The Winter Before

by Karen Crompton

  “More important things?”

  Isaac nodded with a grin, and then dragged a T-shirt over his head. He pulled on his sweatpants, and a fitted blue jacket that zipped up at the front. “You could say that.” He came and sat on the edge of the bed to put on his socks and running shoes.

  “So there are some things you’ll give up running for?”

  Isaac leaned back and kissed Olivia’s forehead, a sweet kiss that lingered on her skin and warmed her entire body. “Well, yeah. I mean it was a big deal for me. It was a first. I’ve never done that before.”

  Olivia nodded, blushing.

  “It’s not every day a guy gets to throw his first punch. I’ve never hit anyone before in my life. I landed it perfectly too. I finally flattened Kyle Mason like I’ve been dreaming about doing since I was six years old.”

  Olivia poked Isaac hard in the side. “You better be joking right now, or that other first that you’ve conveniently forgotten about, might actually be your last!”

  Isaac laughed and the sound belled around the room. “I won’t be long. Stay here. Eat breakfast. Make coffee.”

  “Okay.”

  “Promise you’ll still be here when I get back?”

  “I promise.” Olivia sat up on her elbows. “Actually, you never told me what you wanted to tell me at the festival. I just remembered.”

  “Huh?”

  Olivia smiled at the way Isaac’s eyes dropped to the soft dip between her breasts, something flaming inside them, an emotion she hadn’t seen before. She felt love in his smile, and she felt love in his eyes and she could have stayed in their little bubble forever.

  “The other night. In the parking lot.” Olivia shivered at the terrible memory of their horrible fight. “You said you came to the festival because you missed me, and because you had something important to tell me?”

  Isaac looked confused, and then his frown faded and his eyes widened with recognition. “Oh, yeah. Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

  He walked out of the bedroom and down the hallway toward the kitchen, and before long he returned with the items from the box in his hands. He plopped down on the end of the bed with a gentle bounce.

  He put the brochure of the Forrester Motel and the map of Louisiana on the bedside table and then tucked the page from the Bible into the pocket of Olivia’s jeans that were still strewn across the end of the bed, for safekeeping.

  “I’ll tell you what I found out about Louisiana when I get back. I can’t read the page from the Bible, damn writing’s too small. You’ll have to read it for me. But I found out something pretty interesting. You’ll want to hear this.”

  “Why don’t you just tell me now?”

  Isaac tried to smile, but it felt forced. What he wanted to do was something else entirely. And Isaac wasn’t a man used to taking what he wanted. But he felt different. Everything suddenly felt different.

  “We’ll have time to talk later.”

  And then his mouth was on Olivia’s mouth, and his body was pressing down on hers, and Olivia immediately forgot what she was asking him about and the fact that she was still completely naked beneath the covers was all she had on her mind.

  An hour later Isaac went for his run, and Olivia drifted off to sleep with the sound of full clouds overhead and a heart that was just full.

  Isaac’s running shoes sounded a dull thud on the road. He’d been running for a while now, and his back was damp despite the snow beneath his feet and the rumbling storm that was building with every new mile he covered.

  He knew he probably shouldn’t be out in such bad weather, but old habits were hard to break, and as it was, he had some serious thinking to do.

  And just like the habits, old fears rose in his chest and anxiety zinged through his arms, making him feel heavy and light at the same time.

  He’d been scared of losing Olivia before.

  But now that he’d had her, in the most intimate way possible, fallen and tumbled and crashed head first in love with her, the thought of never having her again was truly terrifying.

  The tar beneath his feet moved quickly with every long stride, and Isaac increased his pace deliberately so that his lungs didn’t get a chance to feel anything other than the desperate need for oxygen. His breath was white when he exhaled. The fields were silver with ice, the mountains beyond looming shadows with peaks and valleys that crowded the town and left Isaac feeling insignificant in comparison.

  His feet moved beneath him, a natural cadence that he’d developed over the years and it felt good to run with no clear destination in mind. He just followed his eyes and aimed his feet at the crossroads that steeply swooped toward the lake on the far side of town.

  He braced himself against the way the road dipped and made sure to avoid the puddles and piles of firmly packed snow in the gutters.

  The sun was hidden behind long streaks of low-lying cloud and with the way the wind ripped through the streets, pushing the clouds one way and then the other, it looked almost magical as Isaac briefly took in the scenery.

  He wasn’t heading in any particular direction, yet all the while he knew exactly where he was going. His lungs felt like they might burst, but Isaac was no longer lost. He’d finally found the way, and he knew where the road ahead was leading him.

  He smiled as he ran, rounding the last corner out of town, headed back toward Briar’s Creek and he might have once cared how he looked—the cold air making his teeth ache and his lips sting—but the thought of climbing back into bed beside Olivia overruled all else, and he suddenly didn’t care how he looked, or what anyone else thought of him.

  He felt insane. He felt like a crazy person living a life that couldn’t possibly be real. He was so happy in that moment that he could have died right then and there, a happy man, knowing that even if it was only for a short while he was blessed with calling Miss Olivia Parker his.

  Isaac turned and ran toward home. He ran, and he ran. He ran until his shoes were wet and his toes stung. He was desperate to be back again before the storm hit, but more desperate to be back with Olivia.

  The wind tangled through his long hair and he lifted his face toward the sky as he crossed the bridge, the water beneath him sluggish with ice and fallen branches, the green/blue of mountain water sliding along the sloping banks with a rush of sounds that practically drowned out everything else.

  Isaac’s scars were warm despite the cold and it was the strangest sensation. He’d never before felt more alive, and he decided to make a detour through the corrals of the Jonah Stud to the left, cutting at least a mile off his run.

  And as he skirted the corrals and chutes that housed the horses, rounded the enormous bales of bound hay that were stacked high behind the barns—the occasional animal whinnying in the stalls just to let him know they sensed his presence and knew he was there—Isaac suddenly felt the most overpowering sense to do something he’d never done before.

  He felt like praying.

  And that was most definitely something he’d never done before.

  He stopped cold, his legs burning.

  His breath flew from his lungs as he buckled over at the waist. Hands low on his hips, he let his head fall forward as he exhaled, sweat dripping, and he stood as still as the cold stone of the mountains in front of him.

  “Dear Lord,” he said, breathing so hard he nearly toppled forward. “Shit, is that what I’m even supposed to say,” he whispered into the thin air as he stared down at the sodden ground.

  A crack of thunder sounded loudly and Isaac flinched. Probably shouldn’t have said shit.

  “Yeah, so… uh, I know I don’t check in too often, but I… I need your advice.”

  Isaac pushed his hands back through his damp hair, feeling the first fat drops of rain hit his face.

  “Looks like you’ve got a bit on this morning, so I’ll make this quick. I need guidance. I need to know how to make her happy, and I need to know how to keep her happy. And if I fail, I need to know how to live a life beyon
d that. Because that’s the part that scares me the most.”

  Isaac let his arms fall to his side and he just stood there, staring ahead, surrounded by horse manure and the promise of a future that was as glaringly bright as the white on white fields around him.

  “Let me know all the right things to say, and when to say them. Let me know when to hold her close, and when to let her walk away. Let me know when to comfort her, and when to let her cry. I promise I’ll pray more often… I might even turn up to church sometime… who knows, but if you help me out just this once, then I promise I’ll, uh…”

  Isaac faltered over his words, his head lifting quickly.

  “Uh, I’ll promise that I’ll…”

  His solemn focus was suddenly broken and he opened his eyes, glancing across the fields in the general direction of Briar’s Creek.

  A strange popping sound filled the emptiness and at first, he couldn’t quite place it. It sounded like a twig being snapped under the weight of a man’s foot. But that wasn’t it. It was louder than that, despite the jealous dance between the thunder and lightning that surrounded him, he could hear it, much louder than that.

  It was stronger, more intense.

  And as he leaned into the sound, that’s when he saw it. A bright orange glow that bled into the darkness of the stormy sky.

  Isaac had been gone for just over an hour when Olivia first heard the noise.

  She wasn’t sure if she was dreaming it or not, but as her mind drifted in and out of sleep, her head heavy on the pillow, her body deliciously spent and completely satisfied, she heard the noise again and she sat up suddenly in Isaac’s bed as if she’d just been poked with a hot iron.

  Thunder sounded off in the distance, and the wind roared an angry protest against the side of the house, but Olivia pushed past those sounds and swiveled in the bed so that she was looking out the window toward the barn, her eyes straining to see as patchy rainclouds hung low and gloomy in the big Montana sky.

  Maybe Isaac was back already?

  But she didn’t think so. He would have come to her. Let her know he was home. Wouldn’t he?

  Isaac hadn’t locked the back screen door when he’d left, and now it banged against the timber frame with every blustery breath, over and over again.

  But that wasn’t the sound.

  The sound was coming from the barn, so Olivia slipped out from under the covers and pulled on the same underwear, jeans and sweater that she’d been wearing the day before as a loud clap of thunder suddenly sounded, so loud and frightening that she covered her ears and quickened her pace.

  The bitterly cold December air washed over her when she pushed through the back screen and stepped outside, the earthy scent of lumber and damp hay filling her lungs as she entered the barn.

  The window at the very back of the barn was open, making a small kerosene lantern swing and clang against the timber frame.

  Dust and straw flew up and all around her, and Olivia’s vision was cloudy as she squeezed through the small gap that was left between Isaac’s truck and the side wall of the barn. The place was full of tools and boxes of parts, an old engine, and blankets wrapped together with thick twine, and Olivia had to scramble over a plow just to get to the window.

  Her eyes drifted to the flickering lantern swinging wildly back and forth on the hook. Under different circumstances, the rusty old antique would have been beautiful, but in that moment something felt ominous, and Olivia studied the barn with new eyes.

  Wary eyes.

  She took another step toward the lantern and her eyes snapped to the right. A shadow moved across the back of the plow and then it was gone. The windows on that side of the barn were boarded up and there were a few weeds poking up through the cracks of the barnwood slats, but Olivia knew she’d seen something.

  She’d felt it.

  Something niggled at her, an old wound that she suddenly wanted to pick at again.

  Maybe it was a stray cat? Or maybe it wasn’t?

  The sound of old hinges creaking ricocheted around the barn and for a moment Olivia couldn’t tell if the sound was coming from in front or from behind her.

  She startled, stood on something and then froze, half-bent as she went to retrieve it. A lighter. A green cigarette lighter.

  “What the hell?” she whispered.

  Her voice was shaky as she picked the lighter up and turned the cracked green plastic over in her hands. It was the same lighter Kyle had used to taunt Isaac with at the festival, and a sick feeling filled her stomach, making her want to cry and throw up at the same time.

  She spun around, her eyes sweeping from one side of the barn to the other, but there was no one there. And that’s when she smelled the smoke, the first flames flickering to life right there in front of her.

  A crackle. A popping sound. A loud bang. And then more flames. Olivia knew she was trapped. She watched on in terror as the flames crept higher and higher in front of her—blocking her from the open doors—growing faster and stronger around her, and she backed up so quickly that her backside hit the tailgate of Isaac’s truck.

  For a brief moment, she considered climbing up inside the truck to escape the flames, only to realize that she didn’t have the keys, so that wouldn’t get her anywhere, and even if she did, she would still be trapped.

  “Help!” she screamed.

  Another enormous gust of wind blew through the barn and the flames seemingly danced and leaped for joy, a new lease of life bestowed upon them, and Olivia knew that if she didn’t make a run for it soon then she would be eaten alive by the inferno.

  She hauled a heavy burlap sack from an old chair. It was covered in dust and distorted her vision, but she didn’t hesitate. She didn’t have time if she wanted to get out of the barn alive.

  She hunched over as low as she could, coughing from the smoke that billowed through the barn and seeped into her lungs—it was black and thick and quickly devoured the fresh air—and in that moment she realized that going through the flames was impossible.

  But she could skirt around them if she was quick enough, and she rushed across the barn behind the plow toward a side window, using every ounce of strength left in her body to shove it open.

  But it wouldn’t budge.

  She leaned back, using her shoulder to force it a little harder this time. When that didn’t work, she worked her fingernails into the frame, trying to slide it open from the bottom up, but it was locked tight and no amount of strength was going to shift it.

  Olivia’s fingers bled from the wood sinking into her flesh and with one last-ditch effort she yanked off her shoe and slammed the heel hard into the glass.

  A tiny crack splintered across the pane, but it would never be enough—the glass was thick, equipped to handle the harsh Montana winters and it was just too strong.

  Olivia turned just in time to find the flames growing with intensity, and the longer she stared at it, the worse it became.

  The fire roared with life and the power of it pushed her back hard against the side wall. Her shoulder stung from the impact.

  The flames crawled across the floor until they met a bale of dry hay and then Olivia spun around, her vision drawn to the flickering lantern swinging back and forth. Kerosene dripped from its base, leaking out in a puddle across the dirt floor, and soaking into the bale of dry hay stacked below it.

  A moment later the lantern fell from the hook, crashing to the floor, glass shattering everywhere, the entire bale immediately bursting into flames.

  Olivia gasped in shock, almost choking from the heavy black smoke, desperately trying to think clearly and search for a means of escape. The other bales of hay ignited within seconds and the door and the window were swiftly engulfed in flames.

  That was it. She was trapped.

  And there was no way out.

  Olivia felt like she was dreaming.

  And it was the most wonderful dream too, for in that dream Isaac was calling her name, begging her to reach out and take his
hand, and his handsome face smiled down at her from across a rushing river, and he called her name over and over again.

  He was desperate for them to be together.

  And of course, Olivia wanted that too, more than anything else, but every time she stretched out for his hand, the river came alive with red-hot lava and she had to pull her hand back again or she would be burned alive.

  The heat was unbearable.

  Isaac yelled her name again.

  But this time she knew she wasn’t dreaming. She blinked and rubbed her eyes.

  “OLIVIA!”

  Isaac screamed louder than he’d ever screamed before. His voice was filled with panic, so much so that he didn’t even recognize the sound as coming from his own throat. He stared at the approaching fire and his eyes filled with tears.

  Terror tugged at his insides, tore at his muscles, and he fought every urge he had not to run.

  How could this be happening? Again?

  The memories appeared like dark shadows in the back of his mind. His mother’s beautiful face disappeared along with the smoke and the screaming and the shocking pain. He had been so small then, so defenseless with no possible way of saving her, but he was a man now and he was strong and capable.

  He was no longer that scared little boy, and for once Isaac looked to the future instead of the past. Olivia was his future and nothing—not the terror racing through his bones, not the fear eating away at his scars—nothing, was going to stop him from saving her life.

  After running as fast as he could all the way over from the corrals, his lungs and his legs felt like heavy weights, but while he’d prayed for courage just moments before, he prayed for something else this time. He prayed for a miracle.

  “Olivia… can you hear me? I’m coming!”

  “Isaac!” Olivia cried out. “I’m in here… please, Isaac, please help me!”

  Isaac felt all the blood rush to his extremities. The sense of relief was overwhelming. Olivia was alive. And for now, that’s all he cared about. Fear dug into his core but he pushed it away.