So Wrong So Right

by Erica Marselas

  The cool breeze hits my face as I step outside to the patio of the bustling restaurant where my dad is treating us to an uber fancy reception dinner. This place has five-star meals and a dance floor with a three-piece orchestra and pianist. I have never known my dad to be so sophisticated. This was the man I grew up with that would eat what he hunted with Tamara's dad, but when he wants to he can pull out all the stops.

  It’s like he’s over spoiling me to make up for lost time or something. I hope he knows I’ll be more than happy eating at a Johnny Rocket’s or stuffing my face with ribs. My stomach grumbles and I take it as a sign my baby agrees too.

  Sitting down on one of the metal benches, I stare down at my dad's phone where my mom's contact information shines, and my shaky thumb hovers over the send button.

  The chatter from inside spills outside momentarily and then quiets. A familiar arm drapes around me and kisses my temple. “I go to the bathroom for one minute and my wife goes missing. You're supposed to run before you get to the altar, not after,” he teases.

  “No running. I figured if I was going to do this, I wanted to before I lost my nerve.” I shrug and stare at the screen that just went dark.

  “But you don't have to do it alone.”

  My head falls to his shoulder, blowing out the breath I didn't know I was holding. “I knew you would find me.”

  “Always. Now?” He points to the phone and I bite my lip nervously, turning the screen back on. “You ready? No matter what she says, it doesn’t matter, and if it gets too much, you tell me and—”

  I put my finger to his lips. “I get it, Mr. Protector. Let’s do this.” I hit the green send button and place the phone to my ear, still resting my head on Colin’s shoulder. It goes straight to voicemail and I hang up. I call again, and the same thing happens. I don't leave a message just in case Victor gets a hold of her phone somehow.

  “She's not answering,” I murmur and wrap my arms around his waist. I was hoping to get this over with now. To put it out of the way, so I had time to absorb her reply. To know if I either need to cut her from my life or find a way once Victor is completely gone to let her back in.

  This would be so much easier if I could just hate her.

  “Well, we can try later.” My eyes close, and I know he’s right. I can try after I eat that expensive meal that I ordered, that I'm sure is somehow sprinkled in gold flakes to add to the cost.

  “I guess you're right.”

  “Oh, that's nice to hear. Bet it's something I won't get to hear too often anymore.” He kisses the top of my head and I giggle at his cliché.

  “Yeah, I hope you recorded that 'cause it is probably the last.” He gives my arm a little pinch telling me we’ll see about that.

  He stands and then puts his hands out to help me up while my laughter dies down. “Let's get back inside. I want to steal a dance with my absolutely stunning wife.”

  Yes, right now I need to forget about the drama and enjoy everything I have with my new family. I’m sure my sisters—soon to be crazy aunts—think Colin and I snuck away to do the dirty. I give Tamara five seconds to confront me about it.

  “You know you don't have to butter me up? You're already getting laid.”

  “Oh, I didn’t have a doubt about that, brat.” A sly grin spreads across his face before he bends down and scoops me in his arms bridal style. I squeal and swing my arms around his neck. “What are you doing?”

  “What does it look like I’m doing Mrs. Wagner? I’m sweeping you off your feet.”

  “Oh my god, you’re so fucking corny.” I’m back to laughing. How does this man make me shut off, even for a little while?

  “Well, I have to match up to your lame lines.” He nuzzles the side of my neck and moves to carry me back inside.

  “Shut up, my lines are awesome. They hooked you.”

  I hear the snare make a Ba-dum-tsh in my head at my stupid joke

  “I rest my case.”

  Quietly, I slip out of bed, leaving my husband who is softly snoring fast asleep. I gather my robe and wrap it around myself and make my way to the couch. Between the delicious, aching throb between my legs, due to Colin fucking me within an inch of my life, and wondering why my mom went suddenly mute, I've been unable to sleep.

  I had put it aside and let myself enjoy the time with my family and friends. We danced. Laughed. Ate till our stomachs burst and then stuffed them more with cake.

  Other than having to say goodbye to my best friends for I don't know how long, the night was magical.

  The only thing that had put a small damper on the night was that my mother never did call me back. I hate how much it’s bugging me for wanting to tell her about my wedding day. I’m not even sure if it’s more to rub in her face or hoping she’ll be happy for me.

  I tried calling again before my dad left to drop off Sandy and Tamara, but instead of a voicemail, I got a message that had said her phone had been disconnected. Rational me, thought maybe it was because Victor wouldn't be able to bother her, but then why not call and tell us about the change?

  I shouldn’t be worried like this. She didn’t have this concern for me when I needed it. Yet, I find myself not being able to stop. There’s something in my gut telling me something is wrong. Seriously wrong.

  Victor is just walking around free. I’m sure he’s pissed more now about being arrested and getting handed a restraining order. I personally don’t think any of us are safe from the devil and I’m left with only questions, wondering what is going to happen next.

  My dad had promised he would stop by her place to check, but I never heard back because I let Colin sweep me off my feet again and forgot everything around me, including my name at one point, as we consummated our marriage.

  It’s a bit before seven and I know my dad is already at work, hammering away. Picking up the hotel phone, I dial my dad’s number and realize I need to buy a new cell phone. I didn’t notice how naked I felt without it the last couple days till yesterday and I had to use everyone else’s phone.

  His line rings once before he answers with a rough, “John Miller.”

  “Morning, Daddy.”

  “Abigail? What are you doing awake? It’s not even seven.”

  “I couldn't sleep and wanted to know if you saw Mom last night?”

  He sighs. “I didn't. When I got there, her car was gone and there was no answer. I asked your neighbor and they said she left sometime in the afternoon, so maybe she just went to get away for awhile.”

  “But she has to have seen we called. You'd think she would call to make sure everything is fine? What if something is wrong with her?” My voice rises, in a panic, not sure how he’s keeping so calm. There’s something wrong.

  “Abbs, stop. You need to stop getting worked up about the ‘what ifs.’ I'll have William check on her, but right now you can't get yourself worked up.”

  “I'm tired of hearing that,” I snap, which ends up startling Colin who stirs. His eyes blink open slowly as they adjust to the room and he spots me on the couch. “There's too many things that could be happening. I'm worried about her.”

  “And it's okay to be worried, pumpkin, but you can't get yourself all excited. I will text you if your mom calls or if William checks on the house. Now, go enjoy your day and I will see you tonight. I love you, Abby.”

  “I love you too,” I mumble, knowing I'm still without any answers or feeling better. We say our goodbyes and I run my hands down my face, feeling at a loss. Part of me wants to go check, but an even bigger part of me knows I can never step foot anywhere near New Castle again. Especially that house.

  This blows.

  Colin plops down next to me. He's put on his boxers and his hair is a chaotic mess on top of his head. I move and curl into his lap, wanting to hear his heartbeat and be in the security of his arms.

  “What are you doing awake?” He brushes back my hair and presses his warm lips to my temple.

  “Mom.”

  “Oh? Still nothin
g?”

  “No. She wasn’t home last night. Why am I so worried? Like I’m so twisted up inside thinking the worst is going on and I know I shouldn’t be. I should hate her. I should fucking hate her.” I pound my fist into his chest and cry. “She left me with him. If I didn’t barf on him—” The words lodge in my throat and I can’t push them out.

  “Shh, baby, stop.” Colin rocks me, doing his best to soothe me, but the tears come down like rain. I keep pushing what happened aside, wanting to forget about it, but now, with what's going on with my mom, it's all pushed forward again.

  “I’m so mad,” I growl and cry harder. “She didn’t protect me. You did. But I don’t know if I can blame her either because it’s all Victor’s fault. He took her from me and I just want her back now. I want her to be safe like I am. I also hate that I want to forgive her, but I don’t want to hate her either.”

  Colin lifts my head and wipes away the still falling tears from my face. “I understand. I felt the same with my mom for the longest time. Sure, it’s a bit different, but I went back and forth a lot. I think it’s too soon for you to have to decide what to do.”

  “I just need to know she's okay to get rid of this odd feeling of dread something big is going to happen,” I mutter and burying myself deeper into him, trying to calm myself.

  “I know. I do too, baby.”

  We both sit in silence as my tears cease. Would it be wrong to pray for a man’s death? Everyone seems to be out for his blood anyways, and it’s not like the law is on our side keeping him locked up where he should be.

  “I want to go to Paris,” I blurt out, without much thinking about it. The idea has been freaking me out since Thursday, but now I see it’s the only way to get peace. By running away.

  “You do?” he says, uncertain, with an eyebrow cocked, and his hand falls from my face.

  “It’s the only way to break free from wondering if Victor is always going to do something. You said it yourself you don’t trust him and with my mom having him arrested, I guess it freaks me out that he could be angrier. Maybe it’s just in both of our minds that we think he would even care that much to do something. But I don't think we will have that peace till we are far away and one hundred percent safe from him. I'll miss my dad, my friends, Mom, but Skype was invented for a reason and I'm tired of living thinking some kind of doom is coming.”

  “Abbs.” Colin sighs and runs his hands through his messy hair.

  “It was your idea,” I utter in disbelief, wondering how now we switched teams on the issue.

  “I know, but I also said we didn’t have to go there. After seeing you with your friends, you’re going to want them nearby. At least if you stay in the states, it would be easier for them to come to you.”

  “But then I will wonder if Victor is always coming to get us. I need to worry about our baby too and keeping them safe. We couldn’t save ourselves, but we can save him or her from knowing his evil.” My hand drops to my belly. “I can get my GED before we go and I think it’s what I want.”

  “See, you think. We still have time, Abbs. We have a lot to do before we could go. I’ve been looking into it more and since you’re only sixteen that makes things a bit more complicated, even with being married. And to get your citizenship we will have to be married for at least four years and one of those years you won’t be able to leave the country.”

  “Oh,” I gulp, I didn’t think of any of that.

  “I told you, Abbs, it was all on the whim. It’s easy for me, but not as easy for you. I want to get away as much as you do, but I want you to be certain. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I say resigned, and Colin cups my chin to kiss me.

  “Maybe in a couple of weeks, we can go somewhere. A small honeymoon because, even if we don’t move to Paris, I want to take you there.”

  “I would like that. Maybe it will help with my decision.” I giggle, knowing I need to stop changing my mind.

  “Good. Now that that is settled you think you can clear your mind for a bit and come back to bed?” he says seductively, playing with the sash on my robe.

  “I think so? I am kind of tired.” I stretch my arms over my head and yawn dramatically. Colin opens my robe and brushes his thumbs along my nipples.

  “There will be no sleeping, baby. I’m going to numb your mind and kiss away your troubles, just like I did last night. At least I know I can do that right.”

  A hand shakes my shoulder, and I vaguely hear my name being called as I drift out of dream world. My eyes peel open to the bright room at my dad's. Colin and I moved in here two nights ago. I groan, wanting to go back to sleep.

  “Abigail, wake up, pumpkin,” my dad's voice coos, the smell of his aftershave fills my nose and for the first time lately, it doesn't make me sick.

  “Dad? What's wrong?” My voice croaks, and I rub my eyes trying to wake myself.

  I glance to the other side of the bed and notice my husband missing. Colin rarely ever leaves the bed before I get up, so I'm crazy confused about where he ran off to and why my dad is here.

  Thankfully, I put my pj’s on last night.

  “You need to get up and come downstairs, so we can talk, honey.”

  “Talk?” The worry and urgency in his voice make me shoot up in bed. I’m wide awake now and my hands are clammy as panic surges through me, especially since Colin is not here. “Did something happen? Colin? Is he okay?”

  “Something did happen, but he’s okay. He just went out for a run to clear his head. But he'll be back.”

  “What, what, what?” My head shakes, and I swear maybe I'm still dreaming because he's lost me. “Clear his head? Dad, you're not making any sense? What's going on?”

  I'm trying to get a read on his face and except for the magical appearance of some worried lines on his forehead, he’s giving me nothing.

  “I'll explain everything when you come down.” He turns on his heel and leaves my room, shutting the door.

  I rush out of my bed like it’s on fire and go to the bathroom, realizing my bladder is full. Once my hands are clean I run downstairs, needing to know what the fuck happened.

  I make it to the living room where Dad and Naomi are whispering to each other. “I'm here,” I announce, drawing their attention. Colin is still nowhere to be seen.

  Naomi walks over and grabs my hand. She has deep worry wrinkles on her face that match my fathers and she looks forlorn. “You should sit down, Abbs.”

  Feeling in a daze of alarm and absolute 'what the fuck' confusion, I let her lead me over to the couch. “What's going on?” I settle into the couch. Naomi sits next to me and my dad sits on the coffee table.

  “Early this morning, Colin was in the kitchen with me when I got a call from William. Which was followed by one from the hospital.” He sighs and rubs his hands on his pants. “There was an incident yesterday afternoon. Victor attacked your mother in a drunken rage. I'm not sure of all the details right now, but he hurt her pretty bad.”

  My elbows fall to my knees and my hands cover my mouth in shock. “Oh my god.”

  I haven't heard anything from her since Friday. She never called after the wedding and William couldn't locate her, but they knew Victor's whereabouts and they weren't together. So, I just had to believe she was safe, but I could still feel something was off.

  I should've listened to my gut.

  “She's in the hospital. She's conscious, and said she was doing okay.”

  “Okay? So, has Victor been caught? Please tell me he’s been caught.” My voice shakes, and my legs bounce up and down, worried if he hasn’t been locked in a cell he could be coming for me and Colin. And even if he is, will he get out just to do it again?

  “See, that’s where things get a little more complicated.” My heart rate spikes, as my dad brushes his hands through his hair. His eyes glance to Naomi and she scoots closer to me as if she’s ready to grab me from passing out or freaking the fuck out.

  “Complicated?” I choke and if he doesn’t spill now
I’m going to go insane. “Tell me.”

  With a heavy sigh, he moves himself and the coffee table closer to me. “In the midst of your mother’s attack, she fought back and was able to get the upper hand. She ended up killing him, Abby.”

  “She wha? No…she—Oh my god,” I rattle on, not even sure what to think. Everything in my mind is spinning around like a gravitron, but one thing that yells clearly is Victor is dead.

  I won’t let him near you again. My mom’s words echo through my head, knowing she kept her promise, but I didn’t expect it to come to this.

  As I absorb Victor’s death, my thoughts race to my husband who is still missing. “Colin? This—this is why he needed to clear his head. How did he take it?”

  Naomi squeezes my hand, her eyes trying to reassure me. “When he left I think he was still in a state of shock. Even if he hated his dad—”

  “No, I get it,” I say, cutting her off. “It's his dad. If he didn't care about him in some way, he wouldn't be as affected by his words or actions. I know…we've sorta talked about it.”

  And if I know him as well as I do, he's more than likely mad he wasn't the one to do it. But I won't share that.

  “Yes. I'm sure when he gets back he'll be ready to talk. But I’m worried about you, pumpkin.”

  My mind is still reeling, making me dizzy, that I'm not even sure how to take this information in or what to do with it. I feel—blank. “I don't know how to react, to be honest. He's gone, and I feel relieved in a way, but then there's Mom…I mean, what’s happening to her? Is she in trouble?” I don’t want them taking her away, especially when she did the world and mankind a huge favor.

  “They're not holding her. It seems the incident happened outside the house and the neighbors saw. So, the cops and the DA had enough evidence to rule it as self-defense.”

  “God,” I whisper and push my hands through my hair. My mom is safe while I’m still in a mind fuck because I'm not sure what to do.

  “I know this is a lot to digest, Abby.” My dad pats my knee and I pop my head up to look at him. “You don't have to say or do anything right now. “