My Heart to Hold: A Maxwell Family Saga - Book Two

by Alexander, S. B.

  “Okay,” she said with a half smile. “I’ll have Celia drop me off.”

  Without thinking, I leaned down and kissed her quickly on the lips.

  She froze.

  Before I could read anything into her stiff lips, I said, “I’ll see you later.” Then I jogged out. Within a minute, I barreled into the locker room full of shouts and excitement. The guys were high on adrenaline for sure.

  “There he is,” Woods said, swiping a towel over his blond hair.

  “Speech,” Liam shouted as he tore off his jersey.

  I’d never been a leader, but my dad had always believed I had it in me to lead a team. But I wasn’t the one who’d won the game. I stood up on one of the benches. Making speeches in the locker room was becoming a habit.

  I swiveled my head around the room. “Listen up. First, great teamwork. You guys played your asses off. You’re the ones who deserve the credit.” I sought out Chase, who was standing against a locker across from me. “Chase, dude, you’re the MVP of this game. You brought this team together.” That was the truth. He’d done more than he had in the last two games, and frankly, I would’ve sworn I was looking at a different guy.

  He waved his hand around. “All of us put in the hard work. But I think I found my position. Honestly, I never thought I could do as good a job as Alex at point guard.”

  “You were made for it, man,” Miller shouted.

  Chase considered me. “Maxwell, is it true you’ll be moving at the end of the school year?”

  All heads rounded on me, and the sound in the locker room died. Only my family knew we might move. Well, Quinn did too. But it wasn’t as if I were keeping it a secret. What the next school year held for me was up in the air.

  I swallowed the elephant in my throat. I hated to disappoint the guys. We were starting to gel as a team—a team that could be awesome and win championships.

  Kade came in, standing near the entrance to the bathroom area.

  “Well, are you moving?” Woods asked.

  I looked at Kade as though he could give me the answer, but I knew he couldn’t.

  He just nodded.

  I wasn’t sure what to make of that, but the guys needed to know. “I can’t answer that.” I made a point to lock eyes with each of them. Then I filled them in on my aunt Denise. “Look, guys. Let’s not let the fact that I might move ruin the rest of our season. We have a good shot to go to the playoffs.”

  Kade crossed large arms over his chest. “He’s right. Let’s keep up the momentum. Coach and I will see you at practice tomorrow.”

  Excited chatter ensued as the guys changed and talked about the game.

  I went over to my locker. “Chase, where did you hear that rumor?”

  He lifted his foot up on the bench to untie his shoe. “Tessa overheard your sister telling a friend in the cafeteria. I figured it was true if it came from a good source. Sorry about your aunt too.”

  I peeled off my uniform. “Thanks, man.”

  I hoped I could continue to play for Kensington next year and the year after. But my sole focus at the moment was Quinn. So I got my butt into gear.

  An hour and a half later, Celia was pulling into the Maxwell estate. I was thirty minutes late, thanks to Tessa and the heated discussion we’d had over the darn skate-off.

  Tessa didn’t want to reschedule. “Either skate, or I win,” she’d said in her venomous tone.

  I’d almost forfeited. But Celia and Brianna had worked hard to set up everything and sell tickets. I couldn’t and wouldn’t let them down. Besides, I’d made the deal. I had to see it through.

  “Don’t forget to ask if we can have the competition here,” Celia said as I opened the passenger door.

  I nodded and jumped out.

  “Oh, and Quinn, have fun making up with Maiken.”

  Grinning, I dashed up to the front door, my belly swirling with excitement. Honestly, nothing mattered much anymore except Maiken. I would be devastated if he moved away. I would die a thousand deaths for sure.

  Think positive.

  The door opened before I could ring the bell.

  Emma flicked her brown hair off her shoulder. “I saw you through the window.

  I stepped in, and we exchanged a hug. I hadn’t had a chance to say much to her at the game. She’d been busy watching her younger sisters. “It’s great you’re back.”

  “So, about this skate-off,” she said. “What can I do to help? Are you going to practice on the lake? I got skates for Christmas, you know.”

  I let out a small laugh. “Slow down.”

  Lots of squealing and giggling filtered out of the living room off the foyer.

  “Maiken has been playing with Charlotte and Harlan since he got home.”

  I peeked in. A fire crackled in the fireplace as Charlotte, Harlan, and Maple climbed on top of Maiken, tickling him.

  Maple hopped off, her sandy-blond pigtails swinging in the process. “Quinn,” she cooed.

  At the mention of my name, Maiken lifted his head. “Okay, guys.” He tried to get up, but Charlotte, the nine-year-old, protested.

  “Pizza is here,” Lacey shouted.

  I guess I wasn’t as late as I’d thought.

  Emma extended her hand. “Come on, kids. Let’s eat.”

  “Quinn and I will be there in a minute,” Maiken said to Emma.

  Harlan ran up to me. “Hi, Quinn.” His curly mass of hair was all over the place.

  I couldn’t help but smile, which was a stark contrast from earlier when Harlan had had me on the verge of tears. He’d run out on court after the game and into Maiken’s arms. The brotherly love between them was so sweet and intense that Lacey had had tears in her eyes.

  Wrangling in the kids, Emma said, “Don’t take too long, or else all the pizza will be gone.”

  With a family of eight kids, I would imagine she was right.

  Maiken lazily raked his gaze over me. His cheeks were red, and his hair was a mess.

  My breathing ramped up, and my pulse followed suit. I stabbed a thumb at the foyer. “M-maybe we should join the crowd.”

  He stalked toward me, his bare feet sinking into the thick white carpet as he closed the distance between us.

  I licked my dry lips as my emotions wreaked havoc inside me. Suddenly, I had the urge to shout to the world that I loved Maiken Maxwell.

  I dared not share that yet. What if he didn’t say it back or didn’t feel the same way? I couldn’t risk having my heart sliced and diced like a tomato on a cutting board.

  My panic was short lived when Maiken’s warm, large hands landed on my cold cheeks, which were heating up now that his lips were an inch away from mine.

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  “I’m the one who’s s-sorry. I overreacted, and I shouldn’t have used you to get to T-Tessa.”

  “That night at Shakers, I wanted to kiss you so badly. Don’t ever think that I don’t.” Then his lips were on mine—warm and soft.

  I sucked in a breath, and when I did, he pushed his tongue in. An explosion of stars coated my vision as I returned the kiss.

  The voices in the house dulled as I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. I wanted to stay like this forever.

  He broke away. “We should stop.” His voice sounded strained.

  All I could do was nod as Momma’s words blared in my head. First loves are extremely emotional, and those emotions can drive two people to make rash decisions without thinking.

  “So no crutches?” he asked with pinched features.

  “My ankle is a little better, but I have it wr-wrapped pretty tight right now.”

  “What about skating?”

  “We’re postponing the skate-off for a week to help my ankle heal, but Brianna is unsure if she can get the rink again.”

  He held my hand as we headed to the kitchen. “Why don’t you use the lake?”

  Surprise fluttered through me, making me angle my head. “I was going to ask Kade that very thing?�
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  He gave me a blushing grin. “Great minds.”

  “Ask me what?” Kade asked behind me.

  I didn’t hear his footsteps. Nevertheless, I turned around.

  Kade stood tall. His hair was damp, and his copper eyes were prodding me.

  The three of us entered the kitchen amid a flurry of giggles, hands grabbing pizza, and a couple of burps from the boys. I explained to Kade what we had in mind and that the head count was probably thirty or so kids.

  Kade joined the kids at the island. “No problem. We’ve had parties at the lake a few times. Haven’t we, Lace?”

  Lacey blew hair from her forehead as she wiped Harlan’s mouth. “They were doozies too.”

  “It’s not a party,” I said. “Tessa and I will be skating.”

  Emma chewed on her pizza at the island. “Who’s judging the competition?”

  I’d learned earlier that the plan was to have the crowd cast votes. “The people who bought tickets.”

  Ethan snagged a pizza from one of eight pizza boxes that were spread out over the island. “I’m going down to the family room to watch TV with Marcus and Jasper.”

  “Wait,” Lacey said. “Take more pizza.”

  On Ethan’s way out, he clapped his free hand on Maiken’s shoulder. “Great game, bro. I’m proud of you.” Then he was gone.

  Maiken and I found two empty barstools and sat down to eat. It was officially a great night. I’d made up with my boyfriend. Kade had given us the thumbs-up to use the lake. Now all I needed to do was practice my skating routine. Hopefully, my ankle would cooperate.

  Four days had passed since Quinn and I had kissed and made up. Since then, we hadn’t had a chance to spend any time together. Kade still had me coming home from school right after practice and doing my homework, although I’d been procrastinating on writing the poem I had due for English that week.

  I stared at a blank piece of paper, wiggling the pen in my hand. Maybe with the tsunami of a snowstorm raging outside my bedroom window that Sunday, school would be canceled the next day. Snowstorm or not, I had to come up with a poem. I laughed. I wasn’t a writer.

  You may not be, but think of something, or else you’ll fail English. I couldn’t let that happen. I was the captain of the basketball team. As their leader, I had to be the model student. “Lead by example” had always been my dad’s motto.

  I kicked out my legs, snagged my phone, and texted Quinn:

  What are you doing? I miss you.

  I hadn’t been able to see her on Saturday because of the weekend blizzard that had kept everyone inside.

  A knock sounded at my door before Emma came in. “Movie starts in ten.”

  I pushed to my feet. “A movie is better than English.”

  She sat on Ethan’s bed.

  With all my siblings back in Ashford, we were once again living in Uncle Martin’s home since the one Kade and Lacey had been living in was too small for eight kids and two adults.

  A sour expression crossed Emma’s face. “I talked to Mom.”

  A prickly feeling spread over my skin. “Is everything okay?”

  She slumped her shoulders. “We shouldn’t be here. We should be at Mom’s side. She’s been crying every night, Maiken. She needs help. She needs us.”

  My heart broke in two as I sat beside her. “I know, but we have school, and she can’t take care of Aunt Denise with all of us there.”

  She fiddled with her fingers, something she always did when she was nervous or sad. “I know.”

  I draped my arm around her. “We’ll get through this.” I didn’t believe my own words, but as a big brother, I had to instill some hope in her and all my brothers and sisters. I just didn’t know how. I barely had any myself.

  She rested her head on my shoulder. “Our lives are falling apart. Dad’s death is really hitting me all of a sudden.”

  I pulled her tighter to me, and she started crying.

  During all the craziness surrounding Dad’s death and funeral, Emma had been the one to keep a smile on most of our faces.

  She buried her face in my chest, her body shuddering as she let out all her pain. All I could do was shed tears as I rubbed her back.

  Light footsteps resonated in the hall. “Emma. Maiken,” Lacey said.

  Emma pulled away, wiping away her tears.

  Concern filled Lacey’s bright-green eyes as she regarded us. “Is it about your mom? I’m sorry. I overheard you talking to her, Emma.”

  “That and our dad,” I muttered.

  Lacey smoothed a hand down her black leggings. “I have an idea. Bundle up. All of us are going for a hike.”

  “There must be like a foot of snow out there,” I said.

  “Snow isn’t going to hurt anyone. Now get dressed.” Her tone was firm. “We’ll meet down by the garage in ten minutes.” She left with determination in her step.

  “What do you think?” Emma asked, downtrodden.

  “I think we shouldn’t get on her bad side.”

  Emma smiled for the first time since she’d walked in. “I think you’re right. I’ll go get dressed.” She started for the door. “Maiken, I love you.”

  I choked back my emotions. “I love you too, sis.”

  My phone beeped with a text from Quinn.

  Quinn: My ankle is feeling much better. I was going to practice on the lake, but with the snow, I probably shouldn’t. So I’m taking Apple out for a ride. She loves the snow. You could ride with me?

  Maiken: LOL.

  Quinn: I’m going to get you on a horse yet.

  Maiken: Not today. We’re going for a hike.

  Quinn: Hike?

  Maiken: Lacey has something up her sleeve. Not sure. But I’ll call you later?

  She sent two heart emojis.

  Fifteen minutes later, Lacey was holding Charlotte’s hand on one side and Harlan’s hand on the other as she led the way down toward the lake. Emma shuffled behind her, holding Maple’s hand. Marcus, Jasper, and Ethan walked together in front of Kade and me. All of us were wrapped in hats, boots, scarfs, and winter coats.

  The snow floated to the ground as Harlan talked animatedly about squirrels even though we didn’t see any at the moment.

  “Where are we going?” Emma asked.

  “Just follow Lacey,” Kade said.

  We left the open landscape of the backyard and trudged into the woods. Trees towered over us, their branches creating a snow-covered canopy as though we were walking through a tunnel.

  The path narrowed around the lake, causing us to file behind one another in twos. Before long, we left the tunnel of trees and were standing in a large open clearing with the lake on our right. The snow wasn’t as high on that side of the lake. I suspected that the trees had captured most of the light, fluffy stuff.

  Lacey ambled over to a large, flat rock that poked out of the snow. “Gather around.”

  It was then I remembered what Kade had told me about Karen’s memorial.

  Kade guided Harlan, Maple, and Charlotte until they were standing in front of the rock.

  “What’s happening?” Ethan whispered.

  “You’ll see.” I found a spot behind Harlan, Maple, and Charlotte.

  Jasper, Marcus, Ethan, and Emma followed.

  Lacey cleared the snow off the rock, revealing the initials KM that were etched deep into the stone.

  “I don’t get it,” Jasper, my thirteen-year-old brother, said. “You brought us all the way out here for a rock?”

  “My thoughts exactly,” Marcus muttered at Jasper’s side.

  “Jasper,” Emma scolded. “Manners.”

  Kade, who was now beside Lacey, raised a hand. “It’s okay. Lacey had a similar reaction when I first brought her out here.”

  Ethan settled on my right. “I hope this is good,” he said in a low voice.

  Lacey swung her gaze around. “When I met Kade, I was in a bad place in my life much like you. I was mourning the death of my mom and my sister. I had just moved to town.
I was new in school, and being a female baseball player, I made enemies. It seemed nothing was going right for me.”

  Kade tugged his wife to him as she continued.

  “Honestly, if it wasn’t for Kade showing me Karen’s memorial, I’m not sure I would’ve healed as fast as I did. Don’t get me wrong—I think about my mom and sister endlessly. But I don’t think of how they died. I think of how they lived. I remember all the good times we had, the laughs, the vacations, and fun we had. Your dad was a very special person.”

  Maple, my eleven-year-old sister, sniffled. “We miss him.”

  Charlotte knelt down in the snow and touched the flat stone. “I talk to my daddy every night while I’m in bed.”

  Lacey mimicked Charlotte’s position on the other side of the rock. “What do you talk about?”

  “I tell him about my day, and I tell him when Harlan is bad.”

  Most of us laughed at the last part.

  Harlan followed suit. “I do too.”

  That got another round of laughter.

  Lacey rose, adjusting her hat over her ears. “I brought you out here to show you how Kade and his brothers remember their sister. This is their place to connect with Karen, to talk about the good times, to laugh at something she said or did. It’s their way of celebrating and honoring her life.”

  “Rather than mourn,” Kade said. “I want all of you to think of a way to celebrate your dad. Decide on something together. It doesn’t have to be right now, but talk about it as a family.”

  “We’re never in a place long enough to do something like this,” Emma said.

  “I’m sure we will be soon enough.” I punched as much confidence as I could into that line. We didn’t know what next year would bring, but I sure prayed Ashford would be our home.

  I agreed with what Ethan had said to me. “We can’t keep moving. We can’t keep leaving friends behind.” I couldn’t leave Quinn or basketball. Not only that, all of us had to feel like we belonged somewhere. We couldn’t keep living like gypsies. Otherwise, we would never heal.

  “Never forget we’re family.” Lacey’s voice made me blink. “We’re here for you.”

  Marcus, who looked more like me with his blue eyes, knelt down near Charlotte, swiping his hand over the flat rock. “Why are there five hearts underneath Karen’s initials?”