Gravel Road

by Walls, Stephie

  His warm-brown eyes peered through tiny slits, and a lazy smile turned up his lips. “Mornin’.” That lazy Southern drawl sent heat between my legs, and I pressed my thighs together to relieve the pressure.

  “Good morning,” I cooed.

  God, he was beautiful. I’d made it without him for six years, and yet lying here next to him, I couldn’t imagine enduring another day. The idea of him going back to Texas left a weight pressed against my ribs that made it difficult to breathe if I thought about it too long. And that led into the logistics of how we could ever make this work. And the high I’d started the morning with faded when Austin smiled.

  He propped his head in his hand. “What just happened?”

  The tears started before I could stop them, and I’d become a bumbling mess of incoherent thoughts and words.

  Austin propped himself against the pillows on the headboard and pulled me between his thighs. With my back to his, he dipped his face next to my ear and draped his arms around me. “What are the tears for?” The words were a whisper of concern and sentiment of love. The tips of his fingers ran the length of my forearms, calming my anxiety. “Talk to me.” Austin had always had a gentle soul, and that hadn’t changed.

  I sniffled and composed myself enough to be able to communicate everything that ran through my head. “I don’t know how this will work, and I can’t bring myself to say goodbye.”

  “Goodbye isn’t an option.” He paused, and the soft strokes of his hands kept me from getting irrational. “Do you remember the day your dad told you that your mom wasn’t coming back?” It was an odd thing to bring up given the topic at hand, but I nodded. “Do you remember the promise I made to you that day in the pasture?”

  Of course, I did. I hadn’t comprehended the weight of that commitment as a child, but I certainly did once we got older. “Yeah.” He’d held fast to that every day until I got on that bus.

  “Give me the chance to prove to you that I won’t let you down. Let me protect you.” There was no sign of the frustration I expected to hear. “Randi”—the sound of that nickname parting his lips in love healed a broken part of me—“sweetheart, it’s time to come home.”

  I needed to believe that. Everything in me told me to trust him. But my rational side doubted his ability to heal relationships he hadn’t broken. He couldn’t control the way I would be received in Mason Belle or how my father kept me at arm’s length. I could deal with the Charitys of the world; I couldn’t handle the distance that remained between Daddy and me. Sarah would welcome me, Rand had my back in the best way a three-year-old could. Brock might not have thought I picked up on his emotional struggle at The Hut when he faced defending me to his wife, but even drunk, I’d seen the sorrow in his eyes. He’d come around. And while I hadn’t seen Charlie when I was home, I had no doubt that he would follow Austin and Sarah’s lead. That only left Austin’s parents and Daddy. And all three were deal breakers.

  His chest was firm behind me when I leaned back and lay my head on his shoulder. Austin’s hands hadn’t stopped tracing patterns on my skin, and his touch held a magical power to calm my deepest fears. The only problem was, this didn’t affect just me. He had relationships with those three people as well, relationships he cherished and depended on.

  I hadn’t given him the chance to provide me with options six years ago, and if I wanted this to work, that meant I had to give him that opportunity now. The only way to do that was brutal honesty. “I want to, Austin…”

  “But?”

  “I can’t come between your parents and you, and I don’t think my dad will ever forgive me for my role in what happened to Sarah.” I shook my head. I hated to remember the look on his face when he tore apart my room or the rage and disgust that poured from him as he screamed at me. “He didn’t even hug me when I left last weekend. His feelings for me haven’t changed.”

  Austin pressed his lips below my ear and nibbled at my skin. The heat of his breath broke my focus, and I melted into him. He played me like a fiddle until I was putty in his hands. “My parents are not an issue. And Jack wants you home.” He teased my stomach with feather-like touches and peppered my neck with kisses.

  “You sure are confident for a man who hadn’t mentioned my name in six years.”

  He pulled back and stared at me with confusion, and I angled my face so he’d see my raised brow.

  “Sarah might have mentioned it,” I confessed with a shrug.

  He grinned. “We can talk about Sarah’s big mouth later.”

  I chuckled and relaxed against him.

  “The issue at hand is your dad. And I can tell you with absolute certainty that while he might not have a clue how to go about mending fences, he wants to.”

  I shuffled between his thighs to face him. There was no real room for me to sit cross-legged, so I put my feet over his legs and rested them on the mattress at his sides. To my knowledge, Austin had never lied to me, but I had seen him twist the truth with other people. His nose would scrunch, and he’d scratch his ear. I’d only be able to see his tells if I could see him. I didn’t prepare myself for his naked chest or how badly my body ached to touch his.

  Austin laughed, and it came from his belly. Each chortle caused his muscles to flex and me to inwardly groan. Sexual frustration was a bitch. “You have a horrible poker face, Randi.”

  I rolled my eyes and ignored that comment. “Tell me how you can be so sure Daddy wants me home.”

  The laughter died, although his smile did not. “That’s why he gave me the ranch.”

  “What?” He was close enough that I didn’t need to raise my voice; it was just my natural response to shock.

  He cupped my jaw and stole the air from my lungs with one kiss. “It didn’t make any sense to me at the time, and honestly, I thought the smoke had done damage to his brain that the doctors had missed.” I loved when he winked. “Now, I get it. You love Cross Acres, and I love you. Jack knew you’d never come back as long as it was his, but if it were mine, he was convinced I’d make it your home.”

  Someone needed to have Daddy’s mental faculties checked out. That was farfetched, even for a dreamer who loved romance. He wasn’t old enough to be senile, but Austin might be onto something with the smoke damage.

  He lifted my fingers to his mouth and kissed my knuckles while holding my gaze. “Please trust me.”

  Austin had never been able to tell me no, and it seemed the tides had turned. Despite my hesitation, the idea of a day without him hurt worse than facing the demons of my past. Daddy included. “Okay,” I whispered.

  “Okay?” He appeared more surprised by my answer than I was.

  I nodded and shrugged. “I trust you. But…you have to be the one to tell Eason.” I couldn’t keep a straight face.

  My head fell back when I laughed. Thinking about Austin asking Eason for permission tickled me until I was giddy.

  He poked his fingers into my ribs and trapped me between his legs, preventing any movement on my part. “You think that’s funny?”

  I did, but my joy didn’t just come from Austin messing with me or me kidding with him. It was that coupled with love, hope, forgiveness, and healing. My past, my present, and my future all had the chance at converging into a place that I’d be more than just content. It would be the best life could offer.

  Austin grabbed my hips, and he lifted me into his lap. With my knees at his sides, straddling his waist, he cradled my butt in his hands. “I promise, I’ll take care of you.”

  * * *

  Every inch of my body coiled, and each step I took required more effort than the last. I’d left Austin to explore New York—well, the bagel shop at the corner—while I went to have a conversation with my best friend and boss. My stiletto-clad foot slipped on the marble floors in the lobby, and an older gentleman kindly prevented my fall. Heat rose in my cheeks, and embarrassment gripped what little hold I had on reality.

  “Don’t worry, sweetheart. Happens to me all the time.” He lifted his h
and, and a nervous giggle passed my lips. Even at his age, he was spry, and I found humor in the cane he showed off with pride. I wondered if women found that attractive later in life, although I didn’t ask.

  Instead, I patted his hand and thanked him.

  He then shooed off my apology. “A girl as pretty as you, the pleasure was all mine.” Yeah, this guy definitely played the geriatric field.

  The man straightened his suit jacket, tipped his cane to the up arrow, and then pressed the button to call the car. I half expected him to bow before he excused himself. I imagined Eason at his age and giggled at how he’d work the ladies and the men.

  The ride to my floor ended as quickly as it had started. It left me no time to collect myself when the doors parted. Rachel greeted me with her usual exuberance and welcomed me back. The phones ringing, the murmur of voices, and the shuffle of paper reminded me that life here wouldn’t stop without my presence. It hadn’t in the weeks I’d been gone, and it wouldn’t in the future. Eason could replace me as a paralegal, and moving to Texas didn’t mean our friendship had to end.

  I’d miss the people I’d worked with, but there was nothing to keep me from visiting. And while I didn’t have a contingency plan if things didn’t work out with Austin, I was confident Eason would always have a place for me. Even still, I dreaded the conversation about to take place. My focus remained on the door at the end of the hall. I passed my own without so much as a sideways glance. The click of my heels matched the thump of my heart, and when I crossed into his office, it went from a steady rhythm to a thunderous roll.

  His secretary’s desk sat empty. I’d hoped for a distraction or even a deterrent. This was silly; Eason was my best friend. There was no need to be nervous, so I squared my shoulders and lifted my chin with confidence. My knock brought his answer, and I entered. I hadn’t planned to talk to two partners, but now I wouldn’t have to track Garrett down to rehash the same story.

  Eason stood from behind his ornate desk, and a blistering smile lit up his masculine features. “Hey, gorgeous. Glad to have you back.” He rounded the corner and met me in the middle of his office where he rocked me back and forth in a mammoth hug.

  “Let her go before you cut off her air supply.”

  I wiggled to lean around Eason and let my tongue hang out of the side of my mouth as if I were being squeezed to death in my confinement. “Help me,” I mouthed.

  He turned his back to me, adjusted himself in the chair, and said, “You’re on your own.” Garrett’s laid-back personality hadn’t changed with age or his relationship with Eason. They were the yin to each other’s yang.

  “I’ll remember that the next time you need a tie-breaking vote and I’m the decisionmaker,” I teased.

  My palms landed on Eason’s chest. I’d never figured out what his dress shirts were made of. They looked like linen and felt like satin under my fingertips when I pushed him back. “Isn’t this sexual harassment in the workplace? Let me go.”

  Garrett ignored my plea for freedom, still focused on losing the majority vote in our next family squabble. “Your loyalty should be to me.” He stared out the window, and while I couldn’t see his face, I could tell by his tone he was on the verge of pouting. “I’ve known you the longest.”

  “You’re also the biggest pain in her ass.” Eason motioned for me to take the seat next to Garrett, and he returned to his own. “I don’t think that tips the chips in your favor.”

  Garrett dropped his foot to the floor with a thud and leaned forward with his forearms on his knees. “Come to think of it, you both owe me. Without my charm and wit, and ability to spot a damsel in distress, neither of you would have met. So, by my estimation, you”—he glanced at Eason and then me—“and you have me to thank for years of beautiful friendship.”

  When it came to Garrett and his rationale, there was little I could do other than smile. He could argue with a lamp post and have a judge uphold the verdict when he took the inanimate object to court. It made him an incredible lawyer. It also made him an entertaining friend.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t home when your plane got in.” Eason made no attempt at a subtle shift in the conversation.

  Garrett laced his fingers behind his head and relaxed next to me. “I’m not. The Hamptons were fabulous.”

  If I’d had anything other than my purse to throw at him, I would have launched it at his head. The weight of my handbag might do actual damage. “You’re such a jerk.” He wasn’t; I just liked that he played the part. That trait made my fictional, office romance with Eason easy to believe, and it distracted from the fact that two of the partners were partners in more ways than one—a well-kept secret they’d both shared for as long as I’d known them.

  In a city like New York where people were free to be whomever they were designed to be, I hated admitting there were still those who could twist love—regardless of the couples’ gender—into a reason for hate. Unfortunately, Eason’s parents were old school and narrowminded, and Garrett’s were Southern and ignorant, leaving both men to hide their relationship. I worried what my departure would do to them without me as a buffer with their families and here at work.

  “Miranda?” Garrett waved his hand in front of my face. “Where’d you go?”

  I hadn’t realized I’d gotten lost in thought and missed whatever they’d said. “Sorry.” Sitting here and dragging this out wouldn’t change the outcome. “I need to talk to you.”

  Garrett perked up, excited to be included in what he presumed to be a proverbial “you.” “Me too?”

  “Sure, why not? I’m going to have to tell you, anyhow.”

  Garrett scowled, and Eason grinned. I narrowed my eyes at Eason. He wasn’t making this any easier by keeping Garrett riled up. Eason raised his hands, pulled an invisible zipper across his lips, and tossed away the key.

  Garrett crossed his legs, angled his body toward me, and gave me his undivided attention. His bare ankles peeked out from under the hem on his slacks. For someone who’d been in the Hamptons, his legs hadn’t gotten any color. “Did you not do your laundry?”

  Eason leaned over his desk and shook his head, although he didn’t seem the least bit surprised.

  “I’m not a fan of socks.” He bounced his foot, drawing more attention to his blinding-white legs. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

  My palms were wet with sweat, and my mouth was dry. No matter how many times I adjusted my position in the chair, I couldn’t get comfortable. “I-I, umm…” I needed to spit it out. “Austin…” Nothing came together in a coherent thought or intelligible sentence. “When I was in Texas…” I had started and stopped so many times I wasn’t sure what I even came here to say.

  Thick lines of concern marred Eason’s brow. “Did something happen after I left?” His normal baritone dropped into a deep bass, and the smooth tone turned dark.

  The incident at The Hut didn’t bear repeating, and he’d witnessed Austin’s interaction with me, so there was no need to regurgitate that information for Garrett. Eason had likely already filled him in, anyhow. “Austin flew into town last night.”

  “Okay…” Eason let that word hang in the air, and Garrett looked like he wanted a bucket of popcorn for the show he anticipated.

  I stared into a sea of stormy grey and prayed the next sentence out of my mouth didn’t hurt the one friend who’d been there when life had given me nothing other than lemons. It was hard to make lemonade without sugar. “I need to put in my notice.”

  Garrett’s jaw dropped; unfortunately, he hadn’t been stunned into silence. Quite the opposite. “You’re resigning? Do you plan to move back to Texas? You haven’t even seen these people in years, and now you’re going to uproot your life to go back to the sticks? Are you insane?”

  “Garrett!” Eason’s voice boomed. The open door didn’t lend any privacy, and I was certain that Eason didn’t care for the entire office to get a play by play. Once he’d successfully quieted his boyfriend, he returned his attention
to me, and his expression softened. “Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

  I bit into my bottom lip and nodded. “Yes.”

  “I’m proud of you.” Not the reaction I had expected. “When are you leaving?”

  I hadn’t wanted to hurt him, but I hadn’t thought he’d push me out the door, either. I expelled a bit of nervous laughter. “Sounds like you’ve already got my position filled and my bedroom rented.”

  “Nah, Garrett hasn’t been allowed to take any more solo road trips since he returned with you. And I’ve banned him from all travel by bus. I’m too old for more strays.”

  My feelings shouldn’t be hurt. Nevertheless, they were. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t my man, he was a man, and every woman needed the men in her life to fight for her, not open the door and push her out. And his attempt at being cute didn’t soften the blow.

  “Miranda, I’m kidding.” He got up and came around the desk. Eason leaned against the wood and crossed his ankles. When he gripped the edge so tightly that his knuckles lost their color, I recognized that this wasn’t any easier for him than it was for me. He simply attempted not to make it harder. “I’ve been trying for years to get you to reconcile with your family. I didn’t expect that Austin would be part of that, but really, I’m not surprised. I’ve got motormouth over there to keep me company”—Garrett’s attempt at an objection was overruled—“and I want you to be happy. New York was never a permanent gig for you.” He’d tried to tell me that for years.

  “You’re not mad?”

  The corners of Eason’s mouth turned down when he shook his head. “Of course not. I’ve always wanted to buy a house in south Texas.” He winked, yet I wasn’t certain he was kidding.

  Garrett interjected, “You’re on your own, McNabb. I’m not interested in mosquitos and the smell of manure. I got enough of that growing up.” It was easy to forget that Garrett had grown up an hour down the road from Mason Belle since he never went back, either.

  Eason ignored him. “Miles between friends just mean more phone calls and vacation time. I’m good with both.” He appeared to be finished, and then he added in one final point. “But if you need me—here or there—don’t hesitate. I’ll be at your side without question.”