A Bride For Windridge Hall

by Jeanie P Johnson

  “Do you believe that I would marry you, and have your child, only to discover it was a loveless marriage, and be bound to you by our child? We would all be miserable. If we divorced, I would be forced to relinquish my child to your care. That is something I will not risk.

  “If after marrying you, I cannot persuade you to love me, there would be no reason to continue the agreement. You have five months. If we are married, and your feelings for me do not strengthen in that time, and we have not consummated the marriage, we can get an annulment as you suggested in the first place. You can then snap up anyone who needs a rich husband since you are willing to have a loveless marriage anyway and meet the requirements of the will. Who knows, perhaps she will allow you to keep your mistress since love will not have anything to do with it. On the other hand, if you need more time to learn to love me, I will remain your wife, in name only, until you can profess your love for me. ”

  Willard started laughing, Alfred looked bewildered, and Lilith came up to Emily’s side.

  “Think of what you are doing, Emily,” Lilith whispered in her ear. “Are you sure you want to marry a man you are hopelessly in love with, and then have to hold him at arm’s length? He may never be able to return your love. Think of the pain it would cause if you end up crawling away defeated in the end.”

  “I think Roderick is capable of love. He is certainly capable of kindness. But only time will tell. Besides, he has promised to support me if it doesn’t work out, so what do I have to lose?”

  “This is ridiculous,” Roderick frowned. “You are all trying to structure my life and my emotions like I am some sort of experiment you wish to take part in. This is my life, and my choices, not your’s to manipulate. I am tired of people trying to influence my options! My father started it, and now my future wife wants to continue it!”

  Emily looked at Roderick with sad eyes. “Then perhaps there will be no future wife, Roderick. I am willing to risk the next few months of my life, to discover if you can learn to love me in the way a wife should be loved and cherished. There is the possibility that it may not work, and I will lose the man I know I love. You should be willing to risk something in return!”

  “You only think you love me because your head is full of romantic ideas. Consider of all the marriages that were arranged for people over the years not based on love. They survived didn’t they?”

  “Oh, perhaps with a few mistresses on the side? You speak of manipulation. Aren’t you trying to manipulate me as well? Think of your own arranged marriage, Roderick. How did that turn out? Would you have been happy if you could not make Abigail love you in return, had the duel never transpired? Do you want that kind of marriage between us, now that the shoe is on the other foot?

  Roderick’s eyes seethed at Emily. He had trusted her with his deepest feelings, which should have proven something to her, but now she was using it against him!

  “This conversation is over with,” Roderick announced. “I am going to go out tomorrow and get a special licenses to marry you, and if you refuse, we can discuss the compromises you have made, while under my roof!”

  He and Emily glared at each other, and then he turned and left the room.

  Lilith rushed to Emily’s side.

  “The brute!” she gasped.

  Alfred stepped forward.

  “Is it true he has compromised you, Emily? I shall call him out if he has!”

  “And end up dead, like James?” Emily shivered. “Don’t allow yourself to be killed over my honor, Alfred!”

  “The man is crazy!” Willard announced. “Crazy in love, that is. It may end up being a battle, Emily, but if you are willing to fight for Roderick to get him to admit his love for you, then you will have your hands full. It is up to you. If he tries to force your hand, and you truly do not want to marry him, I will take you under my protection. Compromised or not, none of us will allow Roderick to force you into anything if you wish it otherwise.”

  “Even if you are compromised, I would gladly marry you!” Alfred stepped forward. “You would know that I loved you, Emily! Tell Roderick that, if he tries to force your hand.”

  “You are all too sweet. I could not have a better group of friends,” Emily said tearfully, only I cannot allow you to take my burden upon your shoulders. If Roderick forces my hand, it will be of my own doing anyway!”

  “So what do you plan to do?” Willard asked.

  “I…I…just don’t know!” Emily sniffed. “I am too tired to think right now. The best action for me to take at the moment is to retire to my room. In the morning I will feel more able to make a decision.”

  With that, Emily left the room, and her friends watched as she departed, each thinking their own thoughts about what had just transpired.

  As soon as she left, Willard strode from the room in search of Roderick. It was time he undid the damage he had caused Roderick, and perhaps Roderick would stop suspecting him of trying to keep him and Emily apart. All he wanted for both of them was happiness. He saw a light under the study door, and knocked lightly, then entered.

  Roderick was sitting at his desk with a drink in his hand.

  “Have you come to celebrate my upcoming marriage with me, Willard?” Roderick asked, lifting his glass. “Come have a drink with me. I see you plan on disturbing my tranquility as it is, so come right in!”

  Willard walked over and poured himself a drink as well and sat across the desk from his cousin.

  “It is time we have a serious talk, Roderick. We have been enemies for too long, and I am tired of the game. It is time to wipe the slate clean. I truthfully regret my part in your last marriage. We were both just boys at the time, and your father had us by the scruff of the neck, so to speak. He had the power to make or break our lives, and he pitted us against each other, to have his way. I am sure he wanted you to inherit the estate, instead of me, but he had to use me as a leverage for you to take on the responsibility.

  “You allowed Emily’s snub to alter your whole attitude where women were concerned. Then, you refusing to marry frightened your father, believing that the Estate and title would have no direct heirs. You loved Emily then and proceeded to turn from every other woman in your life because she chose to snub you. I am sure you wished to profess a love for her back then, and I am certain you love her now.

  “You are merely trying to punish her for what she did to your tender ego. Admit it, Roderick, she is what turned the tide on you, and you have blamed her all these years. You vowed to make her regret that snub, but you love her too much to intentionally hurt her. The sad part of it is, you are hurting her Roderick, whether you know it or not.

  “Subconsciously, you are rejecting her, in the same way she rejected you all those years ago. She just wants you to admit your love, and since you already love her, why not give her that satisfaction?”

  “Oh yes, solve all the problems of my life by spreading a little love on the wound. Loving anyone, is too dangerous, Willard. Haven’t you discovered that yet? I was so eager to love Emily on her sixteenth birthday and was brought up short. Now I have lost that eagerness, and perhaps it is her fault that I feel that way. Even now, she uses what I have confided in her against me. I don’t know if I can trust her with my heart. Love is a mere word, that I doubt anyone actually knows the meaning of anyway.”

  “You are just afraid of getting hurt yourself! You don’t care about Emily’s feelings, just so long as your heart does not suffer any!”

  “Damnation! Why don’t you just go away and leave me to my misery? This is all my father’s doing anyway. It is his fault if Emily gets hurt by me. He is the one insisting I get married and produce an heir. Don’t you think that thought has plagued me this entire time? Don’t you think I would rather court Emily and learn to give my heart before I married her? That option has been taken from me by my father. So there is only one option left to me, which I am taking now.”

  “I came here to apologize because I wanted to assure you, that I do not want to stand
in the way of you and Emily. At the same time, I want to assure her happiness. I also want that same happiness for you, dear cousin. You are going to make a mess of this, as surely as you made a mess of your last marriage!”

  Roderick’s eyes darkened.

  “I take some of that blame,” Willard added hastily. “Had I known you were trying to make the marriage work, I would never have helped Abigail. I learned too late, and the deed was already done. James certainly did not deserve her, and you could have made her happy if she had let you try. Now you have a second chance to prove yourself with Emily, so don’t let the past influence your judgment.”

  “It is my judgment, Willard. I am the one who has to give my heart, not you. I am the one who will probably end up doing something stupid to make Emily turn from me, and if my heart is not entangled, I will survive. I fear I won’t, otherwise. I have to have a wife and an heir. Who better to fill that position than a woman I may someday allow myself to love openly. I love everything about her, Willard, but that is as far as I can allow my heart to go. She will accept that in time, and I will have that heir, mark my word.”

  “I can only wish you the best of luck, cousin. However, I pity you both, if this does not turn out well in the end.”

  “Blast, Willard! I have no other choice. I want Emily as my wife, and by God, I shall have her!” Roderick roared.

  “I see your mind is made up. I believe Emily is as stubborn as you appear to be! There may be a war of the wills over that coveted heir. I pray you do not do something you will regret in the end, which will turn Emily’s love from you.”

  Willard emptied his glass, placed it on the desk, and shook his head at his cousin.

  “It is your life, Roderick, and you are going to have to pay the consequences for any choice you make. Let’s just hope you are making the right one.”

  He then turned and left the room. Roderick would have to fight his own battles, the same as Emily, he decided.

  Willard returned to the drawing room, to find Lilith and Alfred deep in conversation.

  “And what sort of plans are you two making,?” he questioned them.

  They turned and straightened their expressions.

  “Now, now, no secrets here. We are all in this up to our necks, so tell me what is on your minds.”

  “What if Emily got kidnapped?” Alfred asked with a slight smile. “If Roderick believed her life was in danger, he would have to admit he loved her.”

  “Any man worth his salt would save a lady from a kidnapper, whether he loved her or not,” Willard pointed out. “You will have to come up with something better than that.”

  “What if she just disappeared, then?” Lilith suggested. We could kidnap her, and if Roderick thought she was running away from him, he would have to admit he loved her, to get her back.”

  “You might cause Emily to hate you both if you took the choice out of her hands,” Willard reasoned.

  “What if she doesn’t know it is us? We could get someone else to take her away,” Alfred suggested.

  “That is kidnapping, my friend,” Willard laughed. “We could be getting someone into deep trouble if we had them do that. If Emily did not leave a message for Roderick saying she was leaving, he would believe she was kidnapped, or perhaps something worse, and go searching for her. All hell would break lose once he found her and discovered you had a hand in it. Besides, that would take time. Time is what we don’t have. Maybe we should just let Emily and Roderick muddle this out on their own. We can’t save the world, after all.”

  “It is a pity,” Lilith said trying to resign herself to the thought.

  Willard put his arm around her shoulder.

  “Look at it this way. If we allow Roderick and Emily to work this out on their own, you and I would have a lot more time to get to know each other. I suggest that tomorrow, we depart, and stop giving them both excuses to hold each other off. With no one to use as a shield, and a protection of her honor, either Emily will leave on her own account, or they will get married since I don’t think Roderick can keep his hands off of her. Then they can battle it out on their own.”

  “I hate to leave Emily in a position to be compromised,” Alfred frowned.

  Willard laughed.

  “My dear man, considering what Roderick said, she has already been compromised. So what else could happen?”

  “I think she has willing let herself be compromised,” Lilith added. “I saw the dreamy expression on her face when she told me about Roderick kissing her.”

  “Then I suggest we all bow out and let the challenge begin. I am sure they will inform us as to whether they decide to get married or not.”

  Lilith smiled up at Willard and he planted a chaste kiss upon her lips.

  “Why don’t we do some packing and I can invite you over to my humble accommodations. Alfred can be your chaperone, so everything will be on the up and up.”

  “I think I would like that,” Lilith agreed, and Alfred shrugged.

  It seemed like love was in the air. What could he do but go along with the plans?

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  When Emily came down to the breakfast room the next morning, Willard, Alfred and Lilith were already there. They were just finishing their meal.

  “Sorry to leave you in the lurch like this,” Willard smiled, as he kissed Emily on the cheek, “but the three of us have decided to depart. Our bags are packed and we have just been waiting for you, so we could bid you goodbye.”

  “You are leaving so soon?”

  “Admit it, Emily,” Lilith said, “you and Roderick have to work this all out on your own. We will just get in the way. We were making all sorts of plans to try to get Roderick to admit he loves you. Even kidnapping you if necessary. So believe me, you do not need us here to meddle any longer.”

  “You were going to kidnap me?”

  “I made them think better of it,” Willard informed her. “You are just going to have to muddle through on your own, I’m afraid.”

  “But what if Roderick tries to compromise me to force my hand?”

  “Absurd!” Alfred piped. “According to him, he has already done that! Unless you want me to protect your honor at this late date, there is no use me being here any longer. Seems to me you should just give up on trying to make Roderick admit his love for you, and marry him out of your own love for him. He may never accept that he loves you. However, since I believe he does, why don’t you just leave it at that?”

  Emily put her hand to her cheek, feeling a blush rise. She wondered what her friends must think of her if they believed she had been compromised? They too determined it was necessary for her to save her own honor by marrying Roderick.

  “If you have not been able to hold him at arms length so far,” Lilith asked, “what makes you think you can hold him off after you marry him?”

  “Oh!” Emily stamped her foot. “This is all impossible! You are leaving and I am going to have to…”

  “Just marry the man, Emily! Like I said, I know he loves you, even if he never admits it! You should both stop being so stubborn and allow nature to take its course!” Willard suggested.

  Emily lowered her eyes. Maybe she should stop trying to fight it, she thought. Only the thought of Roderick merely wanting her to marry him so she could bring forth an heir, galled her. What would happen once the child was born? The worry that Roderick would get his revenge in the end still hovered on the fringes of her mind. This was infuriating!

  “We are going over to stay with Willard, so if you need us for any reason, don’t hesitate to call on us,” Lilith informed Emily.

  Then they all departed, leaving Emily alone in the breakfast room. Where was Roderick, she wondered? Emily had lost her appetite, and decided that she would look for Roderick, if he hadn’t already taken off to get that special license to marry her. She went to his room, but the bed had not been slept in and that alarmed her. She went to Della’s room, to make sure that was not where he was sleeping, but her room was empty, so i
f he had gone to Della, they were no longer together in her room. Emily frowned. She realized she did not trust Roderick. How could she marry someone she couldn’t trust?

  Emily was passing the study, and she noticed the door was ajar, and then she heard a sound inside, so she pushed the door open, to discover Roderick, sprawled at his desk. His head was resting on his arm and an empty brandy bottle sat lying on its side next to his elbow. His hand still clutched an empty glass. She heard a low groan come from his throat. Then he slowly raised his head to look at her through narrow eyes, as though he were trying to focus on her, but was having a hard time doing it.

  “What do you want?” he asked, a slight slur to his voice.

  “You’re drunk!” Emily exclaimed.

  “So? Why not? I can drink if I wish to. Come join me in a drink.”

  He picked up the empty bottle, and held it up to his eyes.

  “Oops, guess I drank it all. Where’s Willard? He had a drink with me earlier. We were discussing you.”

  “That was last evening, Roderick. You must have passed out. Willard left after breakfast, and so did Lilith and Alfred,” she informed him. “It appears that you have not even slept in your bed the night,” she observed.

  “Oh? Do you want to join me in my bed?” he asked with a crooked grin running across his face.

  He started to push himself up from the chair, but changed his mind when he discovered his legs felt too wobbly to support him.

  “Why don’t you come help me up,” he suggested.

  “Yes, you are so snookered, that you need to go to bed,” Emily stated. She went to his side and started to pull him up, but instead he managed to pull her down into his lap.

  “That’s better. Why don’t you just stay here for a moment, while I get my strength.”

  She could smell the liquor on his breath and she waved her hand in front of his mouth.

  “You could start a fire with that breath of yours,” she told him honestly.