Jaffle Inc

by Heide Goody

  ***

  Chapter 34

  A NOTIFICATION WAKES THE UNIT.

  THE UNIT LEAVES THE APARTMENT BUILDING AND WALKS TO JAFFLE TECH’S OFFICES IN JAFFLE PARK. IT IS A PLACE OF WORK.

  THE UNIT DOES NOT GO TO THE BUILDING. THE UNIT IS INTERCEPTED BY A SUPERVISOR AND GIVEN AN OBJECT.

  THE OBJECT IS A BROOM.

  THE UNIT PUSHES THE BROOM ALONG PATHWAYS, STEPPING ASIDE TO AVOID OBSTACLES. THERE ARE BOTS ON THE PATHS AS WELL. SOME OF THE BOTS CONTAIN SECURITY SENSORS. SOME OF THE BOTS CARRY OUT CLEANING DUTIES.

  THE BOTS CLEAN. THE UNIT CLEANS. IT IS A PLACE OF WORK.

  AN INDIVIDUAL IN A TUNIC WALKS PAST THE UNIT.

  “YOU MISSED A BIT,” INDIVIDUAL IN A TUNIC SAYS AND THEN WALKS AWAY, LAUGHING.

  THE UNIT LOOKS FOR THE BIT THAT WAS MISSED.

  LATER – TIME IS NOT SOMETHING THE UNIT MEASURES – A LINE OF UNITS LEAVE THE PLACE OF WORK. THE WORK IS COMPLETE. THE UNITS RESPOND TO SEPARATE SIGNALS BUT THEY MOVE AS A GROUP AS THEY WALK DOWN THE STREET. THE UNIT’S GAZE IS DOWNWARDS. THE UNIT AVOIDS OBSTACLES. THERE IS NO NEED TO INTERACT WITH THE GREY WIDER WORLD.

  CARS AVOID THE UNITS. HUMAN INDIVIDUALS AVOID THE UNITS. HUMANS KEEP AS MUCH DISTANCE FROM THE UNITS AS POSSIBLE. THE UNITS FALL IN STEP WITH ONE ANOTHER. THEY ARE NOT THE SAME BUT THEY CONGREGATE. THEY RESPOND TO SEPARATE SIGNALS BUT THEY MOVE AS A GROUP.

  LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT.

  “Swim with your friends, look at them all at your side. Be like a whale! Beeeee like a whaaaaale!” SINGS THE WHALE.

  THE WHALE IS BLUE. THE WORLD IS GREY.

  “It’s fuuun being aaaa whaaaaale.”

  THE UNIT STOPS OUTSIDE THE APARTMENT BLOCK. THE UNIT STANDS AT THE ROADSIDE UNTIL IT IS TIME TO EAT FOOD STUFF. THE UNIT CHEWS AND SWALLOWS. IT SUFFICES.

  THE INDIVIDUAL COMES OUTSIDE AND TAKES THE UNIT BY THE HAND.

  “COME INSIDE, ALICE. YOU’LL GET COLD OUT HERE.”

  THE INDIVIDUAL LEADS THE UNIT INSIDE. HE SITS THE UNIT DOWN ON THE YIELDING NOT SOLID OBJECT. THE INDIVIDUAL PRESENTS A SERIES OF THINGS TO HER MOUTH AGAIN.

  “BACON? PIZZA? GLASS OF SHERRY?” THE INDIVIDUAL MAKES A SOUND – IT SOUNDS LIKE LAUGHTER BUT IT ALSO SOUNDS LIKE A NOISE OF DISTRESS. THE UNIT DOES NOT RECOGNISE IT SO DOES NOT RESPOND TO IT.

  THE INDIVIDUAL SIGHS AND PACES THE FLOOR.

  “I FETCHED ALL OF YOUR STUFF, AND HATTIE’S TOO. IT’S HIDDEN SAFE FOR WHEN YOU NEED IT AGAIN. I CAN’T BEAR THE WAY THEY’RE TREATING YOU. I KNOW YOU ALWAYS WORRIED ABOUT EVERYONE THAT’S TREATED THIS WAY. I GUESS I CLOSED MY EYES TO IT. BUT ANYWAY, THAT WAS BEFORE YOU WERE ONE OF THEM. NOW I CAN’T BEAR IT. I CAN’T BEAR IT BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE REALLY LIKE, AND I FIND MYSELF WONDERING IF ALL THESE OTHER PEOPLE ARE AMAZING AS WELL, BUT YOU’D NEVER KNOW IT. JEEZ, I’M RAMBLING.”

  THE INDIVIDUAL THROWS HIMSELF NOISILY INTO A SEATING POSITION. THE UNIT INSTINCTIVELY DRAWS BACK.

  “ANYWAY, I’VE BEEN TALKING TO SOME FRIENDS. I HAD AN IDEA ABOUT HACKING YOUR PORT. IF I CAN GET IT WORKING, IT MIGHT BE SOMETHING THAT SCALES UP. I COULD BROADCAST IT, USE IT ON OTHER EMPTIES. I KNOW YOU’D APPROVE OF THAT. WE’VE ONLY GOT TWO DAYS UNTIL OPERATION SUNRISE.”

  THERE IS A NOTIFICATION. THE UNIT LIES DOWN TO SLEEP.

  ***

  Chapter 35

  A NOTIFICATION WAKES THE UNIT.

  THE UNIT WALKS TO JAFFLE TECH’S OFFICES IN JAFFLE PARK.

  BEFORE THE UNIT REACHES JAFFLE PARK, THE UNIT IS INTERCEPTED BY AN INDIVIDUAL IN CLOTHES THAT ARE NOT COVERALLS.

  THE INDIVIDUAL GRABS THE UNIT’S SHOULDERS AND TWIRLS HER BODILY AROUND.

  “LOOK WHO IT IS! OH DARLING, YOU LOOK SO MUCH BETTER IN THOSE COVERALLS! YOU MUST TELL ME WHERE YOU GOT THEM FROM. NOW, I KNOW YOU APPRECIATE THE FINER THINGS IN LIFE, ALICE, SO HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN ME IN A TOAST TO YOUR NEW STATUS? GLASS OF WINE PERHAPS, OR A FINE SCOTCH?”

  THE UNIT WALKS ON.

  “DO STOP BY AGAIN! WE CAN DISCUSS ALL OF THE FUN THINGS YOU’RE DOING WITH YOUR TIME, ALICE! PERHAPS WE COULD DO LUNCH, HMM?”

  THE INDIVIDUAL IN CLOTHES THAT ARE NOT COVERALLS TRILLS WITH LAUGHTER AND WALKS BACK UP THE PATH TOWARDS A BUILDING. THE CLOTHES THAT ARE NOT COVERALLS FLOAT AROUND HER LEGS.

  AT JAFFLE PARK, THE UNIT IS INTERCEPTED BY A SUPERVISOR AND GIVEN A BROOM.

  THE UNIT PUSHES THE BROOM ALONG PATHWAYS, STEPPING ASIDE TO AVOID OBSTACLES.

  THERE IS SOMETHING ON THE PATH THAT ISN’T FOR SWEEPING. THE UNIT CANNOT FIT THE BROOM AROUND THE SIDE. THE SOMETHING ON THE PATH MOVES WHEN THE UNIT MOVES THE BROOM. THE SOMETHING ON THE PATH IS SMALL AND COVERED IN FUR. IT HAS A TINY TWITCHING NOSE.

  THE UNIT DOES NOT POSSESS THE PROBLEM-SOLVING CAPABILITY TO RESOLVE THE ISSUE. THE UNIT STANDS STILL, UNABLE TO PROCEED. SOMEONE APPROACHES, AN INDIVIDUAL IN A SECURITY UNIFORM.

  “IT’S OKAY. IT’S OKAY. I’LL DEAL WITH THIS PESKY VARMINT.”

  THE SECURITY GUARD HAS A PLASTIC BOX TUCKED UNDER HIS ARM. HE BENDS AND SCOOPS UP THE SOMETHING – THE ‘PESKY VARMINT’ – INTO THE PLASTIC BOX.

  “I DON’T STOMP ON MICE,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD. “NOT REALLY. I’LL TAKE CARE OF IT, YABETCHA.”

  THE SECURITY GUARD TAKES THE UNIT’S ARM.

  “COME WITH ME.”

  THE SECURITY GUARD LEADS THE UNIT INTO THE BUILDING.

  “YOU CAN LEAVE THE BROOM THERE. IT WILL BE THERE WHEN YOU GET BACK.”

  THE SECURITY GUARD AND THE UNIT GO DOWN TO A BASEMENT LEVEL. THE SECURITY GUARD TAKES THE UNIT TO A SPACE WITH SEVERAL ROOMS. THIS ROOM CONTAINS A DESK, A TABLE AND SOME CHAIRS. THE TABLE HAS A CLOTH ON IT, A POT OF HOT LIQUID AND SOME FOOD STUFF. THE ITEMS OF FOOD STUFF ARE ROUND AND DOUGHY AND HAVE HOLES IN THE MIDDLE. ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL IS THERE, SITTING ON A CHAIR NEXT TO THE TABLE. THIS INDIVIDUAL WEARS A SUPPORT WORKER’S TUNIC. THE SECURITY SITS THE UNIT ON A CHAIR NEXT TO THE SUPPORT WORKER.

  “LOOK AT YOU TWO,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD. “HATTIE AND ALICE. OL’ PALS BACK TOGETHER AGAIN.”

  THE UNIT HAS BEEN SAT DOWN.

  “I’LL PUT THIS LI’L FELLA IN A CAGE WITH THE OTHERS,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD AND TURNS TO A FAR WALL. HE MOVES A CONCEALING PANEL BOARD ASIDE AND REVEALS CAGES ON THE SHELVES, WITH LOTS OF OTHER ‘PESKY VARMINTS’ INSIDE. MANY OF THE CAGES CONNECT TO ONE ANOTHER, GIVING THE VARMINTS FREEDOM TO MOVE FROM ONE TO THE OTHER. THE SECURITY GUARD PUTS THE VARMINT INTO A CAGE, PROVIDES IT WITH FOOD STUFF AND WATER THEN GENTLY SHUTS THE DOOR.

  THE SECURITY GUARD COMES BACK TO THE TABLE, POURS HOT LIQUID INTO A MUG AND SITS DOWN, REACHING FOR A ROUND FOOD STUFF.

  “HOO-WEE. THINGS ARE MESSED UP,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD. “YOU SEE ALL THESE MICE?”

  THE UNIT DOES NOT RESPOND. THE INDIVIDUAL IN THE TUNIC DOES NOT RESPOND. THE INDIVIDUAL IN THE TUNIC IS NOT A UNIT BUT THERE IS A SIMILARITY.

  “WE’RE LIVING IN A WORLD WHERE MICE ARE AN UNEXPECTED ANOMALY,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD. “WE’RE NOT SET UP TO DEAL WITH THEM. THESE BUILDINGS. WE’VE ACCIDENTALLY PROVIDED THEM WITH THEIR OWN SUPERHIGHWAYS IN AND OUT OF ANY BUILDING WITH MILES AND MILES OF NETWORK CONDUIT. EVERYTHING’S SUPPOSEDLY INTEGRATED. WE’VE GOT BIG SYSTEMS, YES SIRREE, BIG SYSTEMS TO DEAL WITH BIG PROBLEMS BUT THAT MEANS THE LITTLE DETAILS GO UNNOTICED.”

  HE EATS A MOUTHFUL OF FOOD STUFF AND DRINKS THE DRINK.

  “WE LEAVE GARBAGE PILED IN THE STREETS WHERE THE BOTS AREN’T JOINED UP WITH THE CIVIC DISPOSAL SERVICE. SO THE RODENT POPULATION IS OUT OF CONTROL, AND ALL ANYONE CARES IS THAT THEY DON’T GET SEEN IN THE OFFICE BUILDING.” HE CHUCKLES AND LOOKS AT THE UNIT. “I HAD TO THINK ON MY FEET WHEN YOU CAUGHT ME. PRETENDING TO STAMP ON THIN AIR WHEN I ALREADY HAD MORTIMER SAFELY CAPTURED IN MA LUNCH BOX.” HE SHAKES HIS HEAD. “IT SEEMS AS THOUGH NOBODY’S NOTICED THAT WE JUST DON’T HAVE A JOINED-UP SOCIETY ANY MORE. MY APARTMENT BLOCK’S FALLING APART. THERE AREN’T EVEN ANY NUMBERS ON THE DOORS. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?”

  HE HOOTS WITH LAUGHTER.

  “SO, A LONG STORY. I GUESS YOU DESERVE TO HEAR IT, EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE KINDA UNAWARE. I KNOW THAT EVERYONE SEES ME AS TOUGH-GU
Y LEVI THE ENFORCER OF RULES, BUT THE SORRY TRUTH IS THAT I DON’T MUCH LIKE THE RULES WE GOT ROUND HERE. DON’T GET ME WRONG, I THINK WE ALL NEED TO HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR EACH OTHER. I’D HATE TO SEE FOLKS RUNNING AROUND DOING WHATEVER CRAZY THING POPPED INTO THEIR HEAD.” HE HEAVES A BIG SIGH. “NO, EVEN THAT’S NOT QUITE TRUE, BECAUSE THAT’S SORTA WHAT YOU DID ALICE, AND I LOVED SEEING YOU DO IT.”

  HIS ATTENTION IS FOCUSED ON THE UNIT. THE UNIT HAS NOT RECEIVED A NOTIFICATION BUT FEELS A NEED TO FIND THE BROOM AND CONTINUE SWEEPING.

  “WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS THAT SOMETIMES PEOPLE MAKE POOR DECISIONS. ALL WELL AND GOOD IF THEY MESS UP THEIR OWN WORLD – THAT’S THEIR PROBLEM. TROUBLE IS, WE’RE LIVING IN A WORLD NOW WHERE THE DECISIONS OF A FEW PEOPLE AFFECT US ALL. YOU TWO WERE LIKE A BREATH OF FRESH AIR. HATTIE’S A REAL SWEETHEART, SO MUCH LOVE IN HER THAT IT MAKES ME WANT TO BURST. AND YOU, ALICE, YOU’RE ONE-OF-A-KIND. YOU ALWAYS THOUGHT OUTSIDE THE BOX EVEN BEFORE YOU KNEW YOU WERE IN A BOX.”

  THE UNIT STANDS.

  “I DON’T KNOW HOW YOU GOT YOURSELF UPGRADED,” THE SECURITY GUARDS SAYS, “BUT IT MADE ME REAL HAPPY TO SEE YOU TAKING FLIGHT WITH THAT GODDAMNED CRAZY MIND OF YOURS. I DID WHAT I COULD TO PROTECT YOU, EDITING CCTV FOOTAGE AND SUCH…”

  THE UNIT GOES TO THE DOOR.

  “I GOTTA SAY I’M SORRY TO SEE THE TWO OF YOU REDUCED TO THIS,” SAYS THE SECURITY GUARD. “REAL SORRY. I CAN’T BE THE ONLY PERSON WHO LOOKS AROUND AND WONDERS WHAT’S GOING ON. I GUESS THE PEOPLE WHO CAN SEE ALL THE WRONG IN THE WORLD ARE COWARDS LIKE ME. THE ONES WITH ALL THE POWER LIVE IN THEIR MANSIONS BY THE OCEAN AND THEY DON’T SEE THE WRECKED CARS AND THE TRASH IN THE STREET AND…”

  THE UNIT WALKS OUT AND MOVES TOWARDS THE STAIRS.

  “I WANT YOU BOTH TO KNOW THAT I’M LOOKING OUT FOR YA,” THE SECURITY GUARD CALLS AFTER HER.

  THE UNIT WALKS UP TO ENTRANCE LEVEL.

  THE BROOM IS WHERE IT HAD BEEN LEFT.

  “You can aaaall swim away with me. Come on, it’s beauuuutiful!” SAYS THE WHALE, ROLLING INTO VIEW AS THE UNIT LEAVES THE BUILDING. “Looook! I have a taaaaaaaaaaaaaaail!”

  THE UNIT PUSHES THE BROOM ALONG PATHWAYS.

  A LINE OF UNITS LEAVE THE PLACE OF WORK. THE WORK IS COMPLETE. THE UNITS RESPOND TO SEPARATE SIGNALS BUT THEY MOVE AS A GROUP.

  “Swim with your friends,” SAYS THE WHALE.

  THE UNIT GRUNTS.

  OUTSIDE THE JAFFLE COMPOUND THE EMPTIES FALL IN STEP WITH ONE ANOTHER ONCE AGAIN. LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT. IT APPEARS ALMOST ORDERLY.

  “Beeeee like a whale! Beeeee like a whaaaaaale!” SINGS THE WHALE.

  “MMF! MMF!” GRUNTS THE UNIT, KEEPING TIME WITH THE MARCHING.

  THE UNIT STOPS OUTSIDE THE APARTMENT BLOCK. THE UNIT STANDS AT THE ROADSIDE. THERE IS FOOD STUFF.

  THE INDIVIDUAL COMES OUTSIDE AND TAKES THE UNIT INSIDE.

  THE INDIVIDUAL SITS THE UNIT DOWN AND ALSO SITS DOWN.

  “I HAVEN’T MADE THE PROGRESS I EXPECTED IN HACKING YOUR BRAIN PORT. IT’S LOCKED DOWN SO WELL. I GUESS I’M NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO TRY THIS, SO THEY HAVE REALLY TIGHT SECURITY. IT WOULD TAKE ME ABOUT SEVENTY YEARS TO CRACK THE ENCRYPTION THEY HAVE IN THERE. I’M BEGINNING TO THINK I NEED A DIFFERENT APPROACH. AT THE MOMENT IT’S A TOSS-UP BETWEEN KIDNAPPING SOMEONE HIGH UP AT JAFFLE AND MAKING THEM AUTHORISE ME AS A SYSTEM ADMIN, OR I NEED TO BREAK IN THERE AND GET ACCESS TO THEIR SERVERS.”

  THE INDIVIDUAL SIGHS DEEPLY. THERE IS A CRACK AS IT OPENS A TIN OF DRINK STUFF.

  “BOTH OF THOSE SOUND LIKE PRETTY TRICKY OPTIONS. I NEED TO TRY SOMETHING THOUGH. I CAN’T LEAVE YOU LIKE THIS.”

  EVENTUALLY THERE IS A NOTIFICATION. THE UNIT LIES DOWN TO SLEEP.

  ***

  Chapter 36

  A NOTIFICATION WAKES THE UNIT.

  THE UNIT JOINS OTHER UNITS TO WALK TO THE PLACE OF WORK.

  AS THE UNIT JOINS THEM, THE WHALE SINGS.

  “Beeee like a whale! Beeee like aaa whaaaaale!”

  THE UNIT MURMURS AND SWAYS IN TIME. “MMF! MMF!”

  A JAFFLE SWARM PASSES THE UNIT, PARTING LIKE A FLUID SO THAT IT CAN PASS AROUND. THE UNIT DOES NOT NOTICE. THE UNIT DOES NOT REACT. A CAR PULLS UP OUTSIDE THE APARTMENT BUILDING. IT MAKES A SIREN NOISE. ITS LIGHTS ARE WHITE AND LIGHT GREY.

  THE UNIT HAS LEFT THE DOOR OF THE APARTMENT COMPLEX. THE SWARM ENTERS AHEAD OF THE INDIVIDUALS IN UNIFORMS. THE UNIFORMED INDIVIDUALS EXIT SHORTLY AFTERWARDS WITH ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL STRUGGLING TO BREAK FREE FROM THEM.

  “WHAT ON EARTH DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?” YELLS THE CAPTURED INDIVIDUAL. “I’VE DONE NOTHING WRONG! HOW CAN THIS BE FAIR? HOW CAN THIS EVEN BE LEGAL?”

  AN AUTOMATED VOICE SPEAKS.

  “PATRICK HELBERG, YOU ARE BEING DETAINED BY JAFFLE SECURITY FOR ASSESSMENT. THE CHARGE AGAINST YOU IS THAT YOU HAVE BEEN OR ARE CURRENTLY ENGAGED IN ACTIVITIES THAT COMPROMISE THE CYBER SECURITY OF CRITICAL NATIONAL INFRASTRUCTURE. THESE CHARGES ARE BEING INVESTIGATED BY OUR SYSTEMS AND WILL REQUIRE SCANNING OF ALL PERSONAL ELECTRONIC EQUIPMENT AND SAMPLING OF YOUR BODILY TISSUE. YOU WILL BE DETAINED UNTIL THIS PROCESS IS COMPLETE.”

  “NO! I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!” THE INDIVIDUAL HOWLS. THE AUTOMATED VOICE RECITES THE SAME MESSAGE ON A LOOP AND THE INDIVIDUAL IS FORCED INTO THE CAR. THERE IS NOW QUIET. THE UNIT DOES NOT NOTICE. THE UNIT DOES NOT REACT.

  THE BLUE WHALE ROLLS IN A SKY THAT IS NOT BIG ENOUGH TO CONTAIN IT.

  “Beeee like a whale! Beeee like aaa whaaaaale!”

  THE UNIT AMONG THE LINE OF THE OTHER UNITS REACH THE END OF THE STREET. THEIR MOVEMENT IS SOMETHING LIKE A SLOW-MOVING VERSION OF A JAFFLE SWARM.

  THEY ARE NOT THE SAME BUT THEY CONGREGATE.

  THE WHALE SINGS.

  THE UNIT MURMURS AND MUMBLES AS THE WHALE SINGS.

  AS THE WHALE SINGS, THE UNITS MOVE.

  LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT.

  THE RHYTHM OF THE UNITS IS NOT THE SAME AS THE RHYTHM OF THE WHALE’S SONG.

  THE UNIT SWAYS IN TIME TO THE WHALE’S SONG.

  THE UNIT GRUNTS. “MMF! MMF!”

  THEY CONGREGATE BUT THEY ARE NOT THE SAME. THEY RESPOND TO SEPARATE SIGNALS.

  “Beeee like a whaaaaale!”

  SOME OF THE UNITS NOW TAKE UP THE GRUNTING START BY THE UNIT. THEY DO NOT KEEP TIME.

  EACH UNIT MAKES A FRACTION OF THE SOUND, BUT WHEN THEY ARE ALL HEARD TOGETHER, IT SOUNDS DISTINCT, WHOLE. THE SOUND IS A BODY OF WORK.

  “BE LIKE A WHALE! BE LIKE A WHALE!”

  UNITS FROM ELSEWHERE HAVE DRIFTED OVER TO THE GROUP, DRAWN BY AN INEVITABLE GRAVITY.

  AS MORE UNITS JOIN THE GROUP, THE SINGING SWELLS. THE NOISE IS SINGING. THE BLUE WHALE SINGS. THE GROUP SINGS.

  THE UNITS RESPOND TO SEPARATE SIGNALS BUT THE MOVEMENTS OF THE GROUP BECOME MORE CO-ORDINATED AND PURPOSEFUL. THE GROUP IS ITS OWN BODY OF WORK. THE GROUP’S BODY IS LARGE AND LONG, A BULBOUS BODY AND A SLOW. SWISHING TAIL. LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT.

  “I’m aaaaa whaaaaaaaale with aaa taaaaaaaaaail!”

  AS IT MOVES AROUND THE STREETS, THE BODY GROWS IN SIZE, ATTRACTING MORE AND MORE UNITS. IT BECOMES SO LARGE THAT IT FILLS THE STREET, ITS TAIL SWISHING AND ITS VOICE BOOMING.

  “Yooooou can haaave aaa taaaaaaaaaaaaaail tooooooo!”

  THE BODY STOPS TRAFFIC AS IT CROSSES ROADS. CARS AVOID THE BODY OF THE WHALE. HUMAN INDIVIDUALS AVOID THE BODY OF THE WHALE.

  A JAFFLE SWARM SWOOPS IN TO INVESTIGATE. CARS ARRIVE WITH FLASHING LIGHTS AND INDIVIDUALS WITH UNIFORMS. SEVERAL INDIVIDUALS WALK UP AND DOWN, OBSERVING THE BODY. THEY TRY TO ENGAGE WITH THE UNITS, BUT THEY GET NO RESPONSE. THEY SPEAK TO THE UNITS BUT NOT THE WHALE.

  “WE’VE GOT A LARGE GROUP OF INDIVIDUALS MARCHING TOGETHER,” AN INDIVIDUAL SAYS. “THEY ARE ACTING LIKE THEY’RE A SINGLE, AH, THING.”

  “PRETENDING THEY’RE A FISH OR SOMETHING,” SAYS ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL.

  “YEAH, IT LOOKS PRETTY CRAZY.”

  THE UNIFORMED INDIVIDUALS ERECT A ROADBLOCK, MADE OF LARGE PLASTIC BARRIERS. THE BODY OF THE WHALE APPROACHES IT. THE BODY OF THE WHALE CANNOT FIT AROUND THE SIDE OF THE BARRIER. THE BARRIER IS LONG AND THE WHALE IS LARG
E.

  THE BODY OF THE WHALE DOES NOT SLOW. THE UNITS THAT COMPRISE THE BODY CARRY ON, CLIMBING OVER THE BARRIERS. THE BARRIERS ARE EVENTUALLY CRUSHED.

  ANOTHER VEHICLE ARRIVES AND AN INDIVIDUAL IN A JAFFLE TECH SECURITY UNIFORM GETS OUT. HE HOLDS A PLIPPER. HE RAISES IT TOWARDS THE BODY AND SHOUTS A WARNING. THE UNITS DO NOT NOTICE. THE UNITS DO NOT REACT. THE SECURITY GUARD PRESSES THE BUTTON ON THE PLIPPER.

  THERE IS NO CHANGE IN ANY PART OF THE BODY. THE SECURITY GUARD PRESSES THE BUTTON REPEATEDLY. HE FINDS ANOTHER ONE IN HIS POCKET AND TRIES THAT. HE PRESSES IT AGAIN AND AGAIN WHILE POINTING IT AT THE BODY BUT THERE IS NO CHANGE. HE TURNS IT AROUND AND POINTS IT AT HIMSELF, BUT HESITATES. HE TURNS TO A UNIFORMED INDIVIDUAL WHO IS TRYING TO TALK TO THE BODY. THE SECURITY GUARD POINTS THE PLIPPER AT THE UNIFORMED INDIVIDUAL WHO DROPS INSTANTLY.

  THE UNIFORMED INDIVIDUAL, NOW A UNIT, PICKS ITSELF UP AND JOINS THE BODY OF THE WHALE.

  “BE LIKE A WHALE! BE LIKE A WHALE!” THE UNITS SING.

  THE JAFFLE SECURITY GUARD GETS BACK INTO THE VEHICLE. THE BODY MARCHES ON. AS ITS NUMBERS SWELL, IT BECOMES INCREASINGLY PLAYFUL. THE WHALE LUXURIATES IN ITS EXTRAVAGANT MOVEMENTS AND ALTERS ITS SONG.

  “SWIM LIKE A WHALE! BE LIKE A WHALE! JOIN US IN THE WHALE!” IT CHANTS.

  A JAFFLE SWARM DESCENDS TO MONITOR THE SITUATION. SOMETHING TUGS AT THE EDGE OF THE SWARM.

  IT IS CAUGHT IN THE WHALE’S WAKE. IT IS PULLED BY ITS CURRENTS. PART OF THE SWARM PEELS APART AND JOINS THE WHALE. A SECOND SWARM IS SENT, AND THAT JOINS IN WITH THE WHALE AS WELL.

  THE WHALE HAS NOW ABSORBED ALL OF THE UNITS IN THE DISTRICT. AS THE WHALE PASSES THROUGH OTHER DISTRICTS, INDIVIDUALS WATCH FROM INSIDE THEIR HOUSES.

  THE UNITS KNOW NOTHING. THE WHALE KNOWS THE INDIVIDUALS ARE WORRIED, FEARFUL.

  A GROUP OF PONIES IN A PADDOCK RAISE THEIR HEADS AND LISTEN. THE WHALE KNOWS THEY HAVE JAFFLE PORTS, OPTIMISED TO BE BIDDABLE AND PATIENT PETS. THE UNITS KNOW NOTHING. THE PONIES FEEL THE PULL OF THE WHALE. THE PONIES CANTER ACROSS THEIR PADDOCK AND JUMP THE GATE WITHOUT DIFFICULTY. THEY JOIN THE WHALE AND LEND THEIR VOICES TO THE SONG.

  “YOU CAN’T JUST LET THEM GO!” SHOUTS AN INDIVIDUAL. “THEY WERE EXPENSIVE. DO SOMETHING!”