A Staten Island Love Letter 5

by Jahquel J

  Last week, we had gone into town and I acted like I wanted to buy her this dress. She fell in love with it and I had the owner size her. I was able to use that to get my personal shopper to pick out a beautiful dress for her. It was too short time for something custom, but she promised that she would find me something that no one had. There were hairstylist and make-up artist due to come tomorrow morning to get her ready. I had to tell her today and I had been laying here trying to decide on how I would tell her. Her wedding dress was flying in with Justice, so I couldn’t use that.

  “Your daughters are so dramatic. Samaj acted like he tossed a bug on them and the way they performed and lock themselves in their rooms,” she came into the room laughing with Samoor in her arms.

  “Wonder where they get it from.”

  “You see… I’m gonna let that slide, but you better stop calling me dramatic,” I reached for Samoor and she handed me over to him before taking a seat on the end of the bed. “Why are you still in bed?”

  “I was comfortable. Staten called me and I had to handle a few things too, so I just laid here to do them.”

  “No work.”

  “I could say the same thing about you.”

  “Um, I haven’t worked today… so quit it,” she giggled.

  “I gotta tell you something.”

  Her smile dropped and a serious expression appeared on her face. “What now, Gyson?”

  “I’m gonna marry you tomorrow.”

  “Huh?”

  “I’ve been planning our wedding behind your back. We’re getting married tomorrow.”

  From her facial expression, I could tell she was trying to figure and sort everything I had just said to her out. “How? Our family isn’t from here? We didn’t get a marriage certificate.”

  None of that mattered when you had money. I had someone who was flying here on a favor to me just to officiate the wedding and make sure our marriage was legal. We would sign a paper here, and then once we got back to the united states, we had another paper to sign.

  “What if I told you that I figured all of that out? Would you still marry me?”

  “Without a doubt,” she quickly replied.

  “Ight. So, we’re getting married tomorrow,” I repeated myself.

  “Gyson, you sound crazy. You’ve been sleeping and sexing me like crazy… how did you find time to plan a wedding?”

  “I have my ways.”

  “Tell me those ways?” she folded her arms.

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Um, I need a dress, make-up and hair.”

  “Done, done, done.”

  “And the kids, what about them? Bet you didn’t think about that, huh?” she was so sure that I forgot about the kids.

  “Done,” I smirked.

  “Ugh, so what am I supposed to do? Show up?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “Give me my damn baby,” she rolled her eyes and them smiled. “Well, I’ll go sit and wait for this to happen.”

  “Have fun.”

  “Gyson, tell me something!” she turned back around when she realized that I wasn’t budging on the information I had. She would find everything out when it happened.

  Justice, Priest and the girls were staying at his villa, and Staten and my mom were going to stay at his place. Free wasn’t going to see them until tomorrow because they came in too late. I even had Messiah and Rasheed flying in. Messiah had been trying to link with me for a minute and I had been too consumed to reach back out. She understood I had a lot going on and told me she was going to come to the wedding. Despite whatever was going on with her and Staten, she would always show up for me, like I would for her.

  “Go get me some lemonade and I’ll make you tell me something,” I winked.

  “All you said is a word,” she darted out the room. I knew she was going to toss Samoor in Ms. Winnie’s arms, mix her little concoction up and be in here in under give minutes. I pulled my shorts off and waited for her freak ass to come back.

  Everything arrived perfectly. Free was still asleep, so I went to check on Justice and Priest, since his place was closer to mine. While Free slept, I had staff putting out the flowers and decorating the area where we would be getting married. I knocked on the door and Justice opened the door holding Yasmine while breastfeeding her.

  “We know Yasmine ate breakfast,” I laughed.

  Justice laughed. “She’s greedy. You’re getting married today, how do you feel?” she asked and all I could do was smile.

  “Jus, I feel good. I couldn’t sleep last night because I kept thinking about it. I’m ready to make her my wife.”

  She sat on the couch. “I’m so happy for the both of you. Free deserves all of this and more. You do too. Y’all have been through so much,” she popped her breast back into her shirt and started burping Yasmine.

  “I know, I know, I just want to make her happy for the rest of her life.”

  “Aw, look at this soft ass nigga,” Priest chuckled as he came down the stairs. “You could have slept next to me; my bed was big enough.”

  “I was fine in the guest room,” Justice replied. “You hungry?” she questioned and switched into the kitchen, leaving me and Priest alone.

  “She still not giving you no play.”

  “At least she’s not rolling her eyes at me,” he shrugged. “I’m working double time and she making a nigga sweat while work for it.”

  “As she should. You fucked up, so you need to work hard and earn that place back in her heart.”

  “I hear you, but I need some pussy too.”

  “Isn’t that the reason you’re in this shit now?” I laughed.

  “Fuck you!” he flipped his middle finger at me and laid across the couch. “How you feeling?”

  “Good. I’m ready to go home and see what this doctor has to say about my labs and shit.”

  “Claiming good news always.”

  “Appreciate it, man.”

  “Always. Now, about you getting married. You ready for this? We can fuel up the jet and bounce,” he kidded.

  “I ain’t never been so ready and sure of something in my life.”

  “You and Free has always been a good look. I can see the love and respect you both have for each other, and the way you both raise your children is admirable. If I’m half the father you are, I’ll be good.”

  “You’ve been a father before I was even the father. Don’t let the fact that they are your nieces fool you. You have been their father when Sandy died, and their own father didn’t show up. Keep up the same thing with Yasmine and you got this. I’m telling you.”

  “Still, I feel like I failed them or some shit.”

  “As much as you want to shelter them from life, you can’t. Kiki is going to be fine because you stepped in and got her the help she needed. Kiss took a different path, but she’ll find her way back on the straight path. And Love, she’s at the age where boys are life, you can’t control that shit.”

  “I get so angry because I wanted Kiss to go to college. She had the grades to get into any Ivy League school she wanted to.”

  “That was your vision for her life, not hers. I want my boys to play pro ball and go to college, and I want my girls to go to college and start businesses… I also know when it’s time for them to do that, the path I want for them might not be the path that they want to take, and I have to make peace with that.”

  “How do you make peace with that?”

  “You think Sandy wanted this for you? She wanted you to finish college and you dropped out. That’s how you make peace with it. You make peace by acknowledging that you were once in their shoes and never followed the path that was mapped out for you, so why should you force them to?”

  “Wise man.”

  I shrugged. “I try.”

  “I want what you have so bad,” he expressed. “The family life is something that I wanted bad as fuck, then I fucked it up.”

  “She’s here, right? She could have stayed with us or
with Staten, but she’s here… She’s giving you signals that you’re not picking up. As much anger that she holds for you, she wants to fight for this too.”

  He nodded his head. “She’s definitely making me work for it.”

  “She has to. And, when or if she decides to make it work with you, let her be. Let her live alone, let her continue being independent. Let her continue to build that life and don’t toss marriage at her. Justice went from one relationship to the next and you were there to comfort her. Yet, she has never got the feeling of living on her own and getting comfortable with being alone.”

  “I hear you.”

  “You better. Don’t bring up the idea of moving in together until you’re ready to make her your wife. I don’t mean what you just told me right now, I mean when you’re ready to deal and accept that you have toxic traits and work on them. She has the same. Do the work and break those curses for the girls and Yasmine.”

  “I hear you.”

  “I know you do,” I stood up and hugged him. “Let me get back to my villa before Free wakes up,” I told them.

  “Ight. Good looking for the talk.”

  “You already know… later, Justice.”

  “Later!” she yelled back.

  Private beach, Belize,

  6:30 PM

  Why I Love You by Major played as Freedom came down the aisle that was littered with white rose petals. Her white pedicured foot kicked her long dress up so she could walk without tripping. Her mother held onto her arm as she tried to smile through the tears she was trying to hold back. Her hair was pulled up in a big French bun with a few pieces of hair hanging loose. The mermaid dress hung onto every curve she had, even the ones she may have been hiding. The dress showed all the perfection that I loved on her body. Justice had told me she had been emotional because Liberty couldn’t come. My mama had called Free’s mom and told her she needed to be here. She also told her if she didn’t show up that she needed to act like she didn’t have kids or grand-kids, because she would make sure to fill in her role forever. I didn’t see when she saw her mother, but I heard from down the hall. She cried and screamed that her mother was able to attend and walk her down the aisle. Her mother held onto Free’s arm and held the picture of her father in her other hand. The shit had me feeling emotional as fuck.

  I don’t know if her father would have approved of me being with her. I do know that I would always protect and love her while keeping him in the back of my mind. When he looked down, I wanted him to see that his daughter found someone with flaws yet loved the shit out of her. For the rest of her life, I wanted Free to know and feel what it felt to be loved by someone real. I wanted her to know that when she went to bed angry with me, I would still wrap my arm around her, no matter how many times she swatted me away. I wanted her to know that even when she wasn’t feeling the most beautiful, she would always be the most beautiful woman to me. She had her flaws and I had mine too. Even with that, we still loved each other. I love you so much. She mouthed to me as she walked.

  Staten stood to the side of me holding Samoor, and Samaj stood beside him. Somali and Rain stood on the other side with a chair that had Skype and Liberty was on the screen with a face full of make-up, as if she was attending the wedding in person. Free and her mother finally made it down the aisle and she handed me Free’s hand and I helped her up the step.

  “Who gives this woman away?”

  “We do,” her mother said and wiped away a tear. “Me and her father do,” she looked at the sky with tears falling down her cheeks. “We do,” she said again.

  Justice stepped down and embraced her mother tightly. “It’s alright, mommy,” she told her and walked her over to her seat and then stood beside the laptop with Liberty sobbing.

  “She looks so beautiful. Like an angel,” Liberty sobbed.

  “You’re going to make me cry, Lib,” Justice sniffled. I could tell she was trying hard not to cry. Hell, it was hard for me not to cry.

  “Ma, you look so fucking beautiful,” I complimented and kissed her hand.

  “Thank you, baby. Ho… how did you know about, Lib?”

  I smirked. “She’s your twin. You shared your mother’s womb with her, it was vital that she was here, some way or another.”

  As the officiant spoke, all I could do was stare into my future wife’s eyes. She held my gaze, as I thought about the future. All I wanted was to make my family happy. The streets used to make me happy, but fuck all that, I wanted to be the family man. In the streets, you only had two ways out; prison or death. I managed to cheat the game and I wanted to keep my word to making my family my priority. The simple life with my wife is what I wanted and desired. None of that street beef meant nothing to me. If I had to go through all of that to get to this moment, I would do it in a heartbeat.

  “The couple wrote their own vows,” the officiant announced.

  “I’ll go first,” Freedom took the mic and looked at me. “I told myself I would cry and that I would write it down, but that would mean I would be writing forever. I love everything about you Gyson Davis. The way you love and protect your family is what makes me fall in love with you. How you can forgive and see the bright side of things is something I admire. I’ve watched you get out the bed every day and face the day, even though you don’t want to. You teach our kids to never give up and to always show up and out. You love me like no man has ever. When I go to bed in your arms, I feel safe. If my daddy was alive, I know for a fact that you would have given him a run for his money,” she chuckled. “I love you today, tomorrow and forever. My heart pumps for you and our children. I love you, baby,” her hands were shaking as she wiped away her tears.

  I grabbed her face and kissed her on the lips and then backed up, because it wasn’t time for that. “Freedom Reign McGurry, the day you left my life I thought I would never see you again. I tried to find you in every woman I ran across and couldn’t. When God put his stamp on you, he made sure that you were one in a million. There’s not another woman that can match the fire that burns in your soul. I know, because I tried finding her. You run your business, raise our children and me, plus finds some time to do your weekend cleaning. Even with a nanny, you’re never absent from our children’s lives. Everyone that has met you, loves you. You’ve had plenty of times to run and never look back, but instead you ran toward me teaching me that the phrase, ‘ain’t nobody gonna have your back like your future wife does,’ is true” I sniffled. “When I found out about the cancer, I expected this to be too much and for you to run. I mean, you had a million things on your plate, so running away would have been the easiest thing for you to do. Instead, you pulled your pants up and has been there for me through it all. Not once have you complained, showed defeat or cried. Each obstacle that comes our way, you’re right there ready to battle it before I can. Ma, I love you more than I love to breathe, and that’s a lot. I promise, for the rest of my life that I will continue to make you happy and put your first. As your husband, I’ll be ready to put a hole in anybody that causes you harm. I love you, Mrs. Davis.”

  Free was an emotional wreck. Tears and snot came down her face. Justice had to quickly get her together. “I lo… love…. Yo…you so much,” she sobbed.

  “For.”

  “Ever.”

  14

  Staten

  Listen to: Nobody Knows by The Tony Rich Project

  The wedding, reception and all that shit was nice as fuck. I’ve seen weddings that were planned for a year never look like Free and Ghost’s did. You could tell they were so happy. We partied on that beach until the next morning. All I thought about was Liberty. I wished she was here and with me. I missed her so much and knowing she would soon be marrying another nigga had me all in my feelings. When I flew back home, I stayed to myself for a bit because I needed to check my emotions at the door. Lately, Liberty had been on my mind and I just wanted to be with her. I wanted to make her happy like Ghost made Free. This new nigga couldn’t make her happy like I could.
Yeah, I admit, I wasn’t perfect, and I had a lot of shit going with me. Still, I could promise to love and protect her.

  It had been a month since I flew home from Belize. Free, Ghost and the kids had flown back last week for his appointment. His doctor had come to Belize to collect what she needed for his labs and his appointment next week would be when we found out if he was in remission. I ain’t never been so nervous for something in my entire life. God knew I needed my brother here and these past few months had been the hardest for me to handle.

  I haven’t seen you. We really need to talk. Maliah had sent me another text message. I didn’t know if it was depression or what that was going on with me. All I thought about was Liberty and ways on how I could make her mine again. I tried to pretend like I didn’t care and that I wanted her to be happy, and that was only half true. I wanted her to be happy with me. This other nigga couldn’t make her happy the way I could.

  I’ll come to your crib when I’m free. I felt bad for ignoring Maliah when she didn’t deserve it. I hadn’t even been by to see Satin because of my mood. I didn’t feel like hearing anybody ask me what was wrong.

  Oh wow. He’s alive! she replied back. I tossed my phone onto the couch and leaned my head back.

  Trac and Priest were making sure everything was running smoothly. I guess that was the perk of being the boss, you could do what you want and take as much time as you needed off. Ghost was in wedded bliss, and I didn’t want to bother him with my issues. I reached over and grabbed my phone, and dialed Liberty’s number from a blocked number.

  “Hellooo,” she sang into the phone. “Hello? Okay. Whoever keeps calling and not saying nothing, record my voice, it’ll last longer,” she snapped and ended the call.