind it. How did someone work here without getting vertigo?

  A door opened to the left, and they entered a room with two sofas and a secretary at the opposite end.

  “Mary, I have Mr. Andrews here for Mr. Bennett.”

  Nerves shot through him. No one had ever announced him before. The whole thing overwhelmed him and bordered on the unbelievable. He didn’t believe it was real until he received a new hire employee packet by courier on Monday. The head of Human Resources for Bennett called him after with instructions to have it back by five p.m. and to gather the names of any team members coming with him.

  A wall of pictures caught his eye. Many showed Alec’s great-grandfather and grandfather with various people.

  “Bennett has done great work over the years. It still amazes me how far we’ve come.”

  Travis turned to see Mr. Bennett standing behind him, his hands in his pockets, gazing at the photos.

  “This one here was taken when my father purchased the building. I remember him telling me that when he asked a passerby to take the picture, they said he was crazy wanting to take a picture in front of a pile of rubble.” Grandfather chuckled as he extended his hand. “Nice to see you, Travis. Welcome to Bennett.”

  “Thank you, sir.” Travis shook his hand and stood surprised when Grandfather held on to it. He placed his other hand on top of Travis’s.

  “None of this ‘sir’ business. You’re welcome to call me William at the office.” He chuckled.

  He understood why Alec looked up to this man.

  William stood next to him and pointed to a picture near the bottom.

  “That’s Juan. He’s retired. At one time, his whole family worked for me. He has two daughters, Maria and Ella, both graduated college with honors. Maria works in engineering and Ella in security.”

  William moved to his left and pointed out a picture near the top. “That was right after Alec was born. I closed on a piece of property on Long Island. No one wanted it because an auto demo place was right next door and the sounds of metal crunching, the mess, the fumes were a huge turnoff. Marco helped me turn it around and we bought out the auto place five years later. It’s a gorgeous medical center now.”