Faking Reality

by Sara Fujimura

  “Ready to do our part to help out our dear friends, the Matsudas,” Mom says from their station behind the cash register.

  Over one hundred tiny rabbit manju, each in its own packaging, sit in fluffles on ornate cupcake stands borrowed from Sweet Lil Something Bakery.

  I glance over at Sasha. Aurora’s makeup skills cleverly mask the two hours of sleep Sasha got last night while prepping all the manju for today.

  “In that case”—I slide on Ojiichan’s oversized happi coat and tie the fabric around my forehead—“it’s time to work.”

  As planned, Nevaeh zooms in on the large donation jar on our table—already primed with some cash from our new Wisteria Village Café friends. Then Nevaeh zooms out to find me behind the table with a special guest wearing a ridiculous tiara.

  “If you get down here in the next forty-five minutes,” I look over at Rayne, who gives the camera a thumb-and-index-finger heart. “Rayne Lee will be here signing autographs and taking pictures before she flies back to New York City. You saw her perform last night at my birthday party. Now, here’s your chance to meet her in person.”

  “But no body parts though, people, because that’s weird,” Rayne says.

  “And gross.”

  Rayne throws an arm around my shoulders. “Rayne Lee and…”

  “Dakota McDonald out. Peace.”

  “I’ll get this up on your social media ASAP.” Stephanie takes the phone from Nevaeh. “Then, I’ll give it a push on the show’s channels.” As usual, she can read my mind. “Don’t worry, Dakota. We broke a three last night. Phil is ecstatic. Keep on keeping it real. Fans love it.”

  “Do you think the tiara is too much?” Rayne says after Stephanie leaves.

  “Never.” Nevaeh adjusts the pink tiara still perched on their colorful, short-haired head.

  Rayne fingers the tiara my stylist insisted she could keep, especially if she wears it in public and tags her company on Instagram.

  “I know I’ll get slammed for it, but I don’t care. A Pop Princess needs a tiara when she’s doing promo pictures with a Cinnamon Roll Prince. But first”—Rayne pulls Nevaeh next to her for a selfie—“I think tiaras should be the next fashion trend, don’t you?”

  My video probably hasn’t even hit the internet yet, but the crowds are already picking up. There’s a tingling in my chest, warning me that this is dangerous. I’m exposed out here, especially after last night. Aurora’s laugh refocuses me. The people who I love and trust the most are around me. I can put Ojiichan and his most treasured possessions—his family and his restaurant—first for one day.

  “Can I get a picture with my favorite DIY Princess?” I hear from across the tent.

  With a nod of encouragement from Stephanie and a Fujifilm Instax pulled magically from the Magic Handbag in his hand, Alex walks toward my station. Conflicting emotions swirl around in my head until I feel dizzy. I look over at Leo. He and The Full Dimple are clowning around with Rayne Lee. I don’t even feel stabby about it.

  Even Alex’s simple “Hey” makes me feel guilty. We agreed earlier that we would take our relationship one day at a time, but that was before Leo’s truth came out. I can’t go forward with Alex, just like I can’t go backwards with Leo.

  Alex and I stand there in an awkward silence, which feels like years.

  “I saw the footage of your official dance with Leo this morning on YouTube,” Alex says.

  “Everything last night…” I mime an explosion. “I’m sorry. I feel like I wasted your time.”

  “Please don’t ever think it was wasted time, Dakota.” Alex takes my hands in his. “Because I don’t.”

  “Alex, I—”

  My heart clenches when Alex steps close to me. It gets even worse when I see somebody in the rapidly increasing crowd with their phone out, pretending like they aren’t taking pictures of us. Alex drops his head to whisper in my ear.

  “Just because we aren’t endgame, Dakota, doesn’t mean we weren’t right for each other at the time. In another time or another place, maybe we would’ve even been perfect for each other.” Alex hugs me tight. “But that’s not how the stars aligned. So starting now, I’ll be officially hanging out in your Friend Zone.”

  A weight lifts off my chest. I don’t care if I make it on the front page of the tabloids next week or not. I stretch up and kiss Alex’s cheek.

  “Thank you. I know the perfect girl is waiting for you in North Carolina. In your whole new, wonderfully uncomplicated life as a baseball-player-slash-tuxedo-model.”

  Alex throws his head back and laughs. “Can I still take a picture with you though? Otherwise nobody is going to believe that I was your almost-date to the infamous Sweet Sixteen party.”

  When I nod, Alex stretches out his arm as far as it will go to take the picture.

  “Here, let me do that for you.” Rayne takes the camera from him. “I’m going to have to come back to Phoenix more often, Dakota. All your friends are so fun and down-to-earth and, you know, real.”

  I look over at Leo’s station. I don’t know what Rayne said or did, but Leo is bright red and Aurora and Nevaeh are howling with laughter. Rayne takes our picture. While we are waiting for the camera to spit out the picture, Rayne looks Alex up and down.

  “Hiiiii, I’m Rayne. Dakota’s new friend. And you are?”

  Alex puts out his hand. “Alex Santos. Dakota’s … friend and former dance partner.”

  “Don’t forget tuxedo model,” I say.

  And that’s how Rayne Lee missed her flight, and we ended up on the front page of the tabloids the following week together: “Teen Divas Brawl over Tuxedo Model at After Party.”

  Smoke and mirrors and sound bites. That’s what we do. And that’s what’s going to save the day. And hopefully, save the Matsudas’ restaurant too.

  Chapter

  35

  “Ii yo. Daijōbu da.” Ojiichan grumbles, pushing Mr. Matsuda’s helping hand away and telling everybody that he’s fine.

  “Yep, he’s back to normal,” Leo says.

  Ojiichan lightly baka slaps the back of Leo’s head as he hobbles past us to his bedroom. Mrs. Matsuda carries in a small overnight bag and sets it on the kitchen counter.

  “Where are the girls?” Mrs. Matsuda says.

  “Asleep,” Leo says. “Sasha didn’t even make it to dinner.”

  Which definitely made our new-and-improved Matsuda Monday even better. Especially when Aurora retreated with her pizza to her parents’ room so that she could FaceTime with Jayden. Leo fixes the throw pillows, which fell off the couch during our marathon kissing experiment after dinner. I rub my index finger across my lips. Yep, still feeling the sparks.

  “We all deserved a day off after this weekend.” Mrs. Matsuda puts a glass of water and some pills on a decorative tray. “What a weekend.”

  “I got Ojiichan into bed.” Mr. Matsuda pokes his head into the kitchen. “I’m heading upstairs to sleep for the next three days.”

  “Ms. Tamlyn said Koty could stay until ten if I wanted her to.” Leo looks at me and then his dad. “I want her to.”

  “There’s more pizza if you want a midnight snack.” I open up the top box of pizza, which nobody has touched, because who puts artichokes on pizza?

  Mrs. Matsuda wraps her arms around me. “Thank you, Koty-chan.”

  “It’s just gross pizza.”

  “No, for everything.” Mrs. Matsuda fingers the tiny, tasteful tiara on my head, which Nevaeh insisted that I wear to school today. She shakes her head but doesn’t comment. Meanwhile, Nevaeh and I have a bet going on how long it takes for a “No Tiaras” rule to be added to the official school dress code.

  “Mom, should they have let Ojiichan come home so soon?” Leo’s voice is tight.

  Mrs. Matsuda pulls Leo into our hug. “We’re going to keep the restaurant closed for the next week. Possibly longer. Right now, let’s focus on Ojiichan.”

  Mrs. Matsuda breaks away from us so she can hand Leo the tray. “How about you de
liver these to Ojiichan? He wanted to talk to you.”

  Leo gulps but accepts the tray. Leo is only two steps out of the kitchen before he gestures for me to follow him.

  “Konban wa, Ojiichan,” I greet him after Leo pushes me through the door first like a human shield.

  “Dakota-chan, my bonus granddaughter. Thank you for the picture.” Ojiichan’s bruised hand shakes as he puts the sketch I did of Leo this afternoon on his bedside table.

  “Here are your meds, Ojiichan.” Leo holds the tray until Ojiichan gets all four pills down.

  “Dōmo.” Ojiichan leans back against the headboard of his bed. “Leo-kun, we need to talk. Your father says that you have been secretly saving up money all year to go on a vacation with your girlfriend.”

  “Ugh. No. It’s a class trip to Japan with Iwate-sensei and twenty of my classmates.” Leo looks at me. “And my girlfriend. The one whose series of awesome ideas helped me make it happen.”

  “Ah, I knew this would happen.” Ojiichan picks up a small photo frame on his bedside table. It’s a faded picture of Ojiichan as a much younger man sitting next to an attractive woman with long, straight hair. A chubby-cheeked baby sits on her lap. “At the Homecoming Carnival, I saw Koty-chan looking at you. My Michiko-chan looked at me the same way when I was a young man. I thought, ‘Oh, this boy is in big trouble.’”

  “Um, ow, Ojiichan,” I say.

  Ojiichan laughs and gestures at Leo. “This boy is in big trouble because he does not think with his head.”

  Leo cringes. “Seriously, Ojiichan?”

  “I know because I was the same.” Ojiichan puts his weathered hand over Leo’s and pats it. “I would give anything to have just one more day with my Michiko-chan.”

  Ojiichan’s eyes are watery as he places the picture back on his nightstand. Leo sits on the side of the bed and puts the tray on the nightstand too.

  “Ojiichan. I need to tell you the full truth. I want to go to the Matsuda Manju shop while we are in Nagoya. Mio-san, your great-niece, has been talking with Sasha for several months now. First, about wagashi, and then about our families. You don’t ever talk about your sister, and according to Mio-san, her grandmother never talks about you. Without them, I feel like there’s a part of me that’s missing.”

  “Hmmm” is all Ojiichan says.

  “So can I go? To visit Mio-san at the Matsuda Manju shop?”

  After an eternity, Ojiichan sighs. “Hai, hai.”

  Leo throws his arms around Ojiichan. Though Ojiichan winces in pain at first, he wraps an arm around Leo. With his free hand, Ojiichan gestures at me to come to him. When I sit down on the other side of his twin bed, Ojiichan pulls me into a hug too.

  “Do not lose Koty-chan,” Ojiichan says when we break away.

  Though I’m sure Ojiichan meant while we are in Japan, Leo takes my hand. “Nope. Never again.”

  EPILOGUE

  “Do not lose your passport. Either of you.” Mrs. Matsuda grabs Leo and me in a double-barreled, rib-crushing Mom Hug. When we break away, her eyes are misty. “Ah, it seems like yesterday that I was the one telling my parents goodbye and stepping onto a plane to Japan.”

  “Mom, you were gone for five years.” Leo takes pity on his mom and kisses her cheek. “I’m going for three weeks. You guys are going to be so busy that you won’t even miss me.”

  “True.” Aurora breaks out of the crowd of JCC family members sending off their high school students this morning. “Post lots of pictures so I can live vicariously through you, since I will have absolutely no life while you are gone.”

  “Now you can be Favorite Matsuda Child,” Leo teases.

  Aurora rolls her eyes. “Pass.”

  “Oi! Leo-kun! Dakota-chan!” Ojiichan yells from behind the wall of Matsudas. They part so Leo and I can take a knee in front of his grandfather’s chair.

  Ojiichan pulls a plain envelope from his light jacket’s pocket. “Please deliver this to my sister in Nagoya when you visit the manju shop. She may not accept it, but it says all I want to say. What I need to say.”

  “I will.” Leo takes the envelope. “I have a good feeling about this, Ojiichan.”

  “We will see.”

  “Mina-san!” Iwate-sensei is probably already regretting her decision to take this over-caffeinated, sleep-deprived herd of cats to Japan for the next three weeks. “Ikimashō!”

  Leo and I return to our respective families to retrieve our backpacks.

  “Thank you for coming out so early. We appreciate it,” Mom says to a trio of teen girls swarming her and Dad. “If we could have a moment of privacy as a family, then we would be happy to take a few pictures or sign autographs.”

  “Of course, I’m sorry.” The tallest girl grabs her friends by the elbows, and they shuffle off to the side as a clump. They wave at me as they pass. “Hi, Dakota!”

  I wave back. I still don’t love people so close to my bubble, but I’ll cut these girls some slack. One wears a pink tiara that matches the one currently sitting on Nevaeh’s multi-hued, space-bunned head. All three have on edamame-green T-shirts with “Matsuda” written in kanji and the new logo I designed for the restaurant. Part of me is annoyed that somebody ripped off my design and is making counterfeit T-shirts from it. Another part of me is willing to take one for the team if it means Matsuda stays busy—even with their continued limited hours—while Leo and I are gone on our first of what I hope will be many adventures together.

  Mom and Dad smother me one last time, repeating all the warnings they’ve been giving me for the last month.

  “Okay, okay, I love you guys too. I gotta go.” I can see Leo waving from the end of the security line. “See you at the end of the month. Send me pictures from Oxford and Alaska.”

  I don’t want to stop to chat with the fan girls, but I make myself do it anyway.

  “Thanks for coming out.” I take the Sharpie from the tallest girl and sign everybody’s copy of Seventeen, which has Rayne wearing an even more ridiculous tiara on the cover and an interview with me somewhere in the middle.

  After a quick selfie with the girls, I jog over to the end of the line. Leo laces his fingers through mine. The girls continue to stare at us.

  “Can we give them a little fan service?” I whisper.

  Though I can see the red creeping up from the collar of his new Kitsune Mask T-shirt, Leo looks over at the girls—with their phones out—and waves at them. The tallest one just about swoons into the floor when Leo leans in and lightly presses his lips against mine.

  “Wait!” Sasha runs up to us and shoves a little white box into my hand.

  “Thanks for giving up your summer plans for me, Sasha,” Leo says.

  “It needed to be your turn.” Sasha hugs him before backing away. “Enjoy your vacation, because Aurora and I are tagging you two back in come August first.”

  Thanks to Rayne Lee, not only is Matsuda popping, but so is Sasha’s small manju business. I rub my index finger over the gold foil printing on top of the dainty box that reads MATSUDA MANJU, PHOENIX LOCATION. While the line moves along at snail speed, I open up the box.

  “They are sooooo cute!” Two little manju bunnies sit in a nest of shredded paper, snout to snout. Two signs impale them. “I can’t read it.”

  “Kokoro no koe ni mimi o katamukete,” Leo says, pointing to the one on the right first. And then pointing to the one on the left. “Supaaku o tsukutte.”

  “Yeah, I still don’t understand.”

  “Nihongo de.” Leo lightly chastises me for not speaking in Japanese. He’s threatened to pretend like he doesn’t know me in Japan if I don’t at least attempt to put my two years of Japanese to use.

  “Wakarimasen.” I tell him I don’t understand.

  Leo turns the professionally printed tiny signs around.

  “Listen to your heart. Create a spark.” Leo gives me The Full Dimple Smile.

  “Wakarimasu.” I understand.

  Author’s Note

  I officially joined th
e Fujimura family in 1993 and have been on a cross-cultural adventure ever since. Though I never taught English in Japan like Leo’s mom, I have spent almost every summer in Japan with my kids for over fifteen years. Food is my love language, so I enjoy spending time in the kitchen with my mother-in-law and Japanese friends learning new dishes. I may struggle to conjugate verbs, but my Japanese food vocabulary is solid. I apologize in advance if you now have a sudden craving for yakisoba and manju. #SorryNotSorry

  Since this book spends a lot of time in a restaurant, you won’t be surprised to hear that my family once owned a small restaurant and that I was the lunch waitress. I got that job not based on my skill set but because my dad needed a new waitress ASAP. I am a huge fan of Japanese food—and moonlight as The Obento Lady at Arizona-based anime cons—so you can connect the dots to see how Leo Matsuda came to be. Meanwhile, Dakota was inspired by YA author friend Kara McDowell’s book Just for Clicks which is also about a teen who lives in the spotlight (fashion) and is desperately trying to figure out her reality. Mix that with my favorite HGTV show, Fixer Upper (Chip and Joanna!), and my love of historic houses, and you’ll see how the Akagi-McDonald family came to life. Though I take my research very seriously, I occasionally bend some of the facts to make my fiction flow better or as a wink to certain people in my life. For example, Akagi House is loosely based on the Petersen House in Tempe, Arizona. Be sure to look for the lovely stained-glass window in between the first and second floors.

  Finally, this one goes out to the next generation of biracial Asian teens in the US and around the globe looking to see themselves represented in more YA books. Faking Reality and my other contemporary YA books, Tanabata Wish and Every Reason We Shouldn’t, are only one specific lens on the bigger experience of being a multiracial Asian teen. You may see your family in my books. You may not. If you don’t, I encourage you to take a look at the running list I keep on my website (www.sarafujimura.com) of other YA books featuring biracial Asian main characters and/or love interests. It is still an incredibly short list. Please help me add to it, because every teen deserves to see themselves on the bookshelf.