Aloft

by J F Rogers

  “Thank you for protecting the elephants.” Maili seemed to notice the onlookers and adjusted her hair to block her view.

  “Eh-hem.” Zakur scanned the crowd. “When I heard your army, I knew you’d prefer I hid them in the ravine and hope the fasgadair would pass through without realizing portions of our village were still intact.” His eyes lit up, and he danced a couple of steps. “Where’s my father?”

  Maili’s face fell.

  Zakur slowed. His face twitched as it morphed through many emotions. “Wh–what?”

  She squinted at the people around her and snatched Zakur’s hand. “Come with me.”

  He tripped in his reluctance to follow as Maili yanked him along, lumbering up the stairs behind her.

  Blinding white light crossed my vision, accompanied by a scorching pain at the back of my eyes and something evil. I blinked repeatedly, desperate to regain my sight. Declan had just been standing nearby. Was he still there? “Declan?”

  “Are you ill?” His voice closed in on my right.

  I reached out for him.

  He gripped my hand. “What’s happening, Fallon? Should I fetch the apothecary?”

  “No!” I said a little too forcefully. What if this is Morrigan’s doing? I didn’t want to call attention to myself and worry people. Whatever this was would go away as the headaches had.

  “Why not? What’s happening?”

  “I can’t see,” I whispered.

  “What?” He must’ve heard me right because he led me to something. “Here, sit.”

  I felt the air until my fingers contacted a rough log. Then I lowered myself.

  “Let me fetch the apothecary. I think he’s around here somewhere. Or Ji Ah. Maybe she can help.”

  “No.”

  “Why not? Are you getting better?”

  “I don’t want anyone to see me this way.”

  “Fallon, this is silly.” The log jostled as he rose. “We need to get you help. The selkie have other healers in their ranks too.”

  I groped for his arm and pulled him to sit. “I just—I just want to sit here for a minute.” Please, God. Please let my vision clear. What would I do if I couldn’t see?

  Another wave of blazing pain shot through my temples. I bent over, compressing my head as if it might split apart otherwise. Declan clutched my shoulder.

  Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God!

  What was happening? It was as if someone shot both sides of my head simultaneously. The steady jolt of pain lessened to twinges. Face down, I clutched my head as tears fell to the ground. Declan spoke in a whisper. I couldn’t make out the words, but it sounded like he was praying.

  The pain eased, and I sat up. Dancing lights obscured my view of a cloudy forest. “I think my vision is coming back.”

  As my eyesight came into focus, so did a niggling sensation at the back of my mind. Whatever it was, it bothered me. I shuddered.

  “What’s happening? Can you see?”

  “I can. But something is wrong.”

  ****

  A scream rang out, sending fresh throbs surging through my head. I groaned and tried to pull myself up. The tent was dark, but a campfire outside revealed the outlines of my mother, Maili, Rowan, and Ji Ah sitting up on their bedrolls.

  “What was that?” I whispered.

  My mother, Cataleen, stood and threw on her cloak. “Stay put.”

  We sat in complete silence for eons. Finally, shuffling feet and hushed voices broke the void.

  “What happened?” I asked, holding my breath when Cataleen returned.

  She lit the lantern without a match and sat on her bedding without removing her cloak. She trembled. “Six of our watchmen are dead.”

  “What?” The rest of us turned to each other. Their masks of disbelief and shock probably matched my own. “How?”

  “Fasgadair slit their throats.” My mother clutched her cloak tight around herself.

  A chill sweeping through me, I shivered. “What? Are they following us? How’d they know not to bite the guards?”

  Cataleen stared at me, her eyes vacant. “They knew. Somehow… ”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  ◊◊◊

  I LAY ON MY bedding inside the tent, shaking with a cold sweat. Kai wiped my forehead, concern lacquering his mahogany eyes. Part of me wanted to get up and ease his burden. Another part wanted to smack the look from his face. I shuddered at whatever prompted such unwarranted thoughts, wishing to push it out of my system. But it persisted.

  Aside from the flulike symptoms, something was wrong. Impressions that weren’t my own invaded my thoughts. Like when I dreamed, Alastar’s feelings permeated my mind but a little more distant. But yesterday, with the blindness, something changed. It wasn’t a faraway feeling while I slept. Something lurked under the surface, something evil. I couldn’t shake it, even when I was awake.

  Whatever this is, God, please make it go away.

  I tried to shift myself, but my limbs weighed a thousand tons. My body ached. “Why is it so cold?”

  “It’s not.” Kai wiped hair away from my forehead. “And you have a blanket. This illness gives you a chill.”

  I shivered hard enough to make my teeth chatter and clutched the blanket. “Where is everyone?”

  “Ji Ah went to fetch a healer. Your mother and Rowan are making plans with the leaders. I’m not sure of Maili’s whereabouts.”

  Ji Ah entered the tent and held the flap. A male selkie, presumably the healer, carried a steaming mug. “Lift her,” he commanded Kai.

  Kai squeezed himself behind my head to elevate me.

  “What is this?” I eyed the man.

  “Medicine,” the man said. “It will help.”

  “He’s a healer. A good one,” Kai promised.

  The man gathered his robe and knelt beside me, then brought the mug to my lips. The crinkles around his brown eyes gave him the appearance of smiling, but his lips pressed into a thin line over the finger-length strands of black-and-white hairs protruding from his chin. “Drink.” He tipped the cup.

  Hot liquid sloshed into my mouth. The excess ran down my chin. It tasted like roasted fungus in swamp water thickened with pureed earthworms. I tried to push the mug away, but the healer persisted.

  “Just a little more.” He tipped more liquid into my mouth.

  The so-called medicine’s boggy scent made it taste worse. I tried not to breathe as the thick liquid slurped down my tongue. A sudden urge to spit the broth into his face overwhelmed me. I swallowed hard to keep from giving in to the impulse.

  The healer mercifully removed the mug and placed it on the dirt floor. “Make sure she finishes that.”

  I’ll make sure to finish you.

  Where did that thought come from?

  Kai jostled me as he nodded. “Thank you, uncle.”

  The healer patted Kai’s knee. “It’s good to have you back, son.” He stood with a groan, then left the tent with Ji Ah trailing.

  “That’s your uncle?” Chattering teeth played castanets to my question. Part of me was curious as another part groaned with disinterest.

  “No. He was a close friend of my family. Selkie address people depending on familiarity. Close adults address the younger as son or daughter, even if they’re not a parent. If I were closer, I might call him father. If I wasn’t familiar at all, I’d call him sir. Given our familiarity, I call him uncle.”

  “Oh.” That was confusing. “Names are much easier. Will I offend the selkie if I use their name?”

  Offend them. Offend them all.

  “Not at all. We come from different cultures. They understand as I’m sure you do.”

  The tent flap opened, sending a breeze. My mother’s face appeared. “How do you feel?”

  Kai lifted me, eased his way off the mat, and replaced my makeshift pillow of rolled-up T-shirts under my head. My head swam as I adjusted myself.

  Cataleen knelt and touched my
forehead. “You’re burning up.”

  “I’m freezing.”

  She motioned to Kai. “There must be a spare blanket among the supplies. Please find one.”

  I shivered violently.

  “Or more.”

  He disappeared outside the tent.

  “’Tis not appropriate to be alone in a tent with him.”

  Really? That’s what worried her right now?

  She sat beside me, pulling the covers to one side. If only I had the strength to push her off. “I’m sorry. That’s not the main concern at the moment.”

  You think?

  “Tell me what happened.”

  I didn’t want to talk to her, especially after that ignorant intro. But I was desperate to get well. And how would I live with myself if I single-handedly stalled the mission? We needed to get moving.

  She can’t help you.

  Where were these thoughts coming from? Whatever it was, it wasn’t God. I couldn’t trust it. If it was so sure my mother couldn’t help, then she probably could. “I got one of those awful headaches yesterday. The worst yet. It blinded me for a few minutes. My headache isn’t as bad now, but I feel like I have a flu.” And I think I’m possessed. Was anyone around here qualified to perform an exorcism?

  “You went blind?” Cataleen pushed my hair over my ear, her eyebrows squeezed together as she frowned. Other gachen have purple eyes, but we also had the same upturned, almond shape. How old was she? In her forties? Her face was still smooth. If she had any grays, they were impossible to detect amongst all the blonde. Would I look as good at her age? Probably not. With black hair, gray would shine like a lit jack-o’-lantern on a dark night. “Why didn’t you tell me this yesterday?”

  I tried to shrug.

  “Is there anything else?”

  Should I tell her?

  “What is it?”

  Seriously, could she read my mind? Or was this a supernatural mom ability? “I feel like I’m bathing in evil.”

  Cataleen yanked her hand away as if she might get infected and straightened.

  A breeze brought our attention to the door.

  Kai stepped through. “I found blankets.” He dropped two on my mother’s belongings and unfolded one.

  My mother stood to help cover me with the blanket. “Goodness, child, you should have had more than that thin blanket last night. The nights are growing colder.”

  “I was fine.”

  “Mmmhmm. Kai, will you please find Sully?”

  Searing pain shot behind my eyes, and my vision went white as my body convulsed.

  “Fallon!” Kai called.

  Hands gripped me, someone sat on me, holding my arms as my legs flopped. Someone else gripped my head, keeping it from slamming against the ground. Finally, I stilled.

  Kai touched my cheek. The earlier concern had grown into full-blown terror.

  “Please,” Cataleen begged. “Get Sully. Now!”

  Kai lowered me back down and threw me one last look. “I’ll be right back.” He dashed away.

  ****

  I must’ve dozed off. A rattling cough woke me. Sully was sitting cross-legged on my mother’s bedding beside me, pocketing a handkerchief, speaking in hushed tones with my mother. My head didn’t hurt at all. All my aches were gone. But I was warm. Too warm.

  “It may be our only choice.” Sully’s voice was raspier than normal.

  “But how can we—”

  “What’s going on?” I asked, pushing the blankets off me. How many were there? Three. No wonder I was so warm.

  “So—” Sully coughed, then cleared his throat. He reached across the divide toward me. “Sorry we woke you, child.”

  I helped him along by grabbing his hand.

  His liver-spotted hands clasped mine in his. They were cold. “Your mother told me about your sickness—the temporary blindness, the headache, and the fever. But what is this evil sensation? Can you explain that?”

  I looked into his gray eyes, no longer disgusted or unnerved by their appearance. Now, I saw Sully and felt nothing but love for this unusual man. His presence calmed me. I needed him. I shivered. “I can’t explain it.”

  My mother gathered a blanket I’d shoved aside and placed it back over me. “Try. Anything you say may help.”

  I searched my mind for foreign thoughts and feelings. “I think it’s gone now. Whatever it was.”

  Sully and Cataleen exchanged glances, even though Sully can’t see. Their shoulders relaxed, and they deflated as if they’d been holding their breath. Though their faces weren’t as tense, worry lines still crinkled their foreheads. “Can you remember what it felt like?”

  I released Sully’s hand and pushed myself up to sit, wrapping the blanket around my shoulders. “It was like something else was in my mind with me. Something evil.”

  Sully touched Cataleen’s arm. “You say she convulsed at the mention of my name?”

  When my mother nodded, he gave a noisy exhale and folded his hands in his lap. “I guess we now know Morrigan’s plan.”

  Again, she nodded. “In part.”

  “Hmm.” Sully tugged on his beard.

  “What?” I must be misunderstanding. “Is Morrigan taking over my mind?”

  My mother wrapped an arm around me. “I’m afraid so. That’s likely why she needed strands of your hair. It seems she’s found the secret to the mind-link between Aodan and me.”

  I pushed away. “But that can’t be.”

  “’Tis true, child.” Sully patted my knee. “This is a spelled version of the mind-link as opposed to the not-so-natural link the twins had… or the weaker versions you had with your uncle and brother in your dreams, so there are differences from what you experienced with them.” He sat back, a deep, rattling breath vibrating in his chest. “This explains why there was no army met us along the shore. And why the fasgadair picked off our watchmen last night.”

  “So, it’s my fault? Those men died because of me?” Morrigan was using me as a spy? Stacking events in her favor to do the most damage and enslave me in the process? My stomach twisted like a contortionist. I pulled myself up, ready to—ready to what? Launch myself off a bridge so I couldn’t do any more damage?

  “Did you kill those men?” His gray, sightless eyes seemed to stare into my soul. “Morrigan ordered those men killed. Morrigan is infesting your mind. This is Morrigan’s doing. Not yours.”

  Always the voice of reason. I crisscrossed my legs. “What do you mean not so natural? Do you know what caused the mind-links to begin with?”

  “Dear one, the mind-links, the ability to start fires… Fasgadair blood caused them.”

  “What?” The man must be getting batty in his old age. “That’s not possible. I was never a fasgadair.” I motioned to my mother. “Neither was she. Right?”

  “Right.” She squeezed my hand. “Nonetheless, fasgadair blood courses through our veins.”

  I yanked my hand away. “No. It’s not possible.”

  “My father, your grandfather, was bitten. The demon tried to turn him, forcing him to drink fasgadair blood. He miraculously escaped the fasgadair and spat out most of the blood. But not all. We assume the incomplete transformation into a fasgadair both kept him alive temporarily and slowly killed him. He died about a year later.”

  “Your mother and Aodan were conceived during that time.” Sully straightened his back with a groan.

  I hugged my legs. “So, you mean to tell me, my grandfather was somewhere in between a human and a fasgadair? All this time, I’ve had demon blood in me? Then how does it redeem fasgadair? Why didn’t Aodan’s? Or Declan’s? Or Alastar’s? How did they become fasgadair if they share my blood?”

  “That will always be a mystery. All I can say to that is because God willed it to be so.” Sully’s voice sounded like he had another frog in it.

  “I thought the fire-starting ability was a gift.” The ships I’d burned pervaded my mind. “Am I cursed?�
� Cursed sounded more accurate than gifted. It would explain my life.

  “We’re all cursed.” Sully coughed. He retrieved a handkerchief from his pocket as he continued, each cough deeper with more rattling than the last.

  “Are you okay?” I asked.

  He nodded and wiped his mouth. Folding and pocketing the cloth, he cleared his throat. “We live in a broken world that suffers from sin. But God has a plan, and He uses it all for good for His children. You, dear one, are one of His children. Fear not.”

  “Fear not? How can you even suggest that at a time like this? Morrigan has access to my mind. Is she gone now? Will she return? Can she take it over whenever she wants?”

  “Morrigan probably disconnected when she heard I was being summoned.” The creases around Sully’s eyes deepened. “She isn’t fond of me.”

  “That’s an understatement.” My mother puffed air out her nose.

  I gawked at these two. How could they laugh at a time like this? Morrigan was using me like a pawn. I’d already lost our weapons, and now, I’d become a tool for the enemy like the time I’d scored a touchdown for the opposing team in gym class, but worse. Way worse. “Will Morrigan take over my mind again when you leave? What will happen to us? What will happen to me?”

  Sully’s face grew somber. A much more appropriate expression given the circumstances. “I’m sure she’ll attempt to control you again.”

  “Should I go back to my realm? Isn’t that why my mother went there in the first place? To hide from Aodan?”

  “Not this time, child. Now is the time to stay and fight. Things always get worse before they get better. And if we’re to eliminate Morrigan, we’ll need you. We must be more careful.” He pursed his lips. “We may need to blindfold you to keep her from knowing where we are. And you must learn to block your thoughts.”

  Block my thoughts? That’s like asking me to stop breathing. My mind did its own thing. “That’s impossible.”

  “It requires diligence, but it’s possible. Think of someone you care about. Keep their image in your mind. Recall a pleasant time with them.”

  “How can I focus when I have Morrigan in my head distracting me?”

  “Pray and trust. I will stay close. But an even better protection would be to ensure you’re connected to God.”