Healing the Highlander's Heart

by Scarlett Adams

  And then when she had been about to leave on the false excuse of Mistress Eubh needing her in the kitchen, the man had entered and the very air had become so dense it was hard to breathe again. She had never met someone in the two years of her life that she could remember that was wrapped up in completely violent aura.

  Lili must have gasped out loud because Dougal turned his head sharply to her as did the man and his pale gaze on her almost felt invasive, like a slimy repulsive thing on her. She thought she saw a flash of recognition in the depth of those cold, cold eyes but it was gone before she thought about it.

  “Is there something wrong, lass?” he asked in a soft voice but all Lili could hear was the hissing of a snake, she wouldn’t have flinched if she had caught a glimpse of a forked tongue.

  Lili shook her head. “Nay, my laird. Just felt slightly dizzy is all.”

  “I see.”

  “Ye can leave Lili. Give my thanks to Mistress Eubh for the fine meal.”

  Lili bowed her head gratefully and fled just as Dougal was inviting the chief to break breath with him.

  Who was he? Lili thought as her lungs drew in the cold evening air greedily until she was doubling over, coughing. She knew he was the chief of Campbell clan and apart from that nothing. But he had seen so familiar, that he had been a prominent figure in her past life and he might have known how she had come to be in the loch with her memory lost. But how could he have been? He was the chief of Campbell and she was a nobody, a mere kitchen maid. Or was she? If Peigi and Finlay were to be believed, then she was the lost daughter of a murdered lord and that would make chief Hamish her uncle. She shook her head, refusing to believe. She must have been listening to them too much to even entertain that thought. If she had been truly the daughter of a chief of such a big clan, why had no one come searching for her in the past two years that she had been in the castle? It wouldn’t be that hard to send out a search party for her. Unless they’d believed she was dead, just like her father had been!

  The thought struck her so sudden that she reeled from that discovery. The subject of her dream came clearly to mind and she felt as though she was walking that path again, riding in the woods with a man, her father. It was early spring as she was challenging him to a race. She had won, but because he had let her and she was arguing about it, while laughing. Then someone had approached from behind on a horse. It was her father’s brother and he finally had a face. The chief’s!

  Lili closed her eyes and shied away from that image as though trying to write it off, she didn’t want to accept it. She was just a kitchen maid who has lost her memory, her mind was just trying to connect threads that didn’t match and it was because of Peigi’s and Finlay’s wild tales. She massed her temples thinking of the work she had to do in the kitchen, she should return there and pretended this never happened. She wasn’t doing anyone good by being here and trying to puzzle out the past while there was bread to bake and haggis to make.

  Mistress Eubh was surprised she was back so early and she was glad she had a legitimate excuse to be back in the kitchen, she would have looked a fool if she had returned merely because she had felt uncomfortable to be in his presence. How Moire would have laughed and Mistress Eubh’s lips would have tightened with disappointment.

  Lili told Mistress Eubh the laird had had a visitor that was why he had dismissed her. “He asked me to thank ye for such a fine meal.”

  Mistress Eubh smiled a wistful smile before a curious light appeared in her eyes. “Who was he with?” she asked,

  “Chief Hamish of the Campbell clan,” Lili answered and somewhere in the kitchen a chinaware smashed to the floor and broke.

  They both turned to see a white-faced and trembling Peigi, she was looking at Lili with something akin to horror on her face that she felt a sharp jolt of unease looking at. Upon seeing Mistress Eubh was also staring at her, she sprang into motion and began feverishly hunting for a besom and when she couldn’t find, she bent to scoop the broken pieces into her hands, whilst muttering how sorry she was.

  “it’s nothin’ lass,” Mistress Eubh said gently while Lili went to her with a besom and helped her sweep up the shards of the broken pottery.

  “Thank ye milady, thank ye.”

  “I told ye not to call me that,” Lili whispered with a bite to her voice that made Peigi flinch and she instantly regretted using that tone but the woman calling her milady was making her feel uncomfortable.

  “Aye, mi– Lili,” she corrected herself. “We’ll need tae talk,” she whispered,

  “About what?” Lili demanded and winced at how she sounded but she couldn’t take it back. She knew what the diminutive woman was referring to but she didn’t want to accept it, hoping if she acted daft and unwilling enough, Peigi would drop it and go find someone else to torment.

  “Aboot the chief,” Peigi hissed, looking at Lili as though she was slowwitted. “He has come fur ye, jus’ like master Finley said he would. We have tae git ye oot of here.”

  “He has not come for me and I am not going anywhere with you or Finlay, no matter how you insist that ye know me.”

  The steward had employed Peigi and Finlay shortly before the chief died and they had been here for a fortnight and in those days they had managed to insert themselves as nuisance into her life, following her everywhere and trying to convince her of things that made little sense to her. Peigi had been employed to work in the kitchens so she had easier access to her, staring at her unabashedly and calling her milady in the hearing of those that worked in the kitchens. At first, Lili had thought Peigi must know her from her former life and was eager to hear about it until Peigi told her she used to be her handmaiden and after her father had died Lili had disappeared and she and Finlay had had to flee the castle in search for her and just when they had given up hope, here they were safe and sound.

  Lili had thought Peigi was crazy after that and tried to avoid her but the woman was everywhere, even in places where Lili thought was secret. On the afternoon before the chief died, Peigi had cornered her in the bell chamber where she had gone to look for Ailbeart and manhandled her to the paddock where the horses were left to roam and to Finlay who had been looking after the horses. It was there that Finlay had pronounced himself as her brother and the true chief of the Campbell clan and he had come to take her away from this place before her uncle found out she was here because he had some dark designs on her.

  She had thought they were both mad, to come here and say that to her. But there had been some of their story that had rang true, when Finlay had announced he was her brother she had gotten a weird vison of a glen and the sharp ringing of childish laughter but she paid no mind to it. Although she wanted to know about her past, she wasn’t so desperate as to believe the words of two strangers. Sometimes she suspected Moire must have hired them to mess with her but she knew if the voluptuous woman wanted to get at Lili, that kind of scheme wasn’t her style, she oddly preferred the direct style of confrontation. If they weren’t hired, why where they here? that had been the one question that had plagued her since they arrived in her life. Could they have mistaken her for someone else? It was possible but when Lili had tried to insinuate they were making a mistake about her they had immediately shot down that idea that she hadn’t tried to dissuade them again. Thankfully, with the castle in mourning they had mercifully left her alone although they had been shooting dark meaningful glances at her for the past few days and Lili felt a chill anytime she caught their glances or thought about it.

  Now, Peigi was giving her a look full of such pity that it made Lili feel stupid for her outburst, she was being warned of a trap yet she was insisting on falling into it.

  “Will ye two stop yer connivin’ murmurs and let the rest of us git on wi’h our works!” Moire snarled and Peigi jerked as though scaled before murmuring something Lili couldn’t catch and shuffling away.

  “We dinnae hae all day, Lili,” Moire continued, scowling down at Lili who ignored her and continued with sweeping u
p the shards and tossing them out before returning to the job Mistress Eubh had assigned for her and soon she was chopping fish to care about chief Hamish, Peigi’s reaction to him or the need to talk about his presence in the castle. All other thoughts had faded away, even that of her worry for Ailbeart and Dougal.

  Chapter 17

  There was something bothering Lili, Dougal concluded. Something about the chief that had just visited. It hadn’t been a dizzy spell as Lili had said, it had been about the mysterious Chief Hamish, Dougal was very sure.

  He had seen her face when the clan chief had entered his solar, it hadn’t been mere fright but full on fear of the man and if she could disappear from the solar in that instant she would have. Dougal wanted to know why she reacted like that to the chief. True there was something off about him, something untrustworthy, but Lili had no business with him so she had no reason to look that way. Unless she had. Lili’s past was a blank slate of unknowns and she could have met the chief some time in her past.

  The man had only come into the solar to offer a private condolence and offered a longwinded reminisces about clan Campbell and clan Domhnall being friends for generations. About his father being his own personal friend, Dougal found that untrue, his father might have been friends with the pervious chief of Campbell but he had nothing but disdain for the current one. It was obvious the man’s mind wasn’t on his speech and Dougal wondered what he was wasting both their evenings for telling him about things he clearly did not feel. He hadn’t wanted to see him for any serious reasons or requests, it was more like he had come in to confirm something which he had and he had to make casual conversation because of that before he left.

  Whatever had been his reasons for seeking him out, it made Dougal suspicious and wary and as he left for the great Hall long after chief Hamish was gone, he whispered to Alec not to let the chief out from his sight through his visit and to report an instance of suspicious activities to him.

  Much later, after everything was over and his thoughts were free of things he had to do, Dougal revisited the untouched tray of food on the platter. It had become much too cold to eat but for some reason it had brought a smile to his face knowing that Lili had brought it up for him. He wondered if she was asleep or busy clearing up the remains of the feast. Suddenly seized by the desire to see her before he turned in, he summoned a guard and ordered him to deliver a message. Then when the guard had gone, he recovered the platter and made his way down to the gardens, his suspicion about chief Hamish’s visit long gone from his mind. Dougal felt curiously light at heart and he strolled down to the garden, it was a moonless night so he had to carry a lantern and wondered if Lili would bring a light as well. He wouldn’t want her tripping over her feet and cutting her skin open on the tiny rocks and pebbles that littered the floor. So he did his best to sweep all he could out of his way with his feet, the light hearted feeling still persisting.

  Dougal headed for the place where he had caught Seonag and the lad Ailbeart confessing their love. That had seemed in another time, years ago, so much had happened after that. His father had intended this to be a place of love for him and his wife, Caitir but that had been a foolish dream. Dougal took the necklace he had brought with him out from his pouch, it had been a gift of his father to his mother, a profession of his love to her and tonight it would serve the same purpose with Lili, if she accepted.

  It was a curious request, Lili thought as Mistress Eubh burdened her with yet another tray before the night was over and for some reason she was all smiles. Dougal had specifically requested her to bring food to him in the garden or as the guard put it, the maid that had served food to his solar before the feast. For some reasons that had both made her heart leap in anticipation and cringe in irritation. Could he had just asked for her by name? But the look on Moiré’s face eased her irritation a bit, it was a look of one that has swallowed a particularly sour lemon.

  “Noo, hurry tae ‘im lassie. He barely ate at the feast and he mus’ be starvin’ by noo. Dinnae come back unless he has finished eatin’, ye hear me lassie?”

  Lili nodded that she had although internally warring with the leave to spend her night with Dougal and the desire to do all that; and her need for sleep. She had been working hard today and her body ached all over. If Dougal decided to pick at his food as he had done at the feast, she would remain standing before him for hours on end. The thought made her grouchy.

  “Take a licht wi’h ye, ‘tis a dark nicht the nicht.”

  So grumbling, she set out for the garden in the inner bailey; scowling something fierce and grunting in return to the greetings the guards hailed her with. It was pitch black tonight and the cold nipped at her exposed ankles but the dozens of torches surmounted about and the braziers by which the guards warmed themselves gave her light to see all the way to the gardens entrance.

  The lamp she carried on the tray with the food, gave just a tiny halo of light so she had to be careful with how she placed her feet. She made several missteps but managed to keep herself or the tray from falling and as she was grumbling about the dark night, something touched her shoulder from behind, gripping hard and she jumped turning around, her scream splitting the silent air. A sour tasting hand slammed itself on her mouth, shutting off her scream as effectively as plugging a leaky pail. it was a miracle she still maintained grip of the tray and in the tiny pool of light cast by the lamp, she saw the pale face of her attacker and it wasn’t Dougal as she hoped it would be and that only increased her fear.

  “Yer brother, where is he?” the attacker demanded, shaking her by the shoulder.

  Who? Was the only thing Lili could think of but she gave a whimpering noise in answer. The man gave a growl of rage and took away his hand.

  “Scream and I’ll slit yer throat frae ear tae ear. Ye hear me?”

  Lili nodded vigorously.

  “Noo, I ask again, where is yer brother?”

  Lili still didn’t know who he was referring to, she had no brother that she knew of unless he was referring to Finlay. Then…

  “Lili!” Dougal called from the darkness and Lili felt herself sag with relief at the sound of his voice.

  With a last ground of frustration, the man let her go and disappeared into the shadow. Somebody touched her and she jumped again but it was Dougal.

  “Are ye alright, Lili? I heard you scream!” he had a lantern with him and she was grateful for the light.

  “An animal startled me,” she lied and puzzled about the reason she did so. If she told the truth, Dougal would have one after the man and she was certain chief or not, the man would hurt or kill Dougal. Something she wouldn’t like to happen.

  But it appeared Dougal didn’t believe her, she saw the skeptical expression on his face. “An animal?”

  “Aye, a cat I think, Startled me that wee devil.” She gave a soft breathy laugh that trailed away into an uncomfortable silence on her part as she remembered she was before the chief of her clan. She moved away from his reach, so his hand would drop from her shoulder and gave a weak smile. “I beg your pardon my laird, I didna mean to disturb ye with my scream. I brought your supper as ye requested.”

  “I see,” he turned on his heels and began striding away. “Come with me.”

  Lili had no choice but to follow. Her encounter with the man had shaken her to the core. If Dougal hadn’t come along, he would have hurt her or worse. And why was he looking for Finlay? Why did he think Finlay was her brother? Was he drunk or crazy? Somehow Lili didn’t think he was either. Scary, but not crazy. And what was worse, she felt she knew him but it did not bring her comfort. Whomever he had been in her past life, it hadn’t been a pleasant person. Does his attack mean Finlay was right about her? She was truly the daughter of chief Angus of the Campbell clan, lost for two years on the day her father was murdered. She didn’t want to believe that. Whoever she was, whoever that man had been, he wanted to find Finlay to hurt him. She should warn him before he was able to get to him.

  “Here,�
� Dougal said softly, breaking through her thoughts.

  They had come to an arbour with a stone bench and Dougal set the lantern on the grass before taking his seat.

  “Set it down here,” he bade her and she did so and stepped back. “What are ye doing?” he asked frowning up at her.

  “Mistress Eubh bade me to stay with ye until ye were done eating.”

  Dougal nodded as though that made sense. “’Twill not do ye good to stand above me all night. Sit down,” he patted the space next to the tray and hesitantly, Lili sat down. She could smell the scent of him, it was faint but she still caught the aroma of pine, parchment and his own male scent borne on the wings of wind and teasing her nostrils. It was a heady aroma that Lili wanted to get lost in. her eyes were closing to better appreciate the scent when her stomach growled, horribly loud. Her eyes snapped open as her cheek burned with embarrassment at the antics of her belly. She hadn’t eaten more than two spoons of porridge since morning and had been working since then. Her tiredness had driven the thought of hunger away from her mind when all she had thought about was sleep, now that her body was oddly awake, her stomach seemed to decide it was time she attended to it.

  Dougal’s chuckle even made her cheeks burn the more and she was about to die from mortification when he tore the loaf of bread into tow and passed one to her.

  “Here, take it.” He offered.

  “No, my laird. That is yours, it’s not for me to eat out of your meal.”

  “But it’s mine to offer, so have it. I wouldna want my watcher to pass out from hunger when there is enough to share from.”

  Lili took it. “Thank ye, my laird.”

  Dougal suddenly laughed. “I’ll never get used to hearing that.”

  “What?” Lili inquired.

  “Hearing people call me my laird or something like that.”

  “I suppose your father must have felt the same way when he was made chief for the first time.”