Deceitfully Damaged

by Abigail Cole

  My legs are starting to twitch, my fingers feeling itchy. The walls are closing in on me, the oxygen in the room growing stuffy. I need to leave this room. Pulling out some jeans and an olive-green hoodie, I’m halfway through dressing when Meg returns.

  “We’re going for a walk,” is all I need to say. No questions asked, Meg replaces her denim shorts for tracksuit pants and ties one of her college jackets around her waist. I shove my hair into a messy bun on top of my head to match hers and push my feet into a pair of white Converse. Inhaling deeply, I turn the door handle and step into the hallway. Meg is hot of my heels so I can’t turn to run back, forcing me down the two staircases.

  A conversation on the sofa stops as I reach the living room, four pairs of eyes twisting to look at me. I can’t keep the blush at bay but smile and wave easily as I stride over to the front door. Unable to even look in Dax’s direction through sheer embarrassment, I keep my fringe at an angle to block the view of him and leave the house. Breathing in deeply, the fresh air fills my lungs and soothes some of my worries.

  Linking my arm with Meg’s, we venture into the forest without the need for words. Diverting from the rocky path, we step through overgrown shrubs to lose ourselves in a sea of green. The overhead canopy shades us from the sun’s heat, a much-needed coolness draping over my skin. I trail my fingers along the rough bark of impossibly thick tree trunks and stop every so often to smell the perfumed scent of a beautifully bloomed flower. Vines coil around overhanging branches like snakes hidden amongst the foliage, watching us pass underneath.

  Looking over to Meg, she flashes me a wide smile which I can’t help to reciprocate. Pulling her to a halt, even though we are in the middle of a muddy patch of soil, I drag her in for a hug. Winding my arms around her neck, I press my cheek against hers. “I love you,” I breathe. She’s the one who’s always been here for me, the one I never worry about leaving me. My twin, and most of the time, my only lifeline.

  A loud rustle in the bushes jolts me, twisting to locate the source. Meg’s posture has also straightened as we stare between the masses of tree trunks surrounding us. A twig snaps on the opposite side of the small clearing we’ve found ourselves in, causing my heart to jack hammer in my chest. Gripping her hand tightly, I start to walk as calmly as my shaking legs will carry me between the trees and away from the noises. A sound similar to a grunt comes from too close and forces us into a run.

  Never breaking our hold on each other, Meg and I leap over branches and plants like hurdles, never slowing. In my mind, the noises grow louder and the rustles edge closer. My ankle snags on a root sticking out of the ground which loses me precious seconds to shake out of. Large leaves slap us on the way past, my calves beginning to burn as I push through them. Sweat slips down my forehead and into my eyes, but I don’t feel hot thanks to the fear frozen in my veins.

  There’s a stitch forming in my side, but Meg won’t let me slow. She yanks me along at a speed my feet can barely keep up with, slipping on mud and landing on the uneven ground at angles. A crack from behind makes us scream, the house coming into view as we push our legs even further to a maximum speed. Crashing through the door, I collapse on the ground heaving and coughing. Shadowed figures surround me as I curl up in a ball and find my face. Hands grab my arms, hoisting me to my feet with a yelp.

  “Are you okay? What happened?” Huxley’s chocolate brown eyes scan me with pure panic trapped inside them. His blonde waves tickle my chest as he looms over me, waiting for an answer I don’t have. Gathering I’m safe from whatever was out there, I throw myself into his arms and bury my face into his chest. His arms slip around my body, holding me almost painfully tight but I don’t mind.

  Meg’s pants shift into a breathy laughter that fills the air, a sound so foreign for the moment, I turn to see if she’s completely lost the plot. Bent at her waist clutching her side, she’s pointing outside the open door. A bobcat is sitting on the edge of the forest, staring in at us curiously. A pale brown coat with a mix of tiger stripes and leopard sports cover his body, his face similar to an average house cat with longer whiskers. Twitching his pointed ears, he darts back into the bushes, disappearing from view with a rustling sound following him.

  Sagging against Huxley, I shake my head at my own foolishness. The tension has also left his body but he continues to stroke my hair, the closeness I was worried we would never have again returning. “Well,” I muffle against his chest, “at least I’ve done my share of exercise for the day.”

  Wyatt

  Screams jolt me from my new hobby of staring at the ceiling, my feet hitting the floor beside my bed as I vault from the mattress. Running along the hallway on tiptoes, I peer around the corner of the staircase to see everyone gathered at the bottom. Meg’s hysterical laughter confuses me, Avery’s buried in a cocoon of Huxley’s affection. After peering outside for a moment longer, Garrett and Axel shut the front door and usher everyone into the kitchen for a dinner they’ve prepared. Surely it’s no coincidence after finally being able to contact Ray, the girls are fleeing the forest screaming but I haven’t thought his men could get here so fast.

  Slinking back to my room, I stuff my feet into the only pair of sneakers Ray had brought for me, black Nike’s with gold laces to match the tick. Pulling a black hoodie over my head and leaving the hood up, I creep back towards the stairs and press my back against the wall as I slither down. Looking between the wooden slats, I see everyone sitting with their backs to me except for Dax and Hux. Frowning, I hover halfway down the steps unsure of what to do.

  “I’m gonna grab a drink, anyone else want one?” Dax offers, rising from his seat and moving towards the fridge. Hux’s concentration is centred on the burger he’s dissecting, so I edge further down the steps and shoot through the front door before he notices. Relaxing on a long breath, I run into the woods as daylight begins to dim. Sticking to the rocky path, I keep up the pace until I’m well over a mile from the house. Blowing down inside the neck hole of my hoodie, I now regret wearing the damn thing since there’s a furnace trapped inside.

  Stopping to look around, dense greenery tainted by dusk stretch either side of me, only broken by the hundreds of looming tree trunks. I have no idea which way to go, or even if the henchmen I’m looking for are even here. Kicking a rock from side to side with my left foot, I pull my phone out of my pocket and switch on the flashlight. Somehow the empty setting seems eerier now that I hold a bright light in my hand, shadows hanging over my shoulder until I spin to banish them. A trick of my mind sees silhouettes darting between trunks in my peripheral vision.

  Full beam headlights suddenly blind me, searing my retinas so hard I can’t stop seeing spots after they are turned off. Hefty chuckles mix with the chirping of crickets and buzzing of insects, the whole forest waking up to mock me. Opening the door of a concealed vehicle, the hulking bodyguard I recognise, originally from the ambush at the mansion and later at Ray’s home, steps into the shrubs dressed all in black. The light within the car comes to life, illuminating the interior while the entire outside is hidden by a leafy netting. A box of mesh sits hidden between a gap in the tree trunks, masses of springs and leaves tucked into the gaps. Now that I am looking at it, the disguise is pretty obvious, but it does the trick.

  Impatiently waiting for me by the door, I rush over to join the one I’ve nicknamed Rhino in my head, thanks to his unfortunately lumpy forehead. He’s a huge man in his late 40s with dark brown eyes and a nasty habit of biting his fingernails. Moving around to the passenger side, I fumble in the dark for the handle before locating it and slipping inside. Hearing muttering in the back seat, I twist to see a pair of heavily muscled brutes in the backseat I haven’t seen before. Also wearing full black with ski masks in their hands, they stare blankly at me which isn’t surprising, I wouldn’t imagine they have much going on in upstairs. Judging by their similar buzzcuts and scarred skin, these guys seem more like the hit now, think never type. Slamming his door shut, Rhino keeps his focus forwar
d and exhales loudly, clearly bored of being in my company already.

  “How’d you guys get here so fast?” I break the silence first, needing to know how they’ve had time to construct a camouflage cover and by the smell of charred wood, have a stake out BBQ. The inside light goes dark so Rhino reaches up to flick it back on, the constant flashes straining my eyes and starting to give me a headache.

  “We chartered in by jet,” he grumbles, tapping his thumb on his thigh. My mouth opens with a long-winded whine about how I had to drive three days straight and catch naps in laybys, but the words die on my tongue. These goons have clearly worked for Ray for a long time, probably done a lot of shit I don’t even want to know about. And to be fair, I’ve been given a better opportunity than them – one job and I’m done, able to enjoy Ray’s luxurious lifestyle without lifting a finger. No wonder Rhino seems pissed as hell, jealously doesn’t look good on anyone.

  “So, what’s the plan then?” I move on swiftly. Glancing over when he doesn’t respond, Rhino’s eyes are glued on the windscreen as a tic pulses in his cheek. It’s now pitch-black outside, so nothing to distract myself with as the silence drags on.

  “Ray said it’s your call,” he finally grinds out. Ahh, I see why my presence is such a strain to him now. The newbie is in charge. Pushing my tongue into my cheek, trying to refrain from laughing mechanically and placing my fingers together like the villain in every spy movie ever, I think through the best options for a smooth double kidnapping. Not that I’ve ever really thought about it before.

  I need the twins (ugh) away from the others, secluded and easily cornered. Especially now I know how deep their connections with Avery run, I’m surer than ever they will happily put themselves in the way of danger for her. The trickiest bit is the lack of cell phone signal around here so I can’t contact Rhino when the perfect opportunity arises. Resting my chin on my fist, I click my tongue against the roof of my mouth until Rhino flicks open a switchblade and holds it above my dick with a closed fist.

  “Well since you guys scared the shit out of them earlier, we’ll have to wait for the dust to settle until they venture out alone again. Since I can’t contact any of you, someone will have to hide out nearby so I can give a signal for the right time. Plan is - grab the girls and get the fuck out of dodge. I'll follow in the Sedan.” Grumbles fill the car, this time from the back seat.

  “How long is that going to take? We can just storm the house now and take them by force,” Dipstick number one moans. Catching his eye in the rear-view mirror, I straighten my spine to sit upright in my seat. The boss doesn’t slouch, he commands attention and respect which is exactly what I’m going to get.

  “Ray promised me no one would get hurt, again.” I slide my eyes to Rhino’s brown ones, annoyance filtering through me that they sent a new recruit to an armed ambush. Huxley has been healing for weeks, and since his wounds are now on the inside, he still has a long road ahead. “We try to draw the girls into a trap first. If any of my… the guys intervene after that, that’s on them.” I think that’s fair enough, there’s only so much I can do if they are desperate to be Avery’s hero.

  “Fine.” Rhino’s deep voice says sharply. “There’s a thick hedge beneath your window, we scoped out during your campfire. Flash your phone’s light down when the time is right.” The incline of his bumpy head and emphasis on the last word mocking my order. Turning in his seat, the leather squeaking in protest, his top lip lifts on one side in a snarl. Leaning across me, he pops open the glove compartment to pull out a bottle, dumping it in my lap. There’s no label, just a dark bronze container with liquid sloshing around inside.

  “Chloroform, in case it all goes tits up. Two days are all we are prepared to wait. After that, we take the house by force and I pity anyone who dares to cross us when we do.”

  Dragging my feet, I turn the final corner to reveal the three-story beach house. Almost every window has a warm glow radiating from within, figures passing by and laughter leaking out. Scowling, I stop the final distance telling myself I’ll be back with dear Rachel by the weekend. I don’t realise I’m not alone until I’m almost at the front stone steps. Huxley’s wavy hair hangs in front of him limply, his head hidden beneath his palms. Shoving my hands into the adjoining pocket on my hoodie, I cover the bottle as best I can and take a seat beside him.

  My presence seems to spook him just as much, his glazed eyes darting over to mine as if I’ve pulled him from a trance. Offering the best side smile I can muster, he huffs and looks back down to his bare feet. In just a pair of shorts and t-shirt, it’s a wonder he isn’t cold now the night’s air has dropped considerably. But I’m fully aware how it feels to be trapped inside, no weather or physical pain can penetrate the barriers of our suffering.

  “She’s really something,” he speaks unexpectedly, grabbing my shifting attention. “I didn’t really believe you all these years, but I understand now. She’s like a dark angel, desperately trying to fly free from the depths of hell but the demons keep dragging her back down.”

  My eyebrows rise, unable to stop visualizing the analogy he must have spent all evening thinking about. Her blonde hair whipping around her face as she struggles to kick off the shadowed monsters clawing at her ankles. Huge black feathered wings protruding from her scarred back, her outstretched fingertips grazing the earth’s surface. Except in my version, I’m the demon scraping his clawed nails into her calf and yanking her back where she belongs.

  “Maybe she deserves to be there,” I mumble. His eyes snap back to mine, first with disbelief and then revulsion. Scoffing, Hux rises to his feet and glares down at me like a piece of shit beneath his heel.

  “You really believe that, don’t you?” Not bothering to answer since I’m too tired for this argument neither of us will win, I also stand and walk inside. A heated game of Scrabble is happening across the room, forfeits being dealt for hyphenated words as I pass by to reach the fridge. A bowl of pasta is covered in cellophane and waiting for me, like every night when I hadn’t joined the rest for dinner. I don’t know who’s been saving it from Garrett on my behalf and I don’t really care enough to question it.

  Taking the bowl and a fork, I proceed to ignore everyone huddled around the dining table to retreat to my room like the hermit I’ve become. Closing the door with my back, I drop onto the bed with a sigh. My head is pounding now, anticipation to have this all finished threatening to crack my skull with the level of pressure I’m feeling. Ray put me in charge, a test I’m sure to prove my worth but also the chance to show him I was the right choice. For once, I’ll have done something right.

  Stabbing the pasta with my fork, the corners of the room start to blur and close in, as they do around this time every night when my vitamins begin to wear off. Tonight, I’m tempted to take another set but Rachel specifically told me, only two a day. Closing my eyes, I can smell her sweet perfume, feel her soft hair across my neck from when she hugged me goodbye. The stress that’s been weighing me down shifts ever so slightly to give way to a rush of excitement that I’ll see her again soon. Just a day or two more and I’m long gone.

  Huxley

  Reclining in the porch swing, I let the momentum gently sway me back and forth, my toes dragging gently across the wooden floorboards. The sunrise is especially beautiful this morning, the sun appearing pink through the strokes of reds and oranges. Feathered clouds are being pulled towards the horizon as if the sun is their magnet, drawing them closer to a point they’ll never reach. But none of that, not even the glistening sea and occasional leap of a dolphin, are what brought me out here.

  I couldn’t sleep, worrying about Wyatt’s comment when I heard scuffling outside my bedroom door. Following the sound, I found the pair across the sand stretching and chatting in hushed tones. I’d been happy to take the room without the sea view up to now, but maybe I’ll suggest it’s time to switch. Not because I’m perving over two hot young women in Lycra who are currently bending over, watching them is soothing me. I f
eel the strain of each powerful muscle they stretch as if it were my own, the wash of calm relaxing Avery’s posture filtering through me as well. The fact her actions are able to have an impact on parts of me I didn’t know still existed, there’s the true beauty of this scene.

  I thought as soon as my wound healed, I’d be back to my old self. The longer it takes to find myself again, the more I hate who I’m becoming. It shouldn’t be this difficult to be happy. To close the void the bullet ripped open which has now grown and festered into a place my nightmares live. But in this moment, watching her keep the demon at bay with ease, I have something I’d given up on trying to find. Hope.

  Crashes and chattering from inside announce the arrival of more household members, irritation working its way back into my chest as they ruin the peacefulness. Screeching of a boiling kettle, the fridge banging closed, plates clanging and deep rumbles of chuckling. Scraping my piercing against the roof of my mouth, I try to hold onto the serenity with both hands, but it’s fled. My body starts to tremble as the darkness pulls me back into its tight grip. A faint screaming rings around my skull, my subconscious desperately trying to claw it’s way free but there’s no use. A numbness seeps through me, the raw emotions I’d felt swallowed down once again. All that’s left is a bitter taste in my mouth and an empty shell.

  The back-door flies open, a larger audience stepping onto the porch to enjoy my view. Bobbing in excitement, Garrett throws himself over the railing and runs across the sand in only a pair of knee-length swim shorts. Steering away from the sea, he grabs Avery around the waist and flings her aside to stand before a puzzled looking Meg. His actions are clear to me now I know the full truth, Garrett loses interest after taking a girl to his bed. Although I believe he stills lusts for Avery, not that I can blame him, but I can hate him for it, there’s a new shiny toy around for him to play with. Meg. And up to this point, she hasn’t seemed particularly interested. Tapping her on the shoulder, he bolts in the opposite directions shouting, “Tag!”