A rose should be red: Part 1 - Secrets
Page 1
Back cover text
After the mysterious passing of her father Rick, Jenny and her mother have moved back to London.
To the city where a lot of bad things happened.
Yet, she wants to get better, wants to live … to be normal … to let go of her dark past.
The past that has torn her apart and made her live only for the people who were around her.
She is a broken girl who had to suffer a lot.
Unfairly.
New people have entered her life, even the handsome gentleman Tyler who seems to respect and cherish Jenny with all his heart.
A kind young man and indeed handsome!
Like, really handsome. His deep blue eyes always give her the chills, they draw her into a world filled with new emotions.
At first, she keeps her distance since she is afraid of men.
But after some time, she allows herself to let him get close to her.
With each day that passes by, new questions arise.
Scary eyes watch her, people observe her every move …
As she tries to find her old friend Alice, shocking secrets and horrible truths are revealed.
And the more answers she discovers, the darker her life becomes …
A thrilling romance with drama and action.
Welcome to the world of Jenny Brown.
Intro
Thoughts are an obstacle.
Sometimes my mind was getting crazy with thoughts.
Why couldn’t I have a normal life?
Why did everything happen to me?
Questions over questions…
Can someone help a ravished girl?
Could someone love this girl who didn’t even love herself?
Well, I tried my best.
I tried to forget my horrible past, tried to forget the pain, the suffering.
But what if the past becomes the present again?
What if the past started hunting me?
Was I imagining things?
Maybe … But I couldn’t stop the feeling of being watched.
Important people, precious people who helped me, who meant everything to me…
• Lies
I hated liars.
But can you hate beloved people?
• Love
I have never felt love before.
I couldn’t define love in any way.
But why did I feel different?
Especially about Tyler Williams!
A man who was nothing like the others.
Kind-hearted, good-mannered, amazing, and handsome!
But sometimes I had the feeling that he was hiding things…
• Friends
I only had one friend in my life.
Her name was Alice … She wasn’t just a friend. She was more of an angel because she helped me out of my misery.
She helped me out of the darkness, I was kept in for many years.
But after some time, we parted …
I never saw her again.
Since then, four years had passed.
Now I was back in London, were I met Tyler and all the others.
And now that I was here, I had to find Alice!
But on my way, I uncovered the truth.
Many sorrowful mysteries which nearly tore me apart…
How did We end up here?
My left arm was hurting badly, my breath was out of control.
But I didn't care about that.
I heaved myself up from the bed I was lying on.
Even though it hurt, I still pulled myself together, so I didn't wake up Tyler, who was sleeping soundly for the first time since we got here.
His beautiful blond hair was a mess, his upper body was lying on my side.
He was sleeping in the most uncomfortable position, even though he was hurt.
His finger was still touching my leg.
I wanted to stretch my arm out and move him into a better position.
I wanted to touch his handsome face.
I really wanted to hug him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but I couldn't do that.
Not now… not after all the things that had happened.
I didn’t have much time left, and without any shoes on, I rushed out the chamber.
The patient gown wasn’t really giving me safety from the cold air, but I didn’t care.
My body was trembling, all my wounds ached.
Yet, I tried to leave the hospital quietly.
It was a bit difficult since the nurses were informed to keep an eye on me.
But somehow, I managed to sneak out of the hospital.
It was dark and cold outside.
Luckily, the rain stopped, but the ground was wet and muddy.
Some streetlights lit up my vision.
My body felt numb.
The pain was replaced with concern and worry.
I needed to be faster, I was afraid to be late.
She could be on this bridge… the one that came into my mind wasn’t far away from here.
I just hoped that I was right.
The closer I got, the more my body wanted to give in.
But I pulled myself together.
>>It isn’t far away from the hospital, you can do it, Jenny!<<
I started running, my legs did it on their own.
I felt how some of my stitches split open on my back, sweat and blood mixed together.
My body was burning up.
And before I even knew, I was lying on the ground.
My body was at its limit, on the edge of giving in.
What if I was too late?
What should I do?
Pictures of her came into my mind.
She was such a lovely girl, she shouldn’t be suffering and thinking like this!
I couldn't stop now.
I needed to get up.
Somehow, I managed to do it.
I heaved myself up and started moving my legs again.
The streetlights showed me the way to the bridge, and as I set one foot on it, I felt the heavy burden on my heart.
A heavy feeling…
Everything that had happened was unfair.
I almost died, yet I wished I hadn’t survived.
A dark shadow appeared behind a streetlight.
Looking again, I saw the silhouette standing on the edge of the parapet.
I didn’t know how to approach her without scaring her.
“Please, don’t come near me.”
My body was shaking in fear, she didn't even look at me, yet she spoke those words with a trembling voice.
“I don’t deserve to live.”
“N-No! P-Please, let us talk!”
My voice sounded rough, as if I hadn’t spoken in years.
The stuttering, I couldn't control it.
But she recognised my voice and turned to look at me.
Her eyes were wide open, her face turned pale.
“Why are you here?”
She whispered in shock, yet I could hear her perfectly.
It was only us on this bridge, no one else was here.
Normal, since it was in the middle of the night.
The wind and the sound of the water dancing together and splashing around were the only noises besides my heavy breathing.
“You are bleeding.”
“I-I don’t care. P-Please, get down from there!”
“NO! I WON’T! I DESERVE THIS! AFTER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED!”
She screamed out loud and turned again, ready to jump.
I couldn't believe it, with every fibre of my being, I prayed and wished that this wasn't happening.
I couldn't let her die.
********************
Contents
Back cover text
Intro
How did We end up here?
Prolog
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Close
∞∞∞
I won't push you away. Let us become a bit more honest. I still don't know your heart.
∞∞∞
Prolog
“Nearly finished.”
I muttered while mowing the lawn in the backyard.
The lawnmower wasn’t really easy to handle, but I gave it my best.
Sweat was running down my forehead as the sun was shining with its full brightness on me.
It felt good.
Normally … the sky would be cloudy, the rain would be either pouring down constantly or stop for some hours before it would start again.
It always had a depressing atmosphere, which I still needed to get used to.
But today the sun came out and the sky was blue.
We had just recently moved into a new house; it wasn’t big but enough for my mother and me.
It had two bedrooms, one kitchen, a big living room, one bathroom, and it had a big garden which looked like it hadn’t been taken care of in a while.
To be more specific, it looked more like a jungle.
The grass was overgrown, the flowers all dead, and rebelling weeds were everywhere.
Well, spring had just begun, so I knew that nobody had cared about it before.
But since the weather was good, I just couldn’t take the sight of it anymore and started working on it.
It took me over two hours to pull out the weeds, renew the flowerbed, and last but not least, mow the lawn.
The sun was shining, the birds were flying around, singing loud, the sound of the lawnmower couldn’t surpass the tone of nature, and it really made me relax.
I needed to distract myself, working on the garden helped me a lot.
My clothes were covered in dirt and some grass was stuck on my pants.
It was natural to look like this after working in the garden.
I got into the last corner of the lawn, then I turned off the lawnmower.
“Finished.”
With my last strength, I shoved the mower into the garden shed and then I laid down on the freshly mowed lawn.
I took in a deep breath and smiled.
“Now … it looks beautiful.”
I was staring at the blue sky and noticed some thin clouds, which were shaped into little hearts.
The atmosphere and the feeling of being hugged by the sun left me at ease.
A grasshopper was jumping from stem to stem, and white butterflies danced over the meadow.
I wished that every day would be as peaceful as today.
However, I knew that this moment would last only for a short while.
“Jenny, didn’t I tell you to let the gardener do this job? You shouldn't get your hands dirty!” My mother yelled as she was stomping over to my side.
She folded her arms across her hips to make her words sound stronger.
Although she wanted to look angry … her sparkling green eyes couldn't lie.
In spite of being angry, she was clearly happy that her garden didn't look like a haunted woodland anymore.
Her shadow darkened my view as she appeared next to me.
It covered up the sun, and I started to see her more clearly.
“Even though I am angry that you disobeyed me, the garden … It looks great. You did a great job…”
She had never been good at giving compliments.
“Sorry, but I wanted to do it myself,” I apologised.
“There is no need to apologise. And never apologise for something you don't even mean.” A loose blonde hair fell down her forehead, whilst she shook her head.
Then she looked at me sternly and raised her eyebrows, eyeing my clothes.
Yes, I looked really dirty, even my fingers were covered with the flower soil, but this was normal when you worked in the garden.
A moment passed as she was thinking.
“You better go and take a long bath. School will start tomorrow, and I don't want you to smell like a dirty cow!”
Ouch, here she went again.
Without any sound, I got up and brushed off some dirt off my jeans.
My body felt heavy, the work has been harder than I expected, and it felt like my arms could fall off my body anytime soon. But my mum was right, I needed to at least take a shower before I could lay down on my bed.
“You should also get a haircut, your long hair will be an obstacle in the future.”
I heard her, but I didn't want to give her a chance to start a discussion with me, that’s why I took my leave, after I nodded my head, agreeing to her comment.
Just to make it clear, I was not a teen girl who had problems with her mother because of puberty.
Well, this could be a funny experience, but sadly I never had the chance to experience this…
“I prefer this sight.”
A male voice had appeared, which made my heartbeat race as soon as I recognised whom this voice belonged to.
Tyler Williams.
“Good evening Jenny! I see you’ve been working hard.”
My legs stopped moving.
My eyes saw the black shoes first, before scrolling up to the long, trained legs, which were dressed in black pants, looking slowly up to his wide shoulders. He wore a black suit with a white shirt that was a bit tight, because you could see his muscles with his every move.
His neck was perfect, long enough for a woman to kiss. He had a chiselled jawline with a two-day old beard. His lips were full … And there were these deep-blue eyes which were dangerous because it seemed as if they could see through every inch of your soul. Tyler had a golden skin tone, perfectly matching his long blond hair.
Actually, the only thing missing right now was the slow motion and wind machine that could blow his hair out of his face to make his look complete.
He was just perfect.
A handsome human being…
But he was trouble for my confused heart.
“Hey.” I mumbled.
He looked down at me.
“Not bad! It is quite a view.”
I didn’t know if he meant the garden because his eyes weren’t looking at it at all.
“Thanks.”
My instinct told me to keep this conversation as short as possible, because the longer I stood in front of him, the more I would feel these crazy feelings in my stomach area.
But whoops, it was too late!
He did the same as me.
He was checking me out from bottom to top, the higher he got, the more his lips curled into a teasing smile.
There my heart went again, it started to stumble over itself.
“It seems like the grass didn’t want to let go of you.”
He stretched out his hand and removed some dirt off my shirt.
This slight touch made my cheeks flush.
“T-Thank you! But I need to go now.”
The stutter came out without me wanting it, but I couldn’t change it.
Due my heavy heartbeat, my movements started to get clumsy.
I stumbled over nothing, but Tyler grabbed me before I could collide with the ground.
His hand was holding mine.
“I guess …” he whispered. “The gap betwe
en my fingers were meant for yours.”
With a troubled face, I moved away from him and rushed into the house.
I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly as I headed to the bathroom.
Trying to control my heavy heartbeat and the fact that Tyler was here again.
My hand was tingling as if thousands of ants were crawling over it.
Oh god… I should keep my distance…
I tried to distract myself by going faster.
The hallway was long and pretty, the walls were big and beautiful, with white and golden crowns displayed on them.
We had two floors, downstairs were the kitchen, a little dining room, and the big living room, and upstairs were our bedrooms and bathroom.
My mother was special in many ways … But she hadn’t been like that before.
I sighed as I opened the door to the bathroom.
Without wasting much time, I undressed myself and threw the dirty clothes into a basket.
The bathroom itself was simple.
It had a toilet, a big bathtub, next to it a shower, the bathroom sink was between the shower and the door.
We also had, as an accessory, a huge full-body mirror.
I placed myself in front of it and looked at the reflection.
My face was pale, my eyes also looked tired, the dark circles beneath them could compete with a panda.
You would think that I had the green eyes from my mother, but sadly not.
Elise, my mother, was not related to me in any way.
Also, her husband Rick, who passed away early this year, wasn't my real father.
They adopted me.
Before Rick died, I felt loved … both were there for me, and we lived happily.
But after his passing, Elise changed.
She always looked exhausted, and sometimes I had the feeling as if she didn’t know how to act with me.
I did understand that this big loss affected us all … but I didn't understand her change.
Rick had been a very loving father with short brown hair, beautiful brown eyes, and he always had a little smile on his small face.
But sadly, he died young … he only made it to an age of forty-nine.
It was a big shock, yet the most terrible thing for me was that I didn't know the cause of his death.
I didn't know at all.
Elise didn't want to tell me about it.
All I knew is that on 17th January 2012 … I was home alone, reading a book. Everything was quiet, but suddenly, my mother came running in.