Change My Mind

by Ali Parker

  “Dance with me,” he said, taking Cori’s hand and kissing the back of it.

  “Absolutely,” she answered, her entire face lighting up. “Have a cookie,” she shouted over her shoulder as he led her out to the dance floor.

  “Have a cookie?” I muttered. Was that a euphemism for something?

  I made my way around the room, looking for a familiar face. All I saw was Cori and Nick and a few staff I recognized. This was not the usual New Year’s party for adults. I helped myself to a glass of punch and turned around to watch them dancing to a new song that was familiar, but I couldn’t place it. It was a Twilight Zone moment. I decided to just go with it.

  “Did you hear about Coach Fleener and Miss Harding?” I heard Chase ask from behind me.

  I grinned, turning around to look at him. I paused when I laid eyes on him. He was gorgeous. He looked just like he did that night, although more handsome. He was wearing a silver bowtie that matched my dress, just like that night.

  “What would that be?” I asked, still smiling.

  “I heard they were caught making out in the back room of the gym,” he said as he walked around the table.

  Again, it was another highlight from our prom. “You boys are crazy. Miss Harding wouldn’t be caught dead with Coach Fleener.”

  He grinned, his eyes warm and full of excitement as he looked down at me. “Hi.”

  “Hi.”

  “You look nice. Very nice.”

  “You look very handsome.”

  He winked, flicking the lapel of the black tux. “This old thing?”

  “Chase, what is all this?”

  He took the glass of punch from my hand and put it on the table. “Dance with me. I happen to know a good song is coming on.”

  “You just happen to know that, huh?”

  He grinned again. “I might have given the DJ a couple of bucks.”

  He took my hand and led me onto the dance floor. I knew this would happen. Chase was a charming man and the likelihood of me seeing him tonight was very high. I came anyway. I told myself I was strong enough to resist his charms. I might have been a little mistaken.

  He put his arms around me, resting them on my hips as we began to move to a new song that was indeed very slow. I knew the song very well. It was one of my favorite songs back in high school. It was a song that reminded me of him.

  “Why do I feel like I’m back at prom?” I asked.

  “You look amazing,” he answered instead. “I love the dress.”

  “I have a feeling you had a little something to do with this dress.”

  “I plead the Fifth.”

  Instead of questioning him further, I relaxed my head against his shoulder and let him slowly turn me around on the dance floor. We swayed back and forth under the hundreds of shimmering stars hanging over our heads. Over his shoulder, I could see Cori and Nick locked in an embrace. The crooning sound of Taylor Swift singing about love seemed so youthful now that I’d been in the real world for a decade.

  “This is wild,” I whispered.

  “I hope you are having fun,” he answered.

  “The night is young.”

  The music switched up and Beyoncé came on to the sound of cheers from everyone on the dance floor.

  Chase stepped back, a mischievous smile on his face. “I know you know this one.”

  “Oh goodness, boy, do I.”

  “You ready to get your groove on?”

  “I’ll probably break a hip,” I said with a laugh.

  “Not a chance. I happen to know those hips are in very good shape.”

  Before I could scurry off the dance floor, he started to move, pulling out the dance moves from ten years past. The rest of the people on the floor were following his lead. I had to go along. I danced like I had not danced since that night. I felt carefree and young, surrounded by teens who were having the times of their lives.

  I laughed more than I could remember laughing in a long time. Parker came onto the dance floor wearing a pretty blue gown that was just a little on the naughty side with a peekaboo cutout over her cleavage.

  “You know, that would have gotten you thrown out of our prom,” I teased.

  She winked. “I was that girl. I was the one pushing the boundaries.”

  “I see that.”

  A Pitbull song came on, sparking a new round of raucous laughter and more dancing. By the time the song was over, I was dying of thirst. Parker, Cori, and I drifted away from the boys to get some punch.

  “I happen to know where the good stuff is,” Cori said. “Let’s go.”

  Parker and I followed her out a side door and over to the bar that was packed with a lot of single guys and a few couples. We each got a cocktail, hovering in one corner of the lounge while we drank.

  “This is a wild night,” I commented.

  “You ladies look amazing,” Parker said.

  “Anyone want to tell me why we’re partying with teenagers?” I asked.

  They both smiled. “You should talk to Chase,” Parker said.

  “I did. Kind of.”

  We could hear the faint hum of music bleeding down the hall. It wasn’t overly loud or obnoxious and I doubted any of the guests could hear it unless they were close.

  Cori grabbed my arm. “It’s On the Floor,” she squealed. “We have to get back there.”

  I groaned, remembering how much she loved the song. “I hope you’re ready for this,” I warned Parker.

  Parker grinned, putting her drink on the bar. “I’m so ready.”

  We dashed back to the prom and got wild on the dance floor, showing the kids just what we could do. Chase and the guys joined us, pushing up on us while we did our best J. Lo impressions, popping hips and booties and having the time of our lives. I realized then, dancing at prom was different than dancing in the clubs. Clubs were all about hooking up and finding someone to go home with. Prom was about hanging with your friends and your prom date. There was no hooking up.

  When the song ended and transitioned into another slow song, I found myself back in Chase’s arms. I let myself look at him, really look at him as we gently swayed back and forth. His hair was slicked back, just like it was that night. He was definitely broader and manlier, with the faint hint of facial hair cropping up on his jaw.

  Being in his arms like this once again felt right. It felt safe. Back then, when he held me close like this, I used to think nothing could ever come between us. I almost missed being that naïve. Ignorance was bliss. I was glad I didn’t know my entire world was going to be turned upside down a few hours later. I was glad I had the good memories.

  I almost dreaded what tomorrow held in store. They said history repeated itself. I didn’t want to repeat our history.

  I wanted to live right there in that moment.

  Chapter 72

  Chase

  After taking a punch break, I was ready to pull her back into my arms. I knew it would be good to hold her again. I just had no idea how good it would be.

  I missed her. The last week had been hell without her. I stayed busy planning the prom redo, but every night, I went to bed longing to have her beside me. I couldn’t explain when it happened, but sometime in the last six weeks, I fell hard. Harder than I would have thought humanly possible. She was all I could think about. I wanted a future with her. I always wanted her, but this was different. This was like I couldn’t breathe right when she wasn’t around.

  “I’m glad you came,” I said close to her ear as we swayed to another slow song. That wasn’t by chance. The DJ was given explicit instructions to keep things slow. I wanted plenty of opportunity to dance with her like this.

  “Me too,” she answered. “This is weird but fun.”

  I smiled, tucking her head against my shoulder once again. We were the same people yet I felt different. The scene was the same, and the music was the same, but we were just a little different. The love I felt for her was magnified a hundred times compared to the love I felt for her back
in high school. People called it puppy love and now I understood what they meant.

  I loved her then but it was more of an infatuation. I always wanted to be near her, and I wanted to spend my time with her, but now, I couldn’t imagine going through life without her.

  Being her boyfriend in high school meant hanging out together and having fun doing stuff. The relationship I want and needed from her now was more of a partnership. I didn’t want to hang out with her. I wanted her to be my other half. I wanted us to do this life together, not just when we had time.

  I knew she was the only woman for me. I had known it then, but I didn’t understand what that really meant. I did now. I had tried to do this life without her and it didn’t work.

  I always had one foot in the past with her. I did want to move into the future like Cori said, but I didn’t want to do it without her. I didn’t think I could do it without her. She was my other half. Our souls were tied together when we were sixteen years old and that was never going to change.

  “Why prom?” she asked.

  This was the moment to come clean. My initial thought was to pull her off the dance floor and take her somewhere quiet and private where we could talk. Then I changed my mind. I didn’t want her to walk away before I could get it all out. Holding her in my arms on the dance floor was the perfect excuse to anchor her to me.

  I had a speech prepared despite telling myself to just go off the cuff. It was now or never. “I wanted to rewrite history,” I said.

  “What does that mean?”

  “Prom night is the moment my life veered off course. I made a decision that night not to tell you my plans because I didn’t want to ruin what I knew was going to be our last night together for a while. I made a decision without consulting you and it cost me more than I’m willing to pay. I want to right my wrong.”

  “I don’t understand. How can you rewrite history?”

  “Not me, us. Together.”

  “I think you need to explain yourself.”

  “Ten years ago, I made a decision that affected both of us. I realize now I didn’t have the right to make that decision alone. I promise I didn’t decide to cancel all our plans because I was trying to hurt you. I didn’t think leaving you behind would completely alter the course of my life. Your life as well.”

  She put her hand on my shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. “Chase, you did the right thing. You made the right choice for you. I see that now.”

  “It wasn’t right.”

  “It was,” she said with a smile. “I couldn’t see it at the time because I was blinded by hurt and anger. I felt abandoned. You were setting off on a new life and I felt like I was left behind.”

  “I know and I’m sorry about that. I should have talked to you about what I wanted to do. I don’t know if I would have changed my mind, but you should have gotten a say. I wish I had taken the time to get your opinion. I wish I could do things differently, which is why I did this. I want to go back to that moment and do things the right way.”

  “We can’t go back. What’s done is done.”

  It wasn’t what I wanted to hear. “I know but I want the chance to apologize and maybe makeup for that mistake.”

  “How long did you know before that night?” she asked in a soft voice.

  It was the part of the truth I really hated. “I made the decision about a week before prom. I had been thinking about it for weeks, but I didn’t actually tell my dad what I wanted to do until then. He tried to talk me out of it, but I insisted.”

  “Weeks, Chase? Why didn’t you tell me? We talked about going to college. We made plans.”

  “I didn’t want to disappoint you. The truth is, I was being selfish. I had a feeling you weren’t going to like it, and instead of manning up and being honest with you, I kept it a secret because I didn’t want to spoil our last few weeks together. I made a decision and didn’t consult you. It has taken me ten years to realize my mistake. That’s not the only mistake I made.”

  She stiffened in my arms. “Please don’t tell me you cheated on me back then.”

  “Definitely not. I would never do that. I’m talking about the magazine article. I made a choice that affected you and never bothered to consult you. I know it doesn’t mean much, but I swear it wasn’t meant to hurt you. I just couldn’t see the wrongness of my decision until after you left. I was an idiot.”

  “Why would you spin such a tall tale?”

  “Because it was what I wanted to happen. I was hoping by the time the article was published, me and you would be back together. You would see the article and think it was sweet that I was so optimistic. I guess I got ahead of myself a little on that one.”

  “Yes, you did.”

  “I’m sorry. I’ve asked her not to print the article. That was not my call to make. I shouldn’t have exposed your personal life without consulting you.”

  “I don’t know if you understand, but that article makes it sound like you hired me because of our past. It discredits all the work I’ve done.”

  Hearing her say it stung. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think. That’s why we are doing this night over. You’re in charge. You get to make the decisions.”

  “I appreciate your attempt to turn back time, but you know we can’t really do that. We’re here now. We are who we are.”

  “Yes, but I want to be here with you. I want you to be the one who decides what comes next. I’ll tell you what I want, but I’ll let you make that decision.”

  “What do you want?” she asked softly.

  “You. Always you. There will never be another woman who makes me feel the way you do. I will never feel the way I feel for you with anyone else. These last ten years, I have always thought about you. Yes, I’ve dated but none of them were you. I’ve never stopped loving you. When I ran into you at the store that day, it was like being hit by lightning. I knew I had to get you back. I probably manipulated you a bit, and for that, I apologize. Again, I was making decisions for you based on what I thought was the best thing for both of us.”

  She smiled, slowly shaking her head. “I had a feeling you were up to something when Cori came to see me.”

  I grinned, shrugging a shoulder. “I’m a bad man. When it comes to you, I act without thinking. I follow my heart and forget to use my brain.”

  “I don’t know. Looking around this place, it seems like there was some brain power involved.”

  “Tell me what I can do. Tell me how to make this right. I can’t change the past, but I can change the future. I need you, Harper. I want you back. I know I made mistakes. Tell me what to do. You have the power.”

  “That’s very empowering, and I appreciate it, but I don’t want power.”

  “What do you want?”

  “A relationship isn’t about one person holding all the power,” she answered. “It’s supposed to be a mutual partnership. Decisions are made after discussion and maybe some compromise. Decisions are not made by one person in the partnership. There are no executive decisions.”

  I nodded, completely understanding. “I get it. I mean, I didn’t, but I do now.”

  Before we could finish our conversation, the song ended, and we were bombarded by heavy bass and an electronic sound that made my ears bleed. I was going to have a talk with the DJ. That was not on my playlist.

  I heard Cori scream with delight and knew exactly who was to blame for interrupting my moment with Harper. With my arm still around her waist, I led her away from the dance floor that erupted into bouncing humans with their arms in the air. I was not about to lose the progress we made in the last ten minutes.

  “Can we go somewhere quiet?” I asked, practically shouting in her ear to be heard.

  She nodded. “Please.”

  “My suite?” I offered, knowing it was a risk. I didn’t want her to think I was pushing too hard, too fast. It was the only place I could think of where we could have some privacy.

  She nodded, sending relief flooding through me. I knew I wasn’t i
n the clear yet and there was still a chance she could tell me she didn’t want to see me again, but I was going to hope for the best. I led her out of the prom and down the hall toward the elevators.

  “Cori always did love that techno stuff,” Harper said with a laugh.

  I groaned, nodding. “Yes, I remember hearing it pounding through the walls of the house. I do not miss that phase.”

  She smiled and leaned against the wall of the elevator. She looked so pretty. It was taking every ounce of self-control I had to keep myself from kissing her. I was dying to be close to her. I was able to control my libido by remembering the fact that every move I made, every word I said, would impact the outcome of this night. I did not want to do anything she wasn’t ready for. I wanted to have a clear agreement in place. If she agreed to give me a second chance, I was going to let her set the pace.

  We stepped off the elevator and headed for my suite. I stopped before I opened the door. “Just so you know, there is a bottle of champagne in here. I wasn’t sure if I would be toasting the New Year alone, but in case I wasn’t, I had it sent up. Do not think I was being presumptive. I was just covering all my bases.”

  She smiled, putting a hand on my cheek. “Okay.”

  It wasn’t exactly a positive answer, but it wasn’t negative either. I would take it.

  Chapter 73

  Harper

  We walked into his suite, and sure enough, there was a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice. It was New Year’s and champagne in his room wasn’t that remarkable. I knew Chase well enough to know that when he said he was covering his bases, that was exactly what he was doing. He was a planner. He would have played out every possible outcome to the night and prepared for all of them.

  “Can I pour you a glass?” he asked.

  “Please,” I said and moved to look out the big picture window that overlooked the city.

  I felt like I was floating. He was saying all the right things. His apology seemed very sincere and I did believe he recognized his mistake. However, I was still leery. Committing the crime and asking for forgiveness after the fact was kind of his thing. I didn’t like it. That was a big deal for me.