Complete Works of Plautus

by Plautus

  LYE.

  But release me speedily, please.

  STROBILUS

  Here, take this stone. Giving him a stone.

  LYCONIDES

  If I knowingly deceive you, so may Jupiter reject from me his blessings, the city and citadel safe, as I do this stone. (He throws it. Have I now satisfied you?

  STROBILUS

  I am satisfied; and I’m going to bring the gold.

  LYCONIDES

  Go with the speed of Pegasus, and return devouring the road with your rapid steps. Exit STROBILUS. Any impertinent slave, that wishes to be more wise than his master, is a nuisance to a decent man. Let this Strobilus be off as a free man to utter perdition, if he only brings me the pot full of pure gold, so that I may restore Euclio, my father-in-law, from his grief to joy, and obtain the favour of his daughter, who is just brought to bed by reason of my debauching her. But see! Strobilus is returning, loaded; as I guess, he’s bringing the pot; and, for sure, it is the pot that he’s carrying.

  Enter STROBIOUS, carrying the pot of gold.

  STROBILUS

  Lyconides, I bring you my findings that I promised — the four pound pot of gold; have I been long?

  LYCONIDES

  Why, yes. He takes some of the gold out of the pot. O immortal Gods, what do I behold? Or what is it I hold? More than six hundred Philippean pieces, three or four times over. But let’s call out Euclio forthwith.

  LYCONIDES

  going to the door of EUCLIO’S house . Ho, Eucho, Euclio!

  MEGADORUS

  Euclio, Euclio!

  EUCLIO

  opening his window . What’ the matter?

  LYCONIDES

  Come down to us, for the Gods will you to be saved; we’ve got the pot.

  EUCLIO

  Have you got it, or are you trifling with me?

  LYCONIDES

  We’ve got it, I say. Now, if you can, fly down hither.

  EUCLIO

  having come out of the house to them . O great Jupiter! O household Divinity and Queen Juno! and Alcides, my treasurer! that at length you do show pity upon a wretched old man. Taking the pot in his arms. O my pot! O how aged I, your friend, do clasp you with joyful arms, and receive you with kisses; with a thousand embraces even I cannot be satisfied. O my hope! my heart! that dissipates my grief.

  LYCONIDES

  aside, to MEGADORUS . I always thought that to be in want of gold was the worst thing for both boys and men, and all old people. Indigence compels boys to be guilty of misdeeds, men to thieve, and old men themselves to become beggars. But ’tis much worse, as I now see, to abound in gold beyond what’s necessary for us. Alas! what miseries has Euclio endured on account of the pot, that a little while since was lost by him!

  EUCLIO

  To whom shall I give deserved thanks? Whether to the Gods, who show regard for good men, or to my friends, upright men, or to them both? Rather to both, I think; and first to you, Lyconides, the origin and author of so great a good; you do I present with this pot of gold; accept it with pleasure. I wish it to be your own, and my daughter as well, in the presence of Megadorus, and his good sister, Eunomia.

  LYCONIDES

  receiving the pot of gold . The favour is received, and is returned, in thanks, as you deserve, Eucho, a father-in-law most acceptable to me.

  EUCLIO

  I shall think the favour sufficiently returned to me, if you now receive with pleasure my gift, and myself as well for your father-in-law.

  LYCONIDES

  I do receive it; and I wish my house to be that of Euclio.

  STROBILUS

  What still remains, master, — remember now that I’m to be free.

  LYCONIDES

  You’ve well put me in mind. Be you a free man, O Strobilus, for your deserts; and now prepare in-doors the dinner that has been so disturbed.

  STROBILUS

  coming forward . Spectators, the avaricious Euclio has changed his nature; he has suddenly become liberal; so, too, do you practise liberality; and if the play has pleased you well, loudly clap your hands.

  BACCHIDES

  Translated by Henry Thomas Riley

  The plot of this comedy revolves around the misunderstandings surrounding two sisters, each called Bacchis, who work in a brothel. Bacchides includes The play was most likely an adaptation of the play Δὶς Ἐξαπατῶν (Dis Exapaton), meaning Twice Deceiving but more commonly known as The Double Deceiver, by the Greek New Comedy playwright Menander. The beginning of the text is lost and so is often reconstructed in modern-day adaptations using contextual clues as well as twenty surviving fragments.

  The plot opens with two young friends, Mnesilochus and Pistoclerus, who have fallen in love with two sisters, the courtesans named Bacchis. Mnesilochus’s Bacchis has been hired for a year by Cleomachus. In order to get the money to purchase her release Mnesilochus asks Chrysalus, the clever slave, to extort money from Nicobulus (a common recipe in Greek and Roman comedies). Chrysalus succeeds in getting two hundred coins from the old man but then Pistoclerus announces his love for Bacchis. Mnesilochus, not knowing that there is more than one Bacchis, hands back the money to his father and reveals the whole deception and Chrysalus’s part in it. Then the truth is revealed… There are two Bacchises and Pistoclerus loves the other Bacchis!

  Menander (c. 342/41–c. 290 BC), a Greek dramatist and the best-known representative of Athenian New Comedy, is believed to be the original source behind this play. He wrote 108 comedies and took the prize at the Lenaia festival eight times.

  CONTENTS

  THE SUBJECT.

  THE ACROSTIC ARGUMENT.

  ACT I.

  ACT II.

  ACT III.

  ACT IV.

  ACT V.

  THE SUBJECT.

  MNESILOCHUS, when absent at Ephesus, writes and requests his friend, Pistoclerus, to search for his mistress, Bacchis, who has left Athens with a military Captain. Having discovered her on her return to Athens, Pistoclerus falls in love with her twin-sister, whose name is also Bacchis, and is severely reproved by his tutor, Lydus, for so doing. Mnesilochus returns to Athens, and discovers from Lydus that his friend Pistoclerus is in love with a female of the name of Bacchis. He thereupon imagines that he has supplanted him with his own mistress, and in his anger resolves to restore to his father some money of his which he had gone to Ephesus to recover, and a part of which he had contrived, through a scheme of the servant Chrysalus, to retain, in order that he might redeem his mistress from the Captain. Having afterwards discovered the truth, he greatly repents that he has done so, as the officer threatens to carry Bacchis off instantly, if the money is not paid. On this, Chrysalus contrives another stratagem against Nicobulus, his aged master, and makes him, through fear of the Captain’s threats, pay the required sum. Having gained not only this but a still further sum of money, the young men regale themselves at the house of Bacchis. Nicobulus afterwards discovers from the Captain the trick that has been played upon him, and he and Mnesilochus repair to the house of Bacchis to demand their sons. The damsels, hereupon, apply themselves to coaxing the old men, who are at last persuaded to forgive their sons and Chrysalus and to go into the house and join the entertainment.

  THE ACROSTIC ARGUMENT.

  [Supposed to have been written by Priscian the Grammarian.]

  MNESILOCHUS is inflamed with love for Bacchis (Bacchidis). But, first of all, he goes to Ephesus, to bring back some gold (Aurum). Bacchis sails for Crete (Cretam), and meets with (Convenit) the other Bacchis; thence she returns to Athens; upon this (Hinc), Mnesilochus sends a letter to Pistoclerus, that he may seek for her (Illam). He returns; he makes a quarrel while (Dum) he supposes that his own mistress is beloved by Pistoclerus; when they have discovered the mistake as to the twin-sisters, Mnesilochus pays the gold to that (Ei) Captain; equally are the two in love. The old men (Senes), while they are looking after their sons, join the women, and carouse. THE PROLOGUE.

  SILENUS

 
mounted on his Ass.

  ’Tis a wonder if the spectators on the benches this day don’t hiss, and cough, and make a snorting noise at this ridiculous sight, furrow their brows, and, with cries with one consent, shout all aloud, and mutter imprecations. Hardly in their youth can beardless actors, or mimics with their beards plucked out, find room upon the stage. Why comes forth this aged and lethargic go-between, who is borne upon the ass’s back? Listen, I pray, and give me your attention, while I tell you the name of this quiet Comedy. ’Tis proper for you to make silence for a Divinity. It befits not those to use the resources of the voice, who come here not to exclaim, but to be spectators. Give me attentive ears; but not into my hands I mean; I wish my voice, as it flies, to strike these vacant ears. What do you fear? Are those blows more hurtful which open what is shut, or which close what is open? You’re very kind; the inhabitants of heaven do love you deservedly. There is profound silence — even the children are still — and now, attend to a new-come messenger, on a new errand. Who I am — why I am come to you — I’ll tell you in a few words; at the same time, I’ll disclose to you the name of this Comedy. Now, behold, I shall tell you what you wish to know; do you then give me your attention. I am a God of Nature, the foster-father of most mighty Bromius, him who, with a female army, gained a kingdom. Whatever about him renowned nations relate, some part, at least, has been accomplished by my advice. That which pleases me is never displeasing to him. ’Tis right if one father another father does obey. Ass-borne do the Ionian multitudes style me, because I am borne on an ass for my conveyance. Who I am, you understand: if you understand, allow me now to tell the name of this quiet play; at the same time, you may learn why I have come to you. Philemon formerly produced a play in Greek; this, those who speak the Greek language call “Evantides;” Plautus, who speaks the Latin, calls it “Bacchides.” ’Tis not to be wondered, then, if hither I have come. Bacchus sends to you the Bacchides — the Bacchanalian Bacchanals. I am bringing them unto you. What! Have I told a lie? It don’t become a God to tell a lie; but the truth I tell — I bring not them; but the salacious ass, wearied with its journey, is bringing to you three, if I remember right. One you behold; see now, what on my lips I bring — to wit, two Samian sisters, Bacchanalians, merry Courtesans, born of the same parents, at one time, at a twin-birth; not less alike than milk to milk, if you compare it, or water to water; were you to see them you would think them halved; so much would you confuse your sight, that you would not be able to distinguish which was which. What remains you long to hear. Now give attention: the story of this Play I will disclose. What country Samos is, is known to all; for seas, lands, mountains, and islands, have your legions made easy of access. There, Sostrata bore to her husband, Pyrgoteles Pyrocles, twin daughters at one birth; and it pleased them, being initiated at the triennial festival of Bacchus, to call after his name the damsels of which they were the parents. The parents, as often happens, gave a turn to their future fortunes. A Captain carried one of them with him to Crete. The other of the twins sailed for Athens. As soon as Mnesilochus, the son of Nicobulus, beheld her, he began to love her, and frequently paid her visits. Meantime, his father sent the youth to Ephesus, to bring back thence some gold, which he himself, some time before, had deposited with Archidemides, an ancient friend of his, an aged Phœnician. When, for two years he had stayed at Ephesus, he received the sad news that Bacchis was gone from Athens, for some sailors of his acquaintance sent him word that she had set sail. On this, he writes a letter to Pistoclerus, his only friend, the son of Philoxenus, entreating him to seek the fugitive with care and earnestness. While Pistoclerus is devoting his services to his friend, the twin-sisters, who have just returned to Athens, arouse a passion in the seeker. The one wins Pistoclerus for herself; the other longs for the coming of Mnesilochus. What wonder if two bewitching, merry, pretty Bacchantes, should attract to themselves two unfledged Bacchanalians, and if they should ensnare their decrepit, most aged fathers, fit subjects for the undertaker, bowed down by the weight of their years? But, see, here’s Pistoclerus, who is returning to the Bacchides so lately found, and in his simplicity is blowing in himself the sparks of passion so lately kindled. Now I’m off — do you attend. (Exit.)

  ACT I.

  Enter PISTOCLERUS.

  PISTOCLERUS

  ... those who are of a thrifty turn of mind, modest, and without servility. ... Chains, rods, and mills; their shocking brutality becomes worse. ... She who keeps my friend and me engaged. ... (Exit.) Enter FIRST BACCHIS.

  1st BACCHIS

  I have heard that Ulysses underwent toils innumerable, who, in wanderings, was twenty years away from his native land. But this young man by far outdoes Ulysses; who here in this spot is wandering within the walls of the city. ...

  1st BACCHIS

  ... She was of the same name with myself. ...

  1st BACCHIS

  Sweep out the house with brooms, work briskly. ... Will some one call that most dirty fellow with the water-pail and the water. CLEOMACHUS, SECOND BACCHIS.

  CLEOMACHUS

  ... But if a life of wantonness is perchance preferred by you, consider the price that I agreed to give you that at that age you might not be following me for nought ... that from no one else you might be receiving a yearly pay, except from oneself, nor be toying with any man ... like slugs upon a man. PISTOCLERUS, SECOND BACCHIS, SERVANT. ...

  PISTOCLERUS

  As like as milk is to milk; whatever is her name ...

  SERVANT

  The soldier who sells his life for gold ... I know that his breath is much stronger than when the bellows of bull’s hide are blowing, when the rocks melt where the iron is made.

  PISTOCLERUS

  Of what country did he seem to you?

  SERVANT

  I think he is of Præneste; he was such a boaster.

  PISTOCLERUS

  ... The city ... and I don’t think it is in spurious boastfulness. ... Enter FIRST and SECOND BACCHIS.

  1st BACCHIS

  ... My heart, my hope, my honey, my sweetness, my nutriment, my delight. ... Let me bestow on you my love ... the Arabian ... Has Cupid or has love overpowered you? ... Perhaps to suspect that you are in love. ... Get money from that quarter ... for I really do believe that with ease you can enchant the heart of any man.

  1st BACCHIS

  And suppose it is much better that you should hold your peace, and I should speak?

  2nd BACCHIS

  With pleasure; you may proceed.

  1st BACCHIS

  When my memory shall fail me, then do you take care to aid me, sister.

  2nd BACCHIS

  I’ faith, I’m more afraid that I shan’t have the choice of prompting you.

  1st BACCHIS

  Troth, I’m afraid the little nightingale may lose her powers of song. Follow this way. They move. Enter PISTOCLERUS.

  PISTOCLERUS

  What are these two Courtesans, the namesake-sisters, about?

  1st BACCHIS

  Nothing is there more wretched than a woman.

  PISTOCLERUS

  What, say you, is there more worthy of it? What have you been planning in your consultation?

  1st BACCHIS

  What’s proper?

  PISTOCLERUS

  I’ faith, that doesn’t belong to the Courtesan.

  1st BACCHIS

  This sister of mine entreats me so to find some person to protect her against this Captain; that when she as served her time he may bring her back home. Do you, I entreat you, be her protector.

  PISTOCLERUS

  Why should I protect her?

  1st BACCHIS

  That she may be brought home again, when she has fulfilled her engagement to him, so that he may not take her as a servant for himself. But, if she had the gold to pay him back again, gladly would she do so.

  PISTOCLERUS

  Where now is this person?

  1st BACCHIS

  I expect that he’ll be here just now. But this
you’ll be able to arrange better among ourselves; and sitting there, you shall wait until he comes. So you will drink some wine, and so, I’ll give you a kiss when you have drunk it.

  PISTOCLERUS

  Your coaxing is mere birdlime.

  1st BACCHIS

  How so?

  PISTOCLERUS

  Because, in fact, I understand how you two are aiming at one poor pigeon, myself; aside very nearly is the limed reed breaking my feathers. Madam, I judge that such deeds befit me not.

  1st BACCHIS

  Why so, I pray?

  PISTOCLERUS

  Bacchis, it is, because I dread you Bacchantes, and your Bacchanalian den.

  1st BACCHIS

  What is it that you dread? Surely, not that the couch in my house may lead you into mischief?

  PISTOCLERUS

  Your allurements, more than your couch, do I dread. You’re a mischievous serpent. But, madam, a lurking-place does not befit this youthful age.

  1st BACCHIS

  Should you wish at my house to do anything that’s unwise, I myself should hinder it. But, when the Captain comes, I wish you to be at my house for this reason; because, when you are present, no one will do her and me any injury. You will prevent that, and by the same means you will be aiding your friend; this Captain, too, on arriving, will suspect that I am your mistress. Why are you silent, pray?

  PISTOCLERUS

  Because these things are pleasant in the talking of; but in the practice, and when you make trial, the same are armed with stings. They pierce the feelings, goad one’s fortune, and wound one’s merits and character.

  2nd BACCHIS

  What do you dread from her?

  PISTOCLERUS

  What do I dread, do you ask? Am I a person in my youth to enter a place of exercise of such a nature, where people sweat to their undoing? — where for the quoit I rereive a loss, disgrace, too, for my running?