"For fuck sake, Matty, stop playing with my nipples and fuck me."
Her face twisted with need. She raked her nails down my chest.
"I mean it."
I couldn't refuse her. Hell, I couldn't refuse me.
I pushed aside the thin strip of her shorts and tickled my fingers over the flesh of her mound. She thrust even further forward, perching herself on the very edge of the bench.
God, I could smell her arousal as I ran my finger along her slit. So wet and hot and ready. I slipped my finger inside her.
She moaned, so throaty and primal. Her hips rose to meet my hand and her breath became raggedy, with sharp, sudden gasps. But I couldn't take my gaze from her face, her eyes half-closed with arousal, her features distorted with ecstasy. I'd never be able to look at another woman again.
As she shuddered into orgasm, she threw her head back. That gorgeous neck, slick with sweat, exposed to me. I ran my tongue along over her flesh before taking a playful nip. I sunk my teeth in harder as those shudders intensified.
Fiona screamed my name.
Matt
I THOUGHT IT MIGHT be strange waking up next to Fiona the next morning, that she'd have doubts or regrets, but she grinned lazily at me. I smiled back at her. Her hair clung to her face and she put her arm over my chest, snuggling into my side. My heart leaped. No awkward morning-after, just intimacy. Could this be more perfect?
"I'm going to take a shower soon," she said. "Want to join me?"
"Hell yeah." As if I'd ever say no to that.
Her fingers crept down my belly. I wanted to squirm away as the touch tickled me, but held my breath.
"When we get in the shower, I'm going to suck your cock," she said. "Do you want me to suck you until you blow or do you want to stay hard so you can fuck me?"
Oh my God. Yes, it could get more perfect.
She'd moved her fingers so they teased lightly over my cock. Between that and her question, I'd become rock hard. I wasn't sure what to answer. Had a man ever been given a more difficult choice? I wanted it all.
"You pick," I said, caressing her face.
"No, I want you to. This is about your pleasure."
Hell, I wasn't sure. "I want to fuck you again," I said. "I want both."
She laughed. "Greedy. We'll see what we can do."
She got out of bed, walking naked to my bathroom. I followed her, far enough behind that I could admire the perfect curve of her ass.
I turned the shower on. As soon as we got under that warm water, she squatted down and ran her tongue down my belly. The water splashed off my skin and she lapped at the droplets, slowly lowering herself down until she reached my cock.
Her tongue twirled around the head, licking and playing. I wanted to pull her to me and give her the pleasure she was giving to me, but I couldn't stop her now. I just had to take it.
As her lips wrapped around my cock, I tangled my fingers in her hair. Water dripped into my eyes but I couldn't wipe it away, not now. Not with her doing that.
I groaned, thrusting into her as she worked her mouth along my cock, taking me deep. She looked up at me with a hunger in her eyes I'd never seen there before and it shook me to the core of my being. It was all I could do to keep myself upright.
I wanted to hold back. Oh hell, I tried. But the way she worked me with her lips and her mouth and her throat, the pressure built to a crescendo that I couldn't resist.
Then nothing else mattered.
With one final thrust, I emptied myself into her, the world seeming to end around me.
I guess that answered her question.
She swallowed it all, then I pulled her to me and kissed her. The saltiness of my juice lingering on her tongue.
"I came too soon," I said.
But it didn't matter. It only took the briefest moment before she had me hard again. We stepped out of the shower and I bent her over the vanity unit. Her face reflected in the mirror while I fucked her from behind. My cock had never known such pleasure.
After we got dressed, I asked Fiona about her plans for the day.
"I have to ring Bridget to discuss this event. And I have to go to my apartment to sort through things."
"I can help you with that, if you like."
All the softness left her face.
"I'm okay," she snapped.
Then the fake smile switched back on as though nothing had happened. But I couldn't ignore it. I guess sexual intimacy wasn't enough to break down that wall she put up around herself.
"Sorry, Fiona, I don't mean to pry into your private life or anything like that. I just thought it might be easier with both of us. If you don't want me to help, that's totally your call."
I got up and went to the kitchen. It seemed like a good time to make coffee. Fiona came in a moment later. She leaned on the doorframe, not coming fully into the kitchen.
"Sorry, Matt. I'm just used to being a private person. It's not a big deal, and I can get everything sorted out in an instant."
"Sure. Coffee?"
"Oh, yes. Thanks."
I wanted to pull her to me but I hesitated. I wasn't sure where the boundaries were now. I could fuck her, I could caress every inch of her body but as soon as I mentioned going to her apartment, she closed up completely. I didn't want to upset her but I couldn't live my life on eggshells either.
She came into the room and stood beside me.
I wasn't sure about anything. It'd been one night. I needed to know where this was going but I couldn't put that into words. It was way too early for that kind of talk. Instead, I just rubbed her arm as I waited for the coffee machine to heat up.
"This is a good thing you're doing. I'm sure Bridget must appreciate the effort."
"I hope so. I haven't done anything like this before. Sure, I've been to a ton of charity events but I've never really thought about the organization behind it. But, it's good for me too. I've been bored out of my brain, not working. Even when I am working, half the day is just sitting around waiting for makeup and hair or for someone to adjust the lights."
"The glamorous life, right?" I gave her a wry smile, happy that the crankiness had passed.
Fiona
I HADN'T MEANT TO SNAP at Matt. I knew he was just trying to be helpful but I hated the thought of anyone in my space. Even if we were going through my old stuff, I worried that something would be unearthed. One of my dark secrets. It was nothing but paranoia. I had nothing like that in my apartment, no incriminating evidence. Still, I worried.
I'd only been back to my apartment briefly to get my things that time after I was released from hospital. When I opened the door, the apartment had a weird smell from being closed up too long. It happened sometimes when I'd been traveling for work too. I opened a window to let some air in, then went to work on the junk cupboard.
Unless I was gifted something I really wanted, most of the things I was given went in the junk cupboard. Well, sometimes I took a bunch of stuff to the office for Madeline and the girls to go through. They loved me for that.
I wasn't supposed to sell any of this stuff but donating to charity fell into a gray area. It wasn't like any of the designers could complain about it without looking like total bastards.
The first box I pulled out was stuffed full of handbags. I almost regretted not bringing Matt with me or at least borrowing his car. It'd be a killer dragging all this stuff downstairs. Most of the bags were fine. Most of them were still in those fabric bags they pack them in, actually. I'd never even looked at them. Talk about a life of privilege.
I sorted through another box full of random stuff. I set aside the coffee machine. I liked using Matt's and even if I rarely used it, having coffee at home was totally convenient.
Shoes. Jewelry, all of the costume kind. Some books. I'm not even sure why people sent them to me. By the time I finished, I had about eight boxes. I took them down to the lobby and called a cab. Bridget said to take it all straight to her house.
"Are you sure you want t
o donate all this stuff?" she said. "Some of these bags are worth a fortune."
Her eyes widened. Again, it struck me as strange that people put so much value on designer stuff.
I shrugged. "They're worth nothing to me. Just taking up space. But help yourself to anything you want."
"People just give you these things?"
"Yep. They want me to be seen wearing their things. It's free advertising for them, especially if I get photographed out somewhere. But really, who needs it all? It's a relief to have it out of the house."
"Thanks for your help in all this. The other parents have been blown away by all you're doing."
"Anything to help. Hope it's not a pain having all my stuff here."
"No problem at all. And you said Ash Savage will MC the audition? Wow, my heart's fluttering."
She grinned that fangirl grin. Ash did that to people.
"Yeah, he's happy to do it. We need to get organized. Book a place to hold it and get some promotion happening. I've made lists."
Together, we went through the lists. I'd put together suggested venues and other ideas for the event.
"If you think any of these places are appropriate, then I'm happy to go with your opinion. You know way more about glamour events than I do. Sheesh, I'll need to get a new dress. Will I get to meet Ash Savage? I might need to book the hairdresser too."
I laughed. Then I got serious for a moment.
"Bridget, I hope you don't think I'm taking over on this. I don't want to hurt people's feelings."
"To be honest, most of the parents hardly have time to worry about things like this. We need to do the fundraising for the school to function, since the government funding barely covers anything but it's a hard to find the time."
I nodded. I could imagine having to work and care for a special needs child didn't leave much time for event planning.
"I've got a few other people donating stuff and Matt has the StarX merchandise. I'll make the calls tomorrow. Once we have a place booked to hold the auction, we can go ahead with publicity."
Bridget nodded. "One of the other parents, Smithy, said he's happy to handle all the bookings. He'll put together a website for us too. Anything else you need, just tell us."
I nodded.
We finally got things organised and sat down to have a drink.
"So, what's happening in the rest of your life?" she asked. "You look really perky."
I wasn't about to tell her about my sex life with Matt. Even if I wanted to, it was all too fresh. I didn't exactly know what I was getting into. This wasn't a thing that could last forever. I'd been selfish, even starting something with him. I hadn't had a serious relationship since Savage, and that had hardly been serious. We'd been teenagers, even if we'd gone out for a while. Most guys since had been one-night stands. Maybe one-week stands. A few on-going things but nothing more than just sex.
With Matty, even if the sex was sensational, it'd never be just sex. There'd always be emotions mixed in. Maybe I was screwing up the best friendship I'd ever had. Maybe I was making the biggest mistake of my life. But, for now, whenever I thought of Matt, I couldn't keep the huge grin from my face.
Matt
SINCE FIONA WAS OUT for the day, I decided to visit the old group to get the stuff signed. I called around and organised to meet up with the guys. Luckily, they were all free. All except Savage, but I could catch up with him any time.
"How come you ended up with this stuff anyway?" Nick asked when I called into his place.
Nick Charming, as he was known to the fans. God, those names they'd given us had been lame. Savage still stuck to his though. I guess it suited him.
"The manager gave it to me. I asked him, thinking it'd make for good Christmas presents but then I realized how much of a wanker I'd look doing that, so I just shoved it all in a corner of the garage."
I sat in Nick's living room. He had photos of himself everywhere. I guess Savage did too but it seemed less pretentious when he did it. Or maybe it was just that everyone expected pretentiousness from Savage, in an ironic, self-depreciating way. That was the paradox of Savage.
With Nick, it seemed more like he was desperately clinging on to former glory. Maybe because all those photos showed him as a cutesy prepubescent boy.
He picked up a few t-shirts from the carton. "This stuff would be worth a fortune now, especially signed. We could sell it online."
"Nick, we're selling it to raise money for a school for special needs kids. Do you want to take money from that?"
He dropped the t-shirts. "I guess not."
I handed him a pen and he got signing.
"I've been asked to be a judge on one of those reality TV shows," he said. "You know, one of those talent things. Do you think that means I'm a has-been?"
It wasn't my kind of thing, that's for sure. I'd hate it. But Nick hated being out of the spotlight. I think it'd been harder for him than anyone. He'd always been the little, cute one in the group. People had made a huge deal about him. Then he'd hit puberty and all the cuteness disappeared. A lot of fans took that as a personal affront. He'd always thought that if he just worked harder, kept pushing it, the good times would come back. For Nick, they never did.
"No way. Those shows are really popular. It might be just the thing you need to get more work."
"True. Better to be seen than fade away."
"I'm happy with fading away. I'm fading so fast, I'm almost transparent." I held my hand up to the light to prove it.
"You're full of joviality today. Savage is the one who should be fading away. He's getting too much attention. Always has. It's just dumb luck."
Nick picked up another t-shirt to sign.
I didn't want to mention that Savage's dumb luck had a helluva lot of hard work behind it. He put on this slacker image, and that fooled a lot of people, but it was just a front. He took his work seriously. Well, except for acting. The guy really was a lousy actor.
"Who's organizing this thing anyway?" he asked.
"Fiona."
He leaned back and laughed. "Fiona? You're fucking kidding me. Those kids won't see a cent of that money. She'll blow it all on drugs."
My hands balled into a fist. I didn't want to fight with Nick, not when I'd asked him to do a favor like this, but he was really crossing the line.
"She's clean."
"For how long? You know that won't last. Step away from her, Matt. Just step away and keep stepping. She's bad news, and you don't want to deal with Ash's slops."
I'd never punched Nick before but now I saw why Ash had so many times. I bundled up the t-shirts and threw them back into the carton.
"Thanks. I'll be going now," I said to him.
If I stayed around any longer, there would be violence.
"You're not mad about that Fiona remark, are you? Just giving you some life advice."
"You can keep your life advice to yourself."
I walked back to the car, knowing I shouldn't let him get to me. Nick had a lot of bitterness about many things. His words meant nothing. Still, he should learn when to keep his mouth shut.
I'd arranged to meet Lindly and Makin at a bar downtown. First drink I'd had in a while. They'd been Lindly Mischief and Makin Smart. I'd gotten off lightly with Wilde.
"Jeez, I haven't signed anything in a while. I'll get a cramp in my hand," Makin said.
"Remember when you could do 100 autographs in ten minutes? You broke the group record," Lindly replied.
They both laughed.
"Good times," I said.
"Ha, well if people want this stuff and we can help a few kids out, it's no problem," Makin said. "No skin off my nose having to sign a few things. I can't believe people still care. Maybe we should get back together. Have a reunion show."
"NO!" Lindly and I both screamed.
"Have you forgotten what it was like?" I said. "The fights. The yelling and screaming. God, we hated each other by the end of it."
"Still, we had fun," Lindly said. "I d
id think Ash was going to kill Nick a few times."
"Yeah, Nick should learn to keep his mouth shut," I said, then took a swig of my beer.
Lindly and Makin stared at me. I guess I normally kept neutral in band stuff but Nick had really pissed me off.
"What? I can't have an opinion?" I said.
Then Makin told me about how he'd started his own management company. He had the right idea.
"Got a couple of promising acts signed up. It's a whole other world on this side of things, being the one pulling in the cash instead of doing all the hard work."
"We pulled in a bit of cash ourselves," Lindly added. "Well, I did."
"Yeah, but you got all the plum acting jobs," I said. "Still do. That's where the money is."
"You think?" Lindly laughed.
None of us had come out of the group too badly off, money-wise at least. We were set for life, if we weren't stupid. Lindly had managed to shake off the whole boy band image and have a serious acting career, which was something Nick had never managed.
Before I could order another beer, I got a message from Fiona. She'd finished up and was heading home.
"Sorry, guys. I've got to get out of here. I've got someone waiting for me at home."
I tried not to smile as I said that. I wasn't some love-struck boy with his first girlfriend, although sometimes, with Fiona, it felt like I hadn't moved far beyond that stage.
Fiona
I HAD A SHOWER BEFORE Matty got home. All that sorting had left me sweaty and covered in dust. I'd rather be fresh and clean when I saw him. I reapplied my makeup and put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. That looked good. Casual but stunning. I couldn't believe that I was actually doing this. This thing threatened to overwhelm me if I thought about it too much.
I wasn't a person who fell in love. I was definitely not a person who people fell in love with. People admired me, they wanted to be me but they never loved me.
While I waited for Matty, I rang a few venues. We didn't want to wait too long to hold the auction but we needed to have somewhere booked. The original idea had been to hold a jumble sale in a church hall but, with the plans all changed, a church hall wouldn't do at all. I rang a few hotels but they had no openings, then decided to call Georgie, who owned a club downtown.
Rock Mayhem: 8 Complete Rock Star Romance Novels Page 34