Wrong For Me

by Meagan Brandy

  “For a fake detective, he sure remembered that bulletproof vest, didn’t he?”

  “Guess he knew what a dirty bastard he was. I’m holding out hope that he gets a nice, big cellmate to play with.” He smirks.

  I can’t help but smile a little, and Havannah laughs lightly.

  When she does, Bennett’s eyes slide her way, and she grins, averting her gaze.

  “You can go now,” my dad tells him.

  Without a word, he turns and walks out.

  “Dad!” My brows jump, and his frown slides to me.

  He lightly shakes his head as Havannah shifts in her seat.

  “Long night.” He clears his throat. “I don’t wanna be interrupted right now.”

  I drop my head back against the pillow. “So, what now?”

  “Now, we get ready to give our statements. All the documents have already been turned in. Blaze business stays hidden, and we go back to normal. While I still hope to one day have Alec be a part of Blaze on a bigger scale—assuming that’s what you want, too—the company and home revert back to me. It was only to switch over to him in the event of my death. Everything goes back to exactly how it was before all this.”

  Havannah hops from her seat, clearing her throat. “I’m gonna run to the restroom. Be right back.”

  My dad sighs in his seat, his eyes lifting to Rowan.

  I glance at Rowan, who smiles down at me and looks to my dad. “Things are different, sir. We can’t just go back.”

  My dad stares him down and then reaches inside his pocket. He hesitates a moment before holding out a gold pin for Rowan to take, but Rowan simply stares at it.

  “Take it, son. You’ve earned it. What you did last night took more than strength and courage. People sometimes think rescuing your family is second nature, but we know that’s not true. When it’s your family or people you care about”—my dad reaches out to grip my hand—“we tend to lose focus, and training goes out the window, panic taking over. And you not only saved my daughter and your brother, but you also saved a woman you didn’t know. You put aside any personal feelings you might have had and risked your own safety to save a stranger.” My dad lifts Rowan’s hand and flips it over, dropping the pin inside. “I’m proud of you, son. I’d be honored to have you as a Blaze.”

  Rowan swallows hard, a small laugh escaping him, followed by a deep sigh, and I grin.

  My best friend has grown.

  “Thank you, sir.” He stares at the pin before meeting my dad’s eyes and holding it out. “But I’d like to finish the program. I’ll earn it the way everyone else has.”

  “You’ve more than earned—”

  “Take the pin back, Dad. Let him do this.”

  My dad’s glare shifts to mine, and then he laughs, taking the pin from Rowan’s hand.

  “Wait ‘til I tell Alec about this one.” He laughs, and my muscles lock.

  My dad’s eyes come back to mine, and they slope at the edges.

  He feels guilt from the things Alec has done.

  “Honey,” he starts.

  I hold a hand out. “I know you want to say a bunch of things right now, and I love you for trying to help, but the only person I want to have this conversation with is him.”

  He frowns and tries to accept my answer, but his frown speaks volumes, and Rowan and I laugh. “Yeah, all right.”

  “All set.” The nurse walks in with my discharge papers and a wheelchair, and Rowan barks out a laugh.

  “I’m not riding in that.”

  “Sure you are.” She gives a shrewd grin. “If you wanna get outta here.”

  My shoulders slump. “Guess I am then.”

  We all stand and make our way to the door right as Havannah comes around the corner. “Outta here?”

  “Hell yes,” I whine, moving to plant my ass in the wheelchair. “I can’t wait to crawl into a bed.”

  I smile up at Rowan, and he winks.

  “Got it all ready for ya.”

  “You sure you don’t need me to come play nurse for you?” Havannah jokes, but her eyes are sad. “I can share a bed with Rowan,” she teases.

  He chokes, I laugh, and my dad frowns.

  “I’m fine, Han, and you need to get back to school. And thanks for the stuff.”

  The corner of Havannah’s lips lifts, and she bends to hug me. “Course, we’re about the same size, so everything should fit. There’s some basic hygiene stuff in there, too.”

  “Perfect.”

  “So you’ll call me after you get some rest?”

  “You’ll answer?” I pop a brow, and her cheeks grow red. I glance to my dad, seeing he’s invested in whatever Rowan is saying, so I lean closer to Havannah and whisper, “He doesn’t know you video-chatted me, does he?”

  Tears fill her eyes, and she smashes her lips together. “I’m so sorry. I had to reach you somehow, especially that day. I should have …” She looks down, and tears fall.

  “Han.”

  She glances up, disgrace lining her eyes.

  “We’ll talk later, ’kay?”

  She gives a small smile and nods.

  “You know, Mr. Rivera—” Rowan starts.

  “Trick.”

  Rowan’s lip twitches and I laugh lightly. He’s waited a long time for my dad to allow that.

  “Trick, you’re welcome to come, too. I’ve bought a new couch since Alec lit my other one on fire, and it’s soft as shit.”

  When my dad’s brow lifts and his eyes land on me, I shrug, and Rowan playfully rolls his eyes.

  My dad chuckles.

  “A man who won’t let anything get in his way is a good man,” he teases.

  Havannah mumbles under her breath.

  His forehead creases, but he looks back to Rowan. “Thanks, son, but Hillock’s got a little studio out back for me to use until we find a place.”

  “Okay, I’m leaving.” Havannah leans forward to give me a hug and whispers loudly, “I’d better hurry and try to catch me that officer in the parking lot. Even fake officers have handcuffs, right?”

  I laugh, and she winks, taking off for the visitor’s elevator.

  “I hate to be away from you already.” I reach for my dad’s hand, and his eyes fly to mine, the glower on his face smoothing out.

  “Hey”—he bends down in front of me—“you’ll never know how sorry I am for having to do that to you. But I’m here and very much okay. Not going anywhere.”

  I nod, and Rowan’s hand comes down on my shoulder.

  “Wanna come to Hillock’s with me? Plenty of room.”

  I shake my head. “Love him, but I’ll be more comfortable at Rowan’s house.”

  “Right.” He frowns a bit. “Sure you wanna leave the hospital with Alec still—”

  “I need a shower and some sleep. Better coffee.”

  Both my dad and Rowan laugh.

  “Okay. If you’re sure you’re okay with my leaving, I’m gonna go.”

  “The sooner you go, the sooner you can get us in a new home.”

  My dad smiles softly. “Call me when you get there?”

  “I will.”

  “Okay, I’ll be by first thing in the morning, and we can chat some more, just the two of us, while Rowan’s in class.” He cuts his stare to Rowan’s. “’Cause rescuing my daughter from a fire isn’t on the list of reasons for excused absences.”

  Rowan laughs, and my dad winks.

  “All right, I’m going.” He bends to kiss me on the cheek and then rushes past the elevator, choosing the stairwell instead.

  The nurse escorts us all the way down and out the door. She even waits right beside me while Rowan pulls his truck around, and then we’re headed for his house.

  Just when my eyes drift shut, Rowan starts whispering, “I wanted to love you like you deserved.”

  I shift to look at him, but his eyes stay on the road.

  “I tried. And, just when I thought I might have been falling, everything got a little blurry.”

  I don’
t say anything. He’s working through his own thoughts right now and needs me to hear what he has to say.

  “When Alec was around, it was weird, almost as if I could feel the pull between the two of you, and it freaked me out. In my mind, you were my friend, my Oakley and I didn’t want to share you.” His eyes meet mine a moment. “I had thought eventually we’d be together, figured it was just taking a little more time than expected. Then Alec would come around and I’d panic, try to force something I couldn’t make myself feel, no matter how bad I wanted to.” He gives a sad smile. “You thought you were in this alone, waiting on me, Oak, but I was waiting on me, too. I wanted to want you.

  “I’ve always cared about you, more than anyone else, and I still do. That won’t change. But I think Alec was right.”

  My brows pull in, and he briefly glances my way.

  “He told me I loved you but said that I wasn’t in love with you. He said it was because you weren’t meant for me, and deep down, I’d always known. I didn’t believe it until I pulled you from that fire. My mind was racing, and I was fucking afraid I’d lose you, afraid I’d lose my brother. But, the minute I got you on the ground and ran back in, the first thought to cross my mind was … I have to save him … for her.”

  Tears prickle in my eyes, and I unbuckle my seat belt, sliding to sit beside him. His right arm comes off the wheel, moving to wrap around my shoulders, and he drops a soft kiss to my hair. His arm tightens, and he holds me close as he drives.

  A few minutes pass before he whispers again, “I’m afraid.”

  “I know you are.”

  “I don’t understand it. And”—he swallows—“if I’m honest, I’m not so sure I’m okay with it.”

  “Do you … like Gio?”

  “He’s cool.”

  I laugh lightly and nudge him with my elbow.

  He’s quiet for a minute before he sighs. “I think about him sometimes.”

  “Like when you’re in the shower?”

  “Oakley!”

  I start laughing harder, and he joins in, taking his last turn down his street.

  When we pull against the curb, I shift toward him. “Are you embarrassed?”

  He looks out the front windshield. “Maybe. I’m not really sure. When I stop to think about it, I don’t feel … gay. I like women. I love their bodies and voices and”—he grins, swinging his eyes to mine—“parts.”

  My nose scrunches. “Ugh, pig!” I laugh, and he wraps his arms around me in a loose hug. “You know”—I tilt my head, a teasing smirk in place—“a man’s parts are quite—”

  “Okay!” he cuts me off.

  I know his wheels start spinning, and my head falls back on a laugh.

  This feels good. I’ve missed my friend.

  “Ever think that maybe it’s not men, Row, but one man?”

  He squints, looking away. “Time or two, yeah.”

  “In the shower?” I pop a brow.

  He smiles, shaking his head. “Get out of the car, jokester.”

  He pushes me, so I slide over, pushing open the passenger door, and the second my eyes lift to the house, I spot him leaning against the door. A deep frown is written across Gio’s face, his clothes wrinkled and hair a mess, like he’s been out here all day. Maybe even all night.

  “Rowan.”

  I reach back and hit his arm, and he glances my way. Then, he cuts his eyes over my shoulder and freezes.

  “I think he’s been here all night.”

  Rowan doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t even move.

  “You call him after the fire?”

  “No.”

  “You talk to him after everything that happened with Alec at Blackline?”

  “No.”

  “Hmm …” My shoulders drop. “That explains the scowl.”

  “Fuck.”

  I sigh this time. “Yeah. Come on.”

  I slide out of the car, and Rowan quickly rounds the hood to help me when I first put my weight down on my leg.

  The bullet Marissa shot hardly grazed me, but it did hit muscle, so my calf is swollen and sore as shit.

  As we grow closer, I watch Gio’s gaze search over Rowan, seeking out cuts, burns, and bruises, I’m guessing.

  He was worried.

  “Rumor at Blackline is, you went into high flames without a suit to save her.” He nods at me.

  “My brother, too.”

  “Yeah, heard that, too.” He eyes Rowan, and Rowan looks away. “Guessing you’re good?”

  “I’m good.”

  Gio nods, his forehead tightening as he shifts his stare to me and my bag in Rowan’s hand. “All right then. See ya when I see ya, I guess.”

  Rowan nods, unable to meet his eyes, and Gio walks away. Rowan moves the last few feet to the door and fumbles with the key as he tries to open it. I cover his shaky hand with mine, and he drops his forehead against it.

  “What you saw at Blackline? That was the first time that happened. And I haven’t spoken to him since.” He rolls his forehead across the door and connects his eyes with mine. “I can’t even look at him after how I acted.”

  I rub his shoulder, and his eyes drop at the edges.

  “You can, Rowan. And you need to.” I glance at Gio, who is sitting in his truck, his eyes on us. “You don’t have to lay it all out there right here and now.” I look back to Rowan. “But talk to him. Tell him about our wild night.” I chuckle, and he gives a sad smile. “Really though, I bet he’d be happy to hear anything you have to say right now. It’ll help settle his nerves, confirm you really are okay when he’s probably been assuming the worst.”

  His eyes shift between mine. “Think so?”

  “Well, he is just sitting there, in his car, waiting to see what move you make.”

  Rowan’s gaze snaps that way, and I laugh, lightly shoving him forward. He walks down the grass with his eyes on his feet.

  Once he realizes he’s headed for him, Gio leans over and pushes open the passenger door.

  Rowan steps up, folding his arms against the roof as he pokes his head in.

  With a small smile, I turn the key the rest of the way and step inside, dropping my bag on the floor in the entranceway.

  I hobble into the kitchen and grab a water from the fridge. Then, I pull the Wingstop menu from his menu drawer and move to settle on the new couch.

  A few minutes later, the door opens.

  “So …” I call.

  Then, Rowan steps up to the back of the couch, followed by Gio a second later.

  Gio looks a little anxious, and Rowan looks a little unsure.

  “I was thinking …” I start, and they both grow rigid. “Chicken wings and Stranger Things?” I scrunch my nose, and the boys laugh, easing the tension for all of us.

  “Mind if I use your bathroom a minute?” Gio asks.

  Rowan points him in the right direction.

  The second he’s out of sight, Rowan moves around the sofa and drops beside me.

  With a soft smile, he moves the hair from my face, leaning down to kiss my cheek. “I don’t know what I did to deserve your friendship, Oakley, but thank you for giving it to me anyway.”

  I grip his wrist and smile up at him.

  My best friend.

  A little lost and unsure … but he’ll find his way.

  I hope we all will.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Alec

  “This is bullshit,” I grumble.

  Trick laughs. He clamps a hand on my shoulder, and I shrug him off.

  “My daughter is demanding a meeting, one you’re sure as shit gonna be a part of if I have to be.”

  “You saying she didn’t ask me to be here?” I give him a side-eye, and he laughs.

  “Ask?” He tilts his head. “No. Demanded is more like it. She knew you’d be discharged today, so I was forced to pick you up and keep you away until now.”

  “Yeah, motherfucker. I sat in that hospital bed for two weeks, waiting for today so that I could see her, and you
show up, promising to take me to her … only to drive two hours in the other fucking direction, just to turn around and come back.”

  “Hospital wouldn’t keep you longer, like I asked.” He laughs, and I glare his way. “It was either keep you in a moving car or figure out how to keep you from heading to that academy.”

  I wince when we hit a speed bump before we pull into the parking lot. “Yeah, car rides with a busted-ass rib isn’t fun.”

  He laughs, whipping the truck around to park.

  I glance around, finding only Rowan’s truck.

  I swing my glare to Trick. “I wasn’t allowed to be here, but he was?”

  “He’s here every day, Alec, and don’t start your shit.” His eyes narrow. “You might have been doing a job for me, one I’ll forever be grateful for, but remember, you took it willingly. Eagerly in fact, and you have to figure out how to come back from that. You know my daughter. A pass is what you won’t get without a solid explanation, and even then, that might not be enough for her.” His face hardens even more. “And you will accept whatever decision she makes.”

  The fuck I will.

  I know she deserves answers, and I’ll give them to her, but if she chooses to walk away, it’ll be with my shadow at her feet.

  He knows damn well I can’t look back, and while he won’t admit it, he’s happy about it. He knows I’d give her everything she ever wanted, die for her in a heartbeat.

  And that’s what he wants for her.

  “Look, Alec, I should probably tell you now.” He eyes me, and the worry in his stare puts me on edge. “She’s been staying with him since she left the hospital.”

  “Staying with him.”

  He nods slowly, his gaze flicking between mine. “Said it was where she felt most comfortable, which I can’t say I didn’t understand.”

  I try to frown, but son of a bitch if the anger doesn’t instantly morph into a pain I’ve never known. A deep ache only buries deeper with each breath. Pain driven by fear, the type you can’t just bear and brave. The kind that sears your soul.

  She chose to be where he was.

  That shit burns.

  And what happens if she’s decided we are too far lost? Shit, we didn’t even really start. They’ve had a decade of growing together.