by Hailey Smoke
“Hello?”
“Taylor your mother has called me crying. What did you say to her?” He demanded.
I ground my teeth as I considered how I was going to respond. Everything seemed to have to happen today.
“I told her to never visit and that I would get a restraining order if she didn’t listen,” I said the truth calmly. I didn’t regret anything I told her that morning.
“How can you say something like that to the person who raised you?”
He wouldn’t be able to understand if all he thought was that we got into an argument over ten years ago. “Jiji. When I was a teenager, she abused me. I don’t want her around me or my future family.”
He was silent over the line. I thought he was processing what I told him. Instead I heard him sigh. “I had...my suspicions.”
My blood turned to ice. “What?”
“But I think that your mother has changed from so long ago,” he explained.
“You knew.” Part of my world was falling apart.
“Not exactly.”
“No, you just said you were suspicious, but you did nothing. I lived through that for years years and you could have done something about it. I was a kid you were supposed to be the adult. You let it happen.” I swallowed down my building rage. “Don’t ever bring Hana to see me again. And if you don’t want your reputation at my company tarnished, I would suggest limiting contact with me after you retire.”
“Taylor, you’re being unreasonable.” He sounded just like her. “She’s your mother, my daughter.”
“I’m your grandson.” But I knew now he picked his daughter over me years ago. All I was good for was making more heirs for his empire, I could do that for him even broken into pieces as I was. “Goodbye, Mr. Hirano.” I hung up the phone and put my phone in my pocket.
I stepped back inside. I smiled to cover up how shaken I was, but I found the smile settling as I sat back down. More and more weights were floating away. My father looked excited to see me, even though I had just gone. He looked like he couldn’t believe I was here.
I had cut out everyone in my life who didn’t care for me and I was left with so many people who did. I never expected to have so many, I didn’t ever think I would deserve it.
“What did he want?” Lydia asked.
“Oh. It was all just business. I’ll tell you about it later.”
Chapter 17: Lydia
Taylor was different. He didn’t change into a new person who suddenly was a graceful speaker and never worried. But I could tell in the little ways that he was changed somehow. He stood up straighter and he did speak a lot freer.
He was explaining a big project he was working on as he transitioned from Vice President to CEO of Hirano Enterprises. He was even getting into it. Usually when we talked about work, he preferred to listen to me speak, and wouldn’t want to talk very long about what he was doing.
“You seem so excited about it,” I said when he finished his explanation.
“I am,” he looked away, slightly embarrassed. He probably didn’t even notice how much he was speaking until I brought it up. It was adorable.
We started to go out more and more. He suggested inviting Virgo and Michael several times without me bringing them up. Standing up to his mom, and as he told me later, his grandfather was the right thing for him to do. We talked about it during our last couples’ therapy session.
“It’s obvious you trust each other,” Mr. Tupp said. “As long as you keep respecting each other’s boundaries. I see a long, happy relationship.”
“So that’s how you graduate therapy,” I said. “Do we get a certificate?”
Mr. Tupp laughed. “I’ll see what I can do.”
After we got home from our final session, we had dinner and then went to the pool room. We both obviously needed practice since Virgo was able to beat us pretty handily.
I lined up a shot. “We should challenge them to a couples’ game. Michael is awful at it. It’ll be like a handicap for Virgo.”
“Crafty.” Taylor said and put his hand on my ass as I leaned over to take my shot.
He had also gotten exponentially more physically affectionate with me. He initiated more often as well. There were still rough days, but they were happening every few weeks instead of days.
Too distracted, I missed my shot. I glared up at him. “That’s cheating.”
He shrugged a more playful form of his smile appearing on his face. “All is fair in love and pool.”
When he took his shot, I leaned close to his ear and right as he was about to hit the pool ball, I blew hot air into his ear. He missed too. He set the pool stick down and faced me with hunger in his eyes. “Lydia. I can’t be patient for much longer.”
He looked at me with so much love and desire that something inside me felt moved. I had to tell him now. If I didn’t tell him now, I would explode. “Taylor. I have to tell you something important.”
“Yes, dear?” His mouth curled around the endearment, making my legs weak.
“Taylor. I’m pregnant.”
I waited for his response. His eyes went wide, and he backed up a step from me. I felt my heart begin to drop. This was a bad idea. He didn’t want kids after all.
My train of thought was interrupted when he surged forward and took me into his arms. He dipped me like we were tango dancing and captured my mouth in a deep kiss. I felt all of my anxieties melt away as we melted into each other.
He helped me back up. “Really?” He asked, almost out of breath.
“Yeah. Turns out birth control isn’t perfect,” I laughed a little still nervous.
“It’s a surprise,” he said as he put a hand on my belly. “But surprises are good.”
“I love you Taylor, I love you,” I said it over and over again. Taylor surprised me at how happy he could make me.
“We’re going to start a family. And we’re going to be the best parents that little one could ever ask for,” he promised touching our foreheads together.
“You’re going to spoil them.”
“Is that so wrong?” He asked and leaned into me again like we were dancing. We swayed around the pool room for a moment. We just needed to be in each other’s warmth.
Slowly we made our way over to the wall, Taylor guiding me. I found myself pushed against the wall by his strong grip. He kissed up from my collarbone to ear, nibbling slightly on my earlobe. His leg pushed into my center. I felt my heat flutter at the contact.
“In here?” I crooked an eyebrow playfully.
He nodded, lust burning his gaze. “Can’t wait.”
I desperately wanted him too. I would get Taylor to help me clean up in here after. The housekeeper didn’t deserve to deal with how much he needed me.
I felt him grow hard through his jeans and it caused butterflies in my stomach.
“Taylor.” I tugged at his shirt weakly.
He pulled it off in one motion and tossed it onto the pool table. He then pulled off my shirt and bra just as quickly. He yanked down my skirt and panties soon after. I was naked before him, pressed up against the wall, ready for whatever he wanted to do to me.
He grinded into me as he bit at my mouth in another deep maddening kiss. I ran my hands up and down his arms while his hands kept a grip on my head, leaned back slightly against the wall.
“Do what you want with me,” I whispered. I wanted to give up control this time around, to just be lost in the rush of feelings.
“As you wish.” He raised his hands to my mouth. “Suck on them.”
I took the order and let his right pointer and middle finger into my mouth. I bobbed my head back and forth on them until they were slick with my saliva. Slowly, he drew his fingers out of my mouth. I got myself ready for what was going to happen.
He started slow, easing his fingers into my folds and then up into my cunt. I arched my back into the wall. “Faster,” I begged.
He immediately slowed down, easing his two fingers in and out at a snail’s pace.
“Bastard,” I managed to say between harsh, quick breaths.
In response he thrust them deep inside me and let his thumb brush against my clit sending a tingling through me to my toes. I nearly came just from that, but I still needed another push.
“Deeper, please, Taylor,” I moaned.
This time he listened to me. He thrust up as far as he could go over and over. The harder he thrust, the harder he rubbed my clit. With one last thrust I was coming apart in front of him. My throat was exposed as I arched back feeling the waves. He saw the opening and began to nip at my throat and peppering kisses. I couldn’t help but to giggle furiously. My mind struggled to keep up with every sensation. I felt overstimulated but I loved it.
As I finally regained my footing, I realized that Taylor was holding me up. He smirked when he realized I was back. He rubbed his fingers, slick with my own juices, over my breasts. Every touch made me jump, I was so sensitive.
Taylor turned me around and slowly backed me up away from the wall and then bent me over one of the pool tables. My sensitive nipples rubbing the green felt causing them to get even harder.
“I’m going to fuck you Lydia,” he announced, as he dug his fingers into my bent hips. He let go and I heard the sound of his buckle being undone as well as the sound of his zipper.
Even though I felt spent, his declaration caused the heat to begin to build back up. Since I couldn’t see, the anticipation of his cock inside of me made my heart beat faster and faster.
He teased at my entrance a few times but didn’t fill me like I suddenly desperately needed. “God, you’re beautiful,” he said, and I flushed at the comment.
He caught me off guard with the praise and slammed into me, filling me all at once. I cried out as he thrust back and forth, hitting a spot he didn’t reach earlier.
“You’re mine,” he growled.
I could barely understand him, I was so deep in pleasure from the last orgasm and now my building second.
He thrust in and out, taking his time. But I knew how impatient he would get. Soon he was thrusting faster and deeper. He groaned as he spilled into me. As he rode his orgasm, he leaned down into me and buried his face into my shoulder.
He reached around and started playing with my nipples as he withdrew from me. He suddenly flipped me over so I could finally see him. He leaned over me and we started to kiss as one hand played and pinched my nipples while the other teased my overly sensitive clit.
“Taylor!” I yelled as I came once again over his hands. After that one I truly felt like I was floating. It took me several deep breaths to climb down back into my body. When I did, I smiled up at Taylor, my lover, my husband, the father of our child. “We’re going to have to clean up.”
He rolled his eyes but smiled. “In a moment.”
He picked me back up and we gave each other small, gentle kisses. Not as deep, but just as sweet.
***
We cleaned up and then went to bed to cuddle.
Taylor had left his phone upstairs and checked it once we got in his room. He sighed at it once he clicked it on.
“What is it?” I asked as he sat beside me in bed, I hung my arms over his shoulders and rested them together on his firm chest.
“My grandfather has called me ten times in the past hour.” He shook his head. “I told him last time he tried to call me after our ‘conversation’, that he’d realize calling me won’t change my mind. Nothing he says will.”
He set his phone on the side table and tackled me into bed. I laughed as he kissed at my neck again. I had to find out where he was ticklish to use against him, it wasn’t fair.
He leaned forward and kissed my belly. “I can’t believe we’re going to have a kid.”
“Maybe more,” I mused, “My mom and aunt were twins. It runs in the family.”
“No matter how many, I’m excited.” He kissed my belly once more before moving back to be the big spoon.
“Virgo already claimed being the godmother. I’m going to have to tell Michael and my aunt next,” I said, planning it all out.
“Tell her at Christmas next week,” he grunted.
I had forgotten how close the holiday was. We had been working hard for February fashion week and December had flown by. “Our whole family will be there and I can tell everyone at once.”
“Tell everyone our family is getting bigger.” He snuggled closer and I felt myself feel so safe and calm I began to dip into sleep.
I wasn’t sure how long we slept. But I was woken up, with the room around me completely dark, to the sound of persistent ringing. “Taylor.” I shook at him, my eyes still clouded with sleep.
“What?” he asked, still refusing to open his eyes. He looked grumpy with his eyebrows furrowed and it was adorable.
“Get your phone.” I shoved him playfully towards the side table then curled back up and closed my eyes.
“Fine.” He turned away and I felt him sit up slightly in bed. “My grandfather called six more times.” He sighed sleepily. “Oh.” He sounded slightly more awake. “My father called as well, a few moments ago.”
“That could be important,” I said and turned around to curl next to him as he returned the call. I wonder what his dad wanted?
“Hello?” Taylor said when he picked up. I couldn’t hear his dad, only his muffled voice.
“I’m sitting down?” Taylor's voice grew suspicious. I was starting to wake up more and more, something like worry settling in my gut.
I heard his father’s voice say something unintelligible over the line and Taylor didn’t respond.
I was getting nervous. I opened my eyes and looked up at him. “Taylor?”
He didn’t respond.
I got up slightly. “Taylor?”
I saw him swallow heavily. “I understand,” he said into the phone, “I’ll talk to you about that tomorrow. Yes. Thanks for letting me know.”
He hung up and let the hand holding the phone fall heavily to his side. I couldn’t tell by looking at his face in the darkness what he was feeling.
“What did your dad want?” I asked, concern showing in my voice.
He looked at me, something unknowable in his eyes. “It’s Hana.”
“What happened?”
“She killed herself. She’s dead.”
Chapter 18: Taylor
“Don’t ask me how this makes me feel.” I was sitting in front of Mrs. Tupp’s desk for once instead of pacing around. I didn’t feel like I needed to today.
“Why’s that?” She asked, her voice more subdued than usual.
“Because I’m going to tell you. You don’t have to ask.” I knew I was stalling a little. “She’s dead. Ding dong, and everything else, you know how the song goes.”
“So, you’re saying you’re happy?” She asked.
“Happy isn’t the right word.” I think about the wrongness of that word. Nothing about thinking about her had ever been related to happiness. There wasn’t a single memory of her that made me happy.
I didn’t remember a lot about my childhood. My clearest memory of when my parents were still together, and the earliest memory I had, I remembered I had been sent to my room. I think I did something wrong. What it was is completely lost to me. I remember hearing them argue downstairs. I didn’t understand exactly what they were talking about, but I knew somehow that they were arguing about me.
“What word would you use?” Mrs. Tupp asked, pulling me out of the memory.
I had been thinking about my past a lot since I got the call. It wasn’t like before, where I would lose myself in the past and have to be forcibly pulled back with careful touches and practiced words. It was like I was finally examining it, like I was a scientist, unafraid of what I would find. “I would call it, relief? No. I would call it inevitability.”
“Can you explain further?”
“I always knew she would be gone. I had hoped for it at my darkest moments. But before she died, just a few days ago, I told her she would
n’t hurt me again. And even if she hadn’t died, I already knew that was true. She was never going to touch me again and now she never will. It was inevitable that I would have to face these emotions. But I’m not going to let her haunt me. I already decided I was done with her.”
“I’m glad you were able to stand up to her,” Mrs. Tupps said, smiling in a way that was both happy and sad.
“Thanks,” I said a little lamely, not sure what else to say.
“How was the funeral?” She asked.
The funeral. “Well…” I began.
***
“Are you sure we should go?” Lydia asked, adjusting my black tie.
“No,” I admitted. “But my father asked me to go. I don’t think he wants to be there alone.”
She pressed her mouth into a thin line and began dusting off my suit of any lint she could see. I thought she had brushed at nothing quite a few times.
“You don’t have to come Lydia. You don’t owe anyone there anything. My father will be fine if it’s just me,” I said, taking her hand. She paused her ministrations.
“Oh, I’m going,” she replied, putting her other arm around me and pulling me in to her. “I don’t owe them, but I made a promise to you. I’m going to be there for you. If your grandfather tries to start something, he’s going to have to deal with me too.” She had a look in her eye that told me she was serious.
“You’d make a scene at a funeral for me?”
“Oh, I’d make a scene anywhere for you, Taylor,” she said with a wink.
It was weird. Even though we were about to leave for the funeral, I didn’t feel any tension like when I had visited her only two days before. I didn’t feel sad. I didn’t feel much of anything. I was ready to be there, stone faced, ready to receive condolences from distant family. I wasn’t going to announce to all these people who didn’t really know her about what she did to me. It felt pointless. If anything, it would just make her more memorable. I wanted her to fade into distant memory. But if my grandfather tried to blame me, I was ready and so was Lydia to make sure everyone knew what she did and how he had turned a blind eye. Our relatives all still loved Ikari, although it was probably everything to do with his money. If they didn’t believe us if it came to that; I couldn’t bring myself to care. They weren’t my family.