“I don’t know how you do this, man—get under my skin. Well, I do, but never mind. So, anyway, let’s not talk about it. Even now, as you just witnessed, I can’t really.”
I pulled him in tighter to me. “I’m sorry. I truly am. I had no idea.” Eventually his breathing evened out and I knew he’d fallen asleep in my arms. Thinking back to the last time I saw his mum, I knew she wasn’t fond of me, but to treat your son that way was horrendous.
Our summer together had come to an end and I was going to California. The thought had been both exciting and daunting. I’d get to live the dream, go to a great school—on paper—and compete in track and field during my time there. Not seeing Jamieson every day would be the worst part. He had acted so happy for me, but I knew he wished we were closer and had kept to our dream of both going to school somewhere together, or at least living in the same city. We’d had that plan even before we expressed our feelings for each other and became more than best friends.
And I’d be away for four years, at least. We were both young. He’d want to explore, surely, as would I.
Jamieson said he was going to work in Manchester and he’d lined up some roommates and had saved a bit of money while he decided what he wanted to do. Even though it would be cheaper to stay at his parents’ house, I knew he couldn’t wait to get away. Couldn’t say I blamed him.
The night before I left, Jamieson had come to stay over. We’d still kept our relationship a secret, and I was okay with that. It was so new and only for us. My parents had just assumed my best friend was staying over. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but I couldn’t bring myself to care.
I rubbed the Disneyland castle pendant around my neck and smiled. “We’ll go to Disney together one day when I’m back, okay? Thank you again for the gift. It’s the most special thing I’ve ever gotten.” I turned to him and smiled slowly.
Jamieson came over to hug and kiss me again. “Listen,” he said, “I want to keep in touch but I want you to do your best, have the best time. You are meant for this. And if we’re meant to be when you’re back, we will be. But don’t, ah, don’t deny anyone just because of me.”
I nodded. “Same for you. You do what you need to and we’ll see what happens.”
We had both turned away quickly then, in our own thoughts. My parents would take me to the airport early the next morning and he’d come. It would be torture not to kiss him, but that was why we had our last night together.
“I need you inside of me, please,” I had pleaded with him and went to lock the door. “Can you be quiet for once?” I laughed, thinking that humour was the best option.
“Oh right, you’re the one who could be heard in the next shower stall at the school gym that time I gave you a blow job.” And then Jamie had done a perfect impression of me to the teacher after that incident when I came out of the showers with only my towel on while he had stayed quietly under the water.
“No, I’m not hurt.”
“Someone said they’d heard a keening noise or something?”
“Right, yeah well, I was under the water and it got too hot so I kind of screamed when I jumped out from under it and turned the water down.”
Then I went back in the shower and we held on to each other, trying not to burst out laughing.
“Very funny,” I said and went over to pull his shirt off and tickle him.
Jamie giggled and when I kissed him below his ear, goosebumps rose up on his neck area. I licked up the column of his collarbone and rubbed his nipple, making him moan.
Music was playing in hopes it would drown out any sounds. I only had to pack my carry on as everything else was downstairs near the front door for the morning.
“Wait,” I whispered and stopped.
His face dropped and I ruffled his hair. “Don’t be silly. I’ll just go say goodnight to my parents now, so they don’t bother us.”
He pulled my hand over to feel his cock and told me to be fast then.
I came back about ten minutes later to find him under the covers.
“Oh, impatient are we?”
“Just wait til you see. I tried something. I got one for you too. Lock the door.”
The urgency in his voice made me perk up, and then he had turned over and pushed his ass in the air and all I could see was a gold circle in his hole.
“It’s a butt plug. Supposed to make the feeling more intense. So, if you want, we can try it both ways.”
“Oh, I want.” Then I scurried over to Jamie and rolled the condom on him, pushing him onto his back. I lubed myself up and lifted over him. Sitting down slowly, I chuckled when he put his fist in his mouth, then I moved up and down while we got a perfect rhythm going. Rolling my hips, he pulled at my cock and the feeling was intense.
Even if a tornado had come through the room, I don’t think we could have stopped. Jamie felt amazing and hot inside me, but watching his reaction was a sight to see. I bit his nipple, which I knew he loved.
I tried not to think about this as the last time I’d ever be with him, if not for a long, long time. I shook my head and wouldn’t let my eyes glaze over. Instead, I focused on the sensation. “Your eyes, man, rolling in the back of your head. Is it that fucking good?”
His thighs clenched a bit behind me. “Oh, fuck yeah. It ups the sensation I get with you.”
I bent to kiss him and tasted the soda he must have had not long ago. “Fuck, you’re hot.”
“You are too,” Jamie said and grabbed my cock. “Come with me. Please.”
I squeezed around him. “You know it, baby.” I lifted off him and he moaned. I held my breath. “Quiet, quiet.” In a feat of amazing power, I dropped down on him ever so slowly.
Then he was panting and gasping. I couldn’t believe I could do this to Jamie—make him come undone.
I grabbed my cock and stroked, once, twice, and as he lifted his hips up into me, I had to concentrate so hard to not scream in ecstasy. I closed my eyes, leaning back, almost like I was flying on air and sprayed come all over him.
“Oh. My. God. Oh. My. God.” Was all I heard as I collapsed on top of him, sweaty and spent.
“Fucking hell, Jamie. That was just … Wow. I won’t ever forget you.”
“Promise?” He looked into my eyes, and I had to turn away quickly before he saw the tears welling up.
“I promise.” We didn’t get any sleep that night. He experimented with the butt plug he’d gotten me, and we fucked as much as we could, both scared of losing the other, I thought. Maybe.
In the morning as we took separate showers, I crumpled up my sheets and shoved them in the laundry before my mum noticed. I didn’t want to have any questions asked about the smell of sex either, so I sprayed some air freshener and hoped for the best before I had to officially leave.
I walked down the driveway with a suitcase while Jamieson was still inside talking to my dad and eating breakfast.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his mum storming towards me with a pinched mouth, and I was a bit scared if I was honest.
“You go away and stay away from my boy.” She squeezed at my arm, harder than I would have thought she was capable. Then her face was in mine, and I was so surprised by the actions of this little woman that I took a step back.
“Excuse me? Jamie’s my best friend.” I was so close to lifting a hand to her, but of course, I wouldn’t.
“You think I don’t know how you’ve corrupted him. He’s infatuated with you. And I let it go for now, but once you leave, who will he have to protect him?”
“I’m not scared of you, and Jamie is more than capable of taking care of himself. He’s practically an adult.” Then, as a finishing jibe, I couldn’t help but add, “And he enjoys everything we’ve done to corrupt each other.”
I heard the front door of my house open and she scurried off.
I never had told Jamie about that conversation. Why would I? I didn’t consider it a real threat at all.
We’d gone to the airport later that morning, where we waved each o
ther off and promised to keep in touch.
When I got to California, it started out okay. A brand new world. I chuckled. What was I now, Aladdin? They had put me in a small dorm room with a roommate. He was a complete homophobic jerk from the get-go. I couldn’t even put a photo of Jamie on the wall.
The busy student town outside of Los Angeles was friendly enough, but I was still an outsider. It was all so foreign and scary. It was like a punch to the gut and I realized I couldn’t do anything without Jamie. Or so I thought. He’d call me and tell me to be strong, that he was proud of me and I could do it. After those calls, I’d have moments where I tried to put on a brave face.
I never told him how much I hated the school part. That the track and field was okay, but while I’d been popular and had friends back home, here, I was someone who didn’t belong.
My favourite part of the day was getting up early to run on the track. Rain or shine, I’d get up to run at five a.m. to try and clear my head.
There was no one to help me with math and I was struggling. I tried going to a tutor, but they didn’t explain it in a way I’d understand. And the work, was it me or did it triple?
Between trying to keep up with schoolwork and every other waking minute spent at the track, our calls became less frequent. It also sounded like Jamieson was working all hours to save up some money.
Before I left, we’d agreed to take it day by day, not make the other one wait, and I knew it wasn’t fair to make Jamie do so. Sure, I had a few random fucks in America, but it was nothing to write home about. No connection.
I never really thought his mum’s words had meant anything, and maybe I’d been at fault for letting us drift apart at the time. I spoke into the night, unsure if Jamie could hear or not, but I told him what his mum had said, and threatened me with, and apologized for not telling him back at the time.
Finally, I got to sleep too.
Hearing a knock at the door, Jamieson jumped up off me and scurried to the far side of the bed.
Well, that was fun while it lasted. I got up more slowly and padded to the door.
My hair was sticking every which way and I only had boxer shorts on. “Hey, Marshall. Uh, what time is it? Sorry.”
“Oh, it’s okay, guys. Just … Stu whipped up breakfast if you wanna join us.” He attempted to peek around my shoulder, but I did a good job of blocking his view.
“We’ll be over in ten. Thanks, man.” I practically pushed him out the door and closed it again, walking across to Jamieson. “Uh”—I gently shook him—“Jamie.”
He flew up and looked around as if lost and shocked. “What?”
“Breakfast is ready over at the house, okay?” I ventured. I wasn’t sure if my touching him had panicked him or something else.
Silence greeted me for what felt like hours. “You want to use the shower first?” I volunteered. Just then, my phone rang, so I never did hear his answer. “Oh, hey, Gran—ma.” Why the fuck was I calling Grant grandma? And why did it feel like I was cheating on Jamie? I shook my head and moved to the corner of the room. Whispering, I told him, “I’ll be back in the city tomorrow.” He asked me if we were still meeting up. Glancing at Jamie, he was staring at me but quickly looked away. Fuck. Well, fuck him. “Yeah, sounds great. I better go here.” When I turned around again, I could hear the stream of the shower. Fucking hell.
5
JAMIESON
I stepped out of the shower and dried off. I’d brought my clothes in with me so as to lessen the temptation. I couldn’t believe that story he’d told me about my mum the last time he saw her. What a fucking bitch. I knew she treated me like shit, but I’d moved on from that. But for her to treat Carter in that way, I couldn’t stop the anger that was fueling inside me.
Listening to Carter on the phone with his latest hookup didn’t help much either. I knew he was trying to protect me or something. Like I needed that shit. I’d lasted all this time without him since that disaster at Xander’s.
As I walked out, I saw Carter staring at me. He took me in from head to toe as if he wanted to lick me or kiss me or god knows what else. Dammit. I bit my lip. I knew it was damn mean to make him feel uncomfortable, but I couldn’t help myself.
“Ah, Carter, remember Mimi?” I quirked my eyebrow up.
“Sure, yeah, of course.” His facial expressions were an epic change from surprise to understanding to horror as he realized what I was up to.
“And your gran, how long’s she been dead?” I questioned, trying not to laugh.
He looked down at the carpet and then back up at me. “Forty years.”
I watched as his face went pink from embarrassment, then I turned to go to the main cabin. “Well, I’ll see you over there.” I exited and left him to finish getting ready.
The little joking around with Carter had put a smile on my face, much as I tried to hate it. The smell of coffee lured me towards the house.
As I sat down, Stuart handed me some toast and coffee just the way I liked it, without even asking. “This is great. Are you trying to buy me off so I don’t sell a story to the tabloids?” I raised my hands. “I can see it now—‘How does the handsome model take his toast?’” And I can say, “Oh, I know all the secrets.”
Marshall came over, rubbing his hand through my hair. “Oh, no, dear Jamieson, you can’t hold that over our heads anymore.” Then he moved to wrap his arm round Stuart’s. I felt a pang in my stomach and tried to blame it on the toast.
Why was this happening … and now? Two weeks ago I’d just been in Shanghai with this amazingly flexible man. And I’d been happy enough, hadn’t I?
Now, watching the lovebirds, I pushed those thoughts away. Damn Carter for coming back into my life. “Get a room already.”
Stuart strutted over, swinging his hip into mine. “Oh, we have one.” The look he gave Marshall was breathtaking. “What? Not that I want all the details, didn’t you and Carter fuck and make up?”
I stood up, suddenly finding the house stifling. What, had they cranked the heating? I burst out the front door, leaving my coffee to get cold.
Some time later, I’m not sure how much exactly, Marshall and Jess appeared beside me. “Need to talk?” he ventured. “I’m here as a neutral party.”
“Oh, sure. Carter’s friend and Stuart’s man,” I snapped, then sighed. Absently, I rubbed Jess’s head. “Sorry, sorry, I appreciate it.”
“Let me ask you, Jamieson …” he started. “How long have I known you for?” He nudged my foot.
I managed a smile. “Well, I like to think I brought you and Stuart together. After all, I did tell him who you were.”
He gave me his glorious smile. “Right, that’s probably true. And I’ve never seen you this miserable.”
I let out a choked laugh. “I’m not miserable.”
“Well, you sure aren’t joking and laughing. Anyway, I’m glad you’ve obviously come to some sort of truce. But when you are ready, I’m here, and Stuart’s here for you. That’s all.”
I glanced up to say something, but he was already gone. Pushing my hand through my hair, I decided I needed to get back to my usual self. We were here to have a good time, and starting tomorrow, I’d be back on long-haul flights for the next two weeks.
I straightened my shoulders back and went back in. This was a weekend for Stuart and Marshall. I wasn’t the type to ruin a party, that’s for sure.
I plastered a smile on my face and even smiled at Carter for a moment. “What’s on the agenda today? I was just on the phone to the gossip magazine.”
Stuart laughed at me. “Oh stop, man.” He took a sip of his drink. “You know I have all the really gritty, dirty stories to share. I’ll only charge you …” He tapped his nose, thinking.
“You can’t afford me, but tell me the gossip. What do you do to him when he makes that—”
Stuart covered my mouth. “I don’t kiss and tell. Now, let’s go.”
We were all going to a Viking Museum and for a walk to a castle ruin, b
ut Brenna, her girlfriend, and Damien had to leave early. Brenna needed to connect with another model in Beijing. I took the opportunity to bug Marshall. “What, no glue-on moustache and baseball cap?” I enquired.
“Ah, so funny, Jamieson. No.” He took a bow. “Full head of hair and stubble.”
Stuart slapped his arse as he walked by. “No, we just role play that now.”
Marshall proceeded to turn fifty shades of red as I laughed.
I raised my hand to give Stuart a high-five. “Well played.” Then I glanced at Carter. His back was to me, but I could take in his stature: broad shoulders, much taller than me, his brown hair with hints of auburn in the light. I had his face memorized, of course. Those stunning eyes and strong jawline, and his lips? I could get lost in those lips. Soft and a gorgeous tone of pink.
Just then he turned to look at me, as if he could sense exactly what I was thinking. I met his hazel eyes and as I held his gaze, I saw so many emotions. Before I did something crazy, I had to look away. Pushing my hand through my blond hair, I bit my lip and couldn’t decide if I wanted to kiss him or yell at him.
This was so fucked up. Everything was going great. I was the joking, happy-go-lucky type. That’s what Stuart knew. What everyone knew. I’d locked my past with Carter into a sealed compartment of my mind. And now all the memories came flooding back at every turn.
As Marshall walked over to hand him a cup of something, I wondered if he still drank that disgusting concoction he used to love. Well, disgusting to me. It was coffee with condensed milk. He always said it made it taste so much better.
I shook my head and followed the guys out to the car. Playing tourist turned into a fun day. We toured the venues, laughed, and joked. My biggest highlight was joking around with Marshall.
“Really, man. I know I mess with you, but I’m so happy for you.” I smiled and patted him on the back.
He smiled back. “Thanks,” he looked lovingly at Stuart, “me too, me too.”
“Okay, okay, I know I told Stuart I wanted a video before but that was a joke.” I looked at Stuart, who couldn’t seem to hold back a laugh. “Oh, got something to say?” I asked him.
Carter (Mayfair Model Series Book 2) Page 4