Nobody’s Darling

by Nobody’s Darling (retail) (epub)

  It suddenly occurred to her that something was wrong, however. Ruby was very still and seemed shocked, making Lizzie ask angrily, ‘The buggers ain’t short-changed yer, have they?’

  At this Ted sat up and looked from one to the other. If Ruby had been short-changed, he would have something to say and that was a fact. Certainly her face was drained of colour, as though she’d suffered a shock. ‘Is that what they’ve done, lass?’ he asked in a kindly voice. A situation like this called for restraint, while Lizzie tended to over-react.

  ‘See for yourself.’ Leaning forward, Ruby gave the two documents to her dad. The letter was on top, and he proceeded to read aloud:

  Dear Ruby,

  Both my daughter and I have valued your time here with us, and I particularly regret the circumstances under which you left this employ.

  Sadly, I have been unable to persuade Cicely to change her mind about letting you go. Nevertheless, I would like to thank you for your loyalty and dedication.

  To this end, I have enclosed a money draft, which constitutes a fair settlement. Take it along to Messrs. Armstrong and Leyton, at 14 Ainsworth Street. They are already informed and will honour it on receipt.

  Meanwhile, I do know how difficult it is to secure employment at the present time. These wages in lieu will tide you over until something comes along. It is the least I can do.

  Should you need references, please do not hesitate to contact me at once.

  Yours sincerely

  Jeffrey Banks, Esq.

  Ted raised his eyes. They were round and vivid in his chalk grey face. Good God above, lass!’ he exclaimed in a strange voice. ‘It’s a small fortune.’

  Lizzie could contain herself no longer. ‘Let me see that.’ Taking the letter from him, she proceeded to read it with great difficulty. Presently she cast her eyes over the enclosed draft and what she saw there made her gasp aloud. ‘Fifty guineas!’ In an instant she was on her feet, her brown eyes blazing as she instructed Ruby, ‘Yer not to take it!’

  Ted interrupted. ‘Don’t talk daft, woman. Of course she’ll take it. The lass has earned every penny. Why shouldn’t she have that money, eh?’

  Lizzie turned on him then. ‘Because it’s gentry money, that’s why. And I don’t want no charity from gentry coming into this house.’

  Ted was also on his feet now, and staring at her in a curious fashion. ‘What’s wrong with you, lass, eh?’ he wanted to know. ‘Why have you got such a bee in your bonnet with regard to the gentry? And in particular Jeffrey Banks? Has he ever done you any harm?’ When Lizzie hesitated he insisted impatiently, ‘Well, has he?’

  In her mind’s eye, Lizzie could see herself and Jeffrey in that fancy bed, both of them stark naked, he on top of her and she with her arms clasping him close. Looking at her husband’s face now, she trembled inside. ‘No, he’s never done me any harm,’ she answered in a subdued voice, praying that he didn’t already suspect.

  ‘Well then. If you don’t want the lass to change this draft, you’ll need to give me a good enough reason. So if you’ve got one, you’d best get it off your chest right now.’ He stood his ground, his eyes boring into her face.

  Lizzie was growing more and more uncomfortable. He had her cornered and there was something in his manner that troubled her.

  ‘I suppose if you say it’s all right, then who am I to argue?’ she reluctantly conceded. ‘It’s just that – well, it does seem such a great sum of money.’

  Ted appeared satisfied. ‘Stuff and nonsense! It happens all the time amongst the gentry. It’s what they call a parting gift.

  ‘Aye, but we’re not gentry,’ Lizzie solemnly reminded him.

  Ted merely nodded, giving both the letter and the draft back to Ruby. ‘What will you do with it, lass?’ he asked.

  ‘I’ll share it with you and Mam, of course,’ she said without hesitation.

  He shook his head. ‘No, lass. It’s your money and you’ve earned it. Me and your mam are managing fine. I dare say there’ll come a day when you’re ready to take a husband and you’ll be glad of that money then. Put it away safe and sound.’ He gave a loud noisy sigh that seemed to lift him off his feet. ‘By! I ain’t never seen that much money all at one time, and that’s for sure. He chuckled. ‘Happen I should get myself a job as lady’s maid, eh?’

  He then settled back into his chair and fell asleep, every now and then shaking his head as though dreaming of the impossible.

  ‘I’ll send it back if you like, Mam.’ Ruby hated it when her parents had harsh words.

  Lizzie shook her head. ‘Yer dad says yer to have it, so have it yer must.’ She took a long hard look at her daughter. More and more she could see Jeffrey Banks in her. ‘What will yer do with it lass?’

  While her mam and dad had been arguing, Ruby had been thinking ahead. She had already decided to follow their advice and put it away for a nest egg – but it wouldn’t be for a wedding. Oh, no! That money, and every penny she saved herself, was towards her dream. She already had forty shilling put by, which seemed meagre when set against fifty guineas. She had seen her dream taking years and years, but now it was so much closer she could almost taste it. Uppermost in her mind was a thought that excited her so much she could hardly keep still. Suddenly she saw how to make that money work, and it had to do with the milliner’s shop. But she would have to talk with Widow Reece before taking too much for granted. And she would do that first thing in the morning, straight after she had drawn on that money draft. First though, she had to be sure that her mam and dad were all right. ‘Mam, do you mind what I do with this money? she wanted to know. ‘Was Dad right when he said you were managing fine?’

  ‘If yer dad said that, then it must be right.’ Lizzie could almost see Ruby’s mind ticking over. ‘All the same, I hope yer don’t do nothing foolish with that there money.’

  Overwhelmed with everything that had happened, and deeply moved by the anxious look on Lizzie’s face, Ruby went to her mam and flung her arms round her. ‘Oh, Mam, you mustn’t worry about me. I’m not about to do anything silly.’

  ‘I hope not, lass. All this talk of being rich and wanting the moon – well, it does upset me, I’ll not deny it.’ She clung to Ruby as though she had never held her before. ‘I love yer, lass, and I don’t want to lose yer.’

  ‘Aw, Mam. How could you ever lose me?’ Ruby looked into her mam’s worried brown eyes and hugged her. ‘You mean the world to me,’ she murmured. For a while they were content in each other’s embrace; Lizzie sorely troubled by the thought of what that money could take from her and Ruby greatly excited by what it could bring.

  Presently, Lizzie pushed her daughter away. She also had an idea. Like Ruby, she was planning an errand in the morning. But it was a very different errand from Ruby’s. ‘Go on then, lass,’ she said, ‘I know you’re itching to tell yon Maureen about yer good news.’

  ‘There isn’t much you don’t know about me, is there, Mam?’ Ruby remarked with a warm smile, thinking it was just as well her mam couldn’t read thoughts, or she’d explode if she knew what her daughter was planning to ask Widow Reece in the morning. ‘I shan’t be long,’ she promised.

  ‘Yer wrong, lass,’ Lizzie murmured to herself as Ruby left. ‘There’s a great deal I don’t know about yer, and worse still there’s a deal yer don’t know about yer mam, God forgive her.’ And she sat in the chair, letting the tears fall down her face. The night grew dark outside, and she lit another candle.

  Ted slept on, his gentle snores echoing round the tiny parlour. And while he slept, Lizzie made her plans. Tomorrow, she would ask Ma Collins to take care of the bairn while she herself took the tram out to Billenge. From there she would go to Jeffrey Banks’s house where once and for all she would get to the bottom of why he had sent such a great amount of money to someone who was only a lady’s maid. If her suspicions were unfounded then she would keep her peace of mind, but if he was a threat she had to know.

  She felt unnerved, excited and angry all at the
same time. And to her great surprise, she found herself trembling at the thought of seeing him again. She felt like a foolish young girl when, of a sudden, she began wondering what she should wear. Happen that new frock she’d just finished, in preparation for the likely event of Ruby and Johnny getting wed. ‘Aye. Happen I’ll wear my best frock,’ she murmured into the gloom. After all, she ought to look her best because, when all was said and done, a woman had her pride.

  * * *

  ‘Is your mam in?’ Ruby followed Johnny into the parlour. There was an oil lamp lit in the centre of the table, and a small fire burning in the grate. The room was bathed in a soft romantic glow. As Johnny turned to gaze on her, Ruby’s heart nearly stopped. Those dark eyes seemed to reach right into her soul. ‘It’s just that I’d like a word with her before I go up to see Maureen, she explained.

  In the half light, with his shirt open to his chest and his sleeves rolled up over strong brown arms, Johnny was unnervingly handsome. His brooding gaze fell on her and made her shiver to the tips of her toes. Disturbed, she glanced around the room. ‘Upstairs, is she?’ she asked, her voice firm and clear, belying the tumult inside her.

  Johnny shook his head. ‘They’re out,’ he murmured. And we’re alone.’ His hand touched her shoulder, sending shivers down her spine. ‘Will you stay?’ When she slightly turned, he thought it might be to leave. ‘Just to talk,’ he promised.

  As always when she was near him, Ruby wanted to run. At the same time she desperately wanted to stay. ‘For a while,’ she said. ‘What time will they be back?’ She thought it strange that Maureen should be out so late.

  ‘They won’t be back tonight. They’re gone to Bolton for a couple of days, to stay with an old friend of my mother. Mrs Williams is a kindly soul, retired from nursing now. Mam asked the doctor whether it would be all right for her to take Maureen away for a couple of days, and he thought it would do more good than harm. I mentioned it to Thomas, and he spoke to Mr Arnold who insisted that I should take them to Bolton in his own carriage.’ He smiled with pleasure at the memory. ‘They were that thrilled, anyone would have thought they’d been given the crown jewels.’ Cupping his hand beneath her elbow, he said, ‘Sit yourself down, Ruby, while I get us a drink. Then we can talk.’ He walked her to the armchair, and when she was seated, left her for a while during which time she could hear him opening and shutting cupboards in the front parlour. In a surprisingly short time he was back, holding two glasses and a bottle of home-made wine.

  ‘One of my mother’s latent talents,’ he laughed. ‘She hasn’t made wine since our Maureen’s illness. If Dad had known this was hiding in there, it would have been long gone.’ He took out the cork and sniffed it. ‘Smells all right,’ he told her, pouring a small measure of the dark liquid into each of the glasses. Seating himself in the chair opposite, he asked, ‘What do you think to it?’

  Raising the glass to her lips, Ruby took a tiny sip. Warmth spread through her like a gentle tide. ‘It’s very pleasant,’ she confessed. Everything was pleasant. Being here all alone with Johnny, the coziness of this tiny parlour and the cheery glow from the fire sending lazy shadows round the walls, the way it warmed her through and flickered over his straight strong features, creating sunshine and shadows in that marvellous face. There was a certain danger here, but even that was strangely reassuring. As she reached out to place her glass on the table, she was acutely aware of his dark eyes following her every move.

  ‘I planned to call round later and tell you that Maureen was away for a while,’ he said softly. His smile turned her heart over. ‘I’m so glad you came here tonight.’

  Suddenly, Ruby was unsure. ‘I wouldn’t have if I’d known Maureen wasn’t here.’

  ‘Are you sure?’

  It isn’t right… you and me being here alone.’ All kinds of images invaded her mind and she found herself trembling ‘I’d better go.’ She stood up.

  He walked with her to the door. ‘Must you, Ruby?’ he asked. His voice was low and resonant, sapping her will. ‘Won’t you stay? He was behind her now, his hands gripping her shoulders. She visibly shivered when he bent his head to her neck and kissed the exposed flesh there. ‘I love you so,’ he murmured. Slowly, he turned her round, passion alight in those dark eyes as they fixed on her upturned face. ‘Stay with me,’ he whispered.

  In the firelight glow, Ruby was more radiant than he had ever seen her. She was an enigma to him; she had the look of a child yet exuded the fire and passion of a woman. Her perfect lovely face was like a pale jewel set in that wonderful spill of rich brown hair. It tumbled about her face and curled at the nape of her neck, glinting in the dancing firelight. ‘Don’t go, my lovely,’ he murmured.

  For one heart-stopping moment, he feared she would run away. But then he saw her eyes soften, and was encouraged. Gathering her into his arms, he pulled her close, kissing her full on the mouth and groaning deep inside himself when he felt her tremble.

  She wanted to push him away, but here in his embrace she was safe and warm. Yet not content. Never content. All the same, when she was with him she didn’t need to be anyone other than who she was: Ruby Miller from Fisher Street… Lizzie’s lass. It was so easy, so straightforward. Life could be wonderfully simple. With Johnny, there was no awful urgency to raise herself in the eyes of the world. This wonderful man loved her, and that should be enough.

  But it wasn’t! ‘I’d better leave.’ Her small empty voice said one thing, her heart said another. His arms became loose about her. For one agonising moment their eyes met, his burning dark, hers looking up, beseeching him to understand. Suddenly she was caught to his chest, his arms like steel bands round her. Never in her life had she felt such fierce and all-consuming emotions. There was a need in her, a desperate longing that shook her to the roots.

  Gently, he swept her up in his arms and carried her away. She didn’t resist. Her passion was as fierce as his own. When he laid her on the rug before the fire and knelt between her legs, she slid her hands beneath the neck of his shirt, her fingers stroking the short thick hairs that covered his chest. The glow from the fire bathed and caressed them. She felt somehow distanced from it all. His hands ran over her, so tender, yet so fierce. When he stood before her, naked and magnificent, she was both ashamed and exhilarated. There was an animal beauty about him, a magnetism that made her gasp aloud.

  It seemed like a lifetime but it was only a heartbeat before she too had stripped away the last garment. In their nakedness they blended one into the other. His mouth was warm and soft against hers, his whole body covering her, swallowing her into himself. The fresh warm smell of him permeated her senses. His skin pulsed firm and smooth against her mouth, and his hair teased her face. As she writhed beneath him, he moved his strong hands to the curve of her back, pulling her up towards him. In that glorious moment when he entered her, she uttered his name. The way she looked at him told him everything he needed to know.

  He stilled the murmur with the most gentle of kisses. Willingly she arched into him, her blood fired by a shocking want. His deep and rhythmic movements inside her were immensely satisfying. She pushed with him, his mouth was on her neck, on her face. Half-open lips, moist and probing, found her every nerve ending.

  The gentle movement grew frantic. His trembling tongue played on her nipple, making it stiffen in his mouth. Again and again he penetrated deep inside her. The ecstasy was unbearable. Thrills rippled through her body, causing her to cry out softly. He held her tight, tighter still, his arms closing round her slim form binding their two bodies together. The heat from the fire was excruciating. The sweat gathered in tiny droplets on his nakedness, dripping on to her and settling in the pores of her own skin. She could feel his heart beating madly, at one with her own.

  In his climactic fever she felt him lock into her. Her senses rose and fell in a glorious ebbing tide. Suddenly, it was over and he was holding her, rocking her like a mother might rock a child. Spent and fulfilled, she ached with love for him.


  Silence settled over them. She was aware of his kisses, astonished that the love had not died with the passion. Her heart was overwhelmed with joy, and wonder, and pain. Softly, she disentangled herself and began to dress.

  ‘Marry me, Ruby,’ he murmured. When she turned away he put on his clothes and came to her. ‘Surely to God you can’t deny our love now?’ He was uncertain again. She always managed to do that to him. Even though he had held her as close as any man could hold a woman, she still eluded him; that precious essence that was Ruby stayed hidden from him. And he didn’t know how to cope with that.

  ‘I have to go,’ she said. She could not bring herself to look on him then.

  ‘Didn’t it mean anything to you?’ There was disbelief in his voice, but not arrogance. He loved her too much for that.

  She looked at him then, a sad look that sent his heart to his boots. For a long dreadful moment she lowered her gaze to the floor, searching for the right words and hating herself because she knew she must hurt him. ‘I’m sorry, Johnny,’ she whispered. The firelight lit the agony in her eyes. ‘What happened just now – it can’t ever happen again.’

  ‘What are you saying, Ruby? That you don’t love me. Is that it?’

  She answered truthfully, ‘No, I’m not saying that.’

  ‘Then what are you saying, for God’s sake?’

  ‘I’m not for you, Johnny. I never will be.’ The things she had to say would hurt her as much as they would hurt him, but she had to say them. ‘All my life I’ve wanted something better than Fisher Street, better than a husband who works from dawn to dusk and half a dozen children who will never know what it’s like to live in comfort, or have enough on the table to eat… going to school in hand-me-downs, and being laughed at by the better off.

  ‘But it doesn’t have to be like that, sweetheart!’

  ‘Yes, it does!’ The tears spilled over her thick dark lashes, running down her face like silver threads in the half-light. ‘I’ve been there. I know what it’s like, and I’ve hated every minute. I’ve seen my mam and dad wrung with despair because of poverty. I’ve hidden behind the sofa with our mam, when the rentman’s been at the door, both of us crouched out of sight, on our knees, because she hadn’t got the money to pay him. When our dad was out of work we all went hungry, and even now, young Lottie still hasn’t got a decent cot. So don’t you tell me it doesn’t have to be like that, because I know it does. And I won’t live like it. I won’t!’ The tears flowed and she was sobbing loudly now. Distraught, he made a move towards her.