Play Me (Jaded Ivory Book 5)

by Rebecca Brooke

  My whole body was aware of the heat that radiated off him. I didn’t ever remember a movie being that long before as I waited for the credits to roll, giving me some space from him. The scent of his cologne wrapped firmly around me.

  By the time the credits started I was so on edge, so I jumped the minute he stood.

  With a smirk he stared down at me. “I knew you didn’t like movies like this, but thanks for picking one I’d like.”

  If only that had been the problem. I did my best to school my features. The last thing I needed was for him to know how I felt about him. “Glad you liked it.”

  He pulled out his phone and glanced at the time. “Shit, you have to work tomorrow, don’t you?”

  “Yeah. Tomorrow morning.”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Sorry I kept you up this late when you have to be up early.”

  He stood, collecting the glasses and empty bottle. The second he was a few feet away, I took the first deep breath I’d taken in hours. “It’s okay,” I called out.

  He came around the corner with a smile on his face. “I’m glad we got to do this. Maybe we can do something later this week.”

  “Okay,” came out of my mouth before I had a chance to stop it. What was I doing to myself?

  “Perfect. I’ll let myself out. Get some sleep.”

  He waved on the way down the hall. The sound of the door shutting hit my ears.

  “There’s no way I’m getting a good night’s sleep tonight,” I said into the empty room.

  I’d be lucky if I could get him out of my head long enough to fall asleep.

  Somehow I’d managed to drag myself out of bed after tossing and turning all night. Apparently, Jackson didn’t only want to hunt me down during the awake hours, but he wanted inside my dreams too.

  I gripped the mug in my hand like a lifeline. If only we had a way to mainline caffeine into my bloodstream. Twelve hours sounded overwhelming. But I had to push aside my exhaustion. People’s lives depended on it.

  I stepped into the locker room and dropped down onto the bench.

  “Long night?”

  I glanced over my shoulder to see Liz waggling her brows at me.

  “Or should I say two long nights?” She winked and sat down on the bench next to me.

  “You shouldn’t say anything right now. I’m tired and cranky enough to do something where it will be a good thing you’re in a hospital.”

  “Cranky?” Her brows drew together. “How could you be cranky after a night in bed with Jackson Hadden?”

  I rolled my eyes and opened my locker. Thank God it was on the bottom row and I didn’t need to get up. “I’ve spent plenty of nights in bed with Jackson, but last night and the night before weren’t one of them.”

  “Wait…You slept…You didn’t…” The way she continued to open and close her mouth would be comical if the whole situation wasn’t an absolute mess.

  I should’ve ignored the door, gone back to my room, and hidden in there until he left. The stupid part of my brain that still hoped we’d find our way back together again had won.

  And I knew it wouldn’t be one night. Jackson had my number and address. If I avoided his calls, he'd probably show up on my doorstep to check on me.

  “To answer the million questions I can see running through your mind, yes, I’ve known Jackson a long time. Yes, we dated in college, but life got in the way. No, I didn’t know he’d be at the bar the other night. And most important, I didn’t sleep with him.”

  She gave her head a shake, her eyes wide. “I figured you knew him, but I thought maybe you’d taken care of him when he’d hurt his ankle a few weeks ago.”

  “I did, but I met him a long time ago, when we were in college.”

  “And I guess things didn’t work out?”

  I stared at the ground. “No, but not because of him. He was perfect, but I had some problems and I didn’t want him to give up his dream for me.”

  “Shit.” Liz wrapped her arm around my shoulders, pulling me into a sideways hug. “I’m so sorry. I wouldn’t have convinced you to go with him had I known all that.”

  I lifted my head and gave her a half smile. “I know. It’s not your fault I didn’t tell you.”

  She let go and moved to face me. “So, what now?”

  I pushed the rest of my crap into the locker and shut it. “What do mean ‘what now’?”

  She stood and followed me out of the locker room, walking side by side as we made our way to the ER. “You guys did look really cute together on the dance floor and when you were cozied up together in the lounge area.”

  I stopped dead in my tracks. “Stop right there. Nothing is going to happen. He’s a rock star in one of the hottest bands out there and I’m a nurse.”

  “And to the guys in that band, it doesn’t mean anything. Have you followed them at all?”

  I shrugged and started walking again. “A little.” I’d mostly followed Jackson and Monty. Not that I had to really follow Monty. He created the kind of press that was national news.

  Liz laid her hand on my arm, stopping me again. “Heath’s wife was a waitress, although I think she owns her own restaurant now. And Monty’s wife—”

  “Is a teacher.”

  “See, you do follow them.”

  “Um, Monty’s wedding was all over every paper. How could I miss it? And I’ve known Monty almost as long as I’ve known Jackson.”

  “All the more reason you shouldn’t dismiss a chance with him.”

  I placed both of my hands on her shoulders. “Look, I really appreciate what you’re trying to do, but my chance with Jackson ended a long time ago.”

  “But—”

  I shook my head, stopping her. “No buts. We have a long shift and I need to be able to focus on my job, not on all the what-ifs and what could’ve beens.”

  She watched me for a moment and sighed. “Okay. I get it. I just wish things were different. You deserve to be happy more than anyone I know.”

  “I wish it could be different, too.”

  We made our way to the nurses’ station to pick up our cases for the day. I managed to finish rounds with the night shift nurse who I would replace on shift without any distractions. All the patients were comfortable, so I took the time to sit down and update their files.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. When I pulled it out, I almost shoved it back in again. But like the glutton for punishment I was, I clicked on Jackson’s message.

  Jackson: Had fun last night. How about movie binge at my place on your next day off?

  I typed and retyped my answer so many times, I wondered if I actually sent it by accident. One word was about to change everything I had planned, torturing myself in ways I could avoid.

  Me: Yes

  And somehow I knew I would regret that answer sooner or later.

  18

  Megan

  I trudged up the stairs to my apartment. The only thing running through my head was how soft my bed would feel the moment my head hit it. The week after weekends on base were always more difficult. Where I would normally have two days off to recuperate from the twelve-hour days. On base weekends meant my time off was filled with more twelve-hour days.

  I unlocked the door and stepped through, shutting it behind me and turning on the light. Sun filtered through the blinds as I walked down the hall discarding clothes, keys, bags, anything I didn’t need onto the floor. I’d pick them up later.

  The sound of my phone ringing came from the front of my bag. Picking it up, I dug through the pocket and my fingers wrapped around the smooth exterior of it.

  “Hello,” I said, bringing the phone to my ear without checking the caller ID.

  “What would you say to hanging out with me and the rest of Jaded Ivory tonight? You can meet all the couples together.”

  “I just got home from work.” I practically whined.

  “Come on, it’ll be fun.”

  I rolled my eyes even though I knew Jackson couldn’t see me
through the phone. Multiple twelve-hour days following a weekend on base would have anyone ready to curl and sleep for days, but Jackson was determined. Never a good thing.

  “You know I haven’t slept more than four hours a night in over a week, right?” I asked, dropping my bookbag on the floor next to the door and trudging into the living room to flop down on the couch.

  “I know, but it also means I haven’t seen you in days. Plus, this will be fun. You can finally meet Allana, the woman who can tame Monty.”

  “And that’s something I still can’t believe.”

  “What?” he asked.

  “Someone actually having control over Monty.” I laughed.

  “Well, as he likes to put it, she has things to hold over his head the rest of us don’t.”

  “Okay, that was a visual I didn’t need.”

  “So, will you come? It’s super casual. We’re just hanging out at Mari’s place watching Cole’s game. Jeans and a T-shirt, that’s it. You don’t even have to stand around a bar. We can get cozy on the couch and eat.”

  A yawn slipped past my lips. “I don’t know, Jackson,” I said at the same time my stomach growled loud enough to be heard through the phone.

  “Come on. Think about it. No cooking.”

  I laughed. “You never cook unless you’re trying to kill someone.”

  “Ha. Very funny. But this isn’t me cooking, this is everyone else. Well, not Reagan. He cooks as bad as I do.”

  The idea of food did sound really good and I wouldn’t have to grab some kind of shitty takeout from around here. “Okay, I’ll go. Give me time to shower and get dressed.”

  “I’ll pick you up in a few.”

  The phone disconnected. That man always had a way of convincing me to do things I didn’t want to in the beginning. Like he had some kind of magical voice. Forcing myself off the couch, I stripped out of my scrubs on the way to the bedroom. Jackson said jeans and a T-shirt, so that’s what I pulled out and laid on the bathroom counter.

  Normally, I’d be freaking out about what I wore to meet his friends again, especially considering that everyone I knew would be losing their shit right now, if they knew where I was having dinner for the night. Not to mention the way I ran out of the club the last time I saw them. Exhaustion made me too tired to care. Even my eyelids felt like they weighed a hundred pounds.

  I stepped under the warm spray, letting the water do its job in waking me up. Water sluiced down my back as I washed my hair. There would be no time to do anything but dry it. Again, it was fine with me.

  After what seemed like too long in the shower, I stepped out, got dressed, and ran a brush through my hair.

  The light raps of knuckles on the door reached my ears from the living room. With the brush in hand, I went to let Jackson in.

  “Hey,” he said as the door opened and I came into view. He pulled me into a hug. “I missed you. How was your weekend on base?”

  I shut the door behind him. “Long, but sometimes they are. Wasn’t much going on this weekend, so the time seemed to tick by really slow. How about your weekend?”

  Jackson flopped down on the couch. “Press tours are the worst. Everyone has a million questions, but unless it’s about the music I don’t want to answer.”

  I continued running the brush through my hair. “So don’t.”

  “Don’t I wish. If I do that they label me as a diva, an asshole, or a combination of the two. And I’m pretty sure with Monty’s shit we have enough time in the press. Most of the time I try to skirt around the questions.”

  “Does it always work?”

  “Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Depends on the reporter.”

  “That sucks.”

  He shrugged. “Yeah, but I’ve gotten used to it. Mind if I relax until you’re ready to leave?”

  I shook my head and threw my thumb over my shoulder in the direction of the bathroom. “Give me a few minutes to dry my hair.” I turned to walk back into my room but stopped to call over my shoulder. “The remote should be on the table somewhere if you want to watch TV while you wait for me.”

  He nodded and leaned forward to start searching through the mail I’d discarded there over the week to find the remote. I shut the bathroom door to keep the sound from traveling through the whole apartment.

  It took longer than I thought with my hair wetter than I anticipated, but I finally finished, threw on some light makeup, and walked back into the living room. Jackson had the TV playing in the background, some type of pregame show, while he played on his phone.

  “Ready to go?”

  His head snapped up. I guess he hadn’t realized I’d walked back out into the living room.

  “Yeah.” He patted all around where he sat, eventually pulling the TV remote from somewhere under his right leg. “Let’s get over there. I’m starved and I know you are too.”

  I placed a hand over my stomach as it chose that moment to answer for me. Jackson laughed and gestured toward the hall, leading me to the door. We stepped outside and I stopped to lock up. By the time I turned around, Jackson was already at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for me.

  “Your car or mine?”

  I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter to me.”

  He pulled a set of keys from his pocket. “I’ll drive in case you get too tired to drive home.”

  “I think that sounds perfect.”

  I followed him through the parking lot to the black Range Rover that sat in the visitor parking space closest to the stairs to my apartment. Jackson opened the passenger door, letting me climb in before he shut it behind me and moved around to the driver’s side. As he backed out of the space, I couldn’t help but glance at his profile. A strong jawline and lips I could remember being pressed to mine. The way they tasted as he slipped his tongue past my lips.

  The car lurched forward and I shook myself out of the memory. What Jackson and I once had no longer existed. I had to be happy with the friendship we were able to salvage from the ashes of our relationship. The feelings I had for him needed to stay buried deep down, because there was no way I’d give his friends any indication that I still loved Jackson. The last thing I needed was for one of them to tell him and break my heart all over again when he walked away from me when he couldn’t offer anything more than friendship.

  I turned slightly to watch the buildings fly by the passenger window as we drove down the street. Spending time with Jackson up to this point had been easy. The friendship we once shared quickly bloomed again. I shouldn’t have been surprised. It was the easy way we could talk to one another that helped grow our relationship in the first place. And maybe a part of me hoped the same thing would happen again. But I wouldn’t bet on hope. Hope could lead to heartbreak. A place I didn’t want to go again.

  “You falling asleep on me over there?”

  I glanced over at Jackson to see he’d pulled into a gated community. The first two houses beyond the gates were bigger than any home I could’ve imagined. Reality slammed into me. What had I gotten myself into?

  “No, just daydreaming,” I said, hoping he wouldn’t hear the panic in my voice as we passed mansion after mansion. Houses I would never dream of being able to afford.

  “About something good, I hope.” He winked at me and turned into one of the driveways. The house connected to it practically made my jaw hit the floor. The large stone structure with brightly lit windows had to be at least three stories high. It was surrounded by a well-manicured lawn and pristine landscaping. If that wasn’t enough, I would place bets that my entire apartment would fit in their driveway.

  Jackson put the car in park, but I couldn’t stop staring out the window at the house, if you could call it a house. Mansion probably fit better. Before I had the chance to school my features, Jackson was opening the passenger door.

  “Trust me, it’s more imposing than it looks. I promise, everyone inside is just as laid back as they were the other night.”

  Sucking in a deep breath, I stepped out of the car a
nd followed Jackson toward the door, winding my way through cars that had probably cost double my salary for the year. My pace slowed as a sense of being overwhelmed filled me. Jackson looped his arm through mine, keeping me moving. I glanced down at what I was wearing and suddenly the lack of caring I felt earlier evaporated with the glaring signs of wealth before me.

  “You look great. I promise no one is going to worry about your outfit. Most of the cars and gates are for protection as much as show. See all the tinted windows?”

  I glanced around and realized what he was talking about. “Yeah.”

  “Every one of these is designed to protect our privacy.”

  I hadn’t even realized the tint on the windows as Jackson drove down the street, not until I really thought about it. “Like yours?”

  He nodded and smiled. “Like mine. There’s a reason I live in a condo with someone manning the elevators. Mari and Cole have an even harder time with the paparazzi. The gated community seemed like the easiest way to keep them out and maintain some privacy.”

  The weight that had been pressing down on my shoulders lifted slightly. I’d seen enough pictures of them in the press over the years. “I don’t blame them for that.”

  “Nope. Just like the interviews, we have to keep up an appearance in public or they crucify us. Beyond the gates or an elevator, we can be ourselves. Trust me when I tell you, not one of us chose the place we lived with vanity in mind. Just practicality.”

  “That all makes a lot of sense.”

  “Jackson. Megan. What are you guys still doing out here?”

  Startled, I jumped and turned to see Mari standing in the doorway, her short blond hair in cute beachy waves as she held the door open and gestured for us to come inside.

  My heart leaped into my throat. Who knew how long she’d been watching us, or how much she’d heard of my mini meltdown? I wanted to smack myself in the head. Not really the second first impression I wanted to make on Jackson’s friends. Part of me wanted to bolt back to the car and peel out of the driveway never looking back, but a hand on my arm stopped me.