This Wandering Heart

by Janine Rosche

  She pressed a fist to her lips and blinked hard. Cassie was clearly used to getting her way. She lowered her fist and focused her attention on the papers. “A few days, then. I think your changes are perfectly reasonable. They’d be foolish not to accept them.”

  “And what happens if they don’t?”

  “Then we’ll try mediation. A neutral party will meet with you and Vivian in hopes of finding common ground. If that doesn’t work, there will likely be a preliminary hearing to determine next steps.” Cassie withdrew a paper from her briefcase. She slid it across the table to Robbie. “Like I said, this consult was free, but here’s my fee schedule.”

  He stopped breathing while he did the math. She scratched out the first line with her pen. “You know I’ve always liked you, Robbie. And I hold a great deal of respect for you and your family, so I’m willing to forgo my own income on this case. Still, I have to keep the lights on and pay my assistant. A typical case like this requires around five hours per week, but depending on how long Vivian is willing to drag this out, that could go for a considerable amount of time. Do you have the funds to pay for this?”

  He opened his mouth to list all the internal organs he’d be willing to sell, but Keira’s voice called out. “Yes, he does.”

  Robbie looked her way.

  Keira stepped closer. “What about him taking Anabelle out of Montana in the interim? Why did that letter from the lawyer say he couldn’t?”

  “It’s not uncommon for exes to try to sabotage my clients’ ability to work or form new relationships. She probably demanded he put that into the paperwork—that you couldn’t travel out of state with Anabelle. But it has no legal bearing.” Cassie looked between the two of them. “I imagine there may be bitterness or jealousy at fault. I’ll call Lex Cartwright and inform him that your travel will not be hindered.”

  “Why would he listen to you?” Robbie asked.

  “Because I know things.” Cassie’s lips curled as she packed her paperwork into her briefcase. “Let’s just say his son’s 2.3 grade point average wasn’t the reason he got into Yale Law.”

  Robbie walked Cassie to the door. “Thanks for coming out to meet me. If you want a free meal or a fly-fishing lesson—”

  “Not necessary. Cases like this are why I went to law school.”

  After Cassie left, he flattened his hand against the door’s knotty pine surface. “This is what I get for helping people out, not charging them for the work I do. I can’t afford her.”

  “But I can.” Keira appeared at his side. She held out a check to him.

  With one glance, he scoffed. “No way. I won’t accept your charity.”

  “Aren’t you stubborn? Willing to give charity, but not accept it in your own time of need. Think of it as an advance. What kind of boss would I be if I didn’t look out for my employee?” She flashed that posed smile of hers.

  “Some employee. I’ve already made you late.” Robbie breathed deep. Maybe he shouldn’t be doing this at all. He could do some odd jobs closer to home. It wouldn’t pay as well, but he’d be nearer his family. “Now I’ll be bringing all this drama with me.”

  “Don’t say another word about it. Besides, you promised Anabelle a sandcastle. Blame it on my daddy issues, but the thought of you breaking that promise to her . . . Well, we can’t have that. Besides, there’s something I need to do at our first stop. It’s been a long time coming and I need you there, okay?” She pressed the check to his palm. “Take the money.”

  “Why are you doing this?”

  Her fingers slid around his hand, holding it firmly in hers. “Just because we stopped dating didn’t mean I stopped caring for you. And just because Anabelle isn’t my daughter doesn’t mean I don’t want what’s best for her. You, Robbie, are what’s best for her. There’s not a doubt in my mind.”

  The door burst open.

  Robbie had to throw up his arm to block it from hitting Keira.

  Ryann peeked in. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner. The last table took forever to finish their food. What did Cassie say?”

  After he recounted the discussion and counterproposal for the parenting plan, Ryann said a few words about Vivian that would’ve made their momma blush.

  Meanwhile, Keira walked the perimeter of the family room and kitchen. She ran her fingers over the mantel, lifted her eyes to the beams on the ceiling, and tapped on the window looking out over the river.

  “What can I do?” Ryann’s face had attained the hue of a fire truck. She was fiercely protective of their family. And she held a particular loathing for Vivian.

  “Just pray. And don’t find her address and go to her house.”

  “No promises,” Ryann said.

  “We should head out. Best not to delay Keira any more than I already have.”

  “Robbie, may I use your bathroom?” Keira peeked into the master bedroom.

  “Sure.” The bathroom had two entries. The first and most convenient for guests was the closed door directly behind her, but he wanted to show off his hard work. “Head into the master, then turn right. You’ll see it.”

  She stepped into his bedroom and paused, looking around.

  Fortunately, he’d made his bed and rid the space of dirty laundry that morning. The furniture and decor were definitely fitting for a bachelor, but a bachelor with a sister who had a good eye for interior design. A moment later, Keira was out of sight.

  Ryann pounced on the opportunity, a sparkle in her eye replacing the anger from moments ago. “You planning to elope during this two-week trip? You know if you get married without me there, I’ll never forgive you.”

  “It’s not like that.”

  “Do you want it to be? I mean, when Drew sent us out earlier, she had her arms around you. Then, after we’d finished praying as a family, you didn’t let go of her hand. We all noticed. And were you guys kissing when I came in?”

  “Someone’s trying to steal my daughter from me. Kissing is the furthest thing from my mind.”

  Hands up, Ryann surrendered. “Looks like it’s going that way, is all.”

  Robbie drummed the table. “I don’t know. Keira’s got me so mixed up.”

  “You still love her?”

  Robbie mashed his lips together.

  Ryann laughed. “Yep, you’re done.”

  “It doesn’t matter how I feel.” He tugged at the front of his shirt. Boy, it was hot. Why hadn’t he installed a ceiling fan? “There’s too much history. Too much brokenness.”

  “You sound like the naysayers when Nehemiah set to rebuild the wall around Jerusalem.”

  “Your point?”

  Ryann’s big green eyes stared him down. “Well, Nehemiah, ask God to strengthen your hands for the task.”

  “You don’t get it. Even if I can rebuild what we had, it’s a matter of time before she leaves me again.” Robbie tried to clear his throat. “I don’t want to lose Keira. I cannot lose Anabelle. What if it’s all in vain?”

  Ryann’s focus dropped to her hands. She thumbed one of the many scars along her wrist. “Even if it is, you won’t regret fighting to save the ones you love. Trust me.”

  Keira glided into the kitchen. “Are we ready to hit the road?”

  Robbie stood and swallowed down the last gulp of water—which almost came back up when Ryann jabbed his kidney.

  “How ’bout you call once or twice this time? I kind of miss you when you’re gone, Slobbie Robbie.”

  “I’ll miss you, too, Cryin’ Ryann.” He wrapped her in a half headlock, half hug until she patted his arm and cried uncle.

  Ryann hugged Keira. Did his sister whisper something to her?

  “I’ll try. Promise,” Keira said.

  “Good.” Ryann let her go and headed to the front door. “I’m going down to the office to say goodbye to Annie. I don’t think Mom’s let her go
since Drew delivered the papers. Remember, we serve a powerful God, and he loves a good underdog story.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  I have a surprise for you.” Keira stood beneath the Jeep’s tailgate, shielded from Idaho’s searing midafternoon sun. She rummaged through one of her suitcases, no doubt looking for her next ensemble. Her fourth one, even though they’d only been out shooting for five hours. She tossed a couple of items off to the side and closed the bag.

  Robbie didn’t know who Tumi was or why his name was on all her luggage, but it looked way fancier than his duffel bag he’d had since ninth grade.

  “Oh yeah? What’s that?” The stone Robbie tossed landed on the chalk square labeled with a three. Like a flamingo, he hiked up one leg in preparation for his turn on the hopscotch grid.

  He landed on square one and two, leaped over three, all the while watching Keira comb her long waves into a high ponytail. The sight of her slender neck sent ripples through him. He remembered the many times he’d kissed that soft skin like it was yesterday. In his excitement, he missed box six, and stumbled on boxes seven and eight.

  “You did it wrong, Daddy.”

  “Guess you gotta show me again.” Robbie scooped the stone off the pavement and placed it in Anabelle’s hand. Back at the Jeep, he leaned against the rear body panel.

  “We’re doing one of your favorite things. Before you ask, yes, you can bring Anabelle.” The familiar oversize T-shirt Keira slipped over her head had the logo of a fly-fishing guide company on the breast pocket. Beneath the cotton, her arms wrestled like two snakes in a sack.

  Robbie looked to where Anabelle was struggling to hurdle square two. Next time, he’d have to draw the grid smaller. When the rustling of clothes ceased, he joined Keira under the tailgate.

  It was magic how girls could change clothes without ever showing their skin. Was that a skill they learned in middle school or something? Did mothers teach their daughters how to do that? Robbie hoped not. Add that to the list of things Anabelle could never learn from him.

  “Isn’t that mine?” he asked.

  “I have no idea what you mean.” That smile of hers, like always, summoned him closer.

  “I must be imagining things because that shirt sure does look familiar.” He pointed to a spot in the center, above the breast bone. “See this barbecue sauce stain?” When she glanced down, he flicked her nose.

  “Oh goodness. Do your dad jokes never end?”

  “Get ready. I hear they’ll get worse as I age.”

  “So when we’re touring some castle in Switzerland in sixty years and Anabelle says, ‘I’m hungry,’ you’ll say?”

  “Probably ‘Where are my teeth?’”

  She laughed. Beneath the dingy shirt, she wore a pair of bike shorts.

  She looked . . . what was that word? Frumpy. That was it. And he loved the look on her.

  Following Keira’s request, Anabelle repacked the chalk in the activity box. Robbie grabbed three waters out of the cooler while Keira straightened up the trunk. There was a rhythm to their movements now. Each person did their own task, but the combined effort led to results.

  “Follow me,” Keira said.

  The parking lot only held about a dozen cars, their license plates ranging from almost as many states. The sign on the building read Gillz Water Sports.

  Awesome.

  After the proper waivers were signed and life jackets were fitted, the three of them joined a group out on the Snake River. Keira, by herself, would’ve made good time to Shoshone Falls. But Robbie and Anabelle, in their tandem kayak, slowed her progress. It was surprisingly hard to paddle with a squirmy four-year-old in front of him. Especially one who kept trying to reach down into the water on one side, nearly capsizing them in the process.

  It also didn’t help that Robbie couldn’t keep his eyes on his own boat. Halfway through the trip, Keira had rolled up the sleeves of the shirt, giving him a clear view of her arms as she worked the oar from one side to the other.

  Wonder of wonders.

  Finally, they reached their destination. A majestic veil of white water poured over rocks. When the sun caught the spray off the falls, a rainbow shimmered in the air before them.

  Anabelle beamed. Perilously, she climbed onto Robbie’s lap for a hug and knocked their oar into the water.

  “Say cheese.” The sun glinted off the phone in Keira’s hand.

  “Cheddar,” Robbie and Anabelle said together.

  Keira snapped the pic, replaced her phone in a waterproof bag, then paddled closer. She lugged the oar out of the water and handed it back to Robbie, but not before she gave him and Annie a little splash.

  “Paddle fast, Knudsen. If I catch you, you’re going over. And I hear there’s a leviathan beneath the surface. He likes to eat girls with blond hair who smell like unflavored oatmeal.”

  “I’ll save you, Keira.” Anabelle scooped water and flung it at Robbie.

  “Hey, I thought you were on my team.”

  “Girls rule, boys drool.” Anabelle grinned and shirked away in case he tried to get her.

  Robbie rolled his eyes. He was gonna kill his sister.

  Keira was already a dozen yards ahead of him.

  He dug his oar deep in the water again and again until his back and biceps burned. He might not catch Keira, but it sure would be fun to try.

  When they finally landed their kayaks back at Gillz, Robbie carried Keira into the water and immersed them both—payment for her smack talk about winning their race. Sure, she beat his chest with one fist, but she also tightened her body to his. Thank you, frigid river water.

  Two hours later, they arrived at their hotel to shower and change for dinner. They stepped foot in a farm-to-table restaurant just as the sun was beginning to set over Twin Falls. Even as Keira took her usual product placement snaps, she seemed out of it. Robbie didn’t understand. The day had been perfectly pleasant. He was starting to get the hang of apertures, angles, and ISO. Anabelle had been on her finest behavior, too.

  “Everything okay? Has someone else made a nasty comment on a picture?” He hadn’t checked, lest he track down the offender and speak his mind.

  “Oh, I didn’t tell you. I thought a lot about what you said on Thursday after your cowboy brawl. I’m not okay with those comments. I went through as many as I could this weekend and blocked all the users who crossed that line of appropriateness.”

  “Really? Good for you.”

  “I’m trying this new thing where I’m not a doormat to anyone. Not even my followers. I gotta stand for something, right? I don’t want the girls who look up to me thinking it’s okay for a man to mistreat her or abuse her.” Her gaze lingered on Anabelle, who had asked for grilled chicken tenders and steamed broccoli, like Keira.

  Anabelle, of course, dunked her chicken in a giant vat of ketchup, while Keira ate hers plain.

  Keira did accept a roll from the bread basket, eyes rolling back in her head with the first bite.

  The mmm sound she made almost made Robbie fall off his chair. When he recovered himself, he spoke again. “You didn’t answer my question. Is everything okay?”

  Her chewing slowed. When she finally swallowed, it looked difficult. After a quick shake of her head, she gave a forced smile. “I’ll tell you later. First, I want to enjoy the rest of this roll.”

  * * *

  * * *

  On Keira’s suggestion, they took a stroll down Main Avenue after dinner. The town of Twin Falls, Idaho, looked to be straight out of a Hallmark movie. The kind of place where couples probably wore coordinated sweaters in autumn and ice-skated in the town square at Christmastime. On this summer night, the scene was just as quaint. Pairs of folk walked along the streets under the lamplight, holding hands. Children pranced around them, playing hide-and-seek behind trees and benches and sometimes stopping to wave to Anabelle. Ye
t with every step, Keira’s stomach dropped more and more.

  “This is a cool town. If I didn’t love West Yellowstone so much, I could see moving here.” Robbie’s arm swung close to hers.

  Any other day, Keira might be consumed with whether he might graze her hand with his. Instead, it was a mere passing thought. “Robbie.”

  He paused in front of her when he saw she’d stopped.

  “Your question at dinner? About if everything is okay? I don’t know. But I think I’m about to find out.” She motioned to her right. “In there.”

  Together, they stared at the storefront, which seemed to be ripped from the late 1800s. The redbrick face surrounded the yellow light from inside. The front window read Sanders General Store in vintage font, also harkening back to the days of the Old West.

  Keira’s nerves felt as though a preschooler had climbed inside her and was playing hopscotch.

  Robbie said something, but she couldn’t hear it over the pounding of the heartbeat in her ears.

  “There was a reason we came to this town. It wasn’t for the waterfalls.” Keira nodded to the store. “I’ve been doing some research about my family history. I was going to tell you, but then everything happened with Vivian.” Keira nodded to the store. “Of course, now that I’m here, I don’t know if I can go in.”

  His hand wrapped hers, bringing welcomed comfort. “What can I do for you?”

  She narrowed the space between them. “Just stay by my side.”

  “You got it.”

  Several seconds passed. Finally, she took a deep breath and led the way into the store. A million different items blurred together. Only one thing took center focus. A gray-haired woman with a welcoming smile.

  She stood behind the cash register. “Can I help you?”

  Keira couldn’t speak.

  After a couple moments, Robbie answered, “I think we’re just looking.”

  “If you need anything, my name is Emmaline.”

  “Thank you . . . Emmaline.” Robbie pivoted toward Keira and studied her face. “I think I get it now.”